Been on 6 dates with this girl, over about a month and a half. She just broke up with my on Monday night and I'm heartbroken, here's what happened.

First, some important background: On our first 4 dates, she would text after the date. Sometimes like 30 minutes after the date. After the third it took her a couple days, but she reached out just before I was going to. On our 5th I reached out a couple days later.

Now, this:

Our sixth date was on Friday, we went out for sushi dinner then went back to my place. Watched a movie, she spent the night, left Saturday morning at 5 AM. Had to help her friends move.

I texted her Sunday at 5PM, asking her how the move and everything else was. She got back to me 4 hours later and told me, then asked me a question. I responded and asked her if she wanted to hang out again sometime this week.

She got back to me Monday, kinda dodged the question but said "you know, it's OK to text me within 48 hours of hanging out". I said that I did, and I just didn't want to hound her and give her some space (and really, I didn't want to come off as needy). She said she's used to more communication, especially after sleeping with someone. And that's she's "not sure" about hanging out again.

And that was pretty much it. I further tried to explain and I apologized, saying I didn't want to feel like I was bothering her. She said I wouldn't have been bothering her, that she would have been excited to hear from me.

She also said that me not being vaccinated (and not really wanting to) "would eventually be an issue" for her.

And that was it. She dumped me because I didn't text her soon enough after she left, and apparently cause I'm unvaccinated. I feel like **** and am constantly asking myself "what if".

My question is - is that a good reason to break up with me? She didn't even want to work through it, there was no warning. She was just...done. What do you all think?

Important - her roommate/best friend is a very clingy girl. She panics if a guy she's dating doesn't text her back within a few hours. The girl I was dating previously told me she didn't like that I didn't text her right away after our 5th date (she told her, "screw him"), but that she understood why. I think her roommate clearly has a lot of influence and control on her and probably had a factor in this.

Cliffs:
-6th date, girl comes over to my place and spends the night.
-Leaves at 5AM
-I text her next day at 5PM
-She didn't like I took that long to text her, after sleeping with her. Also doesn't like that I'm unvaccinated.
-Ends it with me

Do you even cliff bruh?

I reluctantly added, but the details matter

It's cool bro. Only a month wasted. Just move to the next. If you are after a serious relationship then choose a philipino. They are very serious and invested. Don't be a lazy **** and make sure to put effort in. You were a dik about txt after a whole day. Also these 2 reasons are small. It means she was pretty desperate to find an out of the relationship. She wanted out, that's why these reasons are petty. Good luck bro.

well that's what you get for being a miscer who tries to act cool and not text back or show interest. She reached out quickly after the first 4 dates, did you ever reach out to her first, and within 30 min? Maybe she thinks she's doing all the work. She made it clear how she likes to communicate, and you just kinda ignored it. Are you looking for a gf or are you just trying to act hard? And while you were apologizing, did you just "apologize" or did you REALLY apologize, and say you'd try to text her sooner next time? If you had too much pride to try to fix the problem rather than force someone else to forgive without compensation then that's just not gonna work out man. You might think that not texting back immediately is cool, well clearly some girls don't like "cool" people like that, so you can keep acting that way and find someone who does.

In my opinion she was into you, but she was smart, she realized quickly that your lack of communication is incompatible with her idea of a relationship she wants, so she cut if off early rather than let it drag on. Yes she was right to do it. She's done playing games with boys, she wants a man, so she's taking the initiative to get what she wants.

Then why didn't she text me after I invited her to my house? Would have been easy to say "hey thanks for having me over, I had a great time"

I think she's too picky and if she finds one thing she doesn't like, she dumps the guy. She told me she's been on 35 first dates, and only 2 guys before me had it go anywhere (where they hooked up) but she eventually dumped those guys too

see you're expecting her to continue doing all the work again and you were obliviously ignoring her needs. after the 4th date, she probably started sh*x testing you to see how slowly you text back. After the 5th and 6th date, she confirmed her fears and gave up on you. That's why she didn't continue to text you early, because in her opinion, you were supposed to do it and pass the test.

So she suddenly flips from texting me first, to then expecting me to text her first? And not just first, but right after the date?

she didn't "flip", that would imply she expects you to text her back quickly from now on and will no longer text you quickly should you guys continue dating. She just diverged from her usual behavior just these two times, gave you two strikes. I'm not saying she is objectively right and that every girl does that, I'm just saying she does this and wants this in a relationship. What she saw in you was incompatible with that vision.

saw your edit above, yeah perhaps she is a bit picky, that could be part of it. she knows what she wants. if it's salvageable, you could try to work it out by compromising and giving her more of what she wants, if she's worth it of course.

sloot of peace ... just move on OP

be glad you only invested 1 month could have been much worse if you invested 1 year or more

also don't forget to take her ass to North Carolina - 1 way ticket

She's obviously not the love of your life if she's going to break up with you over something so petty. No reason to turn yourself into a dumb simp for a piece of ass. Go find a woman who appreciates you.

