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Forum » Matches have pretty much died ³
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Thread: Matches have pretty much died ³

post 1681860923 05-01-2023, 05:49 PM
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I get a lot of matches but the conversations die out either in the app (hinge) or by text.

Any advice on converting a convo into a date for an oldcell?
post 1681862113 05-01-2023, 06:14 PM
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Originally Posted By Alphametric⏩
I get a lot of matches but the conversations die out either in the app (hinge) or by text.

Any advice on converting a convo into a date for an oldcell?
there is nothing you can really do

keep a good conversation going and after y'all are chit chatting for a bit move it off the app

all that matters is online dating is how you look in your pictures

the only difference in a girl being as dry as a board or head over heels for you is your looks
Balanced Test Crew
post 1681863773 05-01-2023, 06:44 PM
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Originally Posted By xbluexhawkx⏩
there is nothing you can really do

keep a good conversation going and after y'all are chit chatting for a bit move it off the app

all that matters is online dating is how you look in your pictures

the only difference in a girl being as dry as a board or head over heels for you is your looks
That's true. They will make it easy if they really want. Guess it's just a numbers game. Racking up matches (+200 I just counted lol) just waiting for the one who has me in her sights to pounce
post 1681872163 05-01-2023, 09:31 PM
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Originally Posted By Alphametric⏩
I get a lot of matches but the conversations die out either in the app (hinge) or by text.

Any advice on converting a convo into a date for an oldcell?
Think about what YOU want in a partner and maybe construct your profile that way. Do you want to be more mass appealing? Lot of matches? Or a certain type of woman. I ask this because people get burned out on optionality and some of the people I've seen on online dating I sometimes have seen them on there for years so maybe dialing down on what you want will help.
A hit was sent, from the President, to raid your residence /
Because you had secret evidence, and documents /
On how they raped the continents, and it's the prominent /
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post 1681873703 05-01-2023, 10:19 PM
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Originally Posted By Alphametric⏩
That's true. They will make it easy if they really want. Guess it's just a numbers game. Racking up matches (+200 I just counted lol) just waiting for the one who has me in her sights to pounce
all I can is for sure don't move them too quickly off the app, if the convo is going good just keep it going until it feels right

biggest mistake people make is asking for their number too quickly, you'll scare them off
Balanced Test Crew
post 1681894193 05-02-2023, 09:31 AM
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Originally Posted By Alphametric⏩
I get a lot of matches but the conversations die out either in the app (hinge) or by text.

Any advice on converting a convo into a date for an oldcell?
Link your IG to your dating profile. Have lots of travel, food, and pics of you enjoying life. Be shredded.

I construct my profiles in a humorous way so women know they are going to have a fun time with me.
post 1681900353 05-02-2023, 11:23 AM
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Originally Posted By sword_⏩
Think about what YOU want in a partner and maybe construct your profile that way. Do you want to be more mass appealing? Lot of matches? Or a certain type of woman. I ask this because people get burned out on optionality and some of the people I've seen on online dating I sometimes have seen them on there for years so maybe dialing down on what you want will help.
I think I'm getting enough matches with the types of women I would date.

I'm just not getting any dates 😁.

And yeah I've been on these apps in the past, I wasn't as focused on a serious relationship like I am now. I was more looking for something short term/casual and I had success.

Maybe broaden my horizons by downloading bumble? Or tinder? Or both? But I don't want this dating app thing to consume me and I really prefer hinges features to all of the rest.
Originally Posted By 4North1Side2⏩
Link your IG to your dating profile. Have lots of travel, food, and pics of you enjoying life. Be shredded.

I construct my profiles in a humorous way so women know they are going to have a fun time with me.
I check all these boxes. I have plenty of interest in my profile, but very little interest in actually meeting up.

Maybe I'm too picky? I like 1/20 profiles (+/-). And will match with 1/5 likes (+/-).

The pattern is almost predictable at this point. Hinge will show me 20ish profiles I don't like in a row, then 5ish profiles I like. I'll match with 1 of them. Message back and forth and either I will loose interest or they will at some point in the convo, and it mostly dies out before getting their number.

But you are right, maybe even though I want a "serious" relationship I should be more about "fun" to spark interest and curiosity at first.
post 1681902483 05-02-2023, 11:52 AM
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Originally Posted By Alphametric⏩
I think I'm getting enough matches with the types of women I would date.

I'm just not getting any dates .

