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» More General Categories » Relationships and Relationships Help » Taking a 10/10 girl to a fancy banquet (I got 4 questions)
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post 1655996873 02-11-2022, 06:37 AM
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Taking a 10/10 girl to a fancy banquet (I got 4 questions)

I’ll make this short. Yes, I’m the divorced dude who loves being single. I promise myself to keep my standards high. As a matter of fact I’m taking this 10/10 girl to a fancy banquet. She’s also an engineer like me. I specifically asked her to be my date and she said yes. We are in the same organizations so we see each other a lot.
I felt she liked me last year but I never made a move due to me getting over a breakup (yes, mistake) so she might have gotten discouraged. She was the one asking to hang out and see me. But beta me didn’t make a move and I know better. In a weird way, I feel she’s lucky to come with me and not the other way around, just like it seems in this thread making it seem like I’m putting her on a pedestal.

1. What’re the rules? Do i pick her up? Hold hands?
2. I want to tell her I like her. I want to be straight up and honest — risking it all. Is this a good idea?
3. Instead of telling her I like her, should I just kiss her? (Corey Wayne and other YouTube “coaches” say to go in for the kiss)
4. What do if she rejects? (Again, in my head I’m thinking she’d be an absolute dummy to reject someone like me. And I guess there’s a fine line between confidence and cockiness)

I was with someone for 9 years so this is new to me again.
There are many other girls I’ve gone out with and made a move on them during our first hangout, but I didn’t really like them. I consider myself very confident but become a little b**** when it comes to this 10/10 girl. **** rejection. Regret is worse than rejection.
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post 1655996963 02-11-2022, 06:40 AM
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Originally Posted By chivasregal
1. What’re the rules?
The rules are you post pics
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post 1655997793 02-11-2022, 06:59 AM
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Originally Posted By PTzFree
The rules are you post pics
Not on this one, king. I had a bad experience with that in 2007 and someone notified the girl I started a thread about her. True story.
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post 1656009483 02-11-2022, 10:41 AM
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I don't know why you asked her to be your date to this event when you haven't gone on any 1on1 dates. This is something you do at (or close to) relationship stage IMO not a first date. This isn't a highschool dance lol.

Would've she been invited to the banquet if you didn't ask her?
post 1656018323 02-11-2022, 01:54 PM
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Originally Posted By skinnyfat88
I don't know why you asked her to be your date to this event when you haven't gone on any 1on1 dates. This is something you do at (or close to) relationship stage IMO not a first date. This isn't a highschool dance lol.

Would've she been invited to the banquet if you didn't ask her?
We have been on one-on-one dates.
I guess at least now I’m showing my intentions more
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post 1656019113 02-11-2022, 02:07 PM
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Dates are about 3 things

1. Fun - It's got to be fun or you have to make it fun

2. Logistics - It has to be near your place or her place to smash

3. Leading - You as a man have to lead. Initiate the conversation. Make some movies. Touch her a bit. Be flirty. Taking her from point A to point B. Take her hand and say "Hey let's go to this bar..."
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post 1656023533 02-11-2022, 03:19 PM
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first off, do not look at any "dating coaches" or any of that crap

you need to be a man, lead and do what feels right

you're already way in your head about this and need to chill out
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post 1656026553 02-11-2022, 04:21 PM
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Originally Posted By chivasregal
We have been on one-on-one dates.
...what?

You're asking about kissing/being straight up about liking her? This should've already been covered by the time she's your date to an event.

Anyways, as others have said, be a leader, be fun, be someone at the party people gravitate to. Don't be jealous/needy. But if you haven't escalated much physically I'd probably wait until after the party, especially if it's a work event.
post 1656026713 02-11-2022, 04:25 PM
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You work together?


Good lord why do you want to learn this lesion the hard way?
post 1656045143 02-12-2022, 12:15 AM
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Originally Posted By shmobin
You work together?


Good lord why do you want to learn this lesion the hard way?
How did I miss this?

It's over for you boyo
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post 1656045223 02-12-2022, 12:21 AM
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My signature move is about 1/2 to 2/3 through the date, when she goes to the bathroom or to goes get more drinks and walks back, I tell her to "come here" grab her waste, look her in the eyes, and pull her in for the kiss. Works 100% of the time erry time.

like 50% of all relationships are from people that work together.

