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Forum » Still struggling after a break up
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Thread: Still struggling after a break up

post 1662804643 06-13-2022, 02:16 PM
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#31
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Bruh it’s summer - just go meet a new one
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post 1662805703 06-13-2022, 02:34 PM
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fuk that chit, we're all gonna make it!!
post 1662805813 06-13-2022, 02:35 PM
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#33
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Originally Posted By BuildKing⏩
1 month after and its still tough... I got very attached to her, beautiful, smart... we were planning our life together, kids etc.. we were together 3 years, she adored me, worshiped me, told me she loved me and wants to spend her whole life with me and never lose me so many times, up until the end.

Then suddenly she just said she wants to breakup and doesn't want to keep going anymore, just like that, all of a sudden, no warning signs nothing...

Im sure it happened to many of you guys too, and im pretty sure even tho its "sudden" that she has been planning it for weeks probably, because she all of a sudden was cold, like I mean nothing to her anymore lmao, literally a day after she was telling me that I mean everything.

Im seriously starting to think almost every single woman is like this, manipulative and deceiving, pretending something but in reality up to something else, you just can't trust them, at all.. even if you are together for 10 or 15 years, she can just leave you in an instant, suddenly, with no remorse or feelings.

They are so manipulative, they keep all of this inside and detach completely from you, instead of communicating it and working on it, like any healthy relationship should.
She likely was a narcissist and you didn't realize it. It's so common in society now for women to act like this. We created a nation of narcissistic women through social media. This has happened to me a few times too. Women can turn off their emotions at will like sociopaths. It creeps me out honestly.


Also, don't assume it was something wrong with you that caused it like other people are saying. I've seen plenty of amazing guys get completely used and dumped like it was nothing and these men were top tier in almost every regard. Women have no idea what they actually want. Best way to deal with women is to be dating a few at the same time always. Trust no woman. They're human and flawed and basically children in adult bodies. Would you trust a child to not fuk you over? Then why trust any woman?

Just try to think about all of her flaws. If you were in love with her you ignored major flaws that she has and thought she was perfect etc but she def wasn't if she can pull that kind of **** and just dump you like you meant nothing to her.
post 1662805883 06-13-2022, 02:36 PM
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Originally Posted By truesteez⏩
lol at caring about a chick in 2022. Don't let that chit impact your life even in the slightest.

They're all the same. Every single one has a smartphone/social media addiction, obsessed with their 'fur baby', sloots and has taken narcissism to a whole new level. Victim mentality of piss.
straight facts right here ^^

aka

sloots gonna sloot
post 1662805913 06-13-2022, 02:37 PM
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Originally Posted By Azrairc⏩
Damn tough break. Need more details to clue in on something. 3 years without an engagement? How was dating her recently did you do anything new and exciting?
I'm curious about this as well. In any case, I'm really sorry to hear that. Some good advice posted here, hope you listen to them.
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post 1662806423 06-13-2022, 02:44 PM
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Obviously a new dude.
Women who break up a long term relationship always wait until they have a back up.

Next time you get a gf you have to keep her in check. Dont let her go out drinking without you, have guy friends or even let random guys follow on social media. Tell her to give you all her passwords on social media also.
If she isnt willing to do all of those you got a whore, not a wife. Ditch her & move on.

Anyone that gets dumped & doesnt see it coming is not paying attention at all.
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post 1662806563 06-13-2022, 02:47 PM
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Keep your head up king.

I got dumped 6 days ago : It hurts like hell but I'm starting to get to terms with this new reality of her not being a part of my life anymore. She's not in love an do not intend to fall in love with me.

I'll stay the same and propose my services to someone else.

