It's really admirable that you took the initiative to extend the invite, and I'm glad to hear he was receptive of it. Old genderized thinking would have some women out there thinking that only the guy should propose the plans. I hate that way of thinking. If you want to do something with someone, who cares if the guy or girl asks first? Not I, just as long as everyone is enjoying their time together in the end.

I'm listening to some of the advice around here and trying. I'm not an alpha female though.. If I can take the initiative at work, then I can apply it to my "dating" life.

Thanks for the feedback guys. I read them all, just not going to quote them. Very good points. My strongest skill is being able to recognize patterns with very little data. I've gone out with so many women now now over the past year (30+?), the lines are starting to get a bit blurry. Like, I may have seen a pattern with one woman 5+ times, so I only need to see it once in another woman. Maybe that's not how I should be approaching things. The women I dated early on were definitely given much more leniency than I am giving to women now, and I guess that's not really fair. I suppose I should be giving every woman a clean slate, even if my "spidey sense" is triggered early on.

Another thing I've noticed I do differently now, than 12 months ago, is that I stopped texting so much. I have excellent text game and I'm not laying down as much ground work as I was before. I was definitely having better results utilize text.How far do you get with the women you approach. Are you getting their numbers?

Use guys to build your social circle. Make friends when you go out. Get their numbers and just start making plans. There will be times I'll be out where my normal circle of friends playing pool and I'll play someone that I've never seen before and get to talking and at some point I'll just, "Say, yeah I'm usually here on x and x, give me your number and I'll give you a heads up next time if you want to play more." or they might mention the place they normally go to and I'll say something like, "Yeah I really need to check that place out," and they will ask for my number and offer to let me know when they will be their next.

Quite honestly, this is the same approach I take with women. I just talk to them like I would any other guy, but maybe with just a little more teasing and wit, and then if things seem to be going well I'll just throw out that we should hang out sometime and most of the time they give me their numbers.I'm really happy and proud of you. Just keep going with the flow.

Bolded: It shouldn't have taken success with a woman to realize this. It was always inside of you, which is what I have been trying to tell you. I hope you now realize that you could have had this mentality this entire time and can continue to have it, even if for some reason your relationship does not work out.More than one date. I'm not very aggressive at all. I expect a woman to show me at least as much interest as I am showing her and I do the same. It's very possible that I am missing out on some of these women because other guys are much more aggressive, but I refused to compete for attention. If she doesn't think I am her best option, I'd rather not be an option at all.I've told you 100 times it's not because of chad. It's also not because she wants to settle with someone that she thinks is below her. That's not how the human psyche works. People don't actually settle, they just realize their expectations have been much too high and finally evaluate what is truly important to them. When they think they found it, the hang on to it.Don't take her back. She 100% crossed a line and cannot be trusted.What are you scared of? What is making a move to you?

Update:

Teacher has not texted me back. I don't think she will. She will forever be in my spank bank though, lol. (gawd her body was so nice for a 40 year old. giggity)

The other woman did get back to me and asked me to call because she was starting to drive down to Southern CA to visit family. We were only able to talk for about 10 minutes, but even with that, I'm still unsure about her interest level. I guess we will see once she gets back.

PS for you guys that think height matters. Both of these above women are as tall as me and they both always wear wedges and heals.

Wtf, that many women and not one worth a LTR... at what point do you change your strategy to meet new women? Have most of them been online?

What are you scared of? What is making a move to you?

Scared of getting my feelings hurt and being embarrassed. We have mutual friends. I kinda just want to tell him, "hey I like you.." Maybe a kiss at the end of the night...

Embarrassment is something you grow out of as you get older. Nobody is watching. Steal a kiss from him during the date if he doesn't make a move. It can be done coyly. Don't wait until the end of the date. By then, the tension/awkwardness might be too much.

You only live once (unless you're a zombie/vampire), so Carpe Diem!

I'll have to pound a few drinks before. I overthink everything.

What're your thoughts on double texting?

Went on a tinder date with this girl. It went well and she even texted me after saying we should hang again and brought up going on a bike ride or a walk with her dog. I texted her a few days later asking about her weekend, thinking I'd segue the convo into making concrete plans. She didn't respond

Wat do?

