Bros the thought of having my wedding is giving me a panic attack

10-31-2021, 10:29 AM

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#1

johnnyboi123
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Bros the thought of having my wedding is giving me a panic attack

As somebody who suffers from severe social anxiety, I can't imagine being the center of attention in a wedding ceremony/reception with 100+ people in attendance. Would you just elope? Not that im close to being married, but i did meet this chick who i really like and she likes me so these scenarios are running through my head already.

10-31-2021, 10:31 AM

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#2

heyquikquestion
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Have 5-6 beers before the ceremony to calm you down. That's what I did and it was great.

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10-31-2021, 10:32 AM

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#3

BrooksKoepka

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It helps if you pretend you’re an actor and you’re playing the role of a fearless alpha. This actually helps in a pinch for big events. I’ll revert back to my beta ways behind closed doors and around the people I fully trust.

10-31-2021, 10:42 AM

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#4

Ikarsuz1337
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just take some beta blockers, saw a documentary about big pharma and there were some orchestra players saying they took it and it eliminated their stage fright/performance anxiety

10-31-2021, 10:49 AM

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#5

AncientYouth
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who would get married in 2021...........

10-31-2021, 10:49 AM

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#6

BrianDaMan
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imagine the panic attack when you get the first alimony bill

10-31-2021, 10:51 AM

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#7

Briisk
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Originally Posted By BrianDaMan⏩

imagine the panic attack when you get the first alimony bill

lol

Divert all the attention to your wife

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10-31-2021, 11:34 AM

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#8

Kaliconic
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I've thought about this a lot. For me it's not just the social anxiety, but the stress of all my extended family judging me for the girl I'm marrying. It's terrifying to me. Plus I have no close friends so the groomsmen and all that would be an impossibility. I believe in religious marriage, but not the absurd, bloated tribute to narcissism weddings are now. I would want to get married in front of a priest with a few witnesses and the absolute minimum of fuss, but good luck finding a girl down with that. It's one of the reasons I have a hard time seeing myself ever getting married.

10-31-2021, 11:37 AM

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#9

WHYCANTILIFT
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same, i dont have anxiety but i absolutely do not like attention. I hate having to pretend to care about other people and have conversations with them. but i dont plan on getting married unless theres a prenup.

not that i could anyway lmfao

10-31-2021, 11:39 AM

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#10

Visel
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The main reasons I never want to get married:

1) Scared of wedding (same as what OP says), it's also very expensive and gotta buy honeymoon/anniversaries/rings

2) Make myself vulnerable to divorce and its costs / alimony

3) She might let herself go now that shes locked you in

4) Piggybacking off of #3, she might change over time personality wise for the worse, and then you either have to adapt to like her then, put up with it, or divorce and receive the problems of #2.

Literally those 4 things are why I hate the idea of marriage.

10-31-2021, 11:40 AM

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#11

lightsarefallin
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Shotgun a couple cold ones leading up to it and loosen up. Calm down, have a smoke. Couple tokes of good indo and you'll be golden dead fkn srs.

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10-31-2021, 07:40 PM

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#12

ZeroPercentTip
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Originally Posted By johnnyboi123⏩

As somebody who suffers from severe social anxiety, I can't imagine being the center of attention in a wedding ceremony/reception with 100+ people in attendance. Would you just elope? Not that im close to being married, but i did meet this chick who i really like and she likes me so these scenarios are running through my head already.

if it makes you feel any better bro the scenario of her meeting any guy she finds remotely better than you and leaving you for him is probably running through her mind

10-31-2021, 07:44 PM

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#13

andrew28
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I absolutely dread the day of my own wedding if I ever get married.

I had to do my best man’s speech for my older brother’s wedding and I absolutely crushed it and had a room full of 300+ people laughing their asses off. But the anxiety leading up to it in the weeks/months before it was soul-crushing. But the second I started my speech, the anxiety nearly vanished. It was all anticipatory anxiety. Kinda like how war veterans say the fear comes before the battle but shuts off once it starts.

I hope to god my wedding is super low key.

I’ve heard some refreshing thoughts from girls about weddings in the past few years. Some of them are starting to realize how much of a scam they are and would rather go on 2-3 honeymoon vacations rather than one event most people pretend they’re happy to be at.

10-31-2021, 07:55 PM

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#14

DSTEE
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Just take some beta blockers

10-31-2021, 07:56 PM

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#15

northernlights7
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Originally Posted By BrianDaMan⏩

imagine the panic attack when you get the first alimony bill

Not to be a prick OP, but this guy has a point. Even though I'm an introverted miscer, the worst part about my wedding to me was getting big time butterflies in my stomach when I was exchanging marriage vows with my ex. Was basically locked in eye contact with her for the entire vows/ring exchange/etc. process. Not out of nervousness so much as feeling extremely happy in that moment.

Also chit the bed slightly when having to do my addressing of the wedding guests at the reception, but it could have been way worse. One of my buddies bombed way worse than I did, so it made me look better too lol.

But back to the point. Good luck and everything, but just remember that marriage is basically a coin flip at best these days. Let me tell you, hearing her tell you she wants a divorce/serving you divorce papers and the entire process/aftermath of a divorce is going to absolutely dwarf any stress the wedding itself causes you - other than financial stress of a wedding, I felt pretty cucked even at the time when seeing the bills we racked up on rings, her dress, renting a nice tux for myself, the ceremony, and reception bullchit lol.

10-31-2021, 08:11 PM

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#16

Eatforgains
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Originally Posted By johnnyboi123⏩

As somebody who suffers from severe social anxiety, I can't imagine being the center of attention in a wedding ceremony/reception with 100+ people in attendance. Would you just elope? Not that im close to being married, but i did meet this chick who i really like and she likes me so these scenarios are running through my head already.

You can send me half of your stuff now if you wanna skip to the ending.