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Falling for a girl, but not sure if her (sexual) past is ‘decent/good’ ?
08-25-2020, 01:02 PM
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#31
- smashedurgfx10
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the reason everyone is quoting this '2' number OP is because its incredibly low
I have experience in different cultures, both having lived in the middle east, and dated girls from non western background.
Without asking where exactly she's from, I'm just gonna put it out there that women are women regardless of culture, and women will lie to protect the truth if it means they'll look bad in your eyes or that of the world.
The disparity of blowing 8 guys and only banging 2 is another thing which concerns me, it just doesn't seem plausible.
If you want to believe her go ahead, but me and many others here are trying to tell you it's probably higher than this. We aren't saying dont date her at all (because most girls would say a way higher number than 2 to begin with) but just go in with your eyes open and not selling yourself a fantasy that probably isnt true
you asked another guy 'how can you have a relationship with a woman if they are all liars'
people are liars my man. men and women, but about this particular topic - it's just a known fact that you won't get a truthful answer. If the girl likes you she's going to want you to think she is as pure as possible. If she doesn't like you, then she still wants you to think that because they don't want the world to judge them for being sexual. that's life and it's why i would never ask a woman this. because it'll just be a lie
she has probably had times she didn't include, which she rationalised away as 'not counting. such as 'i had zero feelings for the guy' or 'i was young' or something. so she's even selling HERSELF the fallacy.
I can have relationships with women, even if i know they lie, because im aware of it from the outset. That way i won't get burned down the road.
This girl is probably great. I have no reason to think she isn't. But sloots gonna sloot, culture is no exception (in 2020), and you'll never get a truthful answer about this. judge her on her actions rather than the number itself.
I have experience in different cultures, both having lived in the middle east, and dated girls from non western background.
Without asking where exactly she's from, I'm just gonna put it out there that women are women regardless of culture, and women will lie to protect the truth if it means they'll look bad in your eyes or that of the world.
The disparity of blowing 8 guys and only banging 2 is another thing which concerns me, it just doesn't seem plausible.
If you want to believe her go ahead, but me and many others here are trying to tell you it's probably higher than this. We aren't saying dont date her at all (because most girls would say a way higher number than 2 to begin with) but just go in with your eyes open and not selling yourself a fantasy that probably isnt true
you asked another guy 'how can you have a relationship with a woman if they are all liars'
people are liars my man. men and women, but about this particular topic - it's just a known fact that you won't get a truthful answer. If the girl likes you she's going to want you to think she is as pure as possible. If she doesn't like you, then she still wants you to think that because they don't want the world to judge them for being sexual. that's life and it's why i would never ask a woman this. because it'll just be a lie
she has probably had times she didn't include, which she rationalised away as 'not counting. such as 'i had zero feelings for the guy' or 'i was young' or something. so she's even selling HERSELF the fallacy.
I can have relationships with women, even if i know they lie, because im aware of it from the outset. That way i won't get burned down the road.
This girl is probably great. I have no reason to think she isn't. But sloots gonna sloot, culture is no exception (in 2020), and you'll never get a truthful answer about this. judge her on her actions rather than the number itself.
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08-25-2020, 01:14 PM
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#32
- Brosnbroccoli
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Originally Posted By littlemissy⏩
I don’t know how I would feel if it was reversed, and no, I’m not jealous.Would you feel any different if it were 8 ppl she slept with and 2 dinks she zucked? Probably should ask yourself what it is that you're really having an issue with. You jealous & want to be #9 dink being zuked or the #3 on her record?
To some chicks letting a person in them is more intimate than oral. So maybe that's this girl. fk if I know. That's my only guess on why her beej count is higher than body count. I can't relate, I'm a very selfish type. If there's a dink in my mouth chances are 100% I'm getting some dink too otherwise I wouldn't be doing anyone favors just to do them a favor.
Probably should just not bring up sexual any past if you can't handle whatever the answer is going to be.
To some chicks letting a person in them is more intimate than oral. So maybe that's this girl. fk if I know. That's my only guess on why her beej count is higher than body count. I can't relate, I'm a very selfish type. If there's a dink in my mouth chances are 100% I'm getting some dink too otherwise I wouldn't be doing anyone favors just to do them a favor.
