Log In

Your email is not your username

Register

If you were a member of the old Bodybuilding.com forums and would like to reuse your previous username, you can request it below. We use your email only for registration and do not store it. For more information, please see our Privacy Policy.

Confirm your email

A registration code was sent to your email. Enter it here.

Welcome

You have successfully setup your account.

Sign in

Quick Navigation Bottom Misc
Forum » Steps to Take Prior to Marriage?....
  1. Results 1 to 16 of 16
  2. Page 1 of 1

Thread: Steps to Take Prior to Marriage?....

post 1616898611 09-18-2020, 11:33 AM
-
#1
  1. Ironmanlet
  2. Adamantium User
  1. Ironmanlet
  2. Adamantium User
  3. Join Date: Aug 2009
  4. Location: Cajun Country
  5. Age: 40
  6. Height: 5'7"
  7. Weight: 185 lbs
  8. Posts: 52,304
  9. Subscribers: 4
  10. Rep Power: 415534

Steps to Take Prior to Marriage?....

Don’t get married. So we got that out of the way. We don’t have to dwell on that anymore. It’s over.

If I were to take my gf/fiancée/ONS to a pastor and ask him to marry us, he would require we take certain steps. Of course these would mostly involve the context of the religious sacrament of marriage. But that is not all marriage is.

For some reason, we have decided to involve the government in our personal relationships, and this is a huge part of marriage.

So, outside of the religious realm, if you were going to marry someone, what things would you do in order to reach that goal?

Things like ensure financial security (as that is part of the government involvement), outline individual and collective goals you wish to achieve, etc.

I mean, you could just go to a court and get married. But I feel like there should be more preparation.

So what do you do prior to getting married? Short term/long term, etc. anything
“The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood. Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.“

PS: Don't eat poop, just don't let the idea of it stop you from living life to its fullest.
post 1616898961 09-18-2020, 11:37 AM
-
#2
  1. 78novacaine
  2. Registered User
  1. 78novacaine
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Jan 2019
  4. Posts: 15,477
  5. Rep Power: 176552
My wife moved in when after we got engaged, we set a date and a budget, and buckled down and put all our extra cash (besides what went into savings/investments) into a joint account to cover the wedding expenses 100%. Both of us refuse to go into CC debt, especially for something as frivolous as what amounts to a big party.

I would say just make sure you are both on the same page with major financial/life goals and the rest all kind of falls into place. At least that has been my experience.
Permabulk/bloatlord Crew
Tradie Crew
HTC
post 1616899041 09-18-2020, 11:38 AM
-
#3
  1. dopamine72
  2. Endorphin Junkie
  1. dopamine72
  2. Endorphin Junkie
  3. Join Date: Apr 2009
  4. Location: California, United States
  5. Posts: 32,991
  6. Rep Power: 228656
Step 1: Don't get married
Journal: https://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=139898123&page=240
post 1616899541 09-18-2020, 11:43 AM
-
#4
  1. Ironmanlet
  2. Adamantium User
  1. Ironmanlet
  2. Adamantium User
  3. Join Date: Aug 2009
  4. Location: Cajun Country
  5. Age: 40
  6. Height: 5'7"
  7. Weight: 185 lbs
  8. Posts: 52,304
  9. Subscribers: 4
  10. Rep Power: 415534
Originally Posted By 78novacaine⏩
My wife moved in when after we got engaged, we set a date and a budget, and buckled down and put all our extra cash (besides what went into savings/investments) into a joint account to cover the wedding expenses 100%. Both of us refuse to go into CC debt, especially for something as frivolous as what amounts to a big party.

I would say just make sure you are both on the same page with major financial/life goals and the rest all kind of falls into place. At least that has been my experience.
That makes sense. I appreciate the thoughtful response. I wasn’t really asking about the ceremony itself, but I guess that is a big part of it. I mean, for the girl, right? That is hers. Not ours.

You and your wife talk about things like kids before hand?

I envision a very detailed plan (only to deviate from lol). Almost like a strategy, but with room for flexibility.

You talk about things like dealing with obnoxious in laws before hand?
“The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood. Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.“

PS: Don't eat poop, just don't let the idea of it stop you from living life to its fullest.
post 1616899691 09-18-2020, 11:44 AM
-
#5
  1. Preban_AR15
  2. 922r compliant
  1. Preban_AR15
  2. 922r compliant
  3. Join Date: Aug 2009
  4. Location: Houston, Texas, United States
  5. Age: 47
  6. Posts: 10,084
  7. Rep Power: 100771
I didn't get married till I was 38 and I'm glad.

