So ever since I got back from Thailand this July, I've had nothing but terrible date after terrible date. This is when the dates even show up. I'm having trouble of keeping track of all of them since they've been so bad but I figure I'll make a sort of dating log. This is partly for me to record what absolutely horrible (when they show up) dates I've been on and also for you guys to add your own stories in of your terrible dates that you go on. Feel free to add to the list, try to make it easy to read. Also:

1) Try to be somewhat subjective. It's easy to say "This girl sucks" when in reality you were hammering shots of jack daniels and slobbering all over her.

2) Try to not omit pertinent facts that might also paint you in a bad light

3) Just be honest

^-----These are important if you're going to tell a whole story. If you just cliffs it, we can dissect after

Here we go, I'll cliff the last few months for some of the worst ones and then I'll add in the latest terrible ones:

August:

-Talking to a girl from a town 2 hours away
-We decide I'll drive down and we'll go out
-I drive 1 hour 50 minutes and text her I'm 10 minutes out
-She bails

August:

-Talking to a local girl
-Tell her I'll meet her at X location
-Go to X location
-She never shows

August:

-Talking to a local girl
-She says she'd like to meet at X location
-I arrive at X location to find it's been closed down
-Never hear from her again

September:

-Go out with woman who's interested in animals
-She's the most boring human being I've ever been on a date with
-I carry the conversation, make her laugh, do everything in my power to keep her entertained
-She tells me how she has 4 guys on rotation in love with her (wtf)
-At the end of the night she says "I have to work at noon tomorrow, I should get home"

September:

-Go out with a single mom
-She instantly starts asking me about how much money I make, etc etc
-At the end of the date, she tells me I'm a really nice guy, amazing, super cool, etc
-Never hear from her again

September:

-Go out with a single mom
-Have a good date, laughing, joking, lot in common (soccer, outdoor activities, etc)
-She tells me how she's going to set up this hot air balloon date for us
-She tells me I'm the most amazing guy she's met in years
-Never hear from her again

Two nights ago:

-Get told by this bartender chick that I can meet her at X place at Y time
-She never shows up

Tonight:

-Talk to this girl who does MMA
-I pick her up to take her to trivia night to meet a group
-We're joking the entire time, talking about snowboarding, mma, traveling (she's not from here originally)
-She gets on her phone and doesn't talk for the next 20 minutes
-I pay tab (like an idiot) and bail on trivia night and take her home
-She gives me a hug and says "See you again if you want to" (why do girls say this when they don't want to see you again?)
-Say FCK IT and text her asking her what exactly the deal was and if I was boring, she wasn't attracted to me, etc
-She says I touched her hair and it was too soon for that (seriously said that) and that I should never take a girl to a place with friends there on a first date
-I respond by saying I asked her yesterday if she wanted to go and she said yes (no answer)
-Text her again saying I'm signing up at her MMA gym so don't make it awkward when I'm there
-She finally texts back saying it won't be
-Delete number, etc



So yep, that's where I'm at right now. I touched this chick's hair and that means I'm a **** date. Meanwhile she's on her phone for 20+ minutes and that's ok. I didn't even have the energy to tell her how rude it is to do that. I honestly just said fck it and gave up at that point. I don't want to make it any worse if I see her at the gym.

I feel defeated. Not in the sense that I give up and I'll quit. Just in the sense that I'm so blown away that people can not realize their own behavior. I'm so hard on myself that I resort to asking women (when it doesn't work out) what I can do to improve myself, etc. I know a lot of beta guys in here (I say beta because you *******s think you're alpha by never admitting your own faults) would say you should never ask a woman about what you did wrong, how to improve, etc but I figure if I'm going to never see this person again, I might as well find out the little things I might be overlooking. Unfortunately, I get answers like "noooo, you're nice" or "you touched my hair" instead of anything real. I guess that's the point where I should unload back on them but that just comes off as bitter and, as we've discussed here before, no attractive woman is going to admit they fcked up. They're just going to text their next guy in line and get the "OMG, HE DOESN'T DESERVE YOU" treatment. So round and round we go.

This is my evening rant. Prepping for a job interview now so on to better things. Just wondering when I'm going to meet someone who's not a sociopath, doesn't have a substance abuse problem, isn't a complete narcissist, doesn't have daddy issues or isn't bipolar. Not looking good so far. Cheers misc!

