Log In

Your email is not your username

Register

If you were a member of the old Bodybuilding.com forums and would like to reuse your previous username, you can request it below. We use your email only for registration and do not store it. For more information, please see our Privacy Policy.

Confirm your email

A registration code was sent to your email. Enter it here.

Welcome

You have successfully setup your account.

Sign in

Quick Navigation Bottom Misc
Forum » More General Categories » Relationships and Relationships Help » Vick's Dating Log (v. 2.0) and Miscellaneous Advice
  1. Results 151 to 180 of 2563
  2. Page 6 of 86
  3. First
  5. 4
  6. 5
  7. 6
  8. 7
  9. 8
  11. Last

Thread: Vick's Dating Log (v. 2.0) and Miscellaneous Advice

post 1481842181 02-02-2017, 12:26 PM
-
#151
  1. US_Ranger
  2. Registered User
  1. US_Ranger
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Apr 2005
  4. Location: California, United States
  5. Age: 44
  6. Posts: 32,182
  7. Rep Power: 120822
Originally Posted By xvicknumber7x⏩
Wow, I go to lunch for an hour and there's an entire page to catch up on. Nice.

I'm not going to go back and quote, etc. but psycho, stop being so defensive. I never once made a statement about how I view you or anything like that. I'm simply giving you my point of view on things given the situation I've been handed. If you don't like it, then don't ask me for advice or PM me. It's that simple. However, I never once called you specifically needy or desperate or anything like that, so don't put words in my mouth. I said one of your specific actions could have been viewed as needy, and that's all. We're all brahs here.

Daisy, you need to realize that the way you speak openly and handle yourself is way, way different than most American women. It is the American woman's modus operandi to say one thing and do the complete polar opposite. Your experience with your new guy is completely rare and not typical of a regular interaction when you meet a new female as a Western man. That's why this all sounds so foreign to you.
Lol, this isn't even real life. This is the same chick that literally made a post (probably deleted it too) about how game playing is a biological advantage to women in the evolution of dating. I'm pretty sure it was in your old thread too. Don't have such selective memory. Posting patterns of people in here should show you whether or not they love the drama of game playing or not. Just lol.
Originally Posted By Nedo⏩
Just have fun with it bro. She is doing this to take all the power as she may suspect you are a leader. Play the game right back and just take her less seriously. If you connect well on the dates, this should stop. You just make sure you are also delaying texts, this is also one way to get it to stop.
Nah. I stopped taking her seriously the second she started doing it. I'm not posting it to show I care, I'm just using it as an example of what to expect in modern dating. This is my first day off in 10 days so I'm actually enjoying cleaning up, doing laundry, getting crap done, etc. I'm too busy to worry about what this rando is doing with his game playing. Zero fcks given and I'm not going to entertain it.
post 1481842401 02-02-2017, 12:28 PM
-
#152
  1. xvicknumber7x
  2. therapist (srs)
  1. xvicknumber7x
  2. therapist (srs)
  3. Join Date: Jan 2008
  4. Location: United States
  5. Posts: 17,981
  6. Rep Power: 30593
See Daisy, what you're saying makes sense, however in practice it just doesn't work that way. That's why we have to resort to making you guys twist in the wind when you send a text message or whatever. Because the heart of gold approach only works on 1/100 women.
post 1481842461 02-02-2017, 12:29 PM
-
#153
  1. pondus_levo
  2. mic dropper
  1. pondus_levo
  2. mic dropper
  3. Join Date: Oct 2006
  4. Location: United States
  5. Posts: 24,811
  6. Rep Power: 163138
Originally Posted By daisygirl713⏩
Look, I know what it feels like to play games. To not feel safe enough with a man to let my guard down and be myself.

The main reason I like my guy so much is because right from the start, we were ourselves. No pretenses, no BS.
He's the first guy in YEARS that enabled me to not worry about the insecurity and craziness that comes with game playing. It means so much to me.
Ok, I agree with your point about 'sh!t tests' but those live on a spectrum. Some women mask them in massive soap opera set ups; others just integrate them in their daily lives and see if the guy fits in. Not sure the two can even be compared as 'sh!t tests', because the former is undeniably one, but the latter is simply getting to know someone.

ok, so how do we do that? what do we look for and watch out for?
That's wonderful daisy. I bet you **** test him on the daily to be sure he really is who he says he is and he is constantly passing those tests, which is why you feel so comfortable. Like I said, **** tests are rarely conscious!

I don't play games either and I expect the women I date to not play games. Do you think I'm a game player because I have all this knowledge? No, my having all this knowledge prevents me and the woman I date from having to play games. When it comes down to it, all this non-sense song and dance show that is being interpreted as being "playing games," is actually a result of poor verbal communication and misinterpretation of non-verbal communication. Most people have poor verbal communication skills and suck bawls and interpreting non-verbal communication.

One thing you should know about men, is that we experience love through respect. Men need to push women's emotional buttons, women need to push men's respect buttons. We don't pick up on most of these subtle little emotional base actions and words you throw at us. You need to me more direct.

Guys, let this also be a lesson to you. Women do not fall in love with you because you show them respect. Which is why you can't use direct, logic based actions to show them you care. You have to use subtle emotional based actions and words.
Forever alone? Attraction and keeping the girl chasing you - http://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=131498033

You will never know your limits, unless you push yourself past the imaginary lines you have drawn in the sand.