You don't **** around at work. If you are serious, go you for it.
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post 1656052803 02-12-2022, 07:34 AM
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post 1656053013 02-12-2022, 07:42 AM
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> Treat her as property
> Be VERY physical during date
> Grab, hips, waist, hands. whatever in hell you want when you want

She will get turned on asf and be wanting D by the end of the night SRS
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post 1656055153 02-12-2022, 08:53 AM
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Stop hyping this broad up to be something she's not. She's just another woman. Get out of your own head, op, with that being said have fun, don't take it too seriously, and lead.

She already knows you like her, not sure the purpose of stating that again is. Escalate after the date since you're at a work function. If she rejects keep it cool. No more effort should be put out on your part though. Ask her over your place for the next meet up. Y'all have been on multiple dates already. Time for either her to put out or place her on the back burner and look for some new strange
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post 1656058023 02-12-2022, 10:04 AM
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I would probably abort this mission as you're likely going to make a mess of the situation.

You say she's a 10/10, objectively she is probably not. But you said that because you already have feelings for her.

The best bet for you is to at least date a few other girls first to get some experience and learn how to pick up on cues because that is what is going to dictate your moves. Having a static set of moves you apply to every woman is going to come off super cringe.
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post 1656061673 02-12-2022, 11:23 AM
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Originally Posted By cavillac
I would probably abort this mission as you're likely going to make a mess of the situation.

You say she's a 10/10, objectively she is probably not.But you said that because you already have feelings for her.

The best bet for you is to at least date a few other girls first to get some experience and learn how to pick up on cues because that is what is going to dictate your moves. Having a static set of moves you apply to every woman is going to come off super cringe.
Lol
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post 1656573523 02-21-2022, 05:49 AM
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Originally Posted By Lastrepbrah
Stop hyping this broad up to be something she's not. She's just another woman. Get out of your own head, op, with that being said have fun, don't take it too seriously, and lead.

She already knows you like her, not sure the purpose of stating that again is. Escalate after the date since you're at a work function. If she rejects keep it cool. No more effort should be put out on your part though. Ask her over your place for the next meet up. Y'all have been on multiple dates already. Time for either her to put out or place her on the back burner and look for some new strange
Went to the event this past Friday. It was a lot of fun throughout, we were vibing well, I was physical throughout the night. She laughed throughout the night, I was presented a big award at the banquet, guys were looking at her like “who did she come with?”, lol yes i had her on a pedestal but i also did neg her throughout the night where she would playfully “punch” me calling me a jerk. I went for the kiss walking back to my vehicle and she rejected it. Can’t say I’m not surprised. She said she doesn’t mess around with people she works with/is involved with professionally based on bad experiences (water is wet). She did say she’s thought about it and even told her parents about us before and said her I’m high on her parents’ radar, but that doesn’t really matter if she’s not on board. I played it cool. I told her it’s understandable she wouldn’t want to do that based on bad experiences, but that also she shouldn’t let the bad experiences dictate how every situation will unfold — possibly letting a good situation from happening. I didn’t wanna beg or apologize and left it as is. Although in retrospect i probably should have said more. Regardless, in a weird way I feel relieved. She texted me the day after sending me the selfies and pics we took. I just reacted to the pics hehe.
Let me have it, misc. don’t hold back, i can take it.
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post 1656576833 02-21-2022, 07:39 AM
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Originally Posted By chivasregal
Went to the event this past Friday. It was a lot of fun throughout, we were vibing well, I was physical throughout the night. She laughed throughout the night, I was presented a big award at the banquet, guys were looking at her like “who did she come with?”, lol yes i had her on a pedestal but i also did neg her throughout the night where she would playfully “punch” me calling me a jerk. I went for the kiss walking back to my vehicle and she rejected it. Can’t say I’m not surprised. She said she doesn’t mess around with people she works with/is involved with professionally based on bad experiences (water is wet). She did say she’s thought about it and even told her parents about us before and said her I’m high on her parents’ radar, but that doesn’t really matter if she’s not on board. I played it cool. I told her it’s understandable she wouldn’t want to do that based on bad experiences, but that also she shouldn’t let the bad experiences dictate how every situation will unfold — possibly letting a good situation from happening. I didn’t wanna beg or apologize and left it as is. Although in retrospect i probably should have said more. Regardless, in a weird way I feel relieved. She texted me the day after sending me the selfies and pics we took. I just reacted to the pics hehe.
Let me have it, misc. don’t hold back, i can take it.
I don't see what there is to let you have. She should have been more forthcoming with the whole not dating co-workers before you two ever saw each other outside of work. Sounds like she is the one in the wrong here.
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post 1656577193 02-21-2022, 07:51 AM
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10/10 engineer female