First.

So I don't know about the hair touching thing. Also I don't know about the whole 'you shouldn't take her to a place with friends'. So weird.

There have been some women that my personality and chemistry just instantly matches with a girl. It's weird. Some girls I feel like I intimidate as I am a cerebral, well thought out guy, and I think my intellectual side challenges a lot of girls.

Other girls I will have the same conversation and YEP it's like pulling teeth to get them to converse with me. I feel like I have to touch them to elicit some sort of connection and get them comfortable around me. I realize WHY you touched the girls hair and I totally get that. Some women are comfortable with it, but other's aren't because it triggers something in them for whatever reason.

I chalk it up to differences in personalities. It's akin to poker or any high probability game; variance. I really don't know and yeah I'd really like to see how you interact in person.

I really dislike online dating honestly given I feel like it is best to form an organic conversation and relationship with someone instead of predicting that you will be compatible with them based on what you see 'on paper'. Chemistry and attraction is totally unpredictable IMO.

In for more of course.

In...

bro ... i hope some "success stories" in between... not for my joy.. but your own sanity.

haven't had any **** dates (only been dating properly for like 4 months tho). I had one girl that I got a number of with one line immediately for a date the next day, she got 'cold feet' like an hour beforehand but still text me to let me know she pussied out, probably had a boyfriend.

Every girl I meet with it always goes really well and we smash even the seemingly good ones. Having said that if when I'm talking to her on tinder/bumble the convo is **** I generally just leave it at that. I don't pursue women who can't hold a conversation over text/flirt, other than looks that is the biggest turnoff for me.

rip modern dating. women are a joke nowadays. No respect anymore for men. I hope it ****s them up when they find out no1 wants them anymore after their prime time is over. Guys need to get their priorities straight and stop bending backward for ungrateful narcissistic trashes and see women for what they are, egocentric greedy pieces of ****

Women love their children first, then themselves, then money, then sex, then their girl friends, then their cat, then what men can do for them, and men go much further down that list. In fact since society made it possible for them to pull their own weights without depending on us, we just have to see how little they really ever really needed or cared about us lol

I think the best trick to use on them is ghosting. The moment they begin to be too proud of themselves, go no contact and just completely vanish from their life without a warning. Just to remind them that they're worth is lower than dirt

The only bad one that stuck out to me this summer was going on a date with a 30yr old virgin which I came to discover during the date. Girl was legit visibly shaking in nervousness upon greeting me and initially sitting down for coffee. I actually told her to relax and started poking at her for it which made her open up. Had to carry the entire convo, yet she was VERY VERY interested. I face this far too many times where I need to carry the convo and its so annoying. Throw me an extrovert for once will ya!

Forgot this one from last week:

-Go on a date with 27 year old
-She was engaged to a military guy previously and we were joking around about that, seemed to have a lot in common
-Having dinner with her, conversation is going well, she likes to talk (thank god)
-She tells me she's miserable at work, I ask questions about places she could apply to fix it
-Conversation goes well, I tell her I'll send her job link stuff for positions with state government
-I get home, send her some job links I had saved up
-She thanks me over and over, saying it's so nice of me
-Text her next day
-Never hear from her again

Fuk brah, you've a bad go. Good on you for keeping your head up and continuing to grind. Dat feel when you have mental strength and know your worth! The fact that you travel alot for work means you are stuck fishing on dating sites primarily. This contributes to meeting the trash that you do as alot of us have come to learn.

I know you know what you're doing, and I look to you for a lot of advice and learning and whatnot, but have you ever stopped and considered that maybe you're doing the same things in each date that is turning women off? your strategy of asking what you did wrong is what really helped me grow in my sales career. it's an amazing strategy but it takes a lot of humility to swallow.

