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Thread: ITT: 50 year old me drops wisdom on 20 year old me

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05-22-2013, 11:04 PM
#181
Originally Posted By Deenur⏩
And yes I joined in 2003, and my rep power is only 319.
I was totally off MISC for over 3 years because I had lost faith in quality threads.
You brahs have helped me believe again.

We're all gonna make it
I'm sure the reps were worth more way back then though
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05-22-2013, 11:11 PM
#182
What do you do for a living ? And how did you figure out what you wanted to REALLY do?
Bodybuilding is much like any other sport. To be successful, you must dedicate yourself 100% to your training, diet and mental approach.
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05-22-2013, 11:20 PM
#183
Originally Posted By Deenur⏩
Well guys, I hit 50 years old this year.
I have had good years and not good years. But if I had the opportunity to go back and talk to 20 year old me, and have 20 year old me listen, this is what I would say:

-Figure out early what is important; you cannot do this early enough
-Dont spend so much money on liquor. I could have bought a brand new SUV by now
-Pick a few things and do them well and stick with them, quit chasing random crap
-Select a career you love regardless of the money, cause you never know when you will be kicked to the curb, unless you want to be self-employed.
-You treat people like crap, you will get treated like crap. Expect it, and no cryin
-Eat right.
-Whats outside (aesthetic) is important, but whats more important is who you are inside (no whiteknight, just reality, deal with it)
-Insecure people always have to have someone/something else to blame. Dont be that guy.

(More later, and BTW no amount of rage on your part will change the validity of my words):
Originally Posted By Deenur⏩
Just me but, you will find that one that you love and she loves you back. But its not going to be found in endless parties or clubbing or going from one empty sex encounter to the next. You guys are going to call me old fashioned, but I have been married once, to the same woman for 25 years, and we still love each other, respect each other and like each other.
Originally Posted By Deenur⏩
Cause that's a dead end that leads to emptiness in the long run; you find out what a solid fam is worth when you have to face testicular cancer and beat it.
Originally Posted By Deenur⏩
I write professionally and for leisure, I shoot, I spend time with my amazing fam
Originally Posted By Deenur⏩
I'm not going to kid you, love is not easy, and I had my heart broken a few times. Don't let that turn you into a narcissist pig. Stay guarded, but remain open. (Great now I sound like a fortune cookie).

Love (and muscle) takes time, and effort.
Originally Posted By Deenur⏩
You know why they act like that? Because they don't know who they are. They crave the attention to give them validity in themselves. Stay away from a woman that has to have someone else verify her worth for her. Or care about her enough to help her make the changes to see in herself that she is valuable.
Originally Posted By Deenur⏩
You can't leave a trail of hurt people in your wake and not have it cost you.
Originally Posted By Deenur⏩
Dude I might get slammed for this, but…. and this only relates to the guys who want love

You will come across THE ONE in your life. If you haven't yet, just wait, you will. If she is, no one will come close to her in your mind, and I'm not talking about thinking you are in love with a porn star.

You will rate every other female by her (looks, attitude, personality, interaction with you, etc…). No one but her will measure up. If you can't say that about anyone, you prob haven't met her yet. When you do meet her, don't screw it up. Be real, go after her, respect her, and let her love on you too.

Can you imagine sharing good times with her when you aren't having sex? Then she might be the ONE. If not, its just your bonar talking. That's why I said, slim down on the things you concentrate on.

Don't be so busy keeping yourself busy with things that don't matter, that you miss her. Trust yourself. You will know. This is what I really believe.
Originally Posted By Deenur⏩
I would limit myself to about 4 things: school, work (if applicable), important hobby, and some relationships (gf or buddies). Remember that people who don't have any drive to do anything are going to be the biggest drain on your time.
Originally Posted By Deenur⏩
I used to get mad, but now I feel sorry for people who put me down; they're just doing it to make themselves seem something, I don't know, cool or big.

I think all grades are important, it sets a stage for how you approach the next level. Having a good time (temporary feels) is overrated. I'm not saying never do it, I'm saying its way overdone.

It depends on your goals for girls- sleep with as many as possible, or want to find The ONE? Not enough info.
Originally Posted By Deenur⏩
Let's add:
Don't let what you look like determine who you are.

In my early 40s I was doing great. Actually sup testing for Legal Gear when the had product X out. Sustained a major groin pull. Thought I would heal up much quicker. Have put on 60 lbs and now trying to get back in shape.

Testicle cancer tried to take me out last year. I kicked its ugly a$$. Now totally cancer free. Cost me a nut, but that's not who I am anyway. You really find out how valuable family is at those times.
Originally Posted By Deenur⏩
When I was in early 20s I was serious alchy, and didn't care about anything. Fiddle farted around with college. Didn't think I would care about anyone. All that changed when I manned up and confessed my feels for The ONE, even though I was expecting to get shot down in flames. I didn't get shot down.

