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» Teen who was relentlessly bullied kills herself in front of her family
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post 1473390871 12-01-2016, 05:08 PM
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I got bullied a lot as a skinny ******* who didn't lift and was socially awkward and I didn't kill myself. To be quite honest, I'm still a skinny *******, not quite as socially awkward, and undoubtedly more sure of himself, but I understand the hurt of not fitting in. It's no reason to go and hurt yourself though. You go and do you until you find yourself. It happens to everybody at different times. I didn't understand who I really was until my late 20's. This is a tragedy, but people need to learn how to cope.
post 1473390911 12-01-2016, 05:08 PM
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Originally Posted By Avalanche3319
I'm guessing she had some sort of, probably undiagnosed, mental illness. Someone who was totally healthy upstairs probably wouldn't have offed themselves like this. It's a shame so many forms of mental illness are still so misunderstood and under recognized.
I don't think its necessary to be mentally ill to be suicidal. anyone who's ever had thoughts like these will tell you that it's not that you don't want to live, it's that you just want the pain to end because it's unbearable. if you don't have a support system in place and if you don't see any other solution to ending the pain, that's when you consider it.
someone here said that she could have just lost the weight. but the problem with bullies is they'll ALWYAS find something to pick on. and also, once your confidence is so damaged you believe you are literally worth nothing, you don't think in terms of improving yourself and that it'll fix anything. you start to think you're "unfixable" and that noone will care and that the world is going to be a better place without you in it.

when you only feel pain for months on end and don't believe itll EVER end, no matter what you do, it just becomes too much to take.
post 1473391581 12-01-2016, 05:14 PM
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She obvioulsy had other issues (she used a gun) far beyond just being bullied.
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post 1473391821 12-01-2016, 05:15 PM
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It's difficult for me to feel bad about an 18 year old being bulled. By that age you should be in "**** you" mode at the bare minimum.

I also wonder how certain people end up getting bullied. I was a fat kid all the way through high school and not once got bullied about my weight. I got along with almost everybody and never had a problem. Was I just lucky?
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post 1473392101 12-01-2016, 05:17 PM
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So she thought killing herself was a more sensible option then deleting ********. Woman logic.
post 1473392241 12-01-2016, 05:18 PM
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post 1473392491 12-01-2016, 05:20 PM
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Maybe I'm alone here but seems to me this chick had a mental disorder and was incredibly selfish.

Anyone who thinks suicide is the answer clearly has something wrong with them. But to do it in front of her family as well???

I'm sure her bullying as bad(kids can be insanely cruel) but her actions are just as bad...Killing yourself infront of your family while they beg you not to??? Wtf???
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post 1473392531 12-01-2016, 05:21 PM
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Anyone who is considering suicide, have a look on google or bestgore or whatever for fatal gunshot wounds. Will change your mind for life.
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post 1473392551 12-01-2016, 05:21 PM
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Originally Posted By NotBigEnough206
Raising a 12 year old girl brahs.
I swear to you, raising females is the worst thing in the world, the hardest.
Good god man, the chit they say to each other, little girls, its incredible.
They make little clicks, they talk bad about each other, manipulate each other.
Unbeliveable how women can be.
Especially nowadays with social media, she shows me snapchats of her friends, imagine a 12 year old saying things like choke me baby, or lewd sexual innunedos showing on their social media. Just unbeliveable.

My question is, where was the family, I dont want to judge, but where were they?
How do you combat it? Do you just tell her to ignore the other girls? Beat the **** out of them? Talk more **** than them?
Ive never been bullied, so i have no idea wtf you even do in a situation like that except to fight back.
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post 1473392941 12-01-2016, 05:24 PM
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Originally Posted By majszownik
I was wondering about this and Ive come to the conclusion he mightnot be saying that to her, but rather saying it sarcastically to the people who did this to her. either way, i think he's just numb from the pain and is trying so hard not to let the emotions crush him, that he's resorted to now showing any. he's probably repressing how he feels.
This, I thought that was very obvious.. you think he's saying that to his recently deceased sister? wtf.
post 1473393021 12-01-2016, 05:24 PM
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Originally Posted By MusicProducer
It's difficult for me to feel bad about an 18 year old being bulled. By that age you should be in "**** you" mode at the bare minimum.