We got married through the church and to your point, NO, it's not just about the religious sacrament of marriage that the pastor will cover.

We had to answer questionnaires regarding finances, how much money we wanted to spend on the wedding, kids.... I mean it went into extreme depth.

Few days later we were called back and basically told our compatibility factor. Luckily for me no red flags but he told us finances and money spent on weddings are the biggest blunders. Make sure you are on the same page for finances!

Regarding our wedding, we kept a strict 75 guest limit. We had expensive catering and premium open bar all night. I didn't want a bunch of relatives that we don't care bout showing up (srs). We both agreed and had close friends and family only. We both had family "inviting" themselves and we put our foot down.

EDIT strong join date *******
⌨Miscing While Working яєω⌨
☆☆☆MISC Firearms яєω☆☆☆
⌨Neg Anti Hover Threads яєω⌨
post 1616901231 09-18-2020, 11:58 AM
-
#6
  1. Ironmanlet
  2. Adamantium User
  1. Ironmanlet
  2. Adamantium User
  3. Join Date: Aug 2009
  4. Location: Cajun Country
  5. Age: 40
  6. Height: 5'7"
  7. Weight: 185 lbs
  8. Posts: 52,304
  9. Subscribers: 4
  10. Rep Power: 415534
Originally Posted By Preban_AR15⏩
I didn't get married till I was 38 and I'm glad.

We got married through the church and to your point, NO, it's not just about the religious sacrament of marriage that the pastor will cover.

We had to answer questionnaires regarding finances, how much money we wanted to spend on the wedding, kids.... I mean it went into extreme depth.

Few days later we were called back and basically told our compatibility factor. Luckily for me no red flags but he told us finances and money spent on weddings are the biggest blunders. Make sure you are on the same page for finances!

Regarding our wedding, we kept a strict 75 guest limit. We had expensive catering and premium open bar all night. I didn't want a bunch of relatives that we don't care bout showing up (srs). We both agreed and had close friends and family only. We both had family "inviting" themselves and we put our foot down.

EDIT strong join date *******
So what about my join date? Lol.

I have never talked to a pastor about preparing for marriage, so that was an ignorant assumption. I’m glad you pointed that out to me
“The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood. Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.“

PS: Don't eat poop, just don't let the idea of it stop you from living life to its fullest.
post 1616901471 09-18-2020, 12:01 PM
-
#7
  1. hoganrulz
  2. mreatassbtchslapr
  1. hoganrulz
  2. mreatassbtchslapr
  3. Join Date: Feb 2007
  4. Posts: 47,761
  5. Rep Power: 284006
Moving in definitely seems to be something to get out of the way first. Chit have a couple kids first too, make sure she's not a psychotic bitch after having a kid.
Formerly HandBrah, LipBrah & FootBrah
they call me Don Taters
NYM
<3 Miami Dolphins
WE GONNA WIN THE FUKING SUPERBOWL SOON BAYBEH
Hala Madrid
££££££sports betting crew££££££
This is all OJ's fault
Ass cheeks are the titties of the ass
First I romance the pie maker, then I romance the pie
post 1616901631 09-18-2020, 12:03 PM
-
#8
  1. Preban_AR15
  2. 922r compliant
  1. Preban_AR15
  2. 922r compliant
  3. Join Date: Aug 2009
  4. Location: Houston, Texas, United States
  5. Age: 47
  6. Posts: 10,084
  7. Rep Power: 100771
Originally Posted By Ironmanlet⏩
So what about my join date? Lol.

I have never talked to a pastor about preparing for marriage, so that was an ignorant assumption. I’m glad you pointed that out to me
Negged - I was just joking about having the same join date as me.
Oh and yea, move in together first. We lived together about 1.5 years before we got engaged.
⌨Miscing While Working яєω⌨
☆☆☆MISC Firearms яєω☆☆☆
⌨Neg Anti Hover Threads яєω⌨
post 1616902401 09-18-2020, 12:09 PM
-
#9
  1. jeshelton
  2. Registered User
  1. jeshelton
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Jan 2013
  4. Age: 43
  5. Posts: 11,801
  6. Rep Power: 267554
You could speak with a CPA about your current assets/liabilities, portfolio, and employment to better align your decisions as a couple?
445/340/545
post 1616903551 09-18-2020, 12:21 PM
-
#10
  1. Ratfish
  1. Ratfish
  3. Join Date: Jul 2009
  4. Location: Portland, Oregon, United States
  5. Posts: 113,850
  6. Rep Power: 576095
if a gal wants to get married, just tell her you want a religious-only ceremony under the watchful gaze of God, but that you are opposed to having the state meddle in any more of your life than they already are, so there won't be a marriage certificate