And yeah I've been on these apps in the past, I wasn't as focused on a serious relationship like I am now. I was more looking for something short term/casual and I had success.

I check all these boxes. I have plenty of interest in my profile, but very little interest in actually meeting up.

Maybe I'm too picky? I like 1/20 profiles (+/-). And will match with 1/5 likes (+/-).

The pattern is almost predictable at this point. Hinge will show me 20ish profiles I don't like in a row, then 5ish profiles I like. I'll match with 1 of them. Message back and forth and either I will loose interest or they will at some point in the convo, and it mostly dies out before getting their number.

But you are right, maybe even though I want a "serious" relationship I should be more about "fun" to spark interest and curiosity at first.
Very similar experience with Hinge the last few months.
30+ date-quality matches in 3 months or so. ~5 times I was a message or two away from asking them out/for number and that's when I got no reply back.
One date I got had gained weight since pics. The other I was kind of into but wasn't sure if she was my type physically and that was confirmed once we went out a few times.

Some friends say I message too much before asking them out but I found in the past it also helps to filter out the ones dating too many ppl at once and also just to ensure you have some common interests/things to talk about.

I'm more upfront now about the fact I have a kid (in profile vs letting them know a few messages in), as well as not matching with girls who have cats and dogs I'd be allergic to. In theory this helps find a better potential longterm match but on the other hand it sucks for the ego and missing out on a potentially fun fling.

I feel like I'm in that middle-zone of open to both short and longterm opportunities and I'd prob have a bit better luck gearing my profile one way or the other.

Bumble was awesome for me ~5 years ago. Taking a break from the apps for the time being but all-in-all, it was a disappointing few months on Hinge.
post 1681905223 05-02-2023, 12:32 PM
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Some of you seem to be very frustrated with the whole dating process

Having to swipe on a million chicks, jestermaxx, take them out on dates etc. is incredibly draining

Most of these chicks too you wouldn't even look at twice irl, they're really nothing special at all

And once you learn just how dating apps work is when you get really turned off by them

Get off the apps and go live your lives to the fullest, hit the gym everyday, progress your careers, become mentally unbreakable etc.

Most girls are not even on dating apps and really don't want to meet their future husband off an app, they're out there and you'll meet yours eventually

Let life flow, don't force anything

as long as you don't ldar yall will be ok
Balanced Test Crew
post 1681907833 05-02-2023, 01:10 PM
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Originally Posted By xbluexhawkx⏩
Some of you seem to be very frustrated with the whole dating process

Having to swipe on a million chicks, jestermaxx, take them out on dates etc. is incredibly draining

Most of these chicks too you wouldn't even look at twice irl, they're really nothing special at all

And once you learn just how dating apps work is when you get really turned off by them

Get off the apps and go live your lives to the fullest, hit the gym everyday, progress your careers, become mentally unbreakable etc.

Most girls are not even on dating apps and really don't want to meet their future husband off an app, they're out there and you'll meet yours eventually

Let life flow, don't force anything

as long as you don't ldar yall will be ok
More or less agreed but I've never went out with the types you have to jestermaxx/wine & dine/impress.

Met a diamond-in-the-rough or two off apps in the past but realizing it's not exactly the norm and I'm better off being a little more aware and & intent w/ women I come across IRL.
post 1681914303 05-02-2023, 02:51 PM
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Originally Posted By Alphametric⏩
I think I'm getting enough matches with the types of women I would date.

I'm just not getting any dates 😁.

And yeah I've been on these apps in the past, I wasn't as focused on a serious relationship like I am now. I was more looking for something short term/casual and I had success.

Maybe broaden my horizons by downloading bumble? Or tinder? Or both? But I don't want this dating app thing to consume me and I really prefer hinges features to all of the rest.



I check all these boxes. I have plenty of interest in my profile, but very little interest in actually meeting up.

Maybe I'm too picky? I like 1/20 profiles (+/-). And will match with 1/5 likes (+/-).

The pattern is almost predictable at this point. Hinge will show me 20ish profiles I don't like in a row, then 5ish profiles I like. I'll match with 1 of them. Message back and forth and either I will loose interest or they will at some point in the convo, and it mostly dies out before getting their number.