Knee Dragger - '06 GSX-R750
post 1481843521 02-02-2017, 12:35 PM
-
#154
  1. xvicknumber7x
  2. therapist (srs)
  1. xvicknumber7x
  2. therapist (srs)
  3. Join Date: Jan 2008
  4. Location: United States
  5. Posts: 17,981
  6. Rep Power: 30593
Originally Posted By US_Ranger⏩
Lol, this isn't even real life. This is the same chick that literally made a post (probably deleted it too) about how game playing is a biological advantage to women in the evolution of dating. I'm pretty sure it was in your old thread too. Don't have such selective memory. Posting patterns of people in here should show you whether or not they love the drama of game playing or not. Just lol.
With all due respect man, I can't even remember what I had for dinner a few nights ago.
post 1481843881 02-02-2017, 12:37 PM
-
#155
  1. US_Ranger
  2. Registered User
  1. US_Ranger
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Apr 2005
  4. Location: California, United States
  5. Age: 44
  6. Posts: 32,182
  7. Rep Power: 120822
Originally Posted By xvicknumber7x⏩
With all due respect man, I can't even remember what I had for dinner a few nights ago.
Chicken breast, asparagus and that favorite rice dish you always like to make. (no stalker) (no homo)
post 1481844161 02-02-2017, 12:39 PM
-
#156
  1. Nedo
  2. Registered User
  1. Nedo
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Dec 2005
  4. Age: 41
  5. Posts: 9,105
  6. Rep Power: 8843
Originally Posted By daisygirl713⏩
yes, you are right...but i don't LIKE to feel that way. i like knowing where i stand with someone, and that they like and appreciate me. i don't like being around someone who i have to prove myself to...it's not a very comfortable feeling. i honestly would say, if you find the right person, you can discard all this BS and just have fun being free and being authentically you. the less you have to think about how to act around someone, the better.
There you have it brahs, confirmation of effectiveness from scrumptious herself. The hotter the woman is, the more reason you should have to do this chit, srs lol. Remember, men look up to ger like god, worshipping the ground she walks on, constantly messaging her, etc. This is why she is shook by a guy like me, because she ain't used to feeling like that so she doesn't know how to react. What does this make her do? Sometimes they turn beta and are putty in your hands, especially when highly interested.

Of course you don't like to feel that way Dais, who does like being mind fuked lol. Thankfully for you, you are aware.
post 1481845991 02-02-2017, 12:50 PM
-
#157
  1. Jhalf
  2. Registered BAMF
  1. Jhalf
  2. Registered BAMF
  3. Join Date: Apr 2010
  4. Location: Virginia, United States
  5. Posts: 7,119
  6. Rep Power: 25809
Originally Posted By Nedo⏩
Thanks for opinions. I will give some justification for my madness. I am aggressive because this is online dating. My experience has shown that if you don't stimulate her early and often, she may consider you boring and ghost. This is why I bring the heat early and often, otherwise I am taking a risk when the odds could be in my favour. I will add, this is the only online woman who has ghosted me for being cocky (coincidence, she is also the hottest to date and above me in looks scale) the rest ate it up and gave it back.

You mentioned too much at once; I'm not seeing how I could have effectively elaborated on the pic joke and restaurants (which would be considered boring convo to carry on IMO and is more reserved for IRL, not to mention I don't do dinner on first dates). She also gave a very vague answer in terms of the restaurants which didn't give me much to go on (poor convo skills on her end).

Women want to be entertained, especially her who just sat back and waited for a show so I gave it to her. Afterall, she has 200 messages waiting, remember? Even if it does seem like too much at once, it got her laughing, the change is not abrupt, it flows. You can thank nouning for that. Same thing IRL, I poke at her at any opportunity although I find witty ideas don't come to mind as easy so it is less frequent.

If I didn't make her feel like chit about not knowing how to cook, she may have been in the bag. Even Daisy ate it up (thanks cupcake).

The other thing is, everyone's writing style is different and we all have our own preference. The only thing I would critique about your style Pondus is the filler convo parts, whereas you suggested I do more of this. This attests, we approach with a different writing style/game. As I said, the filler convo is a risk to me so I play my cards with the more sure bet and bring the heat (consistent sarcasm). To each their own I guess, thanks for the critique bruh.
Ned, how many girls have you slept with?

Accidentally wandered in here from main misc page, and wtf is going on
MISC Strength Crew
post 1481846891 02-02-2017, 12:56 PM
-
#158
  1. daisygirl713
  2. Registered User
  1. daisygirl713
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Jul 2012
  4. Posts: 4,212
  5. Rep Power: 69436
Originally Posted By xvicknumber7x⏩
See Daisy, what you're saying makes sense, however in practice it just doesn't work that way. That's whywe have to resort to making you guys twist in the wind when you send a text message or whatever. Because the heart of gold approach only works on 1/100 women.
ughhh that sucksi feel like i'm way too sensitive to handle that. when i really like someone, i'm all in. everything and anything they do really affects me. game playing is fcking torture