I also wonder how certain people end up getting bullied.I was a fat kid all the way through high school and not once got bullied about my weight.I got along with almost everybody and never had a problem. Was I just lucky?
I find that hard to believe. Its more likely you were oblivious and didn't recognize it. In any event, if you made it through unscathed, that was probably a good thing.
Originally Posted By BenchWellington
Maybe I'm alone here but seems to me this chick had a mental disorder and was incredibly selfish.

Anyone who thinks suicide is the answer clearly has something wrong with them. But to do it in front of her family as well???

I'm sure her bullying as bad(kids can be insanely cruel) but her actions are just as bad...Killing yourself infront of your family while they beg you not to??? Wtf???
Which is why I say she had other issues.
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post 1473393251 12-01-2016, 05:26 PM
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Originally Posted By MusicProducer
It's difficult for me to feel bad about an 18 year old being bulled. By that age you should be in "**** you" mode at the bare minimum.

I also wonder how certain people end up getting bullied. I was a fat kid all the way through high school and not once got bullied about my weight. I got along with almost everybody and never had a problem. Was I just lucky?
Probably it also sounds like her bullying was strictly social media based. She Wouldn't have heard (seen) any of it if she got of the internet. I will never understand cyber bullying. People are horrible and don't know how they can affect someone but if someone is harassing you online just log the **** off. It's like teens these days dont know how to get off the internet or delete their social media. I'm not trying to victim blame but they obviously were not stopping and its up to you to do something about it. She went so far as to the police and her family but never though once to just delete the damn thing.

Maybe its because I was in high school just at the start of social media but I just dont understand it. I had a bully in high school who tormented me every chance she saw me. Remember going to my principal about it and she literally said "not every one is going to like you". Basically telling me to get over it and move on. Definitely went into IDGAF mode after that. Had a few other bitches try to bully me after that and completely went off on them and they stopped. But I could never do it to my first bully she was vicious and I could not stand up to her. Was so glad when I graduated and never had to see her again. But the think about being bullied face to face was I got to go home everyday and not deal with it.

I'm rambling but I just find cyber bullying bizarre when you can just turn the computer off and its gone.
post 1473393441 12-01-2016, 05:28 PM
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Originally Posted By PotatoLane
2-3x as many girls are on anti depressants than men, and they attempt suicide more often. Men are just more likely to be successful in their attempt so they have a higher 'rate'.
girls get depressed from the most utter stupid chit like breaking up with a boyfriend

girls are spoiled rotten in this day and age, just look at social media

if you took away their validation alone they wouldn't be able to handle it, let alone the bullchit men have to put up with

like i said female suicides would be off the charts
post 1473393761 12-01-2016, 05:30 PM
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Why are young people even on ********?

Like, where are the parents? (srs)

I'd never allow my kids to be part of the cesspool of social media.
post 1473393921 12-01-2016, 05:32 PM
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Originally Posted By MusicProducer
It's difficult for me to feel bad about an 18 year old being bulled. By that age you should be in "**** you" mode at the bare minimum.

I also wonder how certain people end up getting bullied. I was a fat kid all the way through high school and not once got bullied about my weight. I got along with almost everybody and never had a problem. Was I just lucky?
You sound like you went to school before the social media era.