Two years ago November:

Set up date with girl from dating site (First real date in life at 28)
We meet for dinner
She says almost nothing
I panic and just spew from my mouth about completely random crap
I get the feeling she's not interested, give her two opportunities to guilt free bail, she stays saying she is enjoying the conversation...
I run out of things to talk about and feel like an idiot and end it myself
When leaving I actually ask how to end the date if a handshake / hug or w/e was acceptable, she bear hugs me...
Never hear from her again

Last year February:

Set up date with girl from dating site
We meet at bowling alley
She is a fanatical football fan, and I barely know what team plays for what state
She seems obviously turned off by my lack of knowledge
Makes fun of me about my dieting and work out ethic (Even though she was in good shape)
Teases me about my timid shy nature calling me a girl
Says she definitely wants a second date that I am really cute
Never hear from her again

Last year March:

Set up date with girl from tinder
Meet up at a bar
Her sister and some other guy join us
Other guy proceeds to poke at me the entire night and is belligerent
I try to ignore said guy, and during his smoke breaks my date and me talk about how much of an ass he is being...
Night ends, I walk her to her car, she tells me she wants to see me again but she's gota go get a friend from work.
Never hear from her again

Last year July:

Girl starts working at my job
I get put in charge of training her
We make friends and start going to lunches regularly
We hang out after work a few times
Make attempts to advance relationship, gets met with heavy resistance
Get told several times I'm too intense and pressuring
Meanwhile she continuously sets up hang out situations
Eventually I break off contact, but have to continue working with her
She makes it incredibly hard to avoid her intentionally
I end up emotionally attached and devastated which is my own fault
End up taking it out on her by being an *******
Regret it to this day
Haven't heard from her since January this year

This year July:

Meet waitress at bar
We go to waffle house after bar closes
We go back to her apartment (first time at a girls place)
I ask for permission to kiss her, cringe factor is epic
Met with sob story about how she's not in a good place atm
Continue to just hang out not sure what to do
End up leaving the next day at lunch after being up all night when she finally passes out on the couch
Keep in contact through text, but she's blown me off several times
Still possibility of meeting her this weekend though

^ are you at least learning from your mistakes and do you feel yourself becoming more confident?

I guess I am just no that nice of a guy, I wouldn't be hooking her up with job info after a first date. Fukk her, you don't know her, you owe her nothing.

Driving 2 hours for a chick? Nah dude, meet me half way or no deal.



You are being way too nice to these hoes man, I can tell just from their response. If a girl tells you that you are a real nice guy on a first date, it's the kiss of death.

There's got to be some incentive as to why you are giving them this stuff.

I think this is subtle stuff though. I'm starting to just ignore or unmatch girls who have lackluster conversation after me trying a few times.

I was never a big fan of building rapport it is completely over rated, especially online dating. Small talk, hey hows it going, what are your interests blah blah, two questions max and ask to meet if she flakes or dances around the subject, I stop texting them.

Subbed.


Just got of a long term relationship myself recently and have already been talking to randoms. No real dates yet as I'm taking it slow and adjusting to being single again. Not heart broken, not sad, and no emotional regret due to mutual break up. But here's some instances from some of the girls I've talked to that I'm just not that interested in.

Old friend:
- She is newly into the fitness world (about 1-2 years)
- She got out of a LTR as well
- She's talking to some dude that lives like 45 minutes away
- She hits me up on the IG asking to workout
- We met up, trained, had a good time, caught up, etc
- Maintain texting, and tells me about how much he sucks (dude can't even change a tire and she tried calling me to save her while she was at his place --- I said fugg dat and sent her a "how to change a tire" YT video for her specific vehicle)
- I kind of stopped talking to her after that, she's kind of loud and annoying at times
----- Not going to pursue

Tindgirl#1
- Girl pursues me
- Real good conversation
- Sarcasm and wit was on point
- Lives 45 minutes away (fugg dat)
----- Not going to pursue

Tindgirl #2
- She messaged me first asking what job I have (she's an 8th grade teacher and looked super nerdy in her pics)
- I tell her, however my job is very technical so, it sounded super geeky (but also professional)
- Thought it would've been a good match, but she ghosted



So far I've been pursued by the girls, and they're all pretty cute/good looking. Conversation is always great, but then ghost.

Lol where are you finding these broads bro? Has to be online dating due to autism levels they are showing.

Haven't been on any dates recently, just ONS with randoms.

Last "date" was girl invited me over to her place for drinks and chill. Sleep in the same bed that night, she gets naked and tries making moves. I say "let's just cuddle".

Night 2, invited over for dinner and movies. Watching movie getting ready to leave. Gives me a surprise bj into smash.

Will try some dates to add to this scientific research.

Kudos to you for the honesty Ranger.

I did the whole online dating thing over 12 years ago (lavallife, match) and had good results but I just can't get back into it now after all of these stories that I hear. I honestly think that FB and Tinder have just destroyed what was once a viable option to meet someone. I may give e-harmony a go.... since that seems to require some level of commitment (with you having to pay for it).