looking back, the few guys i really fell for were all heart of gold, no game playing types. i'd probably always seek out those personalities cuz game playing legit drives me insane
Originally Posted By pondus_levo⏩
That's wonderful daisy. I bet you **** test him on the daily to be sure he really is who he says he is and he is constantly passing those tests, which is why you feel so comfortable. Like I said, **** tests are rarely conscious!
lmao u bet, eh? how so...
One thing you should know about men, is that we experience love through respect.
can u expand?
Guys, let this also be a lesson to you.Women do not fall in love with you because you show them respect. Which is why you can't use direct, logic based actions to show them you care.You have to use subtle emotional based actions and words.
i would tweak this and say it's both. i could never love someone who didn't respect me. i also wouldn't love someone who didn't illustrate that they care. the golden trio of love is respect, trust and loyalty. you need all 3 [regardless of gender] to reach love.
for instance, take my guy. i'm very verbally expressive, but he's not...at all. how does he show he cares? through actions. if i don't know how to do something, he'll immediately step in and help. he'll take care of things that i am clueless about. he makes me feel safe and cared for. i don't have a sh!t ton of words to go on, but i have his actions...which speak loud and clear. sometimes, he works 17 hour days, and he still takes a minute to text me when he's finally home and ask if we can hang out sometime this week. that means so much so me!
i'm learning how to understand his 'love language'...random but i read about this term called the 'hemingway man'..someone who is more stoic, non expressive, but nonetheless deep feeling. i think my guy is like that. i can see he cares through what he does. he just isn't 'wordy' about it.
Originally Posted By Nedo⏩
There you have it brahs, confirmation of effectiveness from scrumptious herself. The hotter the woman is, the more reason you should have to do this chit, srs lol. Remember, men look up to ger like god, worshipping the ground she walks on, constantly messaging her, etc. This is why she is shook by a guy like me, because she ain't used to feeling like that so she doesn't know how to react. What does this make her do? Sometimes they turn beta and are putty in your hands, especially when highly interested.

Of course you don't like to feel that way Dais, who does like being mind fuked lol. Thankfully for you, you are aware.
You forget that no matter how attractive, every one is human. And each one of us is vulnerable to falling for one person and being totally attached to them, for better or for worse. Say a girl had a sh!t ton of DMs on instagram...so what? She's probably never read them or even accepted them. Same goes with online dating. But I can damn well bet she's checking her phone constantly for that ONE TEXT from that ONE GUY.

It's human nature. If you really like someone, they're it. That's all you see. And if you have the chance that someone else feels the same about you, try to avoid games. You are a good guy and I find you much more likable when you discard the idiotic 'pitch' and you're just freely, wholly yourself.
7:1
post 1481847291 02-02-2017, 12:58 PM
-
#159
  1. xvicknumber7x
  2. therapist (srs)
  1. xvicknumber7x
  2. therapist (srs)
  3. Join Date: Jan 2008
  4. Location: United States
  5. Posts: 17,981
  6. Rep Power: 30593
Originally Posted By daisygirl713⏩
ughhh that sucksi feel like i'm way too sensitive to handle that. when i really like someone, i'm all in. everything and anything they do really affects me. game playing is fcking torture.
That's why you have what you have now. You were direct and up front about things and found a guy who could appreciate it.

Many of us would appreciate it if that's what we got. The thing about it is, we don't. That's all I am saying. Many women don't handle their business like you do. They want attention from literally all over the place and don't want commitment.
post 1481847691 02-02-2017, 01:01 PM
-
#160
  1. psychosylocibin
  2. Registered User
  1. psychosylocibin
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Jul 2007
  4. Location: United States
  5. Age: 40
  6. Posts: 3,653
  7. Rep Power: 10708
Originally Posted By xvicknumber7x⏩
That's why you have what you have now. You were direct and up front about things and found a guy who could appreciate it.

Many of us would appreciate it if that's what we got. The thing about it is, we don't. That's all I am saying. Many women don't handle their business like you do. They want attention from literally all over the place and don't want commitment.
this.


Originally Posted By xvicknumber7x⏩
I'm not going to go back and quote, etc. but psycho, stop being so defensive. I never once made a statement about how I view you or anything like that. I'm simply giving you my point of view on things given the situation I've been handed. If you don't like it, then don't ask me for advice or PM me. It's that simple. However, I never once called you specifically needy or desperate or anything like that, so don't put words in my mouth. I said one of your specific actions could have been viewed as needy, and that's all. We're all brahs here.
it came across as my actions being needy, right. it is more what pondus is saying. but like you said, it is what it is. on to the next one
-Max Squat drops from 415 to 200 after going 1 degree past 90 degree knee bend crew.
post 1481849791 02-02-2017, 01:15 PM
-
#161
  1. pondus_levo
  2. mic dropper
  1. pondus_levo
  2. mic dropper
  3. Join Date: Oct 2006
  4. Location: United States
  5. Posts: 24,811
  6. Rep Power: 163138
Originally Posted By psychosylocibin⏩
this.

it came across as my actions being needy, right. it is more what pondus is saying. but like you said, it is what it is. on to the next one
I never said you were needy, bro. I said you became a chump.
Forever alone? Attraction and keeping the girl chasing you - http://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=131498033

You will never know your limits, unless you push yourself past the imaginary lines you have drawn in the sand.

Knee Dragger - '06 GSX-R750
post 1481850131 02-02-2017, 01:17 PM
-
#162
  1. daisygirl713
  2. Registered User
  1. daisygirl713
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Jul 2012
  4. Posts: 4,212
  5. Rep Power: 69436
Originally Posted By xvicknumber7x⏩
That's why you have what you have now. You were direct and up front about things and found a guy who could appreciate it.

