M&Ms going woke and having less sexists M&M characters

Clown word

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.cbs...ressive-world/

The green M&M and the brown M&M will have a more friendly relationship, showcasing a "force supporting women." The two characters' dynamic will have them "together throwing shine and not shade," the company said. The two characters have sometimes been at odds in advertisements, but they have also been seen as friends — or more than friends in others, like this viral tweet from 2015 showing the two holding hands on a beach.

Mars also added that the brown M&M's heels will be lowered to a professional heel height

Just imagine people actually get paid to come up with this stuff.

Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.
Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.
I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theatre of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.
Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.
When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."
This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.

Honk honk

they took green's fuk me boots... sad

Imagine actually paying extra just to buy the same product just with marketing behind it

Some of these changes -- removing the high heels and making one M&M kinder --- are ok.

The only one that cringy is the elimination of pronouns "so that people will focus on the character, not their gender"

people offended by M&Ms and people concerned with offending people with candy are both garbage humans

lol @ changing the order of brown. too much lul