Seeing my parents getting older hurts, can’t imagine what I’ll do after they’re gone

They fulfilled their purpose.

It would not impact emotionally at all. It would not impact me in any way. I may not even know when it happens.

Be there soon

I’ve been mentally preparing for my dad to go for the past few years. He’s only 51, but he’s had three massive strokes in the last 12 months, at least a half dozen TIAs, an infection that led to an amputation and he was diagnosed with near total blockage of his carotid arteries. Ded fkin srs.

Unfortunately he’s also a T1 diabetic and chose not to take care of his health (alcoholism and poor blood glucose management will catch up). Even though he’s stable and pretty strong considering what he’s been through, not a single day goes by where I don’t brace for a call that the worst has happened.

It breaks my heart to know I have a relatively young parent, yet chances are I will likely never be able to share great memories with him in the prime of my life. I watch YouTube videos of guys in their 20s and 30s going on these once in a lifetime vacations with their dads and it makes me depressed. Likewise, he may never know his grandkids. It actually makes me less inclined to have children of my own.

My mom on the other hand is extremely healthy. She will probably live for another 40+ years, but she has mental issues (bipolar + type A personality) and I can only deal with her for a few days at a time. We live 500 miles away from each other anyway and sadly will never be close like I am with my old man.

My dad dying was a massive meh because I hadn't spoken to the man in almost ten years. I went to see him when he was dying in the hospital just to make sure I had no regrets, but he died a sad old man who provided literally nothing for me for the past twenty years of my life.

The only thing my mother could do for me is die earlier so I could actually inherit something. I have no positive relationship with her at all.

"We all know how to get through them," Munger said. "The great philosophers of realism are also the great philosophers of what I call soldiering through. If you soldier through, you can get through almost anything. And it's your only option."

https://www.benzinga.com/personal-finance/management/26/01/49826288/billionaire-charlie-munger-99-said-lifes-struggles-are-inevitable-you-just-have-to-soldier-through-go-ahead-and-cry-but-you-cant-quit

My grandparents all lived to their mid-90s, so hopefully I have at least 30 more years before I have to find out the answer to this question; I know it'll hurt, but I'm blessed to have had plenty of happy years with them so far and more to come.

It's the same as when a friend dies or you break up from a serious relationship

A few days of anguish then you move on. Thoughts afterwards are mixed with good memories, mild sadness, nostalgia, etc

After parents die they will become spiritual beings and time works different in that realm

They can see your past

They can see all the nasty sexual things you did.

Then when you die you will meet them again.

In fact they are watching over you until you die so that means they watch you have sex everytime live until you die

Literal cope.


Feel that shit. Give it the attention it deserves. Then move on.

My mom died last month. Just came back from her funeral on Friday.