Many of us would appreciate it if that's what we got. The thing about it is, we don't. That's all I am saying. Many women don't handle their business like you do. They want attention from literally all over the place and don't want commitment.
Thank you for thisIt makes me smile and I appreciate your kind observations.

I really am grateful to have reconnected with him. I sometimes have to pinch myself after reading everyone else's stories of such difficulty & struggle in the dating game...that it could be so straightforward. Not gonna lie, it honestly scares me a bit, the potential of something inevitably fcking up, because it's so good right now. It's hard not to let my guard shoot right back up as a way to self-protect from that possibility...I consciously talk myself out of it on the daily lol.
7:1
post 1481854211 02-02-2017, 01:41 PM
-
#163
  1. FU3L
  2. Nah mean, jelly bean?
  1. FU3L
  2. Nah mean, jelly bean?
  3. Join Date: Jan 2009
  4. Location: Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada
  5. Age: 38
  6. Posts: 24,530
  7. Rep Power: 34599
I don't know about you guys but I just cannot take a woman seriously who chit tests. It's a sign of immaturity and an instant turn off for me. I bring honesty, respect and integrity to the table and expect the same out of whoever I am dating. I'm not interested in a relationship based on game playing to maintain attraction.

I don't know if it's a location thing or what but judging by the dating logs/experiences of you American brahs, American women are far pickier, weirder, crazier and have bigger egos than Canadian women.
The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it.
post 1481855651 02-02-2017, 01:50 PM
-
#164
  1. psychosylocibin
  2. Registered User
  1. psychosylocibin
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Jul 2007
  4. Location: United States
  5. Age: 40
  6. Posts: 3,653
  7. Rep Power: 10708
Originally Posted By FU3L⏩
I don't know about you guys but I just cannot take a woman seriously who chit tests. It's a sign of immaturity and an instant turn off for me. I bring honesty, respect and integrity to the table and expect the same out of whoever I am dating. I'm not interested in a relationship based on game playing to maintain attraction.

I don't know if it's a location thing or what but judging by the dating logs/experiences of you American brahs, American women are far pickier, weirder, crazier and have bigger egos than Canadian women.
This is my stance. If chit tests are a way a women sub-conciously assesses a mans' value, they are not doing it right. A women getting turned off because you always agree with her = good chit test. A women getting turned off because you text a wall of text and she barely responds = a good chit test. A women that gets turned off because you texted her once the day after sexing her = terrible chit test.

It definetely is an american women thing. I think pondus/nedo/vick may take the "it is what it is" approach and adapt to the situation, and not take a principled approach. I hate acting based on "the situation", I take more of a principled approach. The question is, do I change my behavior to a non principled approach in order to attract women or do I remain the same and try to find that 1 in 100 girl that doesn't care if you text or call her the next day after sex/etc.

I like getting my dick wet, but I also want a relationship
-Max Squat drops from 415 to 200 after going 1 degree past 90 degree knee bend crew.
post 1481858721 02-02-2017, 02:10 PM
-
#165
  1. xvicknumber7x
  2. therapist (srs)
  1. xvicknumber7x
  2. therapist (srs)
  3. Join Date: Jan 2008
  4. Location: United States
  5. Posts: 17,981
  6. Rep Power: 30593
Originally Posted By psychosylocibin⏩
It definetely is an american women thing. I think pondus/nedo/vick may take the "it is what it is" approach and adapt to the situation, and not take a principled approach. I hate acting based on "the situation", I take more of a principled approach. The question is, do I change my behavior to a non principled approach in order to attract women or do I remain the same and try to find that 1 in 100 girl that doesn't care if you text or call her the next day after sex/etc.
That's more or less the approach I take. Women are low on my priority list as it is and if that is the resistance I'm going to get then I can just let it go. I've had women make it easy on me in the past and these are the women I've been in long and awesome relationships with. Everything else is just what I feel like one has to go through to reach that point.
post 1481860841 02-02-2017, 02:25 PM
-
#166
  1. Luc1fer
  1. Luc1fer
  3. Join Date: Jun 2014
  4. Posts: 45,573
  5. Rep Power: 685731
Originally Posted By xvicknumber7x⏩
That's why you have what you have now. You were direct and up front about things and found a guy who could appreciate it.

Many of us would appreciate it if that's what we got. The thing about it is, we don't. That's all I am saying. Many women don't handle their business like you do. They want attention from literally all over the place and don't want commitment.
What's your game playing strategy (waiting to contact etc) - quid pro quo or automatic?

Maybe you're losing women like Daisy because of those games?

I told my gf on the FIRST date that I wanted to date her exclusively. That goes completely against you and Pondus rules.
Except she later said it was a significant plus that gave me the edge over most guys.
𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖘𝖊 𝖆 𝖈𝖍𝖊𝖈𝕶, 𝖓𝖊𝖛𝖊𝖗 𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖘𝖊 𝖆 𝖇𝖎𝖙𝖈𝖍

█▓▒▒░░🧵Make trolls invisible: https://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=180234573 ░░▒▒▓█
post 1481862971 02-02-2017, 02:38 PM
-
#167
  1. xvicknumber7x
  2. therapist (srs)
  1. xvicknumber7x
  2. therapist (srs)
  3. Join Date: Jan 2008
  4. Location: United States
  5. Posts: 17,981
  6. Rep Power: 30593
Originally Posted By Luc1fer⏩
What's your game playing strategy (waiting to contact etc) - quid pro quo or automatic?