If they don't value then you don't need them in your life brah, she chose a life without you in it.
post 1662826383 06-13-2022, 09:54 PM
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Originally Posted By Blond_airforcedude⏩
My girl was active all the damn time on FB messenger and snapchat. I told her it bothered me and she deflected and started to gaslight. I told her I just can't deal with it anymore and to have her social media if it means so much to her but i was done. Feels pretty good honestly.. Now i don't have to worry anymore!
"Omg, you are so insecure!!!!! You're supposed to just TRUST me!!!!!!!!
post 1662827173 06-13-2022, 10:18 PM
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Sorry man sounds like she's been throating someone on the sidelines, we're all gonna make it.
post 1662827243 06-13-2022, 10:23 PM
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women realize the internet/instagram affords them unlimited options

this ruined relationships/dating
post 1662827393 06-13-2022, 10:28 PM
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Start dating Asian women. It'll change your life.
Survival. When the jungle tears itself down and builds itself into something new. Guys like you and me, we end up dead. Doesn’t really mean anything. Or, if we happen to live through it, well that doesn’t mean anything either.
post 1662827533 06-13-2022, 10:32 PM
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The hardest part is not picturing her down on her knees throat goating another man. Once you pass that you're good
Survival. When the jungle tears itself down and builds itself into something new. Guys like you and me, we end up dead. Doesn’t really mean anything. Or, if we happen to live through it, well that doesn’t mean anything either.
post 1662827543 06-13-2022, 10:32 PM
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#43
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Similar story for me. I wasn’t prepared in the slightest for it but I came back stronger. It’ll be fine just avoid dwelling over it because obsessing over the past robs you of the present.
See you tomorrow
post 1662828223 06-13-2022, 10:55 PM
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#44
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Originally Posted By Gurgy⏩
Go and stay on No Contact fly to north carolina (NC)

2 things will happen she will reach out to you or you'll never hear from her again.

we are all gonna make it.
This, But do not hope she reaches out to you. Exes ALWAYS come back. But you should hope she doesn't contact you. In the day and age of social media it is really over. I know it's hard to hear. But it is done.

Do not respond, To any out reaching it will never work. Someone that can walk out on you on a blink, Is not someone you should have in your 100 mile radius.
post 1662828433 06-13-2022, 11:02 PM
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Time heals Op..but if you really want her back, there's lots of ways to do it, without being super creepy.
post 1662828983 06-13-2022, 11:31 PM
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Thats pretty scarcity mindset of you, move on and enjoy the dope chit in life
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post 1662829233 06-13-2022, 11:45 PM
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That sucks, brah. I've never been dumped but a breakup sucks regardless. Especially when you're blindsided like that.
The closer we approach the uncertainty of life's ending the more we wish to trade all of the things we have acquired in exchange for all of the things we have lost: wealth for youth, knowledge for fresh curiosity, resignation for hope. We'd trade our wisdom for new experiences, but it is wisdom that will teach us that at the end of the road the only new experience is death.
post 1662829883 06-14-2022, 12:31 AM
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#48
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Originally Posted By BuildKing⏩
They are so manipulative, they keep all of this inside and detach completely from you, instead of communicating it and working on it, like any healthy relationship should.
I have heard both explanations. One is what you are saying and other is they couldn't communicate with you or hold a conversation with you because of the way you reacted to their thoughts and because they knew what you would say to every argument and ultimately you wouldn't make any sacrifices or change in any way. That's why they kept it all pent up and fell out off love with each passing day.
post 1662829903 06-14-2022, 12:33 AM
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#49
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Originally Posted By 4everalone⏩
Obviously a new dude.
Women who break up a long term relationship always wait until they have a back up.

Next time you get a gf you have to keep her in check. Dont let her go out drinking without you, have guy friends or even let random guys follow on social media. Tell her to give you all her passwords on social media also.
If she isnt willing to do all of those you got a whore, not a wife. Ditch her & move on.

Anyone that gets dumped & doesnt see it coming is not paying attention at all.
If she must leave the house for some reason then it should be looking like this too?

post 1662832343 06-14-2022, 04:08 AM
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Sorry bruh, I broke up a month ago too and I am still struggling.

Can't try rationalize their decisions because you cannot mind read. If you could you'd get whatever you wanted.