she's already fukking her boss and you're idiot that should know better
Originally Posted By chivasregal
Went to the event this past Friday. It was a lot of fun throughout, we were vibing well, I was physical throughout the night. She laughed throughout the night, I was presented a big award at the banquet, guys were looking at her like “who did she come with?”, lol yes i had her on a pedestal but i also did neg her throughout the night where she would playfully “punch” me calling me a jerk. I went for the kiss walking back to my vehicle and she rejected it. Can’t say I’m not surprised. She said she doesn’t mess around with people she works with/is involved with professionally based on bad experiences (water is wet). She did say she’s thought about it and even told her parents about us before and said her I’m high on her parents’ radar, but that doesn’t really matter if she’s not on board. I played it cool. I told her it’s understandable she wouldn’t want to do that based on bad experiences, but that also she shouldn’t let the bad experiences dictate how every situation will unfold — possibly letting a good situation from happening. I didn’t wanna beg or apologize and left it as is. Although in retrospect i probably should have said more. Regardless, in a weird way I feel relieved. She texted me the day after sending me the selfies and pics we took. I just reacted to the pics hehe.
Let me have it, misc. don’t hold back, i can take it.
you handled that well though

best possible outcome imo dont chit where you sleep
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post 1656614663 02-21-2022, 07:09 PM
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At this time I’d quietly limit too much contact and slowly turn it into a strictly professional relationship. Don’t be awkward when you see her, but don’t give her any ammo. She’s turned you down and now reaching back to you to validate somehow, anymore approaches from you can buy you a one way trip to the HR office. Be very careful here OP. I can guarantee you that whatever you do from here to pursue her will not change her mind but can potentially get you in hot water. Don’t get me too’d.
post 1656633573 02-22-2022, 05:56 AM
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Originally Posted By chivasregal
Went to the event this past Friday. It was a lot of fun throughout, we were vibing well, I was physical throughout the night. She laughed throughout the night, I was presented a big award at the banquet, guys were looking at her like “who did she come with?”, lol yes i had her on a pedestal but i also did neg her throughout the night where she would playfully “punch” me calling me a jerk. I went for the kiss walking back to my vehicle and she rejected it. Can’t say I’m not surprised. She said she doesn’t mess around with people she works with/is involved with professionally based on bad experiences (water is wet). She did say she’s thought about it and even told her parents about us before and said her I’m high on her parents’ radar, but that doesn’t really matter if she’s not on board. I played it cool. I told her it’s understandable she wouldn’t want to do that based on bad experiences, but that also she shouldn’t let the bad experiences dictate how every situation will unfold — possibly letting a good situation from happening. I didn’t wanna beg or apologize and left it as is. Although in retrospect i probably should have said more. Regardless, in a weird way I feel relieved. She texted me the day after sending me the selfies and pics we took. I just reacted to the pics hehe.
Let me have it, misc. don’t hold back, i can take it.
Nothing to let you have. EVerything was done in a cordial manner and no feelings were caught up. Only issue is she took you for a ride until confronted and then she doesn't date where she works. lol u fkn wot m8? She didn't know this prior to the three times yall went out? What an idiot. Nothing was lost here OP. Good on you for not being a butt hurt **** got and taking the rejection like an adult. No more dates and just keep it cool when running into each other. As if nothing ever happened which nothing did.
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post 1656644193 02-22-2022, 09:33 AM
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Originally Posted By Lastrepbrah
Nothing to let you have. EVerything was done in a cordial manner and no feelings were caught up. Only issue is she took you for a ride until confronted and then she doesn't date where she works. lol u fkn wot m8? She didn't know this prior to the three times yall went out? What an idiot. Nothing was lost here OP. Good on you for not being a butt hurt **** got and taking the rejection like an adult. No more dates and just keep it cool when running into each other. As if nothing ever happened which nothing did.
Thank you brahs. Yeah, I agree, I felt a bit led on, especially her initiating the times we hung out before, her saying yes to being my “date” and me putting my arm around her at the bar. I’m big on the power of walking away and scarcity mindset and that’s what I’ll do. She reached out again yesterday asking for some stuff for another event we are having next week but I kept it short, respectful and professional. She told me she’s had experiences where the dude acted all needy and would visit her workplace repeatedly and it got annoying to her, but obviously that ain’t me. I know my worth. just gotta move on and no contact other than professional stuff.