But you are right, maybe even though I want a "serious" relationship I should be more about "fun" to spark interest and curiosity at first.
I'm guessing it's your area and maybe even your age as well since you said you were older. Hinge has been really good to me in Denver and had a couple women asking me out on dates the day we matched.
post 1681918233 05-02-2023, 03:51 PM
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Originally Posted By skinnyfat88⏩
Very similar experience with Hinge the last few months.
30+ date-quality matches in 3 months or so. ~5 times I was a message or two away from asking them out/for number and that's when I got no reply back.
One date I got had gained weight since pics. The other I was kind of into but wasn't sure if she was my type physically and that was confirmed once we went out a few times.

Some friends say I message too much before asking them out but I found in the past it also helps to filter out the ones dating too many ppl at once and also just to ensure you have some common interests/things to talk about.

I'm more upfront now about the fact I have a kid (in profile vs letting them know a few messages in), as well as not matching with girls who have cats and dogs I'd be allergic to. In theory this helps find a better potential longterm match but on the other hand it sucks for the ego and missing out on a potentially fun fling.

I feel like I'm in that middle-zone of open to both short and longterm opportunities and I'd prob have a bit better luck gearing my profile one way or the other.

Bumble was awesome for me ~5 years ago. Taking a break from the apps for the time being but all-in-all, it was a disappointing few months on Hinge.
Yeah I'm considering downloading bumble and/or tinder to see what else is out there. At least with those apps (from my experience) I can potentially turn a more casual encounter to an exclusive relationship.

I've dated a few really awesome women from hinge though, historically. Didn't work out for one reason or another but when I've landed dates from that app they have all been standouts. Every single one. So I still have hope. Just feel like something is off this time around.

Got a number yesterday of a girl from the UK who is here for the summer to be a camp counselor 😂... So long term prospects with her aren't great, but let's see if she even pulls through for a date. She actually asked me if I'd show her around. So we shall see.
Originally Posted By 4North1Side2⏩
I'm guessing it's your area and maybe even your age as well since you said you were older. Hinge has been really good to me in Denver and had a couple women asking me out on dates the day we matched.
Yeah I'm sure those factors play into everything. Although, they see my age before they match me.

I have my distance set to 30 miles. Maybe I'll expand to 40 and see what happens. Also have age range capped at 30. Maybe I'll bump that up to get more movement.
post 1682056733 05-04-2023, 05:13 PM
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Originally Posted By sword_⏩
There had to be a catalyst to end it. We had one when an argument escalated to the point of her throwing glass, etc. I was insensitive up to it. I'm pretty up front with raising my issues and concerns and I did move in with her but kept my place because my lease was just recently renewed. I actually tried to end things around that time several months before this fight. Even if marriage wasn't a thing it would have ended. I will also say she is very conflict avoidant so sometimes our discussions ended up brushing it under the rug.

At a certain point we were going through the motions of things and at the heart of it we saw some very good qualities in each other. I thought that I could have fixed things and I take extreme ownership in many aspects of my life even to my own detriment. The idea of the relationship ending made me feel like a failure so perhaps before this all went down I wanted to make sure I did everything I thought I could make things work out in the end.

Now if my values with a person are misaligned or the chemistry/compatibility isn't there I'm going to be quicker to cut it off.
I see. I kind of understand why she would be mad IF her end goal is marriage after 4 years in a relationship. BUT, she is crazy to throw things at you especially glass. I'm assuming that some people don't know how to express themselves during conflicts so they avoid them or think they are minor issues.

If you know deep down inside that she is not the one, then trying to fix things is a waste of time. You are just delaying the inevitable. Sometimes failures are good because you learn from them so don't be too hard on yourself. Wishing you the best of luck in your future relationship!
post 1682784493 05-15-2023, 11:05 PM
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this chit is dead

are you all just rotting?
Balanced Test Crew
post 1682848633 05-16-2023, 11:11 PM
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lmao at running into a lot of women that are "not sure yet" about kids or "don't want kids".
A hit was sent, from the President, to raid your residence /
Because you had secret evidence, and documents /
On how they raped the continents, and it's the prominent /
Dominant Islamic, Asiatic Black Hebrew

- GZA "4th Chamber"
post 1682849473 05-16-2023, 11:40 PM
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Originally Posted By sword_⏩
lmao at running into a lot of women that are "not sure yet" about kids or "don't want kids".
women have no idea what they want srs

you really have to strike at the exact right time one is looking for something serious
Balanced Test Crew
post 1682850733 05-17-2023, 12:40 AM
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Originally Posted By sword_⏩
lmao at running into a lot of women that are "not sure yet" about kids or "don't want kids".
Why are you bringing up such serious topics (for women) in the early dating/communication stages?