Probably should just not bring up sexual any past if you can't handle whatever the answer is going to be.
I think the reason it bugs me is because I feel like there’s a disparity between how she is, acts, etc. and that she has had oral sex with 8 guys, one of them being 9 years older. It surprised me. When she told me she had only had sex with 2 people, it didn’t surprise me, even though the number is low for a 25 year old.
I appreciate your thoughts on why she might have had more oral than actual sex.
When girls ask me I can’t help but ask them “how about you?” afterwards. Whatever they have said hasn’t been more than a thought that flew by, until now.
Doesn't really sound like a chick that respects herself. Casual sex, Casual Bj's, and close with her guy friends. Sounds like a recipe for disaster. You'll always be disgusted by her past and you'll grow jealous of her dude friends real quick. Plus you're gonna have to deal with her mental baggage whilst trying to build a family. Strong pass on my part.
In my own experience, these kinda girls tend to have underlying issues especially if they are engaging in casual stuff. We all like sex sure but at some point self-control must kick in and if that little bell in your head isn't stopping you from sleeping with randos and blowing dudes 10 years older then us, then you must be defective. Also I remember my ex sleeping with one of her dude friends the day after we broke up.
This whole alpha male talk needs to stop. You need to find a girl that will not make you stress you over her. You're already stressing out over her past and her male buddies. You haven't even finished the honeymoon and you're already losing hairs over her. Please find a girl that will make you happy. Stress is normal in a relationship but this early on it's not a good sign.
Appreciate your thoughts, and that is also obviously the concerns I have.In my own experience, these kinda girls tend to have underlying issues especially if they are engaging in casual stuff. We all like sex sure but at some point self-control must kick in and if that little bell in your head isn't stopping you from sleeping with randos and blowing dudes 10 years older then us, then you must be defective. Also I remember my ex sleeping with one of her dude friends the day after we broke up.
This whole alpha male talk needs to stop. You need to find a girl that will not make you stress you over her. You're already stressing out over her past and her male buddies. You haven't even finished the honeymoon and you're already losing hairs over her. Please find a girl that will make you happy. Stress is normal in a relationship but this early on it's not a good sign.
Do you think my feelings towards her past will always be there? It seems to me like it’s something that could subside. The casual BJs is a worry though. However, I know she’s been in relationsships/seriously dating and still only had oral sex, so the 8 BJs is not necessarily casual BJs, and obviously there’s no casual sex.
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08-25-2020, 02:11 PM
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#33
- Briangumble
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By today's standards, in the year 2020, that type of past is very good. It's unlikely you'll find another girl that age with numbers that low. You had a very sheltered upbringing didn't you?
08-25-2020, 03:53 PM
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#34
- DBoyDaRealest
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I'd be more concerned that she is either straight lying to your face, or that only 2 guys wanted to and were able to bang her.
She's likely not that hot if you think she's telling the truth.
If you are a well adjusted male and you know what the dating scene looks like, you should be able to tell if she's lying. Assuming that she goes out for drinks, has a normal friend group etc.
If she's some weird loner and doesn't get out then maybe it's the truth.
Either way these conversations are extremely unproductive. You should only need to know deets as it relates to guys that might be in her life, whether that be work friends, classmates etc. For example, you'd want to know if she has banged this guy from work she gets lunch with sometimes.
Othewise, don't ask dont tell. You should always lie as well to women on this subject (dead srs).
Edit: I'm guessing you are a virgin or extremely unexperienced yourself. Most guys I know who have laid pipe on plenty of women don't get bothered by this.
She's likely not that hot if you think she's telling the truth.
If you are a well adjusted male and you know what the dating scene looks like, you should be able to tell if she's lying. Assuming that she goes out for drinks, has a normal friend group etc.
If she's some weird loner and doesn't get out then maybe it's the truth.
Either way these conversations are extremely unproductive. You should only need to know deets as it relates to guys that might be in her life, whether that be work friends, classmates etc. For example, you'd want to know if she has banged this guy from work she gets lunch with sometimes.
Othewise, don't ask dont tell. You should always lie as well to women on this subject (dead srs).