How long has it been since she responded?

I don't trust women and none of them ever gave the feeling that I could let my guard down and just go for it. I'm not dating to get into a relationship. I'm dating to find the right match and so far I have not found it. If the stars align perfectly and it happens, great. Until then... I will not get attached. I will not let my guard down. I will not chase. I will not be controlled by the fear of loss.You don't have to force it. It will happen naturally if there is something there... at least it should.

You initiating and inviting him places IS you telling him that you like him. So if the date goes good and you want a kiss all you should have to do is lean in.

Dude I like is nervous wreck that over thinks everything like me. And yeah I will try to be natural.

Update..
Sooo he kinda chickened out in going. So I'm sitting on my couch with a beer in hand and bowl full of w**d. It's gonna be a great Friday evening!

strong this ^^

ill come smoke with you

also pondus, i compiled all your lessons years ago and have kept them on my phone's notes for when ever I feel the need to read them. thnx m8

Just wondering. Is nudge a way to get attention?

Sorry to hear that... still I find it incredibly admirable and awesome that you put yourself out there. Not many women do. Oh well. His loss.
Pass some of that bud over here

This section is great because it captures my exact attitude when it comes to dating. Repped

Last Thursday night after we hung out. Texted her again Monday and she didn't respond. Also think her bday was this week so she was probably busy with festivities but that's not really an excuse

Thanks! Glad NV is joining in...

I'm trying ya know. As I have always said dating, relationships, friendships, jobs, etc is a two way street.
Puff, puff, pass

What do you mean he chickened out? He flaked or he was scared?

I know I've cut women off 'too soon' also.
But I have principles that I stick by which is more important than trying to pick up every scrap of opportunity.

Well I don't want to give out too much information, but he didn't want to drive. The thing is I have to drive all the time when we meet up for something. I just think that he really didn't want to go nor hangout with me. A few months ago he was blowing up my phone and I was responsive. Now he's cold. IDK man... I just don't get how can a guy go from hot to cold in such a short amount of time.

sounds like he will hang out if you do all the work. So probably a guy who can wrap women around his fingers and doesn't have to put in the effort much.

(You have a little idea what dating is like for men now, welcome)

I've always know that dating is hard for both genders. The misc says it's easy for women, but it's not if you are looking for a relationship. It is easy to find meaningless sex.
The entire time I was in college I struggled with friendships and relationships. It seemed like everyone just wanted to have fun and not get into serious relationships. My own parents said that "you're too young for a BF, focus on school.." I did that and now it still seems like people just want to fcuk around and not take anything serious.

It's the catch 22. Girls want a guy with options. But a guy with options is very hard to get because he has options.
Atleast getting sex easily is better than getting neither easily.

Yeah. I think I'm just getting the point where I've gone out with so many women, I'm starting to question if I am doing something wrong. IE giving up too early or possibly even something else. Just trying to make sense of it.Didn't want to drive. The ONLY time I have ever given that excuse is because I was not interested enough to put in the effort. So, there's your answer.It is hard for both sides. Most of the women I go out with really have noting good to say about the men they have been dating. I don't really have all that much good to say either. I don't really have any bad experiences, it's just not working out. One thing is true though, as soon as they do find that person they feel good about, they will get into a relationship.

Update:

So the teacher did end up texting me back last night. Had some small chat and then she just stopped responding and then nothing today so, yeah. I'll stick with my gut. lol.

Ironically two women msged me on tinder today, so we'll see how that progresses.

Just finished getting ready to go out tonight with my date. Gonna hit up a couple whiskey bars and then maybe go dancing.

I think you'll notice that most male posters in this section do not want to just fcuk around - you'll have better luck with guys age 30+.

Also, the guy that bailed isn't interested - move on. And if he bailed at the last minute, don't tolerate that disrespect and meet him again.

I'm a little strange, but I prefer a guy that doesn't have a lot of options. I rather go for the dork than the football star, does that make sense? Men value beauty in women and I don't have that, so what's the point of me chasing the star athlete? I make up my low value in face for other things (working out, having a well paying job, etc). The men I have chased are still single according ******** years later, some have gained more weight, some still lives with their parents, etc. At this point WTF I do?