EDIT: Guess I'll add a story about the most recent ex (2 yrs ago).

- meet chick through mutual friend and hit it off (although we lived in different cities at the time... me in Calgary, her in Toronto).
- talk and a text a lot and build a good rapport
- after a few weeks have a talk about giving things a go (exclusive) and agree to proceed.
- I rearrange my work sched so that I work 6 days on and 6 days off and fly back and forth every days off to ensure that we have some quality time together.
- also have to drive across the city to her place every time (since she has no car)
- start noticing little things like no pics of us on FB (which I find odd for a girl since most are all about it)
- eventually find out that she still talks to ex on a semi-regular basis and went to dinner and a movie with him when I was out of town (lol me).
- also found out that one of her best friends (who she works with) was also a former FWB.
- planned a trip to SE Asia with her roommate for 3 months and didn't invite me for even a portion of it (beginning of the end here)
- broke up with her shortly after she got back.

All told... a year of my life wasted. Ah, well....

Geez, I haven't had any experiences nearly as bad as yours, but then again I am extremely particular with who I message when it comes to online dating, if I don't detect the level of interest I am looking for I don't even bother, which so far I have been right as they don't even bother texting back to ask what happened to me or why I stopped messaging them.

As far as why you keep failing, I am not sure if it's because you're doing something wrong on the dates, or mostly due to the fact that these women just aren't that attracted to you. Sad thing about online dating is that having 'good game' helps a lot, but if they have guys on rotation and they out do you in the looks department the chances of them contacting you again or soon are fairly slim.

Only thing I can really suggest if you aren't doing this already, is just to be more picky about who you take on a date, don't just go because the option was there and they showed you some interest, it really does help save time,money.

I have very few bad dates and that's because most of the Women I go on dates with are very attracted to me...the bad ones are ones where I make a huge mistake (eg be too sexually forward) or they aren't that into me. So it's either they aren't that jnto you or you're making a big mistake on each date

You must not be filtering girls enough in the texting stage. I've got some dates coming up next weekend I might plop them in here if the threads still going.

I don't see anything wrong with this. This is the type of niceness we should be exercising, not paying for all her chit and buying her things. Even if she doesn't work out, nothing wrong with helping someone out. There doesn't always need to be a reward for sincerity brah. A good person gives/helps without expecting anything back

i disagree with offering the jobs for the sole fact that that is your reputation on the line and for all you know she could be a complete piece of shiit employee. and I'm absolutely sure I already know more suitable candidates. but to each their own.

sharing "niceness" could be a deeper kinda talk or a small piece of advice or just giving your own unique point of view on something that makes her think differently.

I went on a the most terrible date yesterday with this ******* named HoustonMiscer. Fukker didn't say anything, he just stayed quiet like a little bitch. You know damn well I wasn't paying for that motherfukker meal so I just left srs.

May:first girl I've went on a date with since my ex from last year. Went to a restaurant for drinks then comedy after. Went well, brought her back and got it in. Continued to go on some dates and hookup for that month. She says she wants a relationship, I say nope and we break it off. She's been hitting me up randomly the last month and readded me on snap.

June:
date with Mormon chick from tinder, went to eat some tacos, get to know each other, goes well, bring her back and we watch a movie or two. End up making out, sucking tetas, won't let me go further. We go on another date as she's a pretty nice girl, cute, interesting. Do the same thing again, she goes to Europe for the rest of the summer. We text each other sometimes but haven't seen each other since she's came back.

Go to vermont for family reunion. Meet up with tinder girl at her place, we drink, she shows me around her place she bought, play darts, play cards, hook up that night and never talk to her again after she drops me off.

Go back home and go on a date with tinder girl two of that week. We get something to eat and go back to my place to watch a movie. She wasn't ready yet to hookup so we just make out and that's it. She comes over two days later and we go out for drinks and hookup that night. Never saw her again, she's been hitting me up the past month about wanting to come over but I don't feel like it.

Day later I go to visit some teacher chick from match. Get to her place, talk in her bed for 30 minutes, end up hooking up then we go to the casino and gamble and watch a movie. Never seen her again since she lives like a hour away, she constantly hits me up with nakies trying to get me to visit her.