Maybe you're losing women like Daisy because of those games?

I told my gf on the FIRST date that I wanted to date her exclusively. That goes completely against you and Pondus rules.
Except she later said it was a significant plus that gave me the edge over most guys.
Oh, trust me, I haven't met a woman like daisy since my last girlfriend.

Give me an example and I will tell you how I would play it. If we remember Girl 9 from my last thread, we went on a great date and I got a hold of her the next day later in the day because I incorrectly evaluated her as a girl who did not play these sorts of games. And she ended up ghosting me later that week. I usually go on a case by case basis, really. Sometimes it's the day after, sometimes a few days later, dependent on interest level.

Also you are about 10 years older than me and I am absolutely positive that plays a part in how these women you correspond with think and act, assuming you are dealing with women over the age of 25 or so.

For reference, in July I met a woman on an airplane and using straightforward game, I got her to fly back to where I live from where she lived a month after the flight we took and she ended up staying here for an entire weekend with me. That would never, ever work on someone 25 or lower. She was 30. It's just a different game the older they get and I'd say if they are under 28ish, you really need to act like you simply give no fuucks whether they come or go at many points before getting involved with them.

I would never, ever tell a woman I wanted to date her exclusively on the first date. And that's not due to any of my rules that I follow. I just think that is way too hasty and borderline foolish. But to each their own, you obviously knew what you were doing and that takes balls.
post 1481868981 02-02-2017, 03:22 PM
-
#168
  1. Luc1fer
  1. Luc1fer
  3. Join Date: Jun 2014
  4. Posts: 45,573
  5. Rep Power: 685731
Originally Posted By xvicknumber7x⏩
I would never, ever tell a woman I wanted to date her exclusively on the first date. And that's not due to any of my rules that I follow. I just think that is way too hasty and borderline foolish. But to each their own, you obviously knew what you were doing and that takes balls.
Ok, the age thing makes sense I guess. Here's how I see it, I know what I want and I know what I'll tolerate. I don't buy into multi-dating (I despise the modern dating scene), I believe in dating one person exclusively and giving it a fair chance before moving on. If she doesn't agree, she can move on too. Saves us both time.

I think the confusion here is about delivery. I communicate my dating requirements quickly, not necessarily specifying her. It isn't a desperate act of oh-I-don't-wanna-lose-you; it's - I'm not going to be another chump option and I believe in giving things a decent chance to succeed if things go well.
𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖘𝖊 𝖆 𝖈𝖍𝖊𝖈𝕶, 𝖓𝖊𝖛𝖊𝖗 𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖘𝖊 𝖆 𝖇𝖎𝖙𝖈𝖍

█▓▒▒░░🧵Make trolls invisible: https://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=180234573 ░░▒▒▓█
post 1481870321 02-02-2017, 03:32 PM
-
#169
  1. xvicknumber7x
  2. therapist (srs)
  1. xvicknumber7x
  2. therapist (srs)
  3. Join Date: Jan 2008
  4. Location: United States
  5. Posts: 17,981
  6. Rep Power: 30593
Originally Posted By Luc1fer⏩
Ok, the age thing makes sense I guess. Here's how I see it, I know what I want and I know what I'll tolerate. I don't buy into multi-dating (I despise the modern dating scene), I believe in dating one person exclusively and giving it a fair chance before moving on. If she doesn't agree, she can move on too. Saves us both time.

I think the confusion here is about delivery. I communicate my dating requirements quickly, not necessarily specifying her. It isn't a desperate act of oh-I-don't-wanna-lose-you; it's - I'm not going to be another chump option and I believe in giving things a decent chance to succeed if things go well.
I screen for those things myself instead of getting the word from them. I do this because it's what works for me. In my mind, people can say whatever. It's what theydothat I pay attention to. I don't want to hear them say they agree with what I am saying and what I want, etc. I want to see them do it and show it without being prompted. If I don't see at least enough to show me that they have what I want, then I'm out.

I'd rather see for myself and have them show me who they are and then go from there. I want to get to the point where I ask myself the question: is this someone I want to pursue? Why? And then have it be answered through their actions.
post 1481874911 02-02-2017, 04:06 PM
-
#170
  1. psychosylocibin
  2. Registered User
  1. psychosylocibin
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Jul 2007
  4. Location: United States
  5. Age: 40
  6. Posts: 3,653
  7. Rep Power: 10708
Originally Posted By xvicknumber7x⏩
That's more or less the approach I take. Women are low on my priority list as it is and if that is the resistance I'm going to get then I can just let it go. I've had women make it easy on me in the past and these are the women I've been in long and awesome relationships with. Everything else is just what I feel like one has to go through to reach that point.
Yeah, let the women do the work for you. But you still have to plant the seed, either through improving yourself and game in order for them to take interest first. You can't just sit back and 'have them come to you".

Curious to see you test this "hang back and let them come" theory in this thread!
-Max Squat drops from 415 to 200 after going 1 degree past 90 degree knee bend crew.
post 1481876131 02-02-2017, 04:19 PM
-
#171
  1. bassinyoface
  2. Think B I G
  1. bassinyoface
  2. Think B I G
  3. Join Date: Jun 2008
  4. Location: Ontario, Canada
  5. Age: 37
  6. Posts: 1,764
  7. Rep Power: 1517
Firstly, holy crapola I cannot keep up with the amount of posts and quoting in here!

