"Easier" (not easy) in the sense of being able to assess more quickly whether you are a match with someone, and therefore not having to spend as much time deciding whether they are relationship material. With the combined rate of divorce and number of people deciding to remain single, I didn't think the numbers would be that bad. Also, in shape and active would simply be a plus for me and not a complete pre-requisite.

if you work out 6 days a week and are 10% BF, you're okay dating a woman who wants to sit at home and do nothing and is 30% bodyfat?

if you work out 6 days a week and are 10% BF, you're okay dating a woman who wants to sit at home and do nothing and is 30% bodyfat?

Most men will take whatever they can get. That's what we've been conditioned to accept.

maybe what you've been conditioned to accept. I would rather LDAR than date a fat chick or a chick with kids or some other nonsense


being single >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> relationship with ****ty prospect

Better to put energy into finding something else you're good at than being beautiful or it will hit you hard later. Still if you constantly get attention you will notice when it's going down.

^^This. Good to know men can empathize with women on this....And I'm out.....

Or, you know, there could be a spectrum between "fit and active" versus "sit at home and do nothing."

There's nothing in between the specrturm according to the Used Car Salesman aka MagicCarWater. Everything is black and white to him.

There are women who are fit and active who may have 30% body fat. Not everyone eats tilapia and brown rice at every meal. In fact, a lot of middle-aged people at my gym who are there daily are overweight.

There's nothing in between the specrturm according to the Used Car Salesman aka MagicCarWater. Everything is black and white to him.

I don't think you can be fit at 30%, boyo. Active, sure, but a 40 year old woman sitting at 30% is going to look like a sack of door knobs.

It's always funny to me the women that have been married for decades giving dating advice in this day and age. Honestly no offense Kimm and Rabbit, but you have absolutely no idea what dating now is like. Silence and I have been in the trenches of this dating hell for several years so I think we can speak to it far more than most.

You all know I'm not looking for Chad and I want someone my own age. I don't have unrealistic standards. I want someone who's a good and loyal person and is healthy and fit. Because I am all of that. Of course they have to be attractive tome. I've been attracted to all different types so that's not some crazy requirement like everyone makes it out to be. So my list goes like this: Around my age, single, good person at their core, active and doesn't live in their moms basement. I don't have income requirements. I honestly don't GAF what they do for a living as long as they are a hard worker. You'd think this would be easy to find, but it's not in this day and age of hookup apps.

As far as aging. Well I definitely prefer aging to dying so I'm going to have to be ok with it. Thankfully I have good genetics, have never smoked, don't drink much and don't do drugs so I have a leg up on a lot of people. Add to that I eat healthy and I work out. I also have a personality so getting some wrinkles isn't going to be the end of me.

It's always funny to me the women that have been married for decades giving dating advice in this day and age. Honestly no offense Kimm and Rabbit, but you have absolutely no idea what dating now is like. Silence and I have been in the trenches of this dating hell for several years so I think we can speak to it far more than most.

You all know I'm not looking for Chad and I want someone my own age. I don't have unrealistic standards. I want someone who's a good and loyal person and is healthy and fit. Because I am all of that. Of course they have to be attractive tome. I've been attracted to all different types so that's not some crazy requirement like everyone makes it out to be. So my list goes like this: Around my age, single, good person at their core, active and doesn't live in their moms basement. I don't have income requirements. I honestly don't GAF what they do for a living as long as they are a hard worker. You'd think this would be easy to find, but it's not in this day and age of hookup apps.

As far as aging. Well I definitely prefer aging to dying so I'm going to have to be ok with it. Thankfully I have good genetics, have never smoked, don't drink much and don't do drugs so I have a leg up on a lot of people. Add to that I eat healthy and I work out. I also have a personality so getting some wrinkles isn't going to be the end of me.

I'm a 45 year old hot woman and what is this ?

You don’t seem to know much about female body levels and the range of ideal/fit

You should look it up before spouting off again ernie

You specified 40+ dude

Legs you have a point, and I agree with Kim here

But I have watched / helped an older Swiss friend navigate match.com, meet a few people (I was her back up who knew where she was) and settle down with a really lovely guy long term post divorce. He is older than her, has a child who hates her but they have a whole lot of fun and respect for each other after 2 years

Good god, that's depressing. I had this notion that it would be somewhat easier to find someone at middle age because of the maturity level and more easily being able to identify what you want, but it sounds like the pool is really shallow.

No offense taken but I wasn't giving dating advice. I think we can agree that some of these women's standards and what they're looking for can be ridiculous. We see screen shots of women's dating profiles posted here all the time. By the time you get through their list of everything they're looking for...that sense of entitlement starts creeping in and in my mind would be a huge turnoff for most guys.

I think to myself, "Good luck in finding needle in a haystack goals of 2019!"

You're right I've been out of the dating scene for years. But if for some awful reason I was back into it I wouldn't be using apps. I would be out in the real word meeting people, striking up conversations and might even do the occasional cold approach if I was interested in someone. I'm quiet but I'm not shy or socially awkward. I don't have a problem with rejection as it's part of life.

Would it work? Maybe or maybe not.

Realize that literally every single person thinks their standards are "reasonable" in the same way that every person considers themself to be more intelligent than average, their kids are the best kids, a great driver, top 5% at their job, et al. It doesn't mean a whole lot.

If you reject 99 out of a literal 100 relatively normally distributed men who approach you, that only leaves 2 objective options. You are ultra picky or the unluckiest woman on the planet (along with Silencespeaks).

You don’t seem to know much about female body levels and the range of ideal/fit

You should look it up before spouting off again ernie



Legs you have a point, and I agree with Kim here

But I have watched / helped an older Swiss friend navigate match.com, meet a few people (I was her back up who knew where she was) and settle down with a really lovely guy long term post divorce. He is older than her, has a child who hates her but they have a whole lot of fun and respect for each other after 2 years

I'm not in the dating scene but I know plenty of people who are. I got a brother 38 divorced with 2 small kids, sister 48 divorced 1 grown child, daughter 31 divorced 3 small kids and I got friends. Some use apps, some use apps and real world combined and other real world alone.My sister seems to do better compared to the rest of them. She doesn't use apps but she's constantly out on some type of adventure meeting tons of people. She's petite/fit and is similar to Legz when it comes to wanting a guy who's fit/in shape. Doesn't have to be in the gym but needs to be active.

I think I know enough to be dangerous.

I'd bet she's not shy if she's out meeting a lot of people.

It's funny she's more quiet than I am and sometimes comes across as standoffish. I'm always baffled to how she meets so many people but it's always these types of adventures where everyone attending is into the same thing...that probably has something to do with it.

You don't seem shy online at all. You come across as confident, well spoken, easy to talk to, laid back, etc...If you can somehow find a way to break out of your shyness and bring your online persona out into the real world you're fukin golden srs.

With lots of attention is directed towards them when they are young, then suddenly they see their beauty fade away. Do they just accept it or most go into depression? Especially these days when social media gives even fatties tons of attention and love.