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Forum » I've Never Used A Bidet But I Can't Iamgine How It's Better Than Baby Wipes
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Thread: I've Never Used A Bidet But I Can't Iamgine How It's Better Than Baby Wipes

post 1691539953 10-12-2023, 07:01 AM
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I've Never Used A Bidet But I Can't Iamgine How It's Better Than Baby Wipes

I feel thats fake news srs

When I use baby wipes on my ass, my ass is 100% spotless. No way some tiny water hose for a few seconds is gonna beat that
post 1691540083 10-12-2023, 07:05 AM
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It won’t clog up your plumbing
post 1691540103 10-12-2023, 07:06 AM
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Baby wipes smear the chit around still.

Bidet blasts it away with a high pressure stream. No contest.

Even the standard Bum Gun is much better than wipes.
post 1691540253 10-12-2023, 07:09 AM
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Originally Posted By OliverHeldens⏩
Baby wipes smear the chit around still.
I aint buying this. Why is it that the first wipe is brown and then the next wipe(s) are completely clean? pls go
Originally Posted By OliverHeldens⏩
Bidet blasts it away with a high pressure stream. No contest.

Even the standard Bum Gun is much better than wipes.
Guarantee if I applied a baby wipe to a bitches ass after she used a bidet I'd still find chit on it
post 1691540313 10-12-2023, 07:11 AM
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Originally Posted By Vhagar⏩
It won’t clog up your plumbing
Been tossed 1000's of baby wipes down the toilet for years and NEVER had a single issue. Even if I get an issue after 15 years, its a small price to pay
post 1691540353 10-12-2023, 07:11 AM
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It's a nice stream to your ass and feels the same as your mom licking my ******* bish.
post 1691540393 10-12-2023, 07:12 AM
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1. Get handheld shower nozzle

2. Turn it to "Jet"

3. Rinse and repeat... literally.

4. Profit?
It's a hot night. The mind races. You think about your knife: the only friend who hasn't betrayed you, the only friend who won't be dead by sunup. Sleep tight mates, in your quilted chambray night shirts.
post 1691540413 10-12-2023, 07:12 AM
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Originally Posted By RayvenJustice⏩
I aint buying this. Why is it that the first wipe is brown and then the next wipe(s) are completely clean? pls go

Guarantee if I applied a baby wipe to a bitches ass after she used a bidet I'd still find chit on it
you don't - cause you wipe once or twice with paper to dry after the bidet - nothing there 95% of the time
post 1691540483 10-12-2023, 07:13 AM
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Bro.


I first tried a bidet when I was in the airport in Tokyo. It beat the chit out of every other ass-cleaning method I've ever used. The bidet even had different force and position settings, it starts at around your buttcrack and the last position ends around the middle of your gooch.

At the maximum force it could even scratch a blazing ass-hole itch I had from a long flight. It was soooo good. I sat on the toilet for 20 minutes plus, in a state of pure ass-hole pleasure.

Except, one button I pushed was a female setting and I didn't clue onto that at first, and it sprayed a jet of water onto my nuts and startled me. It's for chicks to douche out their pussies.



Bidet crew all the way. Japanese are way ahead of us here.
Back off, Warchild.

Seriously.
post 1691540583 10-12-2023, 07:15 AM
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Originally Posted By Bodhy⏩
Bro.


I first tried a bidet when I was in the airport in Tokyo. It beat the chit out of every other ass-cleaning method I've ever used. The bidet even had different force and position settings, it starts at around your buttcrack and the last position ends around the middle of your gooch.

At the maximum force it could even scratch a blazing ass-hole itch I had from a long flight. It was soooo good. I sat on the toilet for 20 minutes plus, in a state of pure ass-hole pleasure.

Except, one button I pushed was a female setting and I didn't clue onto that at first, and it sprayed a jet of water onto my nuts and startled me. It's for chicks to douche out their pussies.



Bidet crew all the way. Japanese are way ahead of us here.
Of all people... You.

It's a hot night. The mind races. You think about your knife: the only friend who hasn't betrayed you, the only friend who won't be dead by sunup. Sleep tight mates, in your quilted chambray night shirts.
post 1691540593 10-12-2023, 07:15 AM
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Originally Posted By LuigiMiami631⏩
It's a nice stream to your ass and feels the same as your mom licking my ******* bish.
Thats your second favourite feeling in the world, first is your dad fukin your ass
post 1691540653 10-12-2023, 07:16 AM
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Originally Posted By Bushmaster⏩
1. Get handheld shower nozzle

2. Turn it to "Jet"

3. Rinse and repeat... literally.

4. Profit?
There's no way thats getting rid of all the chit, I'm not buying it seriously. Yall have probably got crustaceans up in your ass and mad dingleberrys
post 1691540733 10-12-2023, 07:17 AM
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Originally Posted By Bodhy⏩
Bro.


