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Concluded its a bad idea to give your number out vs taking a girls number
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05-09-2022, 09:13 AM
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#1
- smashedurgfx10
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Concluded its a bad idea to give your number out vs taking a girls number
Cliffs
Met 2 chicks yesterday
Had good vibes with both of them
Gave my number to each one separately (I never usually do this, I always find a way to ask for theirs)
In this instance, the first one outright asked for it as we were talking, in order to send me something we were speaking about that she couldn't remember
The second one was working, and didn't want to make her feel awkward in front of co workers so just wrote my no. down and handed it to her as I left. Was much more interested in this one. As I handed it to her she seemed really receptive and lit up. Yet 24hrs later, still nothing.
I've come to the conclusion that it's a bad idea to do this, better to always get theirs so you're in charge of the convo and making the move. Anyone else have thoughts on this?
Also don't know what I did wrong as had good convo with both of them. The one I wrote my no down for, it was on an empty wrapper so it could have rubbed off, or maybe she couldn't read the writing. Dunno, clutching at straws.
Met 2 chicks yesterday
Had good vibes with both of them
Gave my number to each one separately (I never usually do this, I always find a way to ask for theirs)
In this instance, the first one outright asked for it as we were talking, in order to send me something we were speaking about that she couldn't remember
The second one was working, and didn't want to make her feel awkward in front of co workers so just wrote my no. down and handed it to her as I left. Was much more interested in this one. As I handed it to her she seemed really receptive and lit up. Yet 24hrs later, still nothing.
I've come to the conclusion that it's a bad idea to do this, better to always get theirs so you're in charge of the convo and making the move. Anyone else have thoughts on this?
Also don't know what I did wrong as had good convo with both of them. The one I wrote my no down for, it was on an empty wrapper so it could have rubbed off, or maybe she couldn't read the writing. Dunno, clutching at straws.
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05-09-2022, 09:46 AM
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#2
- KingBert
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- KingBert
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Next time in that work situation, ask for the sloots IG. That way it’s not uncomfortable but you’re still in control if she accepts your Follow.
If you don’t have an IG, which I don’t, then you’re going to have to build a semi-popular one so you show some social value.
If you don’t have an IG, which I don’t, then you’re going to have to build a semi-popular one so you show some social value.
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05-09-2022, 09:49 AM
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#3
- smashedurgfx10
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Originally Posted By KingBert⏩
Why this vs number thoughNext time in that work situation, ask for the sloots IG. That way it’s not uncomfortable but you’re still in control if she accepts your Follow.
If you don’t have an IG, which I don’t, then you’re going to have to build a semi-popular one so you show some social value.
If you don’t have an IG, which I don’t, then you’re going to have to build a semi-popular one so you show some social value.
I get what you're saying, it's less investment for her to give it out.
But in any case I'd rather a girl be more invested in me. If she isn't willing to give the number I see no reasoon
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05-09-2022, 10:32 AM
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#4
- smashedurgfx10
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Any ideas on what I could have done wrong to make them not message? Was it me just confusing politeness for interest? Making me wait on purpose? Have boyfriends? Makes sense for the 2nd but not the first, who offered her no.
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05-09-2022, 10:36 AM
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#5
- blueberryboy
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- blueberryboy
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Originally Posted By KingBert⏩
Lmao this is horrible adviceNext time in that work situation, ask for the sloots IG. That way it’s not uncomfortable but you’re still in control if she accepts your Follow.
If you don’t have an IG, which I don’t, then you’re going to have to build a semi-popular one so you show some social value.
If you don’t have an IG, which I don’t, then you’re going to have to build a semi-popular one so you show some social value.
Never accept a sloots IG
Phone # or BUST
Few weeks ago i got a girls ig we talked for a bit then she unfollowed me and thought i wouldnt notice and continue to be a fan boy
Ph #= personal
Ig = for simps
05-09-2022, 10:41 AM
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#6
- blueberryboy
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Originally Posted By KingBert⏩
Lmao so go through all that trouble / effort to build a popping ig page just to be a fan boyNext time in that work situation, ask for the sloots IG. That way it’s not uncomfortable but you’re still in control if she accepts your Follow.
If you don’t have an IG, which I don’t, then you’re going to have to build a semi-popular one so you show some social value.
If you don’t have an IG, which I don’t, then you’re going to have to build a semi-popular one so you show some social value.
Get the ph # and skip the social media BS
05-09-2022, 12:01 PM
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#7
- smashedurgfx10
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Originally Posted By blueberryboy⏩
agreed, but do you have anything to comment on my opLmao so go through all that trouble / effort to build a popping ig page just to be a fan boy
Get the ph # and skip the social media BS
Get the ph # and skip the social media BS
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05-09-2022, 12:08 PM
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#8
- Voidgaze
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- Voidgaze
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That has always been a terrible idea and it's hilarious how many "experienced" dudes have recommended this to me or continue to recommend this to other men.