Uh sounds like you dodged a bullet. Liberal women are nuts

on the surface those seem like flimsy excuses to me. maybe after sleeping with you it just didn't feel right and she looked for reasons to bail. if she was that crazy about you this would be a conversation perhaps but not a confrontation like how it sounded.

like, ok now we're to the next level its cool to text me whenever. that's fine to talk about with a new(er) partner. but to break up over that and the vax? gotta be more than that.

This. If I invested enough to get to the point of sleeping with someone I'll be willing to give them a chance with something like that. Especially since she didn't make it clear what her wants/needs were in the first place.

Judging by her last text and her past with breaking things off with other guys after 1-2 months, it's not salvageable. It's over.

I shouldn't have to measure my every move.

If something was going to come of this I think we could have just gone with the flow and not ended it over something so petty.

Then why not just say "I didn't really feel a physical connection with you" or some **** like that?

I guess her past mentions that her *roommate* didn't like that I took too long to text after a date were a hint that she wanted me to. I just missed it.

Left at 5AM and her best excuse was she didn't like that you only text her at normal end of work day hours and you don't have a placebo in your veins.

Sounds like the real reason is you're a horrible lay, srs. She left early enough to avoid having to look you in the eye to tell you this. Says it all, really.

i can't explain why she'd duck 'connection' talk with you and go with something like taking too long to text. people aren't honest about their reasons, often.

all i'm saying is if things are that great between you two, you can overcome such a trivial issue as how long someone waits to text the other. once you're dating somebody the whole idea is that you can be yourself and say whatever you want, whenever you want, not look at your watch and be worried that you didn't wait long enough.

She had to help her friends move at 8, she was gonna leave at 7 at the latest, and even then she would have been in a hurry. She naturally woke up around 5, and figured she was awake enough that it was better to leave then than crawl back into bed for only a couple more hours. And...knowing her, I think she would have dropped the "there wasn't a physical connection" line if that was the case.Exactly. I shouldn't have to measure my every move.

The texting thing is easy to come to a compromise on if you both feel you are in fact working towards a relationship.

Not sure if the vaccine issue is salvageable.
Also, she seems to be going on so many dates that she expects something/someone who will fit seamlessly into her life the exact way she wants with absolutely zero hesitation to next them once she finds the slightest flaw (in her mind) which is probably a recipe for failure.

Probably not the one for you OP.

I mean, you're kind of an idiot for always playing the PUA game and not just showing genuine interest in a girl you were legitimately interested.

That being said, she's kind of an idiot for being mad about it when she clearly wasn't invested enough to try and make it work. She was clearly looking for an out or y'all would still be talking/making plans.

Yup, single for 5 years. 35 first dates. Has a history of dumping guys 1-2 months in. I think she's looking for someone that is exactly like her. Texts the way she does, gets vaccinated without hesitation, etc. If one criteria isn't met, it's over.Ok, but I *did* text her after the last two dates. It's not like I didn't initiate and ask her out for more dates. I did all those things. Initiate, make dates, told her I liked her.

If she was looking for an out, then why did she come back to my place after dinner? Clearly something happened between her coming to my place and the text I sent her Sunday.

Whatever, OP. Important thing is it didn’t work out. Why are you still hung up on her? Go permanent NC and find a girl who wants you.

Because it was an time/emotional investment that didn't work out.

There was clearly potential and she just pulled the plug. It ****en hurts getting dumped. I'm doing NC and am moving on, still doesn't eliminate the pain.

She was obviously the best, mane.

Woman wanted attention from you

You played it too cool

It happens man. The pain is justified but just keep doing your thing and it should be gone in a few weeks.

She would've never reached her "potential" while with you anyways. If she ever changes, it will be because she learns some lessons the hard way ie reflecting on the opportunities she passed up when years go by and she is left without the relationship she desires.

Thanks. I feel the same way - she may look back on missed opportunities because she was so picky. Ending things over not sending a text quickly enough.

Wish I could rep ya again - your advice is always the best.

Going on a date with a new girl tomorrow. I'm in mental hell right now but gotta force myself out of this.

EDIT: But do you think I actually screwed up or was there really nothing I could do with this one?

You didn't lay the pipe right. Move on.

You did things right. Just stay no contact. She might get curious and reach out. If not too bad, new sloots are waiting for you.