I first tried a bidet when I was in the airport in Tokyo. It beat the chit out of every other ass-cleaning method I've ever used. The bidet even had different force and position settings, it starts at around your buttcrack and the last position ends around the middle of your gooch.

At the maximum force it could even scratch a blazing ass-hole itch I had from a long flight. It was soooo good. I sat on the toilet for 20 minutes plus, in a state of pure ass-hole pleasure.

Except, one button I pushed was a female setting and I didn't clue onto that at first, and it sprayed a jet of water onto my nuts and startled me. It's for chicks to douche out their pussies.



Bidet crew all the way. Japanese are way ahead of us here.
Well damn
post 1691540753 10-12-2023, 07:17 AM
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Originally Posted By RayvenJustice⏩
There's no way thats getting rid of all the chit, I'm not buying it seriously. Yall have probably got crustaceans up in your ass and mad dingleberrys
Cleveland had the answer bro.. don't take my word for it though, put it to the test.
Originally Posted By Cleveland33⏩
you don't - cause you wipe once or twice with paper to dry after the bidet - nothing there 95% of the time
It's a hot night. The mind races. You think about your knife: the only friend who hasn't betrayed you, the only friend who won't be dead by sunup. Sleep tight mates, in your quilted chambray night shirts.
post 1691540883 10-12-2023, 07:19 AM
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Originally Posted By Bushmaster⏩
Cleveland had the answer bro.. don't take my word for it though, put it to the test.
Missed that post, TY
Originally Posted By Cleveland33⏩
you don't - cause you wipe once or twice with paper to dry after the bidet - nothing there 95% of the time
Interesting. Maybe bidet + baby wipe is the way forward.
post 1691540963 10-12-2023, 07:21 AM
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Originally Posted By RayvenJustice⏩
I feel thats fake news srs

When I use baby wipes on my ass, my ass is 100% spotless. No way some tiny water hose for a few seconds is gonna beat that
Just lol if you don’t put the wipe over your index finger and push it in to your knuckle.
I loe e.
post 1691541003 10-12-2023, 07:21 AM
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I lived in Rome for a bit and the condo I was living in had a bidet and literally no TP. I decided to try it out. You're basically bathing your soiled bunghole with a cool jet of ancient water there. I guess you wipe yourself off with a towel. Honestly, it was odd. I wouldn't get one. It's a bit weird getting wet. It does make you purely clean, though. But baby wipes are just as effective, honestly. Overall, if you get so irreparably filthy when you take a dump that you wipe and wipe and it's like wiping a marker or the fuking frosting off a birthday cake, you should really consider exploring your diet.

Ghost schits are the best schits.
*Look at reflection in car window and flex every time crew*
*Use half the roll to wipe after a poo crew*
*Fart in the gym and blame rotten smell on faulty ventilation crew*
*Fart at home and blame it on the dog crew*
*Watch neutron-star density poop mock me as water flushes around it and it stays put crew*
*Drive 2 minutes in the summer and back of shirt gets completely wet crew*
*Coffee black as midnight on a moonless night crew*
*Fat shame my cat on a daily basis crew*
post 1691541243 10-12-2023, 07:26 AM
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Originally Posted By Redfish225⏩
Just lol if you don’t put the wipe over your index finger and push it in to your knuckle.
Yeah i do that too, I dont get on no freaky chit but I put my finger in my ass a little bit

post 1691541373 10-12-2023, 07:27 AM
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Originally Posted By lightsarefallin⏩
I lived in Rome for a bit and the condo I was living in had a bidet and literally no TP. I decided to try it out. You're basically bathing your soiled bunghole with a cool jet of ancient water there. I guess you wipe yourself off with a towel. Honestly, it was odd. I wouldn't get one. It's a bit weird getting wet. It does make you purely clean, though. But baby wipes are just as effective, honestly. Overall, if you get so irreparably filthy when you take a dump that you wipe and wipe and it's like wiping a marker or the fuking frosting off a birthday cake, you should really consider exploring your diet.

