She's going to the country of romance without her bf ? Lmaoooooo papa john and Luigi are gonna go smack down

Real sorry about your loss, my coworkers wife went to Italy and ended up taking some Giovanni and filipoo cock

Vinicio Meazza and Florencio Costacurta are already waiting for your GF, wich a box of Viagra each. You know that Italian Gaze? Girls cant resist that srs.


But Jamal and Reshardawnson will get at her at the airport before she even leaves brah. The on the way home, Jose and Panchito the plane cleaners will clean that pussy up with their special soap namsayin?

srs?

Completely serious, lied about it when she got back! And later told him

Said and I quote "babe it was just the penis I didn't get off, he wore a condom"

Ci divertiremo tantissimo, op

So im assuming you meant "ex-wife", right?

Pasquale will be going balls deep

Dun goofed OP. Italian men are the GOAT Chads srs, even the loser FA *******s in Italy have a 20+ lay count.


http://www.theonion.com/multiblogpos...n-americ-11552


European Men Are So Much More Romantic Than American Men



Alyssa Lerner, Boston University

I just got back from a semester abroad in Europe, and let me tell you, it truly was the most magical, amazing experience of my entire life. The French countryside was like something out of a storybook, the Roman ruins were magnificent, and the men, well, European men are by far the most romantic in the world.

You American men all think you're so suave and sophisticated. Well, think again! European men make you look like the immature, inexperienced little children you are. They really know how to make a woman feel special over there. Unlike the so-called men here in the States, European men know how to treat a woman right.

For one thing, European men aren't afraid to come up and talk to you. And they know how to start slow, with a nice cup of Italian espresso or a long walk on some historic street. They know the places you can't find in any tourist guide. They know the whole history of the cities in which they live—who the fountains are named after, who the statues are.

I remember one unforgettable night in Athens, I sat and listened to a Greek sailor for hours as he told me about the countless men who fought over Helen back in ancient times. Afterward, he told me he loved his homeland even more now that he'd seen it through my eyes. I ask you, would an American man ever say something as deep and beautiful as that?

European men know the most romantic little cafs and bistros and trattorias, candlelit places where you can be alone and drink the most fantastic wine. They tell you what's on the menu and what you should try. (If it wasn't for a certain young man in Milan, I never would have discovered fusilli a spinaci et scampi.) And the whole time, they're looking deep into your eyes, like you're the only woman on the entire planet. What woman could resist a man like that? Then, after a moonlit stroll along the waterfront and a kiss in the doorway of their artist's loft, you find yourself unable to—well, I'll leave the rest to your imagination.

I'll never forget my magical semester abroad. One thing's for sure—I'm ruined for American men forever!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

American Women Studying In Europe Are Unbelievably Easy



I'm a 25-year-old carpenter living in Rome, and I don't mind telling you that I get all the action I can handle. I'm not all that handsome or well-dressed, and I'm certainly not rich. In fact, my Italian countrywomen could take me or leave me. But that's just fine, because Rome gets loads of tourist traffic, and American co-eds traveling through Europe are without a doubt the easiest lays in the world.

Being European gives me a hell of an advantage. I'm not sure why, but there's something about the accent that opens a lot of doors. All you have to do is go up to them, act a little shy and say, "Whould hyou like to go with me, Signorina, for a caf?" I actually have to thicken up my accent a little, but they never, ever catch on.

After a cheap coffee, which to them always tastes better than anything they've ever had, because they're in Europe, it's time to walk them. Now, all they know about Rome is what they've read in Let's Go, so you can pretty much just make up a whole bunch of ****. It's fun to see how much they'll swallow: As long as I refer to Italy as "my homeland" and other Italians as "my people," they'll believe pretty much anything. I don't know who most of the local statues are, so I tell the muffins they're all great artists and poets and lovers. Once, just for the hell of it, I told a psychology major from the University of Maryland that a public staircase was part of the Spanish Steps, which she'd never even heard of. Another time, I told this blonde from Michigan State that the public library was the Parthenon, and she cooed like I'd just given her a diamond.

For dinner, I usually take them to some cheap little hole in the wall, someplace deserted where not even the cops eat. American girls think candlelight means "romance," not "deteriorating public utilities," so they just poke their nipples through their J. Crew sweaters and never notice that there's no electricity. Just as well, because Roman restaurants aren't exactly the cleanest. After a bunch of fast-talk about the menu, I get them the special, which is usually some anonymous pasta with spinach and day-old shrimp, and whatever cheap, generic, Pope's-blood chianti's at the bottom of the list.

By this time, they're usually standing in a slippery little puddle. Going in for the kill, I walk them past one of Rome's famous 2,000-year-old open cesspools. Then, as we open the door to my ****ty efficiency, I kiss them on the eyelids so they don't see the roaches, making sure the first thing they see is the strategically positioned artist's easel I bought at some church sale. That's usually all they need to see and, like clockwork, they fall backwards on my bed with their Birkenstocks in the air.

I mean, they're hardly Italian women, but we have a saying here in Europe: Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?

she will get so much spaghetti meat balls up her pu**yyyy

Donatello going balls deep!

lmao!!

pray that pussy has 9 lives, because mario and luigi are gonna murder it repeatedly

Chaddius Caesar and Tyroneangelo already balls deep brah, time to move on.

Matteo checking in. Take it from an Italian, who runs with mostly Italians - you are under serious threat because few girls can resist good looking Italians. Just about every girl has 'Italian/Mediterranean' on the list of men they're attracted to.

Combine that with the magic of being in gorgeous Italia, with the accent they'll have, it's seriously game over for you. Over there the young men take particular interest in tourist girls for obvious reasons. Quick and easy kills where they have a huge advantage for the above reasons.

I've spoken to DeAngelo and he will be waiting for your girl at the pizza parlor to give her a nice piece.

Not gonna lie, American girls visiting Italy are considered the easiest girls on the planet and every Italian guy on the prowl knows it. You have to hope your girl is as loyal and dedicated as you're making her out to be, because I sure as hell wouldn't trust Italian guys not to give it a shot.

Look at it this way - it's the ultimate test of how faithful she is. If she doesn't cheat on you in Italy, she's potentially wife material.

Story checks out. Mamma mia, no homo.

Mohammad is gonna be all up in those guts

tour finito , boyo

sdrai e marciume

Oh boy, Italy is probably the worst place on this planet to let your young gf go alone to....RIP, save yourself time and stress and break up with her, she will be riding Giovanni's and Luigi's dink all day long. Not even Tyrone and Jamal let their women go to Italy alone....

i know a chick that went to italy and to the beach to sunbathe. she was topless but some italian chad (showed me photos he was like a 9/10 (no homo)) came out to her and said she had some aura (italian for glow) and sat with her... she told me then they fked later that night. he was aggressive and choked her when fkinng. pulled her hair, wanted to piitb but she didnt let him.

moral or story.

she said he was too hot to pass up and just had to fk him.

strong fukin cuck you are listening to details of girl friends being banged

10/10 cuck tale, would read to my wife's children.

bish's poozy gonna come back speakin italia

lol. hardly. i know the girl is half a sloot. she was also a fk buddy in the past. i wouldnt date her if you paid me fgt.

now go make me some ruski pierogi with some kotlety mielone on the side

oh no op what did you do? oh no... op you shouldnt have done this!

Don't worry brah, she'll bring you a souvenir......in 9 months

On the plus side, at least he'll have the benefit of raising a son with Chadnifico genetics.