went out to get yucky with the boys so we go to this dive bar on the outskirts of town. at this point in the night we were already sauced up so we thought we'd wind down the night and weren't gonna drink that much. well that went right out the fukkin window when we showed up to this empty bar with this string bean kid sitting at the corner of the bar. so we go up to the bar and get our beers, i sat down next to the kid. i look over and this kids just sweating swiping through apps on his phone checked the weather like 4 times then flipped between the notes app and snapchat, i noticed his last snap was 4 days ago.

"hey man you seen any hot broads come in?" i asked
he just does this side-eye look at me and mutters out a "n-nah man".
i thought alright man maybe if i buy him a beer he'll chill out a bit and brighten up.
i ask the kid "well what are ya drinkin i'll buy you a beer"
the kid just turns bright red, veins bulging out of every inch of his neck and forehead
slowly turns his head
we make eye contact
he blinks with one eye
then blurts out "HAHHHHH YOU BUY MEEEE A BEEEER? MEEEEEEEEEE? A BEERRRRRRRRRRRRR????? NO ILL BUUYYY YOUUUUU A BEEEEER ILL BUYYY YOU ALLLLLLLL A BEEEEER"
everyone in the bar goes dead quiet just looking at us i think fukk this kid looks zooted off his nib were gonna get kicked out
i say thanks man as my friends start cheering and thanking him
"fukk yeah man thanks for the free beer!"
"well can't turn down a free beer! haha"
"AWESOME!"

before i could even turn back around towards him i just see him shuffling away throwing some crumpled up bills at the bartender and muttering something about biden and lab rats

turns out the idiot tossed the bartender a hundo so the bartender gave us 2 more rounds afterwards on him lmao what an idiot

Poor guy, obviously hasn’t talked to a soul in years, probably forgot how to act…I know those awkward feels tho

Nice guy buys you and your mates a few rounds

You go into his safe space and call him an idiot

Poor chap

lol reminds me of this kid that used to go down the local bar in my town that has this bell that when you ring it you buy everyone in the bar a shot/drink

he'd ring that bell 3 or 4 times a night and probably drop $400 buying everyone drinks

You stared at the dude's phone long enough to see him check the weather 4 times and swipe through multiple apps?

Is this an aware thread or are you just really creepy OP?

Ratfish, when will he ever learn.

kid was just flippin thru apps so fast i dont think he even saw anything pop up