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What is the key to an actually happy marriage? Does it exist?
03-29-2021, 02:20 AM
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#1
What is the key to an actually happy marriage? Does it exist?
I don't want any hollywood bull**** in this thread. Only IRL marriages you've actually witnessed where a couple has been married for many years, has kids and his wife still respects him, they still have fun together, still in love, still gets regular enthusiastic BJs etc.
What is the secret, if it exists
What is the secret, if it exists
03-30-2021, 09:46 PM
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#2
03-30-2021, 09:48 PM
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#3
03-30-2021, 09:52 PM
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#4
- lllEZRAlll
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- lllEZRAlll
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In my circles I'd say the key component is individualism. They have their own lives, rely on themselves, have their own goals hobbies and friends ect.
The worst ones are the co dependent types. Absolutely miserable
And even before that comes principles values belief systems ect. They must have similarities
The worst ones are the co dependent types. Absolutely miserable
And even before that comes principles values belief systems ect. They must have similarities
Wraith
03-30-2021, 09:53 PM
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#5
- jackflag
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Square footage.
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03-31-2021, 04:38 AM
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#6
Originally Posted By lllEZRAlll⏩
Yeah co dependance is definitely cancerous in a long term relationship. I didn't know this in my last relationship, thought it might even be a good thing, but I thought wrongIn my circles I'd say the key component is individualism. They have their own lives, rely on themselves, have their own goals hobbies and friends ect.
The worst ones are the co dependent types. Absolutely miserable
And even before that comes principles values belief systems ect. They must have similarities
The worst ones are the co dependent types. Absolutely miserable
And even before that comes principles values belief systems ect. They must have similarities
03-31-2021, 04:45 AM
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#7
- Chris_1990
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Easier said than done but don't marry the wrong person.
03-31-2021, 05:03 AM
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#8
03-31-2021, 05:17 AM
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#9
03-31-2021, 05:18 AM
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#10
- jackamo2887
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Don't marry a trash woman. Make sure her parents are good people. She has to have a good high paying job and be independent. Not a sloot
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03-31-2021, 05:21 AM
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#11
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The foundation of the relationship needs to be based on friendship and not lust. Too many guys meet their woman at a bar and bc she’s so hot want to marry her. Find a woman that is your best friend. With good morals. Barely drinks. That you love to fuk. This is the key
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03-31-2021, 05:30 AM
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#12
- SillieBazzillie
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Originally Posted By CalmYerSwag⏩
This is the answer right here. The chick you actually enjoy and look forward to spending time with. Similar interests, a sense of humor and the one who looks at you like you're her world.The foundation of the relationship needs to be based on friendship and not lust. Too many guys meet their woman at a bar and bc she’s so hot want to marry her. Find a woman that is your best friend. With good morals. Barely drinks. That you love to fuk. This is the key
Definitely nothing to do with whatever god you happen to believe in.
Plus you have to be a realist and understand that the first year of banging 10x a week will eventually subside down to a more normal couple times a week, but her personality won't change much and that's what makes her different than all other chicks.
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03-31-2021, 05:35 AM
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#13
- Kev1972
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The key to a successful relationship is never get married.
You lose all your power when you can't just walk away with your finances intact.
You lose all your power when you can't just walk away with your finances intact.
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03-31-2021, 05:40 AM
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#14
- memcop
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Originally Posted By moosik85⏩
This is probably the most sound advice itt so far. Women will try to transform you into a doormat. Up to you to become one.Don’t change
Despite her nagging, hen pecking and best attempts at doing so. Don’t become the beta she thinks she wants
Despite her nagging, hen pecking and best attempts at doing so. Don’t become the beta she thinks she wants
It's their nature. I've seen so many relationships dissolve because men refused to fight back and just cave.
Keep the balance. You're a man. Act like it.
Homerotic Modulator, Envious of Idiocy
03-31-2021, 06:00 AM
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#15
Studies say
1. Don't be mean (is more important than being kind)
2. Have psycholical flexibility
Confirmed by science. On phone so not gonna bother finding articles but search for it. Unfortunately most miscers are rigid as fuk in their way of thinking so jakes on them
1. Don't be mean (is more important than being kind)
2. Have psycholical flexibility
Confirmed by science. On phone so not gonna bother finding articles but search for it. Unfortunately most miscers are rigid as fuk in their way of thinking so jakes on them
03-31-2021, 06:06 AM
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#16
- clive
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Originally Posted By fuaAAA⏩
Happily married for 34 years, two grown up kids, life is fantastic! it does happen if you find the right person.I don't want any hollywood bull**** in this thread. Only IRL marriages you've actually witnessed where a couple has been married for many years, has kids and his wife still respects him, they still have fun together, still in love, still gets regular enthusiastic BJs etc.
What is the secret, if it exists
What is the secret, if it exists
Tennis balls?...........my Biceps are as big as Grapefruits!
03-31-2021, 06:08 AM
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#17
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The key to happiness is being single.
03-31-2021, 06:15 AM
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#18
- clive
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Originally Posted By Noahbro⏩
I don't go with this at all, I've never been religious and have a strong marriage, we are equals. Christianity is very biased towards men and women being subservient, I cant believe in that for a start!Having God in the center of your relationship srs.
Tennis balls?...........my Biceps are as big as Grapefruits!
03-31-2021, 06:27 AM
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#19
- LizzieTish
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Originally Posted By fuaAAA⏩
1 Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman.I don't want any hollywood bull**** in this thread. Only IRL marriages you've actually witnessed where a couple has been married for many years, has kids and his wife still respects him, they still have fun together, still in love, still gets regular enthusiastic BJs etc.