All you can do is focus on yourself, improve yourself whether its travel,sport or a new hobby.

Her loss, Its always hard at first and that's normal....just give it time and grow yourself.
Dont feel bad for feeling upset.
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post 1662832753 06-14-2022, 04:31 AM
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#51
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On the other side of this, ive had so many girls hit on my that I knew were in relationships. Youd think that behavior would end in high school but no.

I rejected every single one of them.

United states need tougher punishment for adultery. Bring back prison time for it srs.
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post 1662832993 06-14-2022, 04:51 AM
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#52
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Give it time

The older you get ,the less you'll give a f

I feel for you young guys tho

Women in the 80s were more real

Then again

Everyone was
post 1662836003 06-14-2022, 07:04 AM
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#53
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Originally Posted By northernlights7⏩
"Omg, you are so insecure!!!!! You're supposed to just TRUST me!!!!!!!!
Its like the closer you get to uncovering something the angrier they become. You've never seen someone (narcissist) more angry then when you out them on cheating or any other **** behavior.
post 1662836313 06-14-2022, 07:15 AM
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#54
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I'm a bad guy for saying it, but you gotta make sure she loves you more than you love her srs
post 1662836353 06-14-2022, 07:16 AM
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#55
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Originally Posted By Ratfish⏩
there was another dude, dude

the only way to date a gal in 2022 is to date several simultaneously

srs
This.

One foot in and one foot out, if you keep both feet in you get knocked off your ass like you did now.

Best way to get over old pussy is to get into new pussy
post 1662842783 06-14-2022, 09:41 AM
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Originally Posted By RogerDuck⏩
I have heard both explanations. One is what you are saying and other is they couldn't communicate with you or hold a conversation with you because of the way you reacted to their thoughts and because they knew what you would say to every argument and ultimately you wouldn't make any sacrifices or change in any way. That's why they kept it all pent up and fell out off love with each passing day.
She told me from the start that she is an introvert and keeps things inside and doesn't talk about things, told her from the start that it wont work, if you want a strong relationship you need to communicate...and that I realize she is like this but that its something we need to work on, to have a clear open communication..she said its the way she is but she will work on it.. after that it happened a few times at various times, she told me something that was important to communicate or talk about but only 2-3 weeks after the thing actually happened, when she was already frustrated with it completely.
post 1662842943 06-14-2022, 09:43 AM
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Originally Posted By ralphlaurenbrah⏩
She likely was a narcissist and you didn't realize it. It's so common in society now for women to act like this. We created a nation of narcissistic women through social media. This has happened to me a few times too. Women can turn off their emotions at will like sociopaths. It creeps me out honestly.


Also, don't assume it was something wrong with you that caused it like other people are saying. I've seen plenty of amazing guys get completely used and dumped like it was nothing and these men were top tier in almost every regard. Women have no idea what they actually want. Best way to deal with women is to be dating a few at the same time always. Trust no woman. They're human and flawed and basically children in adult bodies. Would you trust a child to not fuk you over? Then why trust any woman?

Just try to think about all of her flaws. If you were in love with her you ignored major flaws that she has and thought she was perfect etc but she def wasn't if she can pull that kind of **** and just dump you like you meant nothing to her.
I did notice some slight narcissistic traits or at least sometimes I noticed that she seems to be very self centered and like the world revolves around her and everyone needs to cater to her, most of all from outside people, her close people, family... sometimes happened with me too, situations like this..
Care to explain a bit more about this?
post 1662843383 06-14-2022, 09:52 AM
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Originally Posted By Azrairc⏩
Damn tough break. Need more details to clue in on something. 3 years without an engagement? How was dating her recently did you do anything new and exciting?
Ok I will try to give more info but in short so its not too long

Pros:

-She is hot 8.5/10
-Sex was amazing
-We got along great, similar sense of humor, she is super funny etc.. personality wise great
-Similar goals, vision etc...
-Our family got along great, and their family loved me, my family loved her

Cons:

