Like I mentioned before, I would target Sunday evening, or Monday midday could work. I would err on the side of letting her have uninterrupted family time (unless she reaches out, then respond) and then just tell her you hope it was fun and set a date for during the week.

first one was good, girl is really nice and talkative, easy conversation and an overall fun time. does seem a bit shy about the physical things and only got a goodnight kiss, no escalation.

second one was rough, conversation was very like small talk level, not a great time. probably won't go out again, but no loss to me.

Update:

So we went on a second date at a restaurant.

When I met her I went for a kiss, but she kind of pulled back. Still kissed me, but very quick. Could tell she was nervous, so I calmed her down, lol.

At the restaurant things were good. The conversation was flowing well and I could tell she liked me (playing with her hair, etc.). She tried to chit test me from time to time, but I think I did okay for the most part. When we finished and went outside I grabbed her and we had a long passionate make out session. Then we went to my car and continued.

This is where chit started to get kind of funny and a little disastrous on my end.. I proposed we go back to mine, but she refused. Still continued to make out though and she was moaning and stuff. I got hard, so I put her hand on my dik and she started rubbing it. I unzipped my pants and put her hand on it and she pulled it out - started stroking it. I was fuking horny, so told her to "suck it" and she looked at me and said "..but there's people over there!". LMFAO. Told her they can't see chit, but she refused lol. Calmed down a bit after that, made out a few more times and talked about different stuff. Then I dropped her off.

Spent like 5 hours together again. Overall it was great, except for some fuk ups on my part, but at least it's a funny story to tell lmao.

Any tips/suggestions for the next date?

edit: Just remembered I had this very strange deja vu moment when we were talking. At one point when she said something it hit me with the deja vu like I've heard her say the exact same thing at the same place & moment and I knew what she was going to say next. And she did say exactly that. Never had this happen to me before, where I would know what someone is about to say, lol.

inb4 strong username to post correllation

Sounds like things are moving in the right direction and she just doesn't want to seem like a sloot, which is probably a positive thing. Not sure about your cooking skills, but my next idea would be offering to make her dinner at your place, watch a movie, etc. If you aren't much of a cook, maybe suggest ordering stuff and leave the rest of the plan the same. Seems like escalation is in the cards for you but not likely to happen out in "public."

Women love when you pull you dick out and say “suck it”.

Update 2:

So I proposed to have dinner at my place and that I would cook for us. She agreed.

The morning before we were supposed to meet she texts me that she thinks I'm a wonderful guy, but we're too different and shouldn't meet anymore. **** kind of hurt, since I really liked hanging out with her and I thought it was mutual.

I thanked her for the nice moments and wished her all the best.

Not sure if I did something wrong or it just wasn't meant to be.

Chit sucks and feels like my confidence took a hit. Time to hit the gym again I guess.

It just wasn't meant to be, you likely did nothing wrong, that's just how it is sometimes

welcome to online dating brah.


where sloots are seeing 20+ guys at the same time.

By the 2nd date, I set the exclusivity boundary.

hows that work out for you lol?

im just done w online dating in general tbh. they need to build more streets with all these hos around

Very well, but I think you're asking the wrong question depending on what you mean by "work out".

If the woman did decide to bail, since she wanted to date multiple guys, that would be a good outcome.

girls my age would never accept this in a million years

You might be surprised. More people than you think really do not like the modern dating scene, they just go along with it. I’d say especially women.

if you met this girl irl......maybe

online I highly doubt it

I think it also depends on the man's age

online dating is a chit show, I wish you the best

How would you even know if you want exclusivity on the 2nd date? I can understand setting that boundary when you get physical, but on the second date, you might just decide that it's not a good fit or not enough chemistry, etc.

My point is that if we want tocontinuedating towards a relationship, that should be done exclusively. I'm not saying either party can't end it at any point.

Lol

How do you know whether if it's not a good fit if you've only had two dates?

thx boyo.


its unfortunately filled with a bunch of sloots with either ton of baggage (exes, kids etc) or a sloot talking to 20 dudes at once lmao.


no time for that. time to BUILD.

Brah, you've seriously never gone on just a second date and realized you're not compatible or aren't that attracted to her?

I agree sometimes it takes longer, and I do think a problem with modern dating is that people are too quick to write someone off, but two dates is all it takes sometimes. I went on one date once which seemed to be going very well, and then she got tipsy and started acting belligerent and crazy. Never saw her again.

Absolutely the best route, you aren't really missing anything lol

got a girl now that msgs me what's up every Saturday.

all I need

Sounds like you did well but i do have a few suggestions for the future that might help.

Just to clarify. I'm single and not actively dating at the moment but never had an issue going from dates to a relationship when i was hardcore into gym, im a bit rusty myself now.



1. It seems like you still need to grow when it comes to dating, no offense. I'll give you golden advice that someone gave me when i was younger - when your going on dates with a new girl dont ever ask for sex unless she's a slut.

If you keep asking then she's just going to end it very fast. You asked on the first date, the second date and the third. My brother in Christ, it comes across as very desperate and thats the biggest turn off. sex for the first time needs to come naturally.

2. When you go on a date again with a different girl try this - meet up and build chemistry and rapport. If at the end of the date she seems like she's really into you (maybe staring at your lips as your about to leave) then give go for it and makeout. You don't want to be spending nearly 5 hours together and making out constantly, i know if you do that it feels like she must be really into you but in reality she'll get bored really fast and move on.