What is the secret, if it exists
What is the secret, if it exists
2 Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.
3 Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.
4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.
5 Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
6 But I speak this by permission, and not of commandment.
1 Corinthians Chapter 1-7 KJV
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18 Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth.
19 Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.
20 And why wilt thou, my son, be ravished with a strange woman, and embrace the bosom of a stranger?
21 For the ways of man are before the eyes of the LORD, and he pondereth all his goings.
22 His own iniquities shall take the wicked himself, and he shall be holden with the cords of his sins.
23 He shall die without instruction; and in the greatness of his folly he shall go astray.
Proverbs Chapter 5 18-23 KJV
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03-31-2021, 06:31 AM
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#20
03-31-2021, 06:45 AM
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#21
- bryan324
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Been married for going on 4 years, I know not the longest but the things that help us is that when things get tense we know well enough to let each other be, we simply don't argue. We also aren't attached at the hip, we obviously have a shared group of friends, but we also each kept our friends groups from pre-marriage and do seprate things from time to time, and we don't judge each others hobbies. She still goes to broadway shows, and to girls days at the spa and mall, etc. I still build cars, go shooting, and keep season tickets to the Dolphins, and aside from her occasional trip to the gun range, we don't do any of those things together, but respect eachothers separate interests.
The biggest thing I think though, is that we don't air out our lives on social media so there isn't hundreds of other people involved in every aspect of our lives. This ruins so many relationships because at the first sign of a problem you have fukin vultures trying to console your wife, to clap dem cheeks. Then the peanut gallery on both sides just comment making chit worse. Social media is probably one of the biggest problems with modern relationships.
The biggest thing I think though, is that we don't air out our lives on social media so there isn't hundreds of other people involved in every aspect of our lives. This ruins so many relationships because at the first sign of a problem you have fukin vultures trying to console your wife, to clap dem cheeks. Then the peanut gallery on both sides just comment making chit worse. Social media is probably one of the biggest problems with modern relationships.
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03-31-2021, 07:12 AM
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#22
- Bluestar92
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You get to pick who you get married to. If you **** that up then oh well. Some people aren’t meant to be in relationships and that’s fine. People make really bad decisions too.
03-31-2021, 07:24 AM
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#23
- Duckliver
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- Duckliver
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Originally Posted By Kev1972⏩
Not really at some point you have enough money you really don’t give a chit.The key to a successful relationship is never get married.
You lose all your power when you can't just walk away with your finances intact.
You lose all your power when you can't just walk away with your finances intact.
Also per op,
For my marriage which I’m going on 10 years this year and been together 15 with our third kid on the way. There was multiple things to bring back balance. At a point now where me and the wife just don’t fight at all. We can calmly talk things through cuz we’ve been through so much it’s not worth the effort to yell etc, and we care more about the kids and each other even if we are pissed off.
But it didn’t use to be like that. You need to be able to talk about what’s bothering you without the other person being defensive. You need to be open to hear what the other persons perspective is.
You can’t have a selfish mindset. Relationship isn’t 50/50. If you have that mindset you will always be thinking “well fuk you I did xyz , you need to do abc”. If both people are willing to give the effort in running the household and giving 100%, then you don’t worry about what the other person accomplishes. You recognize they are doing everything they can.
If you have needs, be frank and open with them. Work out a solution and don’t keep it to yourself. It’s a two way street though, if you both aren’t in the same page with it, the other person needs to go.
03-31-2021, 07:28 AM
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#24
- meanstringbean
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Alpha husband who doesnt break frame srs. The second you start opening up to your wife about every little problem, the second you start feeling comfortable in the relationship so skip the gym the next day and have that extra scoop of ice cream, the second you start telling her all the time how special she is/you dont deserve her/etc. is the second everything begins to end
03-31-2021, 07:30 AM
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#25
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More then 1 wife
03-31-2021, 07:52 AM
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#26
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Been married 22 years. Gotta actually be friends and like each other beyond just physical attraction. Ask yourself if you'd still want to be with her if your dink fell off or she got horribly disfigured in a fire. Long marriages are a slow burn and you're gonna go through some chit so only the strongest bonds survive it.
03-31-2021, 08:03 AM
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#27
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Traditional roles
03-31-2021, 08:06 AM
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#28
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Originally Posted By fuaAAA⏩
They both still go out and do their own thing like when they were single and then come together for kids and family time. My friend is like the only one out of 5 where I can say this.I don't want any hollywood bull**** in this thread. Only IRL marriages you've actually witnessed where a couple has been married for many years, has kids and his wife still respects him, they still have fun together, still in love, still gets regular enthusiastic BJs etc.
What is the secret, if it exists
What is the secret, if it exists
There is an unspoken thing, we are iron brothers and sisters, we are to support each other and...It is our duty to support our brothers and sisters in the iron game!
03-31-2021, 08:07 AM
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#29
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Don’t have kids
Try to continue growing as people together. Whether that’s traveling, learning, new hobbies etc
Try to continue growing as people together. Whether that’s traveling, learning, new hobbies etc
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03-31-2021, 08:11 AM
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#30
- RonaldMcflurry
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Originally Posted By clive⏩
You are older and in the UK. What worked for you will definitely NOT work with these new girls in the United States. I guarantee it.I don't go with this at all, I've never been religious and have a strong marriage, we are equals. Christianity is very biased towards men and women being subservient, I cant believe in that for a start!
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