Ladies don't like to feel as if the burden of breaking the ice or facilitating an interaction that leads to plans.
Men preach about leading and taking charge. Giving a woman your number is a great way to give the impression that you're unwilling to lead imo.
Ladies don't like to feel as if the burden of breaking the ice or facilitating an interaction that leads to plans.
Men preach about leading and taking charge. Giving a woman your number is a great way to give the impression that you're unwilling to lead imo.
05-09-2022, 12:11 PM
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#9
- smashedurgfx10
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Originally Posted By Voidgaze⏩
for sure, i always knew this was a bad idea but it has just reinforced it.That has always been a terrible idea and it's hilarious how many "experienced" dudes have recommended this to me or continue to recommend this to other men.
Ladies don't like to feel as if the burden of breaking the ice or facilitating an interaction that leads to plans.
Men preach about leading and taking charge. Giving a woman your number is a great way to give the impression that you're unwilling to lead imo.
Ladies don't like to feel as if the burden of breaking the ice or facilitating an interaction that leads to plans.
Men preach about leading and taking charge. Giving a woman your number is a great way to give the impression that you're unwilling to lead imo.
To be honest though, all she would have had to do it say 'hey it's x from x'
and that would be that .. the ice was already broken in person wasn't it
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05-09-2022, 12:43 PM
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#10
- Voidgaze
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Originally Posted By smashedurgfx10⏩
I agree, but remember you're trying to apply logic to female behavior. For us it should be simple since texting after a conversation would be a warm approach, but we're talking about a demographic that considers being in the same room and making 0.8 seconds of eye contact an "approach".To be honest though, all she would have had to do it say 'hey it's x from x'
and that would be that .. the ice was already broken in person wasn't it
and that would be that .. the ice was already broken in person wasn't it
05-09-2022, 12:57 PM
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#11
- blueberryboy
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Nothing wrong with leaving your # but i reckon taking theirs is better.
When you leave yours...you are counting on them to follow up / make a move
Take theirs = you aren't leaving it up to pure chance they will reach out.
I used to be incredibly passive with females and wait for them to make a move. As i got a bit older i realized as a man you should pursue and lead . We have to do the work most times starting off
Props for being brave enough to go out there and pursue. Any women you find not on a dating app is gonna be way less of a headache brah
When you leave yours...you are counting on them to follow up / make a move
Take theirs = you aren't leaving it up to pure chance they will reach out.
I used to be incredibly passive with females and wait for them to make a move. As i got a bit older i realized as a man you should pursue and lead . We have to do the work most times starting off
Props for being brave enough to go out there and pursue. Any women you find not on a dating app is gonna be way less of a headache brah
05-09-2022, 11:03 PM
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#12
- KingBert
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- KingBert
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Look, giving your number is limp wristed weakness. This is the worst option because it makes the woman take initiative. If the girl has to take initiative they feel like a desperate sloot. So they likely will not text you.
Asking for her number at work puts her in a compromising position. If she works for tips, she feels pressured to give a number. If she doesn't work for tips and its a professional environment, it looks bad if she's giving out her number and you're typing it in front of everyone. It looks bad in front of other customers too.
I think IG or a snapchat is a good middle ground. I think snapchat is considered juvenile now or maybe its fallen out of favor in my age group so IG would be better than snapchat. That being said, I personally don't have an IG and have never done this so maybe you guys know that they are farming for followers but... you're the one who took the initiative to ask her so that may be what rejection looks like instead of a public rejection in front of the business customers.
But asking for her number when she is trying to make customers happy and still has professional expectations from her boss, is pure cringe pathetic behavior. Congratulations, you trapped her.
Go to restaurants and ask for their numbers before getting the bill. If they don't give you a number, tip them $0 for their work. LMAO.
Asking for her number at work puts her in a compromising position. If she works for tips, she feels pressured to give a number. If she doesn't work for tips and its a professional environment, it looks bad if she's giving out her number and you're typing it in front of everyone. It looks bad in front of other customers too.
I think IG or a snapchat is a good middle ground. I think snapchat is considered juvenile now or maybe its fallen out of favor in my age group so IG would be better than snapchat. That being said, I personally don't have an IG and have never done this so maybe you guys know that they are farming for followers but... you're the one who took the initiative to ask her so that may be what rejection looks like instead of a public rejection in front of the business customers.
But asking for her number when she is trying to make customers happy and still has professional expectations from her boss, is pure cringe pathetic behavior. Congratulations, you trapped her.
Go to restaurants and ask for their numbers before getting the bill. If they don't give you a number, tip them $0 for their work. LMAO.