I over think everything, but there are times when you just have to say "I'm goin forward and will take it as it happens!"

You can get paralysis from analysis, right?
Originally Posted By Deenur⏩
Try being 28, living in government housing and having your 2 year old daughter ask you, daddy how come we have to live in a pound for people?
And you say, because honey, when I was younger and should have been learning in college so I could get a better job, I was getting drunk instead.
And she asks, How come you didn't love me and mommy enough not to do that then?

I don't care who you are, you'll cry.

summed up some of the better replies by OP for you lazy kunts.

we all gonna make it.

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05-22-2013, 11:23 PM
#184
Good stuff OP. I completely stopped drinking alcohol 2,5 years ago. It realy improved my life and I will never drink alcohol again (dead srs).

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05-22-2013, 11:33 PM
#185
Welcome our new father of the misc
Originally Posted By Deenur⏩
Well guys, I hit 50 years old this year.
I have had good years and not good years. But if I had the opportunity to go back and talk to 20 year old me, and have 20 year old me listen, this is what I would say:

-Figure out early what is important; you cannot do this early enough
-Dont spend so much money on liquor. I could have bought a brand new SUV by now
-Pick a few things and do them well and stick with them, quit chasing random crap
-Select a career you love regardless of the money, cause you never know when you will be kicked to the curb, unless you want to be self-employed.
-You treat people like crap, you will get treated like crap. Expect it, and no cryin
-Eat right.
-Whats outside (aesthetic) is important, but whats more important is who you are inside (no whiteknight, just reality, deal with it)
-Insecure people always have to have someone/something else to blame. Dont be that guy.

(More later, and BTW no amount of rage on your part will change the validity of my words):
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05-23-2013, 10:35 AM
#186
Excellent thread. Thank you. Good to see it's not all about smashing.

OP, how many girls did you bang before your wife? Do you find yourself comparing any experiences?

Did you ask your wife her number?
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05-23-2013, 03:22 PM
#187
Originally Posted By MuscleTransform⏩
What do you do for a living ? And how did you figure out what you wanted to REALLY do?
OK this is interesting. I do a ton of things.
My day job is casino surveillance. I also go to storage auctions with my wife, and we resell on ebay, craigslist, etc. She refinishes some of the furniture we find. I do freelance ACAD drafting (used to do it full time in the Const industry before economy tanked). I also write, hobby and professional.

Ever since 7th grade I have wanted to write full time. It is in me and just comes out. If I never make it full time $$$, I don't care. Its the one thing I do that I am absolutely passionate about. I have, and always will, write.
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05-23-2013, 03:47 PM
#188
Originally Posted By hannibalnavies⏩
OP, how many girls did you bang before your wife?
Do you find yourself comparing any experiences?
Did you ask your wife her number?
More than 1, less than 50. Not worth the heartache IMHO

I had to fight the compare fight in my head in the past, at a time when I was insecure in myself and I was taking it out on her. Now not a prob, and I appreciate who she is to me.

We were a blind date set up by a mutual friend, so we got connected that way
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05-23-2013, 04:13 PM
#189
op what are your thoughts on money and saving young? im pissed because alot of my money goes towards bills/rent
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05-23-2013, 04:20 PM
#190
How did you meet your wife? And what was the strongest feel you have ever felt in 50 yrs? Could be good or bad.
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05-23-2013, 04:28 PM
#191
Originally Posted By bmp010⏩
How did you meet your wife? And what was the strongest feel you have ever felt in 50 yrs? Could be good or bad.
Wife was a blind date from a mutual female friend.
Lost my dad last year. He was 90. Still feels bad man.
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05-23-2013, 04:31 PM
#192
how does it feel to be 50 and know that i can make you my bitch with the click of a button
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05-23-2013, 04:31 PM
#193
Originally Posted By mikevall⏩
op what are your thoughts on money and saving young? im pissed because alot of my money goes towards bills/rent
I get that. You have to either: cut expenses like going out, or get a 2nd job, or don't save.

We had all our saved money used up when I lost my construction job 3 years ago.
Saving is overrated if you think its going to save you from everything. I'm not saying don't save, but I am saying don't be surprised if it gets eaten up by some unforeseen something.
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05-23-2013, 04:33 PM
#194
Originally Posted By Skinnygeorge⏩
how does it feel to be 50 and know that i can make you my bitch with the click of a button
Uh yeah, sorry to hear you think that way.
The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. Thomas Jefferson

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05-23-2013, 04:34 PM
#195
How do you feel about the general direction of our society and laziness? (nobody interested in fitness, brb smartphones, social media, xbox, etc)?
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05-23-2013, 04:35 PM
#196
Originally Posted By DumptruckDonald⏩
How do you feel about the general direction of our society and laziness? (nobody interested in fitness, brb smartphones, social media, xbox, etc)?
Agreed. Its a conversation that my sons and daughter and I have often.
Awares: no one is going to do it for you, its up to you.
The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. Thomas Jefferson

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05-23-2013, 04:37 PM
#197
Originally Posted By I3elowAverage⏩
that 2 year old asking those questions is some straight up Pursuit of Happiness chit
Gracias.
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05-23-2013, 04:37 PM
#198
thanks for the good advice man

my Dad tells me pretty much the same things all the time.
Follow your dreams, or spend the rest of your life working for someone who did.