Also, Daisy, you sound so legit that I WISH I could meet a girl like you. You really are a rarity in the culture of today's young women (and men too I should probably include, who usually try to mirror women's behaviour which makes it a giant cycle of sh!t) and you should understand that. Most of what you post, seems like you're surprised at what some of the fellas in here describe as the behaviour of women they encounter. This stuff seems foreign to you (which is great!!) so obviously you're friends are pretty legit too. Send em all our ways if ya can! haha
Originally Posted By FU3L⏩
I don't know about you guys but I just cannot take a woman seriously who chit tests. It's a sign of immaturity and an instant turn off for me. I bring honesty, respect and integrity to the table and expect the same out of whoever I am dating. I'm not interested in a relationship based on game playing to maintain attraction.

I don't know if it's a location thing or what but judging by the dating logs/experiences of you American brahs, American women are far pickier, weirder, crazier and have bigger egos than Canadian women.
I dunno brah, maybe on the East coast where you are it is like that. I hear that people on the east coast are more laid back, friendly, homely, etc. so I feel like that would reflect in the women and their behaviour as well. Here in Toronto, or the city/burbs it's exactly like what these Ameri-Brahs experience. In fact I would wager that Toronto is one of the most ragingly Liberal cities on the planet and its definitely a woman's world here (if ya know what I mean, think feminazi agendas embedded into everythingggggg). I have read and seen articles online, on mens sites and even in newspapers that says Toronto is the hotbed for Liberalism, and also one of, if not THE WORST place for single men trying to find dateable women and/or long term relationships..for what thats worth!

Speaking of the Maritimes...been trying to get a fishing trip going to the east coast for the past two summers but been too busy with working jobs! Looks beautiful out there!
90kg Powerlifter
Livin the dream working for the GDFD
MISC CIGAR CREW
CheekyChris23 crew
post 1481876801 02-02-2017, 04:23 PM
-
#172
  1. psychosylocibin
  2. Registered User
  1. psychosylocibin
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Jul 2007
  4. Location: United States
  5. Age: 40
  6. Posts: 3,653
  7. Rep Power: 10708
Originally Posted By bassinyoface⏩
Firstly, holy crapola I cannot keep up with the amount of posts and quoting in here!

Also, Daisy, you sound so legit that I WISH I could meet a girl like you. You really are a rarity in the culture of today's young women (and men too I should probably include, who usually try to mirror women's behaviour which makes it a giant cycle of sh!t) and you should understand that. Most of what you post, seems like you're surprised at what some of the fellas in here describe as the behaviour of women they encounter. This stuff seems foreign to you (which is great!!) so obviously you're friends are pretty legit too. Send em all our ways if ya can! haha
!
Second this! It blow my mind at the behavoir of so many women as well. It's like they operate at a completely different emotional wavelength when it comes to relationships and sex. I cannot fathom how some girls can pull 180's and ghost etc, because I cannot imagine myself doing that, what kind of emotional rollercoaster I would have to possess to do something like that.
-Max Squat drops from 415 to 200 after going 1 degree past 90 degree knee bend crew.
post 1481877111 02-02-2017, 04:26 PM
-
#173
  1. bassinyoface
  2. Think B I G
  1. bassinyoface
  2. Think B I G
  3. Join Date: Jun 2008
  4. Location: Ontario, Canada
  5. Age: 37
  6. Posts: 1,764
  7. Rep Power: 1517
Originally Posted By psychosylocibin⏩
Second this! It blow my mind at the behavoir of so many women as well. It's like they operate at a completely different emotional wavelength when it comes to relationships and sex. I cannot fathom how some girls can pull 180's and ghost etc, because I cannot imagine myself doing that, what kind of emotional rollercoaster I would have to possess to do something like that.
alot of douchey guys do it too...it is of my most humble opinion that most young men these days are also honourless, spineless, **** talking wimps who don't have the cajones to be straight forward with women they aren't interested in as well. It is RAMPANT in women, but I feel its more a cultural thing in our younger generation perpetuated by attitudes encourage by crappy TV shows, instagram memes, ******** posts, online dating apps, and stupid unintelligent music

my 0.02c
90kg Powerlifter
Livin the dream working for the GDFD
MISC CIGAR CREW
CheekyChris23 crew
post 1481878471 02-02-2017, 04:38 PM
-
#174
  1. pondus_levo
  2. mic dropper
  1. pondus_levo
  2. mic dropper
  3. Join Date: Oct 2006
  4. Location: United States
  5. Posts: 24,811
  6. Rep Power: 163138
Originally Posted By psychosylocibin⏩
This is my stance. If chit tests are a way a women sub-conciously assesses a mans' value, they are not doing it right. A women getting turned off because you always agree with her = good chit test. A women getting turned off because you text a wall of text and she barely responds = a good chit test. A women that gets turned off because you texted her once the day after sexing her = terrible chit test.

It definetely is an american women thing. I think pondus/nedo/vick may take the "it is what it is" approach and adapt to the situation, and not take a principled approach. I hate acting based on "the situation", I take more of a principled approach. The question is, do I change my behavior to a non principled approach in order to attract women or do I remain the same and try to find that 1 in 100 girl that doesn't care if you text or call her the next day after sex/etc.