Edit: I'm guessing you are a virgin or extremely unexperienced yourself. Most guys I know who have laid pipe on plenty of women don't get bothered by this.
08-25-2020, 08:22 PM
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#35
- InsanePain11
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Didn't read the replies yet, but those numbers are low brahski compared to most girls that age. You realize all the hoeing that most girls do in the college years?... Most girls numbers are much higher except for a select few who only sleep with long term bf's. There are a few rare girls that sometimes have different morals/values and don't sleep around and party a lot, but they are very rare these days.. Honestly this girls numbers at 25 do not equal hoe status imo.. might be a good number actually, she has some good experience but not too much..
08-26-2020, 07:23 AM
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#36
- SoapKing
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lmao if you actually believe that she has only slept with 2 guys
it's more like 8-9 and probably sucked 14-15 cawks
have only met one girl that didn't drastically underplay her kill count... first she said she was a virgin when it was 2 and then later she admitted to it being 10+.
all women are sloots OP
it's more like 8-9 and probably sucked 14-15 cawks
have only met one girl that didn't drastically underplay her kill count... first she said she was a virgin when it was 2 and then later she admitted to it being 10+.
all women are sloots OP
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08-26-2020, 08:21 AM
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#37
- smashedurgfx10
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Originally Posted By SoapKing⏩
how did you know it was 2? mutual friends?lmao if you actually believe that she has only slept with 2 guys
it's more like 8-9 and probably sucked 14-15 cawks
have only met one girl that didn't drastically underplay her kill count...first she said she was a virgin when it was 2and then later she admitted to it being 10+.
all women are sloots OP
it's more like 8-9 and probably sucked 14-15 cawks
have only met one girl that didn't drastically underplay her kill count...first she said she was a virgin when it was 2and then later she admitted to it being 10+.
all women are sloots OP
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08-26-2020, 11:18 AM
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#38
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Originally Posted By MirinCanadian99⏩
Thanks man, really appreciate it (srs).I personally think your feelings for her past will always be there. You might be able to overlook them but at the back of your mind those feelings will always exist. But you should make your decision with all of the advice given. If you can't overlook her past just move on, but if you're able to overlook then tread carefully. She might reveal more from her past.
Also like the others have said, I doubt she only gave those dudes head and either way its degrading in my eyes.
Speaking from experience. (family related experience)
Also like the others have said, I doubt she only gave those dudes head and either way its degrading in my eyes.
Speaking from experience. (family related experience)
I will give it a few months and see if it just the initial shock or if I actually do have some deeper problem with her past, and whether that is because I’m insecure or otherwise. She’s really great, so a few months is worth it to see, in my opinion.
The reason I know she’s telling the truth is she lived in the South of Portugal, and I lived in Northern Europe a long time before we got this serious. There was 0% chance we would be anything, but we talked about this and that including who we were dating, she told me that she hadn’t lose her virginity etc... so unless you ****s believe she was lying about this YEARS prior to her moving to northern Europe for work, and me and her incidentally meeting each other and started to talk again... lmao. Nobody can be so calculated, and she had no reason to lie.
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08-26-2020, 12:06 PM
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#39
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What's your past like OP?
I was more insecure when I was younger and had less experience. Now there are more important things than body count. Personally, potential baggage from past partners is probably more detrimental than actual body count (ie "friends" with exes or hookups).
My last gf had 3 ex's. All now live in another city. Zero baggage. Twas great.
I was more insecure when I was younger and had less experience. Now there are more important things than body count. Personally, potential baggage from past partners is probably more detrimental than actual body count (ie "friends" with exes or hookups).
My last gf had 3 ex's. All now live in another city. Zero baggage. Twas great.
08-26-2020, 12:52 PM
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#40
- akmerle
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Originally Posted By Brosnbroccoli⏩
Lol, no reason to lie? Being judged by obsessive / insecure / jealous people is the exact reason why people lie about their sexual past.Thanks man, really appreciate it (srs).
I will give it a few months and see if it just the initial shock or if I actually do have some deeper problem with her past, and whether that is because I’m insecure or otherwise. She’s really great, so a few months is worth it to see, in my opinion.
