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» More General Categories » Relationships and Relationships Help » Can't get/stay hard with girl srs
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post 1625590283 12-15-2020, 07:17 AM
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Can't get/stay hard with girl srs

Girl I've been seeing recently.

In fairness I was really sleep deprived. We stayed together for 2 nights, and i only managed to get semi hard like twice

The rest of the time I would go soft or nothing would happen full stop

There were multiple times where she was literally sukking me off and nothing would happen. I would feel aroused but that's it. Another time I thought right emergency measures - I started jacking off then I put it inside her and went soft.

Was incredibly embarrassing for me, I spoke to her about it after and naturally she thought it was her like I didn't find her attractive or something - and I clarified i was just really tired

But the truth is I've been very tired before with girls and I've still been able to get hard, at least hard enough to put it in, and once that happens I'll usually make up the rest pretty quickly

For it to happen consecutively over a 2 day break (happened like 5 times) was just a massive blow to my ego and I feel like sh*t

Not really sure how to fix this problem other than making sure I sleep really well before I see her again. I'm even taking zinc, vit d and a multi - to no avail

I was horny af around her - i wanted to fuk her all the time - I just couldn't get it up

This is the first time this has happened consistently over a period. Need some serious input because if it happens next time I see her (scheduled for around 1 week from now) I'm thinking about breaking it off - purely to further protect my ego fully srs

I couldn't keep seeing a girl that my dick doesn't work for its embarrassing af

To make matters worse this is someone who i don't actually want to date seriously - we have really good sexual chemistry (up until this episode) and that was the main thing I was in this for.

I ate her out/fingered her a load of times (and she came every time) but just feel like a bit of a cuck when I'm not getting my own needs met, but it isn't even her fault.
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post 1625590953 12-15-2020, 07:24 AM
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Get the blue pill if you want to bang uggos.
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post 1625591213 12-15-2020, 07:28 AM
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Sounds like it has to be a mental thing getting in the way one way or another. What makes it stranger is that you don’t want to gf her up so you shouldn’t really care about nerves, performance anxiety etc. Maybe you’re just not comfortable enough with her yet. I know once you sleep with a chick enough you dgaf anymore and have no problems getting and staying hard and busting.

Pretend you want to gf her up lol. There might be your fix.
post 1625591523 12-15-2020, 07:31 AM
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  1. smashedurgfx10
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Originally Posted By Imnew1
Sounds like it has to be a mental thing getting in the way one way or another. What makes it stranger is that you don’t want to gf her up so you shouldn’t really care about nerves, performance anxiety etc. Maybe you’re just not comfortable enough with her yet. I know once you sleep with a chick enough you dgaf anymore and have no problems getting and staying hard and busting.

Pretend you want to gf her up lol. There might be your fix.
I think it initially was physical because I was so tired

Then when it happened the 2nd time it became a mental thing and I was getting worried about it, so it kept happening

She's actually been really good about it. She didn't say anything or pressure me at all. I want to please her even though she isn't my gf. Thats why i was going down on her so at least she got off. Its just natural to want to fuk a chick good so when your cawk doesn't work it feels terrible and I feel like she probably lost respect for me

I'm worried that this is going to happen next time as well. Saying to myself 'don't stress about it' really doesn't help. I can't get it off my mind

I'm not 100% comfortable with her. But that wasn't an issue for me last time I saw her. Granted I wasn't at full mast but at least enough to pound her, this time she was literally slopping on my dick (3 times, in 2 days) and every time I was soft. It was a nightmare fully srs.
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post 1625592113 12-15-2020, 07:39 AM
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Most probably was mental you were overthinking/ anxious. Or you was in bed with some fat whale which would explain it. Who cares? If this doesn’t happen often
post 1625597913 12-15-2020, 08:49 AM
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Tired plus mentally worrying about this is the issue. Once this gets on your mind it’s over. Take 25mg of viagra or better cialis for a few times just to feel confident again. You’ll be fine. Been there
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post 1625602293 12-15-2020, 09:30 AM
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Originally Posted By dolvioblue
Tired plus mentally worrying about this is the issue. Once this gets on your mind it’s over. Take 25mg of viagra or better cialis for a few times just to feel confident again. You’ll be fine. Been there
I don't really want to go the viagra route but I am considering stocking up on a a mountain of test/libido increasing supps

I already have maca. Will check out cialis as well

Still in shock tbh I've never had this problem before and im wondering what it means on a deeper level - like maybe my body is telling me im not that into her/something is off

We should be banging each others brains out and being able to go multiple rounds and I can't even get it up for one

And for what it's worth, I rubbed one out when I got back earlier today and I got hard (not fully but 80%) in no time at all.