Imo it will scare them or even if they give an answer on the spot, it's probably not an honest one.
Defeat the defeatist.
post 1682861943 05-17-2023, 07:56 AM
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Originally Posted By xbluexhawkx⏩
women have no idea what they want srs

you really have to strike at the exact right time one is looking for something serious
This. Ran into a cute, really accomplished and fun girl at a friend's party last weekend where we were both invited to sleep over. Had sex 3-4 times that night and the following morning, she made sure I got her number, we talked about hanging out in the future, she told me she wanted kids and realized she needed to get moving on that if she's going to do it, etc. Texts me consistently for two days, still talking about hanging out in the future, etc. Then ghosts. I guess I made the mistake of expressing interest in getting to know her better. Lol.
post 1682874413 05-17-2023, 10:59 AM
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Originally Posted By bradlehman⏩
This. Ran into a cute, really accomplished and fun girl at a friend's party last weekend where we were both invited to sleep over. Had sex 3-4 times that night and the following morning, she made sure I got her number, we talked about hanging out in the future, she told me she wanted kids and realized she needed to get moving on that if she's going to do it, etc. Texts me consistently for two days, still talking about hanging out in the future, etc. Then ghosts. I guess I made the mistake of expressing interest in getting to know her better. Lol.
A big issue that I see extremely present in dating today that isn't mentioned here at all is that women are afraid of commitment

There is instances where in the early stages of dating, a girl likes you SO MUCH she ghosts you because she doesn't want to get her feelings hurt ded fkn srs

it is a very real thing these days
Balanced Test Crew
post 1682880563 05-17-2023, 12:47 PM
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Originally Posted By xbluexhawkx⏩
A big issue that I see extremely present in dating today that isn't mentioned here at all is that women are afraid of commitment

There is instances where in the early stages of dating, a girl likes you SO MUCH she ghosts you because she doesn't want to get her feelings hurt ded fkn srs

it is a very real thing these days
Women don’t ghost because they like you too much. They ghost because there’s apparent better options on the table. There’s almost infinite “options” at arms length in modern dating.
𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖘𝖊 𝖆 𝖈𝖍𝖊𝖈𝕶, 𝖓𝖊𝖛𝖊𝖗 𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖘𝖊 𝖆 𝖇𝖎𝖙𝖈𝖍

█▓▒▒░░🧵Make trolls invisible: https://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=180234573 ░░▒▒▓█
post 1682883253 05-17-2023, 01:30 PM
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Originally Posted By Luc1fer⏩
Women don’t ghost because they like you too much. They ghost because there’s apparent better options on the table. There’s almost infinite “options” at arms length in modern dating.
Completely untrue, especially among my generation

Lots of people don’t take time to properly heal from their past relationship traumas and run whenever chit starts getting real for them
Balanced Test Crew
post 1682883373 05-17-2023, 01:32 PM
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Originally Posted By mryamamoto⏩
Why are you bringing up such serious topics (for women) in the early dating/communication stages?

Imo it will scare them or even if they give an answer on the spot, it's probably not an honest one.
It sometimes comes up once or twice in some form of fashion. Someone would ask about my past relationship and I mentioned that I wasn't sure my ex wanted kids and there was a bit of contention there. I don't ask women if they want kids, but I have mentioned in some way "when I'm a dad" etc. You do have a point.
Originally Posted By bradlehman⏩
This. Ran into a cute, really accomplished and fun girl at a friend's party last weekend where we were both invited to sleep over. Had sex 3-4 times that night and the following morning, she made sure I got her number, we talked about hanging out in the future, she told me she wanted kids and realized she needed to get moving on that if she's going to do it, etc. Texts me consistently for two days, still talking about hanging out in the future, etc. Then ghosts. I guess I made the mistake of expressing interest in getting to know her better. Lol.
Nothing you did wrong there.
Originally Posted By Luc1fer⏩
Women don’t ghost because they like you too much. They ghost because there’s apparent better options on the table. There’s almost infinite “options” at arms length in modern dating.
Originally Posted By xbluexhawkx⏩
Completely untrue, especially among my generation

Lots of people don’t take time to properly heal from their past relationship traumas and run whenever chit starts getting real for them
I agree with you there xbluexhawkx. I had sex with one woman on a second date and she basically said that she felt insecure around me and felt too rough around the edges for me. We had a GREAT date...hell it ended up in multiple sex sessions and great pillow top. She probably wasn't healed. I've met many women like that so I don't think it's about optionality.