The reason I know she’s telling the truth is she lived in the South of Portugal, and I lived in Northern Europe a long time before we got this serious. There was 0% chance we would be anything, but we talked about this and that including who we were dating, she told me that she hadn’t lose her virginity etc... so unless you ****s believe she was lying about this YEARS prior to her moving to northern Europe for work, and me and her incidentally meeting each other and started to talk again... lmao. Nobody can be so calculated, and she had no reason to lie.
I will give it a few months and see if it just the initial shock or if I actually do have some deeper problem with her past, and whether that is because I’m insecure or otherwise. She’s really great, so a few months is worth it to see, in my opinion.
The reason I know she’s telling the truth is she lived in the South of Portugal, and I lived in Northern Europe a long time before we got this serious. There was 0% chance we would be anything, but we talked about this and that including who we were dating, she told me that she hadn’t lose her virginity etc... so unless you ****s believe she was lying about this YEARS prior to her moving to northern Europe for work, and me and her incidentally meeting each other and started to talk again... lmao. Nobody can be so calculated, and she had no reason to lie.
You still havent answered the folks asking about your sexual past? Did you share yours with her? Were you honest with her about it?
Seriously, you have an answer and you cant change her past, be an adult and MOVE FORWARD before you even more self sabotage a potential great relationship.
08-26-2020, 02:19 PM
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#41
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Originally Posted By skinnyfat88⏩
Yeah that sounds like a mess to deal with.What's your past like OP?
I was more insecure when I was younger and had less experience. Now there are more important things than body count. Personally, potential baggage from past partners is probably more detrimental than actual body count (ie "friends" with exes or hookups).
My last gf had 3 ex's. All now live in another city. Zero baggage. Twas great.
I was more insecure when I was younger and had less experience. Now there are more important things than body count. Personally, potential baggage from past partners is probably more detrimental than actual body count (ie "friends" with exes or hookups).
My last gf had 3 ex's. All now live in another city. Zero baggage. Twas great.
I havn’t slept with plenty of women, but I’m definitely more experienced than her, so yes, I do hold her to different standard in this area than me.
Maybe it’s just that I havn’t slept with 30+ women and therefore lack the experience that some of you have, and that’s why it bothers me - I’m not sure.
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08-26-2020, 09:52 PM
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#42
- sam212
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How many women have you slept with OP to be so insecure about her 2 partners and 8 blowjoBs? If you have banged more than 5, then you should feel pretty secure.
I remember making a thread like this over 10 years ago in MISC about a woman I was dating who had slept with over 20 guys at 25. My notch count was about 5 or 6 at that time, I felt incredibly insecure and just crushed internally.
10 years later, I have indulged in extreme degeneracy since, and notch count has increased exponentially. At this point, I’m not concerned with a woman’s sexual past unless she was the towns bicycle or an actual whore. Doubt most women have indulged in the kind of hedonistic degeneracy as me.
Anyway, point is, if you have a significant notch count, you’re being a *******, if your notch count is not high, then it’s probably reasonable to feel insecure. If it’s bothering you this much, it’s time to break up. Otherwise, just focus on how she makes you feel and have fun.
I remember making a thread like this over 10 years ago in MISC about a woman I was dating who had slept with over 20 guys at 25. My notch count was about 5 or 6 at that time, I felt incredibly insecure and just crushed internally.
10 years later, I have indulged in extreme degeneracy since, and notch count has increased exponentially. At this point, I’m not concerned with a woman’s sexual past unless she was the towns bicycle or an actual whore. Doubt most women have indulged in the kind of hedonistic degeneracy as me.
Anyway, point is, if you have a significant notch count, you’re being a *******, if your notch count is not high, then it’s probably reasonable to feel insecure. If it’s bothering you this much, it’s time to break up. Otherwise, just focus on how she makes you feel and have fun.
08-27-2020, 11:18 AM
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#43
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Maybe focus on how great she is and the fact you found someone you really like to be around. This is so so hard to find in this day and age. Sex is obviously a big deal for her and who she lets inside her. Maybe social pressure or her own morals made her not want to sleep with many people. Believe in her until otherwise proven.