Kids can now harass each other 24/7, anonymously. It's much different than being limited to face to face verbal bullying.
post 1473394021 12-01-2016, 05:33 PM
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Originally Posted By FlexLex
I understand mental illness and depression are extremely serious things, but assuming pity is a finite feeling, I really do not have much for these people. Yes getting bullied, even physically assaulted is a horrible thing that no one should have to go through. But compared to actual horrendous experiences in life: starvation, serious physical abuse and violence, terminal illnesses, lifelong disabilities, losses of spouses or kids, etc. Ending your life over bullying and subjecting your loved ones to years of hell and sorrow really is unforgivable imo
This is exactly the wrong kind of attitude to have towards bullying. With the growing knowledge that we have on brain plasticity, brain chemistry, gene expression and the impact that words can have on them we need to take bullying far more seriously. Words and the thoughts they invoke have literal PHYSICAL ramifications on the geography of the brain, how it develops (and she was only 18) and impact dopamine receptors and the habituated thought patterns that can govern what elicits powerful, chemical responses in someone's brain.

Words are not "free lunch". They have tangible, measurable and observable impacts on the brain and its chemistry. People need to acknowledge and treat bullies more severely. Dead ****ing serious.
Originally Posted By MusicProducer
It's difficult for me to feel bad about an 18 year old being bulled. By that age you should be in "**** you" mode at the bare minimum.

I also wonder how certain people end up getting bullied. I was a fat kid all the way through high school and not once got bullied about my weight. I got along with almost everybody and never had a problem. Was I just lucky?
You were very lucky.
Originally Posted By KRANE
She obvioulsy had other issues (she used a gun) far beyond just being bullied.
This 100%.
The closer we approach the uncertainty of life's ending the more we wish to trade all of the things we have acquired in exchange for all of the things we have lost: wealth for youth, knowledge for fresh curiosity, resignation for hope. We'd trade our wisdom for new experiences, but it is wisdom that will teach us that at the end of the road the only new experience is death.
post 1473394391 12-01-2016, 05:35 PM
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u cant stop bullying cuz u cant change teenage girls

stop already. Tell kids to stop snitching and stop gaf

and get them the f off fb
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post 1473395511 12-01-2016, 05:43 PM
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Originally Posted By Redhotpengy
Anyone who is considering suicide, have a look on google or bestgore or whatever for fatal gunshot wounds. Will change your mind for life.
Seen all there is. Only difference now is if i ever did it id put a bag over my head beforehand so no one has to see the mess inside.
post 1473395801 12-01-2016, 05:44 PM
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I have mixed feelings about this.


I was severely bullied in HS to the point where i had to be pulled out of my classes and basically sheltered in a class room in the back of the school for the remaining months of the school year with different school hours, I got there after the main campus started and left before they got out so i can get a head start to get home. Never once did i want to kill myself over it. If i did that, They won, I lost.
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post 1473396181 12-01-2016, 05:47 PM
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I've never understood bullies. Like, how does making someone else feel like chit make you feel better about yourself? I just don't understand the thought process.
post 1473396271 12-01-2016, 05:48 PM
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Originally Posted By WSG1
I have mixed feelings about this.


I was severely bullied in HS to the point where i had to be pulled out of my classes and basically sheltered in a class room in the back of the school for the remaining months of the school year with different school hours, I got there after the main campus started and left before they got out so i can get a head start to get home. Never once did i want to kill myself over it. If i did that, They won, I lost.
I'd say most people get over bullying, but some find it hard to cope or recover. On an individual basis killing yourself is never the solution, but people as a whole have to consider that others might be going through **** in their lives and teasing/bullying makes a potential escape a hell instead.
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post 1473396361 12-01-2016, 05:49 PM
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Originally Posted By acetylcoa
what bothers me is the first few lines of the article

"brandy vela's bedroom is covered in post-it notes. "you will always own a piece of my heart," says one. "you will never be forgotten," says another."

where the **** were these people when she was alive???
exactly!
post 1473396531 12-01-2016, 05:50 PM
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Originally Posted By ItFitz
I've never understood bullies. Like, how does making someone else feel like chit make you feel better about yourself? I just don't understand the thought process.
Their brain chemistry is ****ed up. They've habituated certain behaviors to elicit a positive response in their brain. This is exactly what they achieve in their victims as well, habituating certain thoughts and behaviors to elicit certain responses that make the victim feel the opposite of what the bully experiences.