So I know for sure its mental. But no idea why it is or how to overcome it.

Like I said she was really cool about it.
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post 1625603133 12-15-2020, 09:39 AM
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Definitely a mental thing, if you can still jerk off, then it can't be physical.

No porn and no fap is the best way to get it back.
post 1625604133 12-15-2020, 09:49 AM
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Originally Posted By soberchuck
Definitely a mental thing, if you can still jerk off, then it can't be physical.

No porn and no fap is the best way to get it back.
I don't watch porn, but usually fap at least every other day

If I stop until I next see her I'm worried I'm gonna subconsciously put even more pressure on myself, because I'm going so out of my way to try and fix it
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post 1625604713 12-15-2020, 09:54 AM
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Originally Posted By smashedurgfx10
I don't watch porn, but usually fap at least every other day

If I stop until I next see her I'm worried I'm gonna subconsciously put even more pressure on myself, because I'm going so out of my way to try and fix it
Try it anyway, the horniness will likely override the anxiety.
post 1625605033 12-15-2020, 09:57 AM
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Originally Posted By Kev1972
Get the blue pill if you want to bang uggos.
This.
post 1625605353 12-15-2020, 10:00 AM
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  1. smashedurgfx10
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Originally Posted By 401Delta
This.
She's decently attractive

Probably a 7.5 face and a 6.5 body. Not athletic at all but big tits and ass, just got lucky with fat storage genetics

I've got hard to girls who are way less attractive than her no pills needed

And the first time we smashed a while ago, got super hard and went multiple rounds - AND it was with a rubber. This time it was raw
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post 1625605533 12-15-2020, 10:01 AM
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Originally Posted By smashedurgfx10
I don't really want to go the viagra route but I am considering stocking up on a a mountain of test/libido increasing supps

I already have maca. Will check out cialis as well

Still in shock tbh I've never had this problem before and im wondering what it means on a deeper level - like maybe my body is telling me im not that into her/something is off

We should be banging each others brains out and being able to go multiple rounds and I can't even get it up for one

And for what it's worth, I rubbed one out when I got back earlier today and I got hard (not fully but 80%) in no time at all.

So I know for sure its mental. But no idea why it is or how to overcome it.

Like I said she was really cool about it.
It’s nothing more than your body probably telling you that it’s run down and needs a break. We are not machines and this is something women don’t ever have to worry about. We do all the work during sex and getting a jacked hard on doesn’t happen all the time for us. Sometimes we just don’t feel like banging or we are tired. Nothing that isn’t normal about this.

So your body is telling you that you need a break and some sleep. So instead you force yourself to have sex and don’t get rock hard. Then your mind starts to go overtime and everything becomes a mess.

Take a week off. Get some rest. Plan a night with her and just relax. Maybe take things slow and build up to it and most of all have some fun. Pressure makes everything worse for us.
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post 1625606203 12-15-2020, 10:09 AM
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Originally Posted By dolvioblue
It’s nothing more than your body probably telling you that it’s run down and needs a break. We are not machines and this is something women don’t ever have to worry about. We do all the work during sex and getting a jacked hard on doesn’t happen all the time for us. Sometimes we just don’t feel like banging or we are tired. Nothing that isn’t normal about this.

So your body is telling you that you need a break and some sleep. So instead you force yourself to have sex and don’t get rock hard. Then your mind starts to go overtime and everything becomes a mess.

