It is within my nature to be empathetic. It is very easy for me to put myself in other people’s shoes/head/feelings, which seems to be not the norm in men.

Men seem to just say straight facts without much care of what the recipient might feel in response.

Majority of the time I lean towards being nice and not being disagreeable/saying what I truly think, because I am empathetic and able to predict that the person might feel bad when I say what I truly think.

Will I gain more respect if I outright say what I truly think? Even if it may be brutal and mean? How do I know when to be nice/spare peoples feelings and when to be brutally honest?

Example, there is a fat guy at work who is also a simp for this other girl at work. He made a quick joke/jab at me in front of the girl. I wanted to say how much of a simp and ugly and fat he is, but would feel bad that I might hurt his feelings.

Jesus Christ, I hate being empathetic and need to change my brain to not care about people.

I need to assert myself more. It seems I am making it a more delicate procedure that I overthink.

Dark triad is a thing. But the more you try to intellectualize and self actualize changes to your behavior the more autistic you will feel.

We evolved based on instinct

Don’t be a dick but don’t be a doormat either

Yea don’t go full on dikhead, doubt you’d like yourself. I’m like you, I’m overly empathic even at times I shouldn’t be and they don’t deserve to be treated nice. I also can 180 and go straight brutal a-hole but they really have to work to get me to act in that matter. Just be cool until you notice they’re they I g to mistake your kindness for weaknesss. Then prove them wrong by putting your foot down.

Selfish people will ask you to be selfish. Whenever they ask you to sacrifice on your end while offering no benefit nor sacrifice on their end, you have a narcissist and if you won't give in they will tell you to be empathetic or accuse you of being greedy, or non-empathetic. Being a selfish SOB has it's benefits, but can you sleep at night? I can be empathetic, sometimes too much, but when I sense someone trying to get one over on me I pull back hard.