her response will tell you everything you need to know about her
Make Europe Germany Again
post 1616903931 09-18-2020, 12:24 PM
-
#11
  1. KathleenRyan
  2. lol
  1. KathleenRyan
  2. lol
  3. Join Date: Jun 2017
  4. Posts: 4,576
  5. Rep Power: 33569
Find out if she's down to take it up the booty
drvillain PM's mods to do his bidding - CONFIRMED.
post 1616903971 09-18-2020, 12:25 PM
-
#12
  1. headturner1
  2. User title
  1. headturner1
  2. User title
  3. Join Date: Jan 2012
  4. Location: Washington, United States
  5. Age: 18
  6. Height: 6'5"
  7. Weight: 282 lbs
  8. Posts: 22,831
  9. Subscribers: 9
  10. Rep Power: 318078
Jfl
post 1616905381 09-18-2020, 12:39 PM
-
#13
  1. Fozzy13
  2. unregistered user
  1. Fozzy13
  2. unregistered user
  3. Join Date: Jan 2007
  4. Posts: 38,659
  5. Rep Power: 41514
Pre marriage counseling...i would take a course that is the most detailed and lengthy.
n4l
Rayaarito
fappin
r32gojirra
post 1616905741 09-18-2020, 12:42 PM
-
#14
  1. BigTimeOperator
  1. BigTimeOperator
  3. Join Date: Jul 2017
  4. Posts: 13,368
  5. Subscribers: 1
  6. Rep Power: 113717
+1 on no state marriage license. A promise before God is all you need, depending on what your beliefs are.
post 1616906911 09-18-2020, 12:54 PM
-
#15
  1. 78novacaine
  2. Registered User
  1. 78novacaine
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Jan 2019
  4. Posts: 15,477
  5. Rep Power: 176552
Originally Posted By Ironmanlet⏩
That makes sense. I appreciate the thoughtful response. I wasn’t really asking about the ceremony itself, but I guess that is a big part of it. I mean, for the girl, right? That is hers. Not ours.

We got married at a church my family established >150 years ago, and had the reception on my family property a few miles down the road, so it was actually pretty much exactly as I wanted it TBH. I handled all the major logistics, she took care of all the detail work.

You and your wife talk about things like kids before hand?

Absolutely, and imo that is the only thing finances fall second place to in terms of compatibility. We both want 1-2 kids, and both 100% agree on a timeline for that. As far as finances go we have minor disagreements like anyone but never on anything major.

I envision a very detailed plan (only to deviate from lol). Almost like a strategy, but with room for flexibility.

More like a general outline/rough draft, but the big topics certainly must line up prior to marriage.

You talk about things like dealing with obnoxious in laws before hand?

Well my dad lives 3 hours away with his wife, but we all get along great, and her mom pretty much keeps to herself and lets us live our lives. Neither of us really has any immediate family besides those two that we interact with on a more than occasional basis, so in-laws are basically a non-factor in our marriage.
Answers in bold brah.
Permabulk/bloatlord Crew
Tradie Crew
HTC
post 1616942991 09-18-2020, 07:05 PM
-
#16
  1. Ironmanlet
  2. Adamantium User
  1. Ironmanlet
  2. Adamantium User
  3. Join Date: Aug 2009
  4. Location: Cajun Country
  5. Age: 40
  6. Height: 5'7"
  7. Weight: 185 lbs
  8. Posts: 52,304
  9. Subscribers: 4
  10. Rep Power: 415534
Originally Posted By jeshelton⏩
You could speak with a CPA about your current assets/liabilities, portfolio, and employment to better align your decisions as a couple?
This seems a little extreme, but I could see how it could be beneficial.
“The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood. Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.“

PS: Don't eat poop, just don't let the idea of it stop you from living life to its fullest.
Quick Navigation Top Misc
Bookmarks
Digg.com
Digg
del.icio.us
del.icio.us
Stumbleupon.com
StumbleUpon
Google.com
Google
Facebook.com
Facebook
Posting Permissions
  1. You may not post new threads
  2. You may not post replies
  3. You may not post attachments
  4. You may not edit your posts