Take a week off. Get some rest. Plan a night with her and just relax. Maybe take things slow and build up to it and most of all have some fun. Pressure makes everything worse for us.
I completely agree with you about the machine part. For sure I'm run down.

I think I'm just finding it hard to take the pressure off myself because I want to make a good impression - whether I keep seeing her or not

It would be such a massive hit to my ego if she categorised me in her head as the guy who couldn't get it up

I know i shouldn't care what she thinks, and I don't, outside the bedroom. I'm normally pretty good in bed (multiple testimonials) so to have this is hitting me quite hard
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post 1625607443 12-15-2020, 10:24 AM
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Username to post content does not compute.

What a beta miscer. OP, redeem yourself and post pics for a real evaluation.
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post 1625608283 12-15-2020, 10:33 AM
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Originally Posted By BullittEV
Username to post content does not compute.

What a beta miscer. OP, redeem yourself and post pics for a real evaluation.
Thanks bro. Take care
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post 1625610663 12-15-2020, 10:58 AM
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Originally Posted By MuricaaBrah
It's easier to deal with performance anxiety for people like you... Who get no p*ssy LOL
Lol what? Im not OP.
Originally Posted By smashedurgfx10
Thanks bro. Take care
Np, brah. Hope your lil dink eventually works and she stops making fun of you behind your back with the rest of the girls in the area now knowing youre an impotent *******.
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post 1625610993 12-15-2020, 11:02 AM
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Originally Posted By BullittEV
Lol what? Im not OP.



Np, brah. Hope your lil dink eventually works and she stops making fun of you behind your back with the rest of the girls in the area now knowing youre an impotent *******.
Youre a salty little kunt aren't you bro.

Must be having a great day to come and talk sh*t online.

Did your mom not respond to your text message?
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post 1625611753 12-15-2020, 11:09 AM
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Originally Posted By smashedurgfx10
Youre a salty little kunt aren't you bro.

Must be having a great day to come and talk sh*t online.

Did your mom not respond to your text message?
True, definitely a salty response, but honest as well. Take that into account, please.

I say this from experience- girls are brutal and talk a LOT of chit about stuff like this. 100% she has already told her friend group and it's probably spread from there. I have a gf now but before that it would set up for some brutal, brutal mogging. Been there and seen it- when you are going down on her I really doubt shes thinking about you.

I could be wrong, but probably not. Time to move on to the next girl because this will haunt you for the rest of your life.

Have a great day!
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post 1625611783 12-15-2020, 11:09 AM
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Originally Posted By smashedurgfx10
I completely agree with you about the machine part. For sure I'm run down.

I think I'm just finding it hard to take the pressure off myself because I want to make a good impression - whether I keep seeing her or not

It would be such a massive hit to my ego if she categorised me in her head as the guy who couldn't get it up

I know i shouldn't care what she thinks, and I don't, outside the bedroom. I'm normally pretty good in bed (multiple testimonials) so to have this is hitting me quite hard
This is why I said to take a 25mg viagra tablet or cialis. It just takes the edge off especially if you have had some drinks. It allows your mind to relax and get out of your head.
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post 1625611893 12-15-2020, 11:10 AM
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Originally Posted By BullittEV
Lol what? Im not OP.



Np, brah. Hope your lil dink eventually works and she stops making fun of you behind your back with the rest of the girls in the area now knowing youre an impotent *******.
STFU and get out of here
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post 1625614093 12-15-2020, 11:28 AM
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Originally Posted By BullittEV
True, definitely a salty response, but honest as well. Take that into account, please.

I say this from experience- girls are brutal and talk a LOT of chit about stuff like this. 100% she has already told her friend group and it's probably spread from there. I have a gf now but before that it would set up for some brutal, brutal mogging. Been there and seen it- when you are going down on her I really doubt shes thinking about you.

I could be wrong, but probably not. Time to move on to the next girl because this will haunt you for the rest of your life.

Have a great day!
Didnt read srs
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post 1625614973 12-15-2020, 11:36 AM
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Any particular reason why you'd care w/ her more than any other women?

Could be you're not as attracted to her compared to who you were with prior to her and you're trying to give her your A+ game for the validation of knowing you're a stud but you're just not as into it as you want to be?