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05-10-2022, 02:29 AM
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#13
- smashedurgfx10
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Originally Posted By KingBert⏩
Look, giving your number is limp wristed weakness.
Originally Posted By KingBert⏩
Youre contradicting yourself, you're basically saying i shouldn't ask for a girls number or give mine out.Asking for her number at work puts her in a compromising position.
And no, I'm not gonna not go after a girl just cos she's working. I'd rather make a fool of myself and take a chance vs not doing anything.
Originally Posted By KingBert⏩
I didn't ask for her number though did I, so how was I compromising her.But asking for her number when she is trying to make customers happy and still has professional expectations from her boss, is pure cringe pathetic behavior. Congratulations, you trapped her.
You sound mad af for some reason and it was a stupid post for the reasons I mentioned above. At least stick to one coherent argument
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05-10-2022, 02:39 AM
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#14
- smashedurgfx10
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Originally Posted By blueberryboy⏩
I agree. I just thought in this situation it was less pressure to leave mine, seeing as customers were aroundNothing wrong with leaving your # but i reckon taking theirs is better.
When you leave yours...you are counting on them to follow up / make a move
Take theirs = you aren't leaving it up to pure chance they will reach out.
I used to be incredibly passive with females and wait for them to make a move. As i got a bit older i realized as a man you should pursue and lead . We have to do the work most times starting off
Props for being brave enough to go out there and pursue. Any women you find not on a dating app is gonna be way less of a headache brah
When you leave yours...you are counting on them to follow up / make a move
Take theirs = you aren't leaving it up to pure chance they will reach out.
I used to be incredibly passive with females and wait for them to make a move. As i got a bit older i realized as a man you should pursue and lead . We have to do the work most times starting off
Props for being brave enough to go out there and pursue. Any women you find not on a dating app is gonna be way less of a headache brah
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05-10-2022, 09:49 AM
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#15
- Ninshark
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I see what you're saying, and I've thought that too, but in the end, it doesn't matter. Even if you got her number, she will just ghost you. The only difference is that you might be able to get 1-2 texts in that she'd prob send 1-word responses to. If she were interested in you, she would respond well when you text her, or she would text you if she had your number.
Also, suppose there were a chance that the girl, despite being interested, would have a lower chance of initiating contact with your number, than responding to a text if you got her number instead. Then is this a girl that you should settle for? Are you content with this girl just being your turn and not your girl? Because that's literally what it is. A girl who wouldn't text you if she had your number, but would respond if you had her number - is opportunistic, and this right here opportunity is your turn; hence, she is not your girl. Is this "your turn" girl what you want? Well, I guess if you're just looking for a hookup, then you'd be right, get her number instead and control the convo.
Also, suppose there were a chance that the girl, despite being interested, would have a lower chance of initiating contact with your number, than responding to a text if you got her number instead. Then is this a girl that you should settle for? Are you content with this girl just being your turn and not your girl? Because that's literally what it is. A girl who wouldn't text you if she had your number, but would respond if you had her number - is opportunistic, and this right here opportunity is your turn; hence, she is not your girl. Is this "your turn" girl what you want? Well, I guess if you're just looking for a hookup, then you'd be right, get her number instead and control the convo.
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05-10-2022, 10:52 AM
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#16
- KingBert
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Originally Posted By smashedurgfx10⏩
Look you goof, don’t get your panties up your snatch and neg me just because I laid out your options in a hierarchy - that’s not contradiction, there are pros and cons to everything.Youre contradicting yourself, you're basically saying i shouldn't ask for a girls number or give mine out.
And no, I'm not gonna not go after a girl just cos she's working. I'd rather make a fool of myself and take a chance vs not doing anything.
I didn't ask for her number though did I, so how was I compromising her.
You sound mad af for some reason and it was a stupid post for the reasons I mentioned above. At least stick to one coherent argument
And no, I'm not gonna not go after a girl just cos she's working. I'd rather make a fool of myself and take a chance vs not doing anything.
I didn't ask for her number though did I, so how was I compromising her.
You sound mad af for some reason and it was a stupid post for the reasons I mentioned above. At least stick to one coherent argument
1) Ask for IG (best option. If she wants to use you for followers then that’s just how rejection looks like in such a case as opposed to asking for a number)
2) Ask for her number at work (cringe because you’re trapping her and making every stakeholder in the business uncomfortable but can be effective. This used to be the way to go before social media)
3) Give your number for her to take initiative and write the opener (inversion of female/male dynamic, limp wristed weakness, 90% chance of failure, worst option but at least she feels safe)
Other bad options would be to directly ask when she gets off so you can return when she is off her shift and keep talking, or ask her coworkers to set you up. This is why social media is best these days.