I've had exes say to me "Do you know how many men want to be with me?!" in some form of fashion but it didn't matter because they wanted ME to commit to them whether relationship or marriage.
A hit was sent, from the President, to raid your residence /
Because you had secret evidence, and documents /
On how they raped the continents, and it's the prominent /
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post 1682884463 05-17-2023, 01:48 PM
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Originally Posted By xbluexhawkx⏩
A big issue that I see extremely present in dating today that isn't mentioned here at all is that women are afraid of commitment

There is instances where in the early stages of dating, a girl likes you SO MUCH she ghosts you because she doesn't want to get her feelings hurt ded fkn srs

it is a very real thing these days
Honestly would not surprise me at all if that is what happened. She also is in a very challenging early stage of her career and could have been concerned about jeopardizing that or whether it would be fair to someone she got involved with.
post 1682889423 05-17-2023, 03:13 PM
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Originally Posted By Luc1fer⏩
Women don’t ghost because they like you too much. They ghost because there’s apparent better options on the table. There’s almost infinite “options” at arms length in modern dating.
More so this or they just want to continue to be single and explore their options while thinking they have you locked down on the backburner.
post 1682902593 05-17-2023, 06:59 PM
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Originally Posted By mryamamoto⏩
Why are you bringing up such serious topics (for women) in the early dating/communication stages?

Imo it will scare them or even if they give an answer on the spot, it's probably not an honest one.
at a certain age, its one of those things you find out early to not waste time.

hell im only mid 20s and even still I'll ghost someone who is like im not having kids. its very off-putting.

typically I just tell a story about working with kids or something, and see how they respond. if they say something like I love kids or I love working with kids, thats a good sign for me and avoids outright asking and putting the pressure on.
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post 1683125953 05-21-2023, 02:38 PM
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#6656
  1. imbored21
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Any advice for talking to sloots at the gym? Some
total baddies at mine. I've never initiated a conversation with a stranger before so no idea what to even say or how it works.

Kinda over dating apps. All the Hinge couples i know, the man is way out of the woman's league. And that's my personal experience too. Not interested in a relationship like that.
post 1683613723 05-29-2023, 12:01 PM
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#6657
  1. InsanePain11
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Originally Posted By Luc1fer⏩
Women don’t ghost because they like you too much. They ghost because there’s apparent better options on the table. There’s almost infinite “options” at arms length in modern dating.
Many times this is true, but there’s a whole myriad of reason why people cancel or ghost. Too tired, lazy, were just there for attention/curing boredom, don’t know what they want, aren’t over an ex etc.

Keep in mind there are many women that would say the same thing about guys. I mean, I try not to but I’ve ghosted girls in the past..especially on the apps..it’s just too convenient to stop replying when you’re more interested in someone else. It’s also a crappy thing about the apps, sort of a built-in problem where people want the next best thing, or there are too many options. It’s always good to be respectful and polite and to consider people’s time so I try, but I’ve been guilty of this too.
post 1683615833 05-29-2023, 12:48 PM
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#6658
  1. imbored21
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Originally Posted By InsanePain11⏩
Many times this is true, but there’s a whole myriad of reason why people cancel or ghost. Too tired, lazy, were just there for attention/curing boredom, don’t know what they want, aren’t over an ex etc.

Keep in mind there are many women that would say the same thing about guys. I mean, I try not to but I’ve ghosted girls in the past..especially on the apps..it’s just too convenient to stop replying when you’re more interested in someone else. It’s also a crappy thing about the apps, sort of a built-in problem where people want the next best thing, or there are too many options. It’s always good to be respectful and polite and to consider people’s time so I try, but I’ve been guilty of this too.
fax bro. got all these white girls on read. They just arne't as cute as asians.
post 1684645133 06-14-2023, 10:59 PM
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#6659
  1. Luc1fer
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Thread buried under pages of spam
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█▓▒▒░░🧵Make trolls invisible: https://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=180234573 ░░▒▒▓█
post 1684645473 06-14-2023, 11:11 PM
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#6660
  1. pondus_levo
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Still getting matches.

I mostly swipe left, though. 99% of the women left on dating apps are either obese or tatted and pierced up liberal feminists with pronouns and vaccine/pride status.

No thanks, Jeffrey.
Forever alone? Attraction and keeping the girl chasing you - http://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=131498033

You will never know your limits, unless you push yourself past the imaginary lines you have drawn in the sand.

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