Or

She's more attractive than your last partner, or more experienced, or is someone you want to impress due to her social circle/status or something and you're putting too much pressure on yourself?

If it wasn't a problem the first few times then it could be a combination of things but taking a pill once or twice won't make you dependent on it. Or maybe you need a change and you've already peaked with her and it's time to move on.
post 1625615173 12-15-2020, 11:39 AM
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Originally Posted By dolvioblue
STFU and get out of here
Lmfao, this happened to you, too, didn't it? Textbook response.
Originally Posted By smashedurgfx10
Didnt read srs
Yes, you did. If you dont like to the hear the truth that's on you, bruh.
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post 1625616083 12-15-2020, 11:47 AM
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Man, this happened to me recently. But the girl was giving me such wild hot and cold signals I didn't even wanna fuk her by the end of it. When we were mid-bang I went soft. I was wasted, but her vibe in general was just so intense, like she was always in flight mode or something. Then after that she just got weird about sex every time. I also got real into my head about it, like you are. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, probably on both ends too.

But I've also come to realize, some times the body will go into self-preservation mode....IE, if a girl is giving you weird vibes or signals, your dick will be like "She's hot but do you really wanna deal with the mental baggage again?"
post 1625616453 12-15-2020, 11:51 AM
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#26
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Originally Posted By dolvioblue
This is why I said to take a 25mg viagra tablet or cialis. It just takes the edge off especially if you have had some drinks. It allows your mind to relax and get out of your head.
Yeah thats actually one difference between the last times and this one. We always used to have a few drinks
Originally Posted By BullittEV
Yes, you did. If you dont like to the hear the truth that's on you, bruh.
Why would I read it?
Youre saying nothing productive. Go outside man
Originally Posted By CrimsonSteel
Man, this happened to me recently. But the girl was giving me such wild hot and cold signals I didn't even wanna fuk her by the end of it. When we were mid-bang I went soft. I was wasted, but her vibe in general was just so intense, like she was always in flight mode or something. Then after that she just got weird about sex every time. I also got real into my head about it, like you are. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, probably on both ends too.

But I've also come to realize, some times the body will go into self-preservation mode....IE, if a girl is giving you weird vibes or signals, your dick will be like "She's hot but do you really wanna deal with the mental baggage again?"
I genuinely think you're on the right tracks
I do get weird vibes from her. I find her attractive but that's kind of where it stops.

I've considered this before where my mind is subconsciously giving me signals and thats the root cause.
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post 1625617783 12-15-2020, 12:03 PM
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#27
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Originally Posted By smashedurgfx10
Why would I read it?
Youre saying nothing productive. Go outside man
I agree, it isn't productive- it's revealing, though. Dont you want situational awareness and not feign ignorance to whats actually happening?

What would be productive is understanding what I said and laying pipe really well to her friend and youre back on top. I wanted you to figure that out, though. I lead you to water, but now I'm making you drink it.
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post 1625619083 12-15-2020, 12:15 PM
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Originally Posted By BullittEV
I agree, it isn't productive- it's revealing, though. Dont you want situational awareness and not feign ignorance to whats actually happening?

What would be productive is understanding what I said and laying pipe really well to her friend and youre back on top. I wanted you to figure that out, though. I lead you to water, but now I'm making you drink it.
You sound 13.
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post 1625622003 12-15-2020, 12:47 PM
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Originally Posted By dolvioblue
You sound 13.
13 year olds are aware of the brutality of how chicks talk to each other and about laying pipe? Wut lol

Or was this some random insult that happened to be exactly what a 13 year old would say when not having a response. Ironic to say the least.
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post 1625634883 12-15-2020, 03:07 PM
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Originally Posted By BullittEV
13 year olds are aware of the brutality of how chicks talk to each other and about laying pipe? Wut lol

Or was this some random insult that happened to be exactly what a 13 year old would say when not having a response. Ironic to say the least.
Lol at you srs. 34 years old with the mentality of a child

Youre the epitome of whats wrong with society. Keep up the act though its amusing for all of us.
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