Same for the second date, meet up, build even more chemistry + rapport and at the end of the date go in for the kiss then leave. Dinner/bar should only last 2-3 hrs really before you should go home. doing it like this is more likely to get her way more interested in you rather than you more interested in her.


3. Its great you got a hand job but not a good idea to tell her to suck your dick on the second date and if she really wanted to she would've just done it without you asking.


4. Mainly just don't show too much sexual interest and avoid spending too much time together, get her wanting you more than you want her.

5. By the 3rd date is when you want to start thinking about ****ing, if she seems a bit shy still at this point you could go on another normal date but when it comes to the 4th date try giving her options for example, ask if she wants to go for food, bar or back to yours to try your cooking. that way your not being forward at all and giving her choices.

i've had a girl come back to mine, we started making out and at the same time naturally made our way up to the bedroom. then whilst im undressing her, she said she doesn't **** the first time she comes over but after a bit of foreplay i was blowing her back out.

Girls with not much self respect will usually come over by the third date and fuq, girls with more self respect might take 4 dates. Anymore than 4/5 dates then shes taking the piss.

You need to switch mindset to a guy that has no issues getting girls (fake it till you make it). women are hardwired to want a guy that other women want so if you can display this properly then you'll get way more attraction from her. so yeah dont spend 5hrs together and come across as too forward otherwise it seems like you don't have a lot of options.

women with self respect are like a raw piece of meat. you have to season her on the first few dates and give it time to marinate, if you do it properly and take your time you'll be eating good.


Having a nice body, going to the gym and looking after yourself is pretty much 80% of the way there the other 20% is being a decent normal guy since there's a lot of weirdos that put females off. Good luck Bromo!

lol wut. i think your confused mate.

your just showing that your insecure and controlling if your demanding exclusivity by the second date. good luck with that.

I want a slooot
"sloot"
will be locked up in my apt for another week until my hair grows back
2 hairdressers ****ed me up

Your confidence shouldn't take a hit. You had her all over you both dates so you clearly did enough in the attraction department.

IMO your actions showed your primary focus was escalating towards sex. Did she (or either of you) say if you were looking for just casual or something more?

While she was clearly into you, she probably also felt like this was leading to something physical and nothing more, and even if she wasn't looking for something serious she might've been put off by how aggressive you were. IMO it's best to be assertive with the escalating up to making out (& touching/grabbing their legs/hips/butt/back etc but nothing more). Usually to go past that point I either let them take it to the next level or just ask if they want to move it to the bedroom.

If by any chance you are looking to legitimately date then probably slow it down quite a bit. If you're just looking for primarily casual/fwb/etc, keep escalating quick but just pause at that last point and use a bit more words and less actions.

^Good advice above.

Thanks to all you brahs for the advice (ran out of reps, but will get you on recharge).

I was looking to date her, not just a FWB type of thing and I do remember her asking me what I'm looking for on our first date. I told her that I'm just looking for the right company (someone to have a good time with) and if we click - progress into something more serious/relationship. She looked pleased with my answer from what I could tell. And if that answer was the problem we wouldn't have met a second time. I didn't ask her what she was looking for though.

Yes, it was clear I wanted to have sex with her, but she wanted it too (was pretty obvious). First date she was moaning, talking about not minding being choked and saying I'm such a gentleman for not grabbing her ass (which I slapped right after she said that, and yes she liked it). On our second date I clearly remember her saying stuff like "I've heard our zodiacs make a great sex combo" and "wow you have large hands - I heard that means you have something else that's large" (inb4 proudmanlet). Not to mention I just put her hand in my pants but she was the one that whipped my entire cawk out, lol. Yeah I probably shouldn't have asked her to suck it, but hey - she didn't mention anything about this later on or the next day. On the contrary - the next day we even joked about how we could've spent the entire night "talking" and she said it's great that I would like to do that.

And then in the last text she sent me she said "I think we are too different" not "we are looking for different things". If I was too aggressive she could've just slowed down a bit or confronted me and ask me if all I'm after is just sex. That's just what I think, I could be wrong of course.

Anyways I will take notes of this and hopefully improve myself. I feel a bit chitty, because she looked like a decent girl and I actually felt something for her (which happens rarely), so it would be a shame if I pushed her away with unclear intentions. I was never after just sex.

To be honest I think probably some guy (ex) showed up the days after our second date and that's what caused the sudden 180 degree change from wanting to come over and have dinner together to directly rejecting me.

She hasn't removed me from social media, but I guess it's out of the question to contact her and ask her why she thinks we're so different, because I honestly don't know?

Would not surprise me at all based on what you have said. Very common with girls who just got out of relationships or got mad at an existing FWB sort of guy for whatever reason and decided to look around at possible replacements. One girl I was hanging out with the other day (just hanging out as part of a group, not on a date) was telling me how she is currently hooking up with a few guys and talking to several more but would likely go straight over and bang her ex (whom she dumped) if he called her and suggested she come over. In a lot of cases that will result in talking about "working things out," and so the prospects she had end up getting ghosted for at least some period of time and maybe permanently.

Probably. My advice is to stop overthinking this. We're all slightly autistic on this forum, and will conjure reasons and scenarios for every outcome.

If you didn't obviously do anything wrong, there's nothing to change.