-Has some past childhood trauma, jealousy and trust issues, few times she got into some jealous rage about some things she made in her head
-Changes opinion and mood at times very fast and extreme, for example one week we might talk about getting married the other week she is talking about wanting to finish her career first and not get married... one week she wants kids this year, the next week she doesn't want kids for a few years etc and constantly changing


Relationship was good and we were planning some stuff for the future, in the past 6 months I had to go on some work related business so we were at times long distance for a couple of weeks, so I guess that was a bit of a factor but still you don't ruin a good relationship just because of that, because things are not ideal at the moment, and this was just about to last for a few more months, and also was good for us in a financial sense.
post 1662844493 06-14-2022, 10:16 AM
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#59
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Originally Posted By BuildKing⏩
Ok I will try to give more info but in short so its not too long

Pros:

-She is hot 8.5/10
-Sex was amazing
-We got along great, similar sense of humor, she is super funny etc.. personality wise great
-Similar goals, vision etc...
-Our family got along great, and their family loved me, my family loved her

Cons:

-Has some past childhood trauma, jealousy and trust issues, few times she got into some jealous rage about some things she made in her head
-Changes opinion and mood at times very fast and extreme, for example one week we might talk about getting married the other week she is talking about wanting to finish her career first and not get married... one week she wants kids this year, the next week she doesn't want kids for a few years etc and constantly changing


Relationship was good and we were planning some stuff for the future, in the past 6 months I had to go on some work related business so we were at times long distance for a couple of weeks, so I guess that was a bit of a factor but still you don't ruin a good relationship just because of that, because things are not ideal at the moment, and this was just about to last for a few more months, and also was good for us in a financial sense.
She sounds similar to mine, although mine was less extreme with mood swings but definitely a quiet introvert type who seemed like the black sheep of the family. Don't discount the long distance for a couple of weeks with her insecurities as the deciding factor, something was building up in her and you'd likely have to figure that out

In my case I was focused on other areas in my life and doing less of the little things, it makes a huge difference. At the end of the day I knew I was guilty lol and I'm not sure why I seemed to be holding back some effort knowing it would get me in trouble because I had some doubts, but really little things like telling her you miss her and can't wait to see her on a trip a way.. literally treating her like when you first started dating to keep her insecurities at bay. All that type of chit, you have to regularly grit your teeth and tell them what they want to hear.

Also have you communicated with her since the breakup? give it another month of silence and she'll probably reach out to you
post 1662845173 06-14-2022, 10:33 AM
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#60
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Originally Posted By Azrairc⏩
She sounds similar to mine, although mine was less extreme with mood swings but definitely a quiet introvert type who seemed like the black sheep of the family. Don't discount the long distance for a couple of weeks with her insecurities as the deciding factor, something was building up in her and you'd likely have to figure that out

In my case I was focused on other areas in my life and doing less of the little things, it makes a huge difference. At the end of the day I knew I was guilty lol and I'm not sure why I seemed to be holding back some effort knowing it would get me in trouble because I had some doubts, but really little things like telling her you miss her and can't wait to see her on a trip a way.. literally treating her like when you first started dating to keep her insecurities at bay. All that type of chit, you have to regularly grit your teeth and tell them what they want to hear.

Also have you communicated with her since the breakup? give it another month of silence and she'll probably reach out to you
Yeah the thing is she is inescure and jealous so the distance made it worse, and if you always think about this obviously ur going to drift away a bit, you can't feel close and connected to someone if you constantly think about this sh*t...

Since the breakup I went no contact, she then contacted me late at night at around 9-10pm, I didnt reply, replied the other day, and she said she wanted to talk but forget it... acted defensive and cold and weird and said how easy I replace her and my feelings and lots of crap like that... so didnt talk again for 2 weeks, then she wrote to me with something similar again how its so easy for me to replace her... hello YOU BROKE UP lol... and unfollowed me from instagram, and said that apparently she doesn't even know me that im a stranger to her since we didn't even see each other for some weeks and said some other cold and cruel things.
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