Some women and especially younger ones don’t mind giving oral sex because it satisfies the guy she likes without having to have sex with him. Guys can lay the pressure on pretty good and she obviously wasn’t comfortable having sex with them but a little fun was okay. Your GF is 25 and if you stay together she’ll one day be 40 and have only slept with 3 people. Maybe she enjoys oral sex both giving and receiving? If she does lucky you.
Also, what you’re doing in your mind is lining up 8 guys in a row and picturing her blowing them all. This is not how it happened. People came and went from her life at different times and she made harmless decisions.
I’d also be sceptical of the numbers. women don’t always “track” numbers for us men to judge them on. She told you she had sex with 2 people.. I’d be thankful to even find someone who’s reserved like this at age 25. For life in the back of your mind you have a woman who’s only been with 2 other guys. How lucky.
Some women and especially younger ones don’t mind giving oral sex because it satisfies the guy she likes without having to have sex with him. Guys can lay the pressure on pretty good and she obviously wasn’t comfortable having sex with them but a little fun was okay. Your GF is 25 and if you stay together she’ll one day be 40 and have only slept with 3 people. Maybe she enjoys oral sex both giving and receiving? If she does lucky you.
Also, what you’re doing in your mind is lining up 8 guys in a row and picturing her blowing them all. This is not how it happened. People came and went from her life at different times and she made harmless decisions.
I’d also be sceptical of the numbers. women don’t always “track” numbers for us men to judge them on. She told you she had sex with 2 people.. I’d be thankful to even find someone who’s reserved like this at age 25. For life in the back of your mind you have a woman who’s only been with 2 other guys. How lucky.
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08-27-2020, 12:54 PM
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#44
- Navillus13
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She should leave your insecure ass and come make my dink her 9th.
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08-27-2020, 03:13 PM
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#45
- Mr Beer
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Seems like a complete non-issue and something you probably want to get past OP, because you are going down a path where you are only going to pair with total weirdos or habitual liars.
EDIT
Also seems like weirdly specific information to obtain from a woman, like I know my wife had 3 boyfriends before me but I never spent any time trying to find out exactly what she did with them in bed and how many dicks lifetime.
EDIT
Also seems like weirdly specific information to obtain from a woman, like I know my wife had 3 boyfriends before me but I never spent any time trying to find out exactly what she did with them in bed and how many dicks lifetime.
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08-28-2020, 01:01 AM
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#46
- billclintonnn
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I’ll never understand women who claim to blown a guy, but it didn’t proceed to sex. It’s either a lie or she was blowing a total cuck because I immediately push it to sex after.
I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky. I never told anybody to lie, not a single time; never. These allegations are false. And I need to go back to work for the American people. Thank you.
08-28-2020, 02:09 AM
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#47
Originally Posted By NosyJossie⏩
this.guys, stop asking a womans past. if she asks for yours, its none of her business. whats in the past is in the past. most important is she is with you now. when you slap them walls no need to put images in you head. just enjoy it.
opie, you are confused. at 15 a girl will usually have two partners.
08-28-2020, 03:10 AM
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#48
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Originally Posted By billclintonnn⏩
Why push for sex if you just come in her mouth? I mean if I'm really feeling her but otherwise I now have better things to do. Like cuddle her a bit first to be polite and then go shower/eat/pub/whatever.I’ll never understand women who claim to blown a guy, but it didn’t proceed to sex. It’s either a lie or she was blowing a total cuck because I immediately push it to sex after.
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08-28-2020, 03:32 AM
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#49
- smashedurgfx10
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Originally Posted By Mr
i'd rather come inside her assuming she was on bcWhy push for sex if you just come in her mouth? I mean if I'm really feeling her but otherwise I now have better things to do. Like cuddle her a bit first to be polite and then go shower/eat/pub/whatever.
and if she wasn't, i'd still rather smash her and pull out - as opposed to just getting my dick sucked only
coming in mouth is fun but if it's the only thing im gonna do with a girl it just feels unfinished
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08-28-2020, 04:37 AM
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#50
08-28-2020, 07:53 AM
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#51
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Originally Posted By Fang2⏩
fixedDon't fall in love with a broad.
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