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05-23-2013, 04:38 PM
#199
Originally Posted By sdshakal⏩
thanks for the good advice man

my Dad tells me pretty much the same things all the time.
He sounds smart. Give him an ear
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05-23-2013, 04:43 PM
#200
This post is long-
Addressing an earlier question with a more in depth response: How to find quality women.
Women want security, but go about it in different ways.

1st category woman has decided that her security is in attention. These are the girls you call sloots. They are willing to do whatever it takes for attention, and as long as it is in place, they are OK. As soon as they feel that attention slipping, they panic. And will continue to do so until the attention that gives them security is back in place. It does not help these girls to hump and dump them, and IMHO doesn’t help you either. Stay away, or care enough about one of them to help her find the real value in herself. She will calm down once she gets that aspect.

2nd category woman has decided that her security is in money. If you don’t have it, you don’t have her. She will be OK as long as the money is in place. As soon as they feel that money is slipping away, they panic. And will continue to do so until the money that gives them security is back in place. Stay away or find a way to help one that you really care about. I do not know how to help these women other than with awares that there is more to life than money.

3rd Category is woman in between attention addict and money addict: nice girl. Nice girl seems to have her security in something else bigger than her. This category is broken into 3 sub categories: hippie girl, family girl and church girl.

Hippie girl loves nature and earth and sky. They may not shave their pits or use standard deodorant. They can be very affectionate and dedicated as long as you share their priorities. My cousin dated hippie girl in high school. I have never dated hippie girl. I like shaved pits.

Family girl is very close to her family. If you date her, be prepared for questions from her brothers and her dad about your intentions, You probably won’t be able to talk this girl into sex. She’s waiting for a guy that will care for her and become part of her family. Don’t get me wrong, its not a bad gig if you are seriously looking for something permanent and real. Just be real.

Church girl may cross over with family girl, but doesn’t have to. This girl has strong convictions about life and priorities. They are extremely dedicated to someone who they feel is sincere about them, and God too. This is not the gig for every guy. Drinking could become an issue in the relationship, so could profanity, and media choices. However, these girl are often unspoiled, pretty and intelligent. Between my sons friend and daughters friends, I could name half a dozen (probably more) who are legit 7+/10 and are sweet and intelligent.

This is what I would tell 20 year old me about how I see things. You may disagree, and that’s OK.
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05-23-2013, 04:48 PM
#201
Deenur,

Thank you

That will be all.
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05-23-2013, 04:51 PM
#202
Much respect OP.

Even at the age of 16 I wish I could start my teenage years over. My life would be so different.
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05-23-2013, 04:54 PM
#203
Originally Posted By danlsann⏩
Much respect OP.

Even at the age of 16 I wish I could start my teenage years over. My life would be so different.
Brah, you're good. You're gonna make it.
My boys are 17 and 18.5 and awesome young men. I tell them all the time that they are so cool, I would hang out with them even if they weren't my sons.
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05-23-2013, 05:31 PM
#204
Requests to keep this thread going
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05-23-2013, 05:35 PM
#205
thanks man, im 22. Im just guna do what i enjoy and if im poor im poor. Experiences > Money.
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05-23-2013, 05:45 PM
#206
Not even 20 yet and afraid to fuk up. Feelsscaryman.
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05-23-2013, 05:51 PM
#207
Just gonna pop in here and say much thanks! i try to stay away from the misc but threads like these make me feel guilty. <3 You are the man
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05-23-2013, 06:01 PM
#208
Just wanted to say thanks. Been feeling a bit cluttered lately. Almost wanted to leave the misc.

I actually wrote a lot of your advice down on paper. (srs)

Will be brainstorming it.
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05-23-2013, 06:04 PM
#209
Originally Posted By continuume⏩
Just wanted to say thanks. Been feeling a bit cluttered lately. Almost wanted to leave the misc.

I actually wrote a lot of your advice down on paper. (srs)

Will be brainstorming it.
Wow that's quite a complement. Thanks.
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05-23-2013, 06:08 PM
#210
2 questions OP:

1. How religious/spiritual would you say you are?

2. If you had come into a large amount of money early on do you think it would have changed who you are now?
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  2. You may not post replies
  3. You may not post attachments
  4. You may not edit your posts