July:
Go on a date at the bar for drinks with another teacher. We hit it off pretty good, she was nervous at first and can see her hands shaking but she starts opening up after a drink. Play pool, talk, and drink for 3-4 hours. We make out at the end of the night, I could've pushed to get her to my place but didn't. Ended up dating this chick for two months. Waste of time, didn't even smash smh. Says it seemed more like friends than a relationship to me, I say it's all good, not like I'm pissed about it since I wasn't too invested into it.

September:
Crazy 20 year old tinder chicks shows up at my place after a night of working, had a project I had to work nights that week to finish. She comes in, we talk 20 minutes, hook up for a couple hours. Girls a freak but decide to not bring her over again as I think she's hiding a bf and all that.

Tinder light skinned black girl I had matched before back in February matches with me again. I ask for snap immediately before she ends up finding a guy. We had good talks before and she's got her ish together. We talk on snap and text for a week and a half or so, one night were talking sexual and she says fk it come over. End up going to her place and talking for 30 minutes to loosen up then fk. Plan to actually go out with her this weekend.

Last weekend met up with a girl from tinder while visiting an Oktoberfest event. We had talked for a week before this. My group and her group meet up, do the event, go to the bar, then I go with her to some get together. End up having her drop off my friend and I at our condo and she stay over and we hookup. Only problem is she lives two hours away or I'd probably try something with her too. We might meetup for a Halloween thing in two weekends, depending if she's working or not.

Had successful dates or whatever you'd like to call them but failed with the one girl I did try a relationship with. We'll see with the ones I've been talking to where it goes. Have a Hispanic lawyer girl I've been talking to too that wants to meet up. But might wait first to see where it goes with these other two and if I want to try a relationship with one of them.

This is my approach also. I've never been desperate or lowered my standards with dating, I just go with the flow until I find a chick I click with who actually seems interested in me. I don't know what type of woman you go for, if you're filtering these chicks, what kind of filters you apply or if you're just mass messaging Ranger, but perhaps you should consider being pickier? I've always found it easy to gauge women's interest in me, and don't have nearly as many ghosts as you seem to have. Rarely have I vibed really well with a chick and had a good first date only for her to disappear afterward. Just being constructive not saying you're chasing every hoe you meet or anything.

Can we all agree that we shouldn't use online dating solely as the only avenue to meeting women and getting dates?

Absolutely. Nobody should be using dating sites/apps as their only means to meet women.

oh that sucks. Hope you get better dates soon.As for the "touching her hair" comment, I have a follow up question for you. Did she touch you too? If yes, then she has a problem. If no, then I would understand that some people have their own personal space and they are uncomfortable with people touching them especially on the first date. They don't know you that well yet. Can you imagine if she was that easy enough to let every guy touch her on the first date? Yikes..

As for taking the girl to a place with friends, I can see that she might feel the pressure to impress not only you but to your friends too. You are friendly and outgoing so you might not have a problem with going to a place where her friends hang out and have fun with them. Just two different personalities between you and her. Good luck!

For sure. I'll keep using them until all the women are gone on it though 😆. While I was dating the girl for two months during the summer, I should've been picking up numbers from girls that I talked to or that approached me at the bars and clubs. Stupid for me not to but oh well, there's always more girls out at the bars.

Confidence is an issue I've had for a long time, for some reason I have a very low opinion of myself despite being paid many complements from people around me and strangers who have no reason to lie to me. I think it has a lot to do with lowering expectations for others so that I can't disappoint people for failing when they expect it from me. I think it's a defense mechanism, but I can't seem to stop doing it, I've been trying to reprogram myself and it's been a really long process, one I seem to be getting better at, but it's a daily struggle.

I've had to learn emotionally not to get attached to people, but not to bury or run from emotions. I had to develop distractions and coping mechanisms to give me a foundation when things don't go the way I planned. I've also had to learn to stop being so results oriented and hyper logical. My intensity and being results driven has been really difficult to overcome, I am EXTREMELY impatient and would rather work at something 20 hours a day to get it as fast as possible than wait. I will literally drive an hour out of my way to pick up something from a store instead of ordering it online.

Throw in that I have type 2 bi-polar, OCD, Body Dismorphia / Body Image Issues that fuel an eating disorder, and you've got yourself a nice roller coaster of mood swings that lead to panic attacks and depression or crazy highs where I don't consider consequences.

I've definitely learned a ton though.