I like getting my dick wet, but I also want a relationship
LOL at thinking we lack principle. Just because we know how to pass **** tests doesn't mean we put up with their ****. Get it through your head. A woman will **** test you if you lackcongruence. Your first date ended in sex and probably leaving you with high value. Something happened after the fact that lowered your value. None of us know what that might have been, only you can speculate. I highly doubt it was just because you msged her first the next day. My guess is you became too available without continuing to push her emotional buttons.

Her **** test was to re-evaluate your value and you failed.This is not something she pre-meditated!**** tests are an emotional response to something not making sense in her logical mind. Failing the tests proved to her that you are actually low value. You couldn't deal with everything not being perfect on the second date. What you don't realize, is that you could have stood up for your principles and still passed her **** test. In fact, that would have been the only way to prove to her that you were high value. You stood up to her, but in completely the wrong way. You acted like a whiny little bitch about it instead of like a man. Since you are actually high value, this really sucks, so get used to it, bub. You will then learn, that passing her tests are the only way you can actually be you, and you being enough.

THEN you are free to be the one deciding if she is good enough for you, and not the other way around.
Originally Posted By Luc1fer⏩
What's your game playing strategy (waiting to contact etc) - quid pro quo or automatic?

Maybe you're losing women like Daisy because of those games?

I told my gf on the FIRST date that I wanted to date her exclusively. That goes completely against you and Pondus rules.
Except she later said it was a significant plus that gave me the edge over most guys.
Bro, I'm not committing to anyone unless I KNOW she is worth it. That takes time. If you only want to date one woman at a time, that's fine, but don't ask her to be your G/F until you know she is worth it.

Your last G/F ate it up because she is BDP, not because it was the right thing to do.
Originally Posted By psychosylocibin⏩
Second this! It blow my mind at the behavoir of so many women as well. It's like they operate at a completely different emotional wavelength when it comes to relationships and sex. I cannot fathom how some girls can pull 180's and ghost etc, because I cannot imagine myself doing that, what kind of emotional rollercoaster I would have to possess to do something like that.
It's not a 180, it just seems like it to you because you don't understand how the female mind works. Logical vs emotional mind. It's not rocket science, but you do have to learn it. Once you wrap your head around it, you will no longer be an average frustrated chump and be so much happier.


So much happier.
Forever alone? Attraction and keeping the girl chasing you - http://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=131498033

You will never know your limits, unless you push yourself past the imaginary lines you have drawn in the sand.

Knee Dragger - '06 GSX-R750
post 1481879591 02-02-2017, 04:45 PM
-
#175
  1. Nedo
  2. Registered User
  1. Nedo
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Dec 2005
  4. Age: 41
  5. Posts: 9,105
  6. Rep Power: 8843
Originally Posted By daisygirl713⏩
You forget that no matter how attractive, every one is human. And each one of us is vulnerable to falling for one person and being totally attached to them, for better or for worse. Say a girl had a sh!t ton of DMs on instagram...so what? She's probably never read them or even accepted them. Same goes with online dating. But I can damn well bet she's checking her phone constantly for that ONE TEXT from that ONE GUY.

It's human nature. If you really like someone, they're it. That's all you see. And if you have the chance that someone else feels the same about you, try to avoid games. You are a good guy and I find you much more likable when you discard the idiotic 'pitch' and you're just freely, wholly yourself.
I don't play games to the extreme though and I don't believe there is anything morally wrong with not being in touch with someone you like the very next day after a date. Where is it written that the man should text the next day anyway right? Many of my dates have texted me night of. That gap in time and space when being reserved makes the next date all that much better as subconscious attraction was at play during your time apart/not communicating (provided there was a connection). I will especially drop my guard in terms of games if she doesn't play them. Miss "don't tell me what to do" didn't play games with me and all I did was be reserved and didn't text her everyday (neither did she though) if you even want to call that games. Told her truthfully she was the only girl I was seeing (normally wouldn't) when I could tell she was always digging to make sure she was the only one and it would of made her super jelly if she wasn't. I ain't so bad!

Update: Ashley is responding again, sooooooo hnnnnnnng
post 1481880131 02-02-2017, 04:49 PM
-
#176
  1. pondus_levo
  2. mic dropper
  1. pondus_levo
  2. mic dropper
  3. Join Date: Oct 2006
  4. Location: United States
  5. Posts: 24,811
  6. Rep Power: 163138
Originally Posted By Nedo⏩
I don't play games to the extreme though and I don't believe there is anything morally wrong with not being in touch with someone you like the very next day after a date. Where is it written that the man should text the next day anyway right? Many of my dates have texted me night of. That gap in time and space when being reserved makes the next date all that much better as subconscious attraction was at play during your time apart/not communicating (provided there was a connection). I will especially drop my guard in terms of games if she doesn't play them. Miss "don't tell me what to do" didn't play games with me and all I did was be reserved and didn't text her everyday (neither did she though) if you even want to call that games. Told her truthfully she was the only girl I was seeing (normally wouldn't) when I could tell she was always digging to make sure she was the only one and it would of made her super jelly if she wasn't. I ain't so bad!

Update: Ashley is responding again, sooooooo hnnnnnnng
Calibrate that ****, bruh! She's all yours!
Forever alone? Attraction and keeping the girl chasing you - http://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=131498033

You will never know your limits, unless you push yourself past the imaginary lines you have drawn in the sand.