Reps to y’all
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Procedures I’ve had. Feel free to ask about them:
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post 1656725103 02-23-2022, 12:44 PM
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Originally Posted By chivasregal
I’ll make this short. Yes, I’m the divorced dude who loves being single. I promise myself to keep my standards high. As a matter of fact I’m taking this 10/10 girl to a fancy banquet. She’s also an engineer like me. I specifically asked her to be my date and she said yes. We are in the same organizations so we see each other a lot.
I felt she liked me last year but I never made a move due to me getting over a breakup (yes, mistake) so she might have gotten discouraged. She was the one asking to hang out and see me. But beta me didn’t make a move and I know better. In a weird way, I feel she’s lucky to come with me and not the other way around, just like it seems in this thread making it seem like I’m putting her on a pedestal.

1. What’re the rules? Do i pick her up? Hold hands?
2. I want to tell her I like her. I want to be straight up and honest — risking it all. Is this a good idea?
3. Instead of telling her I like her, should I just kiss her? (Corey Wayne and other YouTube “coaches” say to go in for the kiss)
4. What do if she rejects? (Again, in my head I’m thinking she’d be an absolute dummy to reject someone like me. And I guess there’s a fine line between confidence and cockiness)
Bro imagine being married previously and being this scared and bad with women, ho leee chit
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post 1656726523 02-23-2022, 01:04 PM
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if it doesn't feel right just leave it

simple
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post 1656729683 02-23-2022, 01:48 PM
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Originally Posted By BamHurgler
Bro imagine being married previously and being this scared and bad with women, ho leee chit
How did he get married in the first place?
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post 1656729733 02-23-2022, 01:48 PM
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Rules are I'm going to neg you if you don't post pics.

Just blur out the face.
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post 1656730043 02-23-2022, 01:55 PM
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You'll be okay op. Most people forget everyone is similar. We want happiness and life isn't smooth. So don't worry, all first dates will be awkward for everyone all across the globe. The good news is you'll get more comfortable with them quickly and 99% of people are good people just trying to live a happy life and enjoying it. Srs
post 1656731073 02-23-2022, 02:07 PM
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OP, you seemed to handle it as well as you could've. Onto the next.

I can't help but feel like a lot of your threads are subtle brags though (virgins, 10/10s).
post 1658135643 03-17-2022, 11:06 PM
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Originally Posted By Evantus
You'll be okay op. Most people forget everyone is similar. We want happiness and life isn't smooth. So don't worry, all first dates will be awkward for everyone all across the globe. The good news is you'll get more comfortable with them quickly and 99% of people are good people just trying to live a happy life and enjoying it. Srs
Thanks man. I took a big hit to my ego but i did get a huge boost of confidence after. I felt relieved i went for it because at least now I know. I talked to her the week after and basically told her i misread the situation (i really didn’t. She was just a **** about it not wanting to mix work and pleasure). I appreciate you!
EL PASO★STRONG
8-3-19

Procedures I’ve had. Feel free to ask about them:
- LASIK surgery (2007)
- Septoplasty (2018)
- Gum Graft (2019)
- Gynecomastia/Liposuction (2021)
post 1658135723 03-17-2022, 11:09 PM
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#30
  1. chivasregal
  2. Misc OG
  1. chivasregal
  2. Misc OG
  3. Join Date: Feb 2006
  4. Location: Texas, United States
  5. Posts: 7,987
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Originally Posted By skinnyfat88
OP, you seemed to handle it as well as you could've. Onto the next.

I can't help but feel like a lot of your threads are subtle brags though (virgins, 10/10s).
Oh no dude. The virgin blocked me already - she didn’t like the idea of me talking to girl friends. I don’t really talk to the 10/10. Right now I’m really not talking to anyone, took a hit to my self-confidence.
EL PASO★STRONG
8-3-19

Procedures I’ve had. Feel free to ask about them:
- LASIK surgery (2007)
- Septoplasty (2018)
- Gum Graft (2019)
- Gynecomastia/Liposuction (2021)
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