Ironic username to post content ratio, playa.
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05-10-2022, 11:25 AM
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#17
- smashedurgfx10
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Originally Posted By KingBert⏩
Didn't read srsLook you goof, don’t get your panties up your snatch and neg me just because I laid out your options in a hierarchy - that’s not contradiction, there are pros and cons to everything.
1) Ask for IG (best option. If she wants to use you for followers then that’s just how rejection looks like in such a case as opposed to asking for a number)
2) Ask for her number at work (cringe because you’re trapping her and making every stakeholder in the business uncomfortable but can be effective. This used to be the way to go before social media)
3) Give your number for her to take initiative and write the opener (inversion of female/male dynamic, limp wristed weakness, 90% chance of failure, worst option but at least she feels safe)
Other bad options would be to directly ask when she gets off so you can return when she is off her shift and keep talking, or ask her coworkers to set you up. This is why social media is best these days.
Ironic username to post content ratio, playa.
1) Ask for IG (best option. If she wants to use you for followers then that’s just how rejection looks like in such a case as opposed to asking for a number)
2) Ask for her number at work (cringe because you’re trapping her and making every stakeholder in the business uncomfortable but can be effective. This used to be the way to go before social media)
3) Give your number for her to take initiative and write the opener (inversion of female/male dynamic, limp wristed weakness, 90% chance of failure, worst option but at least she feels safe)
Other bad options would be to directly ask when she gets off so you can return when she is off her shift and keep talking, or ask her coworkers to set you up. This is why social media is best these days.
Ironic username to post content ratio, playa.
You are talking out your ass
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05-10-2022, 11:28 AM
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#18
- smashedurgfx10
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Originally Posted By Ninshark⏩
Yeah you make a fair point manI see what you're saying, and I've thought that too, but in the end, it doesn't matter. Even if you got her number, she will just ghost you. The only difference is that you might be able to get 1-2 texts in that she'd prob send 1-word responses to. If she were interested in you, she would respond well when you text her, or she would text you if she had your number.
Also, suppose there were a chance that the girl, despite being interested, would have a lower chance of initiating contact with your number, than responding to a text if you got her number instead. Then is this a girl that you should settle for? Are you content with this girl just being your turn and not your girl? Because that's literally what it is. A girl who wouldn't text you if she had your number, but would respond if you had her number - is opportunistic, and this right here opportunity is your turn; hence, she is not your girl. Is this "your turn" girl what you want? Well, I guess if you're just looking for a hookup, then you'd be right, get her number instead and control the convo.
Also, suppose there were a chance that the girl, despite being interested, would have a lower chance of initiating contact with your number, than responding to a text if you got her number instead. Then is this a girl that you should settle for? Are you content with this girl just being your turn and not your girl? Because that's literally what it is. A girl who wouldn't text you if she had your number, but would respond if you had her number - is opportunistic, and this right here opportunity is your turn; hence, she is not your girl. Is this "your turn" girl what you want? Well, I guess if you're just looking for a hookup, then you'd be right, get her number instead and control the convo.
The fact she didn't initiate goes to show the interest wasn't there regardless. And as you say if I had hers, it'd just be a case of an uphill battle
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05-10-2022, 11:34 AM
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#19
- Muzzlrpress
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Sloots gon sloot
I'm back, bitches!
05-10-2022, 11:39 AM
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#20
- smashedurgfx10
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Originally Posted By Muzzlrpress⏩
Youre not wrongSloots gon sloot
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05-11-2022, 12:19 AM
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#21
- KingBert
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Originally Posted By smashedurgfx10⏩
She didn’t text back because you’re more sensitive than her.Didn't read srs
You are talking out your ass
You are talking out your ass
If you think your dating luck is going to change based on who gives the phone number… I got some bad newz bruh.
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05-12-2022, 06:33 PM
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#22
- Caldef
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Yep you should definitely get her number and contact her first, it feels desperate for a girl to reach out first
But having said that how long has it been? She might be following three day rule so as to not appear desperate, so you might still get a text
Agree that following them on insta is weak, it reduces you to one follower out of many and whereas picking up the phone and ringing her to ask her out is a big turn on, leaving lame messages about how pretty her pics are is just ugh.
Good luck and I hope you hear from her soon. And in the future don't leave the ball in her court. Women don't really like chasing men, it goes against biology.
But having said that how long has it been? She might be following three day rule so as to not appear desperate, so you might still get a text
Agree that following them on insta is weak, it reduces you to one follower out of many and whereas picking up the phone and ringing her to ask her out is a big turn on, leaving lame messages about how pretty her pics are is just ugh.
Good luck and I hope you hear from her soon. And in the future don't leave the ball in her court. Women don't really like chasing men, it goes against biology.
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