Knee Dragger - '06 GSX-R750
post 1481891531 02-02-2017, 06:22 PM
-
#177
  1. Nedo
  2. Registered User
  1. Nedo
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Dec 2005
  4. Age: 41
  5. Posts: 9,105
  6. Rep Power: 8843
Originally Posted By pondus_levo⏩
Calibrate that ****, bruh! She's all yours!
I have, but it just seems so cringe and boring when I have to deviate from my style
post 1481892681 02-02-2017, 06:29 PM
-
#178
  1. psychosylocibin
  2. Registered User
  1. psychosylocibin
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Jul 2007
  4. Location: United States
  5. Age: 40
  6. Posts: 3,653
  7. Rep Power: 10708
Originally Posted By pondus_levo⏩
It's not a 180, it just seems like it to you because you don't understand how the female mind works. Logical vs emotional mind. It's not rocket science, but you do have to learn it. Once you wrap your head around it, you will no longer be an average frustrated chump and be so much happier.


So much happier.
This is what gest to me the most. I'm an extremely rational thinker. I know I have high value, yet girls don't think so because I can't properly pass "**** tests". why do I have to pass "****" tests to get them to prove their value to me when I am the one who already knows I am high value (objectively speaking). Why do I have to "prove" myself to them?

At the same time, I don't know what to do. I feel like this odd case where I know I am high value, yet I just don't know how to demonstrate it just to women. to be honest, I'm completely at a loss. Most guys/people tend to respect me and like me as a guy - make friends easily etc, just due to the fact that I can make intelligent conversation/put together for my age. So why do I have to "prove" this to women?

backing up a bit, I did make progress this past two weeks, I will be thankful for that. maybe this is a turning point and I should stick with it instead of go down the negative hole again.

Originally Posted By pondus_levo⏩
LOL at thinking we lack principle. Just because we know how to pass **** tests doesn't mean we put up with their ****. Get it through your head. A woman will **** test you if you lackcongruence. Your first date ended in sex and probably leaving you with high value. Something happened after the fact that lowered your value. None of us know what that might have been, only you can speculate. I highly doubt it was just because you msged her first the next day. My guess is you became too available without continuing to push her emotional buttons.

Her **** test was to re-evaluate your value and you failed.This is not something she pre-meditated!**** tests are an emotional response to something not making sense in her logical mind. Failing the tests proved to her that you are actually low value.You couldn't deal with everything not being perfect on the second date. What you don't realize, is that you could have stood up for your principles and still passed her **** test. In fact, that would have been the only way to prove to her that you were high value. You stood up to her, but in completely the wrong way. You acted like a whiny little bitch about it instead of like a man. Since you are actually high value, this really sucks, so get used to it, bub. You will then learn, that passing her tests are the only way you can actually be you, and you being enough.


So much happier.
Things were different from the second I picked her up. In my mind, she had already lost attraction. what am I supposed to do now? was this a giant **** test? was I supposed to just have fun, converse, and then end the date and drop her off and leave it at that even though she was acting completely different? and then suddenly after I dropped her off she goes "omg, I acted like I was not into him at all, and he didnt care..and now suddenly I Want to suck his cawk" It seems like some sort of bipolar disorder to be honest. or do women really act completely disinterested on purpose for a whole date after phukking you as a giant **** test
-Max Squat drops from 415 to 200 after going 1 degree past 90 degree knee bend crew.
post 1481893141 02-02-2017, 06:32 PM
-
#179
  1. pondus_levo
  2. mic dropper
  1. pondus_levo
  2. mic dropper
  3. Join Date: Oct 2006
  4. Location: United States
  5. Posts: 24,811
  6. Rep Power: 163138
Nedo, Some women just don't have the texting skills. You have to remember you are a LVL 999.

Is she engaging at all? Maybe once you reel her in and get her out on a date she will be more fun.

Update:

Girl 5 accused me of being a player for the 2nd time. I think I may have induced a ****-test storm. LOL I need to slow my roll.

I don't want to **** it up, so 100% not going to ask her to cuddle after our date on Saturday. Her dog can, though, that's fine.

I think I might be catching feels for her already. She did another thing today that blew my mind.
Forever alone? Attraction and keeping the girl chasing you - http://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=131498033

You will never know your limits, unless you push yourself past the imaginary lines you have drawn in the sand.

Knee Dragger - '06 GSX-R750
post 1481913571 02-02-2017, 09:03 PM
-
#180
  1. US_Ranger
  2. Registered User
  1. US_Ranger
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Apr 2005
  4. Location: California, United States
  5. Age: 44
  6. Posts: 32,182
  7. Rep Power: 120822
Originally Posted By pondus_levo⏩
Girl 5 accused me of being a player for the 2nd time. I think I may have induced a ****-test storm. LOL
Oh?
I think I might be catching feels for her already. She did another thing today that blew my mind.
Lol.

Not sure if this is a text to reality issue here but if you're giving people advice on dating while playing stupid games like this....yeah.

If she's kidding around with you and it's for ****s and giggles, cool. If she legit thinks you're a player (like I said, could be the text reading not being the same as real life) and you're catching feels, you have some serious issues of your own you need to work on.

Maybe clarify that **** cuzz.
Quick Navigation Top Misc
« Previous Thread | Next Thread »
Bookmarks
Digg.com
Digg
del.icio.us
del.icio.us
Stumbleupon.com
StumbleUpon
Google.com
Google
Facebook.com
Facebook
Posting Permissions
  1. You may not post new threads
  2. You may not post replies
  3. You may not post attachments
  4. You may not edit your posts