A sadist is a great example (in the extreme) of what this looks like. Most "normal" people don't elicit positive chemical response when inflicting pain or cruelty on others, which is what keeps them from behaving this way with any regularity. Everyone is capable of being sadistic but it is a minority that have habituated the behavior in such a way that they derive consistent pleasure from it. Usually they were victims of abuse themselves and it is this that influenced the development of their brain and what triggers the release of dopamine when inflicting harm on others.
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post 1473396701 12-01-2016, 05:52 PM
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Originally Posted By WSG1
I have mixed feelings about this.


I was severely bullied in HS to the point where i had to be pulled out of my classes and basically sheltered in a class room in the back of the school for the remaining months of the school year with different school hours, I got there after the main campus started and left before they got out so i can get a head start to get home. Never once did i want to kill myself over it. If i did that, They won, I lost.
nah bra thats a phuking L
post 1473396841 12-01-2016, 05:52 PM
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Originally Posted By WSG1
I have mixed feelings about this.


I was severely bullied in HS to the point where i had to be pulled out of my classes and basically sheltered in a class room in the back of the school for the remaining months of the school year with different school hours, I got there after the main campus started and left before they got out so i can get a head start to get home. Never once did i want to kill myself over it. If i did that, They won, I lost.
Mind if I ask what the led to the bullying and what it was generally about?
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post 1473396931 12-01-2016, 05:54 PM
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Originally Posted By MyGhettoFantasy
Their brain chemistry is ****ed up. They've habituated certain behaviors to elicit a positive response in their brain. This is exactly what they achieve in their victims as well, habituating certain thoughts and behaviors to elicit certain responses that make the victim feel the opposite of what the bully experiences.

A sadist is a great example (in the extreme) of what this looks like. Most "normal" people don't elicit positive chemical response when inflicting pain or cruelty on others, which is what keeps them from behaving this way with any regularity. Everyone is capable of being sadistic but it is a minority that have habituated the behavior in such a way tat they derive pleasure from it. Usually they were victims of abuse themselves and it is this that influenced the development of their brain and what triggers the release of dopamine.
yea this is the same time of mindset that leads to "cliques" and determining who's "cool" or not... ****ing stupid imo
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post 1473397171 12-01-2016, 05:55 PM
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She's bullied because shes fat and decides to fix this by shooting herself instead buying a gym membership?

Thats brutal, but jesus @ her thought process
post 1473397991 12-01-2016, 06:02 PM
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Originally Posted By AcetylCoA
yea this is the same time of mindset that leads to "cliques" and determining who's "cool" or not... ****ing stupid imo
It is, and it is a big mess.

A big part of the problem is the popularly held belief that "their just words, it's not physical abuse". it is physical abuse, though. From the original thought of the bully, to the sounds waves that convey that thought, to the ear that received it and the brain that interprets it everything is physical. Everything is measurable and has observable (via the appropriate instruments) ramifications for both the perpetrator and the victim. unfortunately people are incredibly shortsighted in that they cannot observe these things necessarily through their own senses alone so it is either hard to fathom or they don't bother to think about it much at all, until something tragic happens.
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post 1473398101 12-01-2016, 06:03 PM
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This type of emotional dysfunction isn't just limited to teenage girls. Read through the misc. Every other thread is a social media lament, and every thread has a bully in it. You just have to know how to recognize him.
Originally Posted By ItFitz
I've never understood bullies. Like, how doesmaking someone else feel like chit make you feel better about yourself?I just don't understand the thought process.
That's exactly what it does. You boost your esteem through the pain and misery of others. Its also used to lower the bar: Bringing them down to your level through ridicule, embarrassment, etc. and making fun of their achievements so as to justify your mediocrity. Even an cursory understanding shows a lot of psychology behind bullying.
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post 1473398391 12-01-2016, 06:05 PM
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