Ghost schits are the best schits.
I make a mess when I chit, its like a bomb. Probably because I eat a lot of carbs, fibre etc.
post 1691541673 10-12-2023, 07:33 AM
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Originally Posted By RayvenJustice⏩
I aint buying this. Why is it that the first wipe is brown and then the next wipe(s) are completely clean? pls go

Guarantee if I applied a baby wipe to a bitches ass after she used a bidet I'd still find chit on it
It literally washes the chit away
post 1691542683 10-12-2023, 07:58 AM
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Originally Posted By RayvenJustice⏩
Yeah i do that too, I dont get on no freaky chit but I put my finger in my ass a little bit

help my fuk I think I just got dumber listening to that. Who the hell is that nasty ratchet sloot supposed to be lmao

pure class.
*Look at reflection in car window and flex every time crew*
*Use half the roll to wipe after a poo crew*
*Fart in the gym and blame rotten smell on faulty ventilation crew*
*Fart at home and blame it on the dog crew*
*Watch neutron-star density poop mock me as water flushes around it and it stays put crew*
*Drive 2 minutes in the summer and back of shirt gets completely wet crew*
*Coffee black as midnight on a moonless night crew*
*Fat shame my cat on a daily basis crew*
post 1691543013 10-12-2023, 08:03 AM
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Originally Posted By Vhagar⏩
It won’t clog up your plumbing
the flushable wipes are marketed to break down in water. i guess you could always leave one in a bucket of water to see if they are lying or not.
post 1691543193 10-12-2023, 08:07 AM
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My GF has one in her Bathroom. The seat automatically warms up and the water starts running in the bowl, so no chit stains. The Stream is warm and feels interesting. Just wipe dry and everything is cleaner than usual. I don't think I will buy one, but it's nice using hers.
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post 1691543753 10-12-2023, 08:19 AM
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https://health.clevelandclinic.org/i...bidet-healthy/
post 1691543913 10-12-2023, 08:21 AM
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Ok let's say you're in a restaurant and you have the choice of two chefs: one who only cleans his hands with baby wipes after he takes a chit; and the other who uses soap and water.

Which do you choose?
SUPERHOT SUPERHOT SUPERHOT SUPERHOT

If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, go home from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains set lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that ye were our countrymen.

SUPERHOT SUPERHOT SUPERHOT SUPERHOT
post 1691544013 10-12-2023, 08:23 AM
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Originally Posted By FoulSmell⏩
https://health.clevelandclinic.org/i...bidet-healthy/
absolutely sickening username to thread content correlation
*Look at reflection in car window and flex every time crew*
*Use half the roll to wipe after a poo crew*
*Fart in the gym and blame rotten smell on faulty ventilation crew*
*Fart at home and blame it on the dog crew*
*Watch neutron-star density poop mock me as water flushes around it and it stays put crew*
*Drive 2 minutes in the summer and back of shirt gets completely wet crew*
*Coffee black as midnight on a moonless night crew*
*Fat shame my cat on a daily basis crew*
post 1691544023 10-12-2023, 08:23 AM
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Thunderpants GTFIH
post 1691544343 10-12-2023, 08:28 AM
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Originally Posted By RayvenJustice⏩
I aint buying this. Why is it that the first wipe is brown and then the next wipe(s) are completely clean? pls go

Guarantee if I applied a baby wipe to a bitches ass after she used a bidet I'd still find chit on it
Lmao imagine being this unaware on bidet superiority. You are literally smearing chit around on your ass until you don't see any visible traces of chit while superior bidet crew simply presses a button and 20 sec later our anguses are SQUEAKY CLEAN because all chit has been pressure washed off.
HTC
Proud Dad crew
6'4" height of the gods
post 1691544443 10-12-2023, 08:31 AM
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Originally Posted By Peacening⏩
Lmao imagine being this unaware on bidet superiority. You are literally smearing chit around on your ass until you don't see any visible traces of chit while superior bidet crew simply presses a button and 20 sec later our anguses are SQUEAKY CLEAN because all chit has been pressure washed off.
I imagine your boyfriend must be happy as a clam being able to eat your squeaky clean angus at all hours of the day.
*Look at reflection in car window and flex every time crew*
*Use half the roll to wipe after a poo crew*
*Fart in the gym and blame rotten smell on faulty ventilation crew*
*Fart at home and blame it on the dog crew*
*Watch neutron-star density poop mock me as water flushes around it and it stays put crew*
*Drive 2 minutes in the summer and back of shirt gets completely wet crew*
*Coffee black as midnight on a moonless night crew*
*Fat shame my cat on a daily basis crew*
post 1691545263 10-12-2023, 08:46 AM
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Originally Posted By RayvenJustice⏩
Yeah i do that too, I dont get on no freaky chit butI put my finger in my ass a little bit

You have to.


(No prostate massage)
I loe e.
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