after reading this article i have every single one of the symptoms. bordering sociopathy i would imagine.

https://www.healthline.com/health/me...ms-in-children

And makes sense, i was the last born child of 4. father never interacted with me and mother always berated me. my older sister (3rd born) had alot of mental issues and had all attention focused on her, i dont blame her of course as it wasn't her fauly she had undiagnosed nut allergy and celiac syndrome which the symptoms drove her to self harm because of the pain.


needless to say i iz fuked

and if any parents are reading this, love your children and take part in their life or they'll end up like this miscer

did you know that first born children are smartest

awfuk guess i dumb dumb

According to a recent study from the National Bureau of Economic Research (NBER), firstborn children do better than their younger siblings in school. Correspondingly, numerous studies have shown that firstborns are generally more intelligent and score higher on IQ tests.

Everyone was, you're not special.

There isn't much you can do about it now, aside from trying to re-engineer your brain the best you can.

Sorry to hear that OP. This world is very cruel

maybe first bon was aborted

i feel like i need to give you a hug. not everyone was, if you were actually neglected it makes you a part of the minority

You were probably going to develop close to who you are now, even if your situation was different, so it isn't like you were denied a big part of your potential.

It would be a mistake, IMO, to choose to feel sorry for yourself now.

Fix what you can, and accept the rest.

im sorry op,

have you tried therapy at all?

This. Hope you wern't looking to have a pity party OP.

no, actually just hoping to hear others that had similar life to me. so i know im not alone

i couldnt afford it if i even wanted it. therapy is more for women anyway

same, don't want to bore people with a tl;dr story, but it was bad. which turned into some pretty serious codependency issues. I just got out of a 6 year relationship with an extremely toxic BPD girl a month ago. BPD/codependents are like ****ing magnets, a match made in hell. I don't think "normal" people can deal with either, and both are so strongly attracted and need eachother. I just learned the story about my fcuked up very early childhood a couple of years ago, and resent the shiet out my parents for it. I'm trying to work on my issues now, but it's fcuking tough boyos.

Let me play you the worlds smallest violin you big time queer bait.

I'm sorry OP.

Have you tried fisting yourself?

This. Quit trying to find an excuse. Do what you can now.

Honestly I think me and my bro were too. My dad would beat us like we were in a boxing ring for the simplest things. My grandmother was Ukrainian and was always screaming in our faces. My mom really had nazis in her family and was the most strict. We could never talk to our parents as like friends or anything. My mom would cook food and watch us eat with a spoon in her hand. Would smack us if we didn’t eat. We eventually had to wash our own clothes, cook own food, do lists of chores etc or we would be beat. No one could even come in the house without being looked over and asked a million questions. My mom would call all of my gf wh97es to their faces. I think it led to a lot of revolting and craziness in my life growing up. It’s weird now because today they are notjing line that but I would say it was close to being like that movie the people under the stairs. Like they even bailed us in our rooms at night. Like no lie. Sone days made us study all day and would un nail us to feed us. Like we were 100% their Property. Now that I think about it Jesus 😅

OP I was over nurtured, and because of that I grew up being a pussy . I wish I had it rough when I was young , as it would have made me street smart and provided with other important life lessons .

I actually was in a gang growing up. Didn’t get into the whole throwing up signs or cars about much but the guys in it could get things. They had smokes, alcohol, weed, pills. Even fang banged a few chicks. I didn’t have a car or preppy friends so it was good at the time. One day I ran into sone guys I knew through sone people and he robbed the darn store while I was with him and I had no idea that was going on. I ran home and found a job and never went ba k to that crap

I always thought younger kids advanced faster because they had sibling to mimic.

wrong. srs

first 1-7 years of life can definitely shape your future in massive ways.

early trauma can stay with you until you are an adult. something people who grew up in healthy households will never understand.

the key is a healthy balance.

imagine being "under nurtured", struggling to eat as a young child, never being able to develop self-esteem because of your environment, having extremely high stress as a young child, etc

Go transgender out of spite as revenge on them.