mirin that you were able to delay this feeling until 2023

I think what you're describing itt is not limited to our current era, it's something about men's spirit hardening over time to endure life. Take for example this 2.5k year old poem by Lao tzu:

"Men are born soft and supple; dead they are stiff and hard. Plants are born tender and pliant; dead, they are brittle and dry. Thus whoever is stiff and inflexible is a disciple of death. Whoever is soft and yielding is a disciple of life. The hard and stiff will be broken. The soft and supple will prevail"

It’s easy to see how that can happen when every year for the past three years has been the worst year of your life


That’s been my experience at least

what is there to be happy and optimistic about? sorry i cant laugh at the same re hashed memes.

my friend has a baby hes really happy and optimistic. but i all i can think is, if it gets worse his son will be a tranny

Thats life, no more
oppourtunities,,, no more
old people and friends family around.
its as if, take things serious...there are no
other chances,beside being introvert or inclosed on yourself
and not building networks other options around yourself

IT OVER

It hasn't collapsed, and some areas might do so over the next couple years if rates stay high. But deals have definitely slowed down with interest rates, and it's a weird market where people still have money(so the good deals still have multiple offers and people overpaying) but the sheer number of transactions is way down.

Because I'm somewhat of a "behind the scenes" hustler type who has a lot of big clients, I'll come out of this in really good shape and have a couple big years before the competition from other people picks back up. But this year has been awful so far and I've cut my expenses way back.

You waited too long. There aren't many good women without children left at your age. You can always go younger, but that brings it's own set of challenges.

I think you'll find that once you have a family to focus on, a lot of the clown world stuff just disappears from your vision. You'll have more important stuff to deal with than whatever bs is happening in the mainstream media.

get off the internet.

if you do, stop reading about news/ politics too much

get outside as much as you can

dont chase money, and dont waste it on dumb chit in the hope people are impressed

drink in moderation

find a good woman
































































last one is nearly impossible

My personality has changed heaps in the last 5 years or so as well.
Went from 25 years old, financially free, partying, banging girls ect.
Now have a mrs, stressful job, mortgage ect. Probably just overall a more serious personality (matured?).

I have a shorter fuse than I used to, probably at times less fun to be around. Wouldn't change it though I love my life, but my current circumstances have certainly altered my personality. But we can't be kids forever.

You need to become soft and supple again, ded fkn srs

I self reflect and realize that too from time to time. That I've become more serious, like hope/optimism/attitude/energy has swept away from me, if you were to compare a 2017 Visel fresh out of college to 2023 Visel... at least on most days.

The 3rd or 4th largest thing is an increase of responsibilities. I don't even have a wife/kid, and I'm saying that. I'm responsible for my own bills, accomplishing my own goals (and creating them in the first place), doing good enough to not get fired at work, choosing carefully the information I digest.

But the main things at play for this are:
- Facing harder times due to aging, either due to my own health (not the case), or my aging family.
- Society expecting mature behavior due to your age.
- Letting the genie out of the bottle regarding politics, social issues, women, censorship, and many other such issues.

The 2017-out-of-college Visel was literally singing all the time and pulling pranks and chit at my first job out of college with the coworkers, srs. Some people hated me, most people loved me, but I felt like a beacon of charisma. In hindsight I was probably annoying to most people lol, but I felt appreciated nonetheless.

The 2023-out-of-college Visel keeps to himself, rarely jokes, drinks to cope, has anxiety about work performance. Pretty much unrecognizable most of the time.

When I have these realizations, I remind myself that this is all just a mindset and attitude switch. I can still sing, interpret things more comedically, obsess over dumb but fun chit. Just takes breaking out of a cycle/loop, after you've acknowledged you're going through one to begin with. It helps to associate with positive people, to do fun chit, to look forward to fun things, avoid or focus less on negative chit, solely ingest positivity whenever possible... but also to do positive things that are within your control in the form of accomplishments and self improving (exercise, study, eat clean, drink less, etc.).

I think everyone just gets a little crazier as they age

Actually the opposite for me. I take life less seriously the older I get. You eventually stop giving a fuk about most things, including the chit that used to stress you out.

Also being more self aware and knowing what makes you tick, what your coping mechanisms are, makes getting thru life alot easier.

Sounds like a part of getting older brah

Also a natural response to clown world

Sometimes we all get in a funk. Also, I feel like mid 30s guys your perspective on the world and people seems to change. All that you've lived in your 20s, plus the wisdom as you get older... me personally I'm a lot less willing to give a **** for people I used to. As I'm older, I see some chitty people for who they really are, and good hearted people stand out more, because now I've got enough experience to see through bull****, and see how rare they are. Maybe you're just taking the red pill in the matrix. Maybe you got to unfunk the funk. Don't want to derail the thread but how the pec?

Also, In my 30s, I think my ovaries started kicking in and once I had my own lil mini me, I felt like the puzzle pieces of life all started to fit

Edit: also, meant to add that having a kid gave me purpose. And that purpose is to make sure he don't end up a tranny and cut off his dink.

gonna use this thought with this older woman I'm trying to DM

I think this happened to most people on earth honestly. The world was so different before 2012 and before the economy was fking trash for the average person and relationships between men and women were ruined etc

Stop giving so much fcks op, if you learn to do that your smile will come back.

This.

BUT I will throw in a caveat that you have to be careful about whether your taking life less seriously stems from a healthy source.

Part of my psychological make-up (that I have be wary of) is that I tend to desire afreedom fromas opposed to afreedom FOR. Most people want freedom, but why? So you don't have the burden of struggles and responsibilities? Or so you can actually DO chit and PURSUE things with your life? These differences have implications.

"freedom from" signifies a withdrawing from life and it's various challenges, where as "freedom for" is suggestive of healthy striving and making the most of one's life.

To be fair,

The world has also changed. To a more internet based facade based bullchit

So it kinda makes sense.

Prior you were actually about said connections now its about looking like said connections- getting clicks, getting likes, getting views - even if there's no substance behind what you're saying

And tbh most people are drinking the typical kool aid, so that also makes sense

Keep in mind, iq distribution has most people as avg. Most people are "c" students. So if you think about popularity - majority - then popularity is about "c" quality

I remember when tech was burgeoning, people totally predicting that face to face quality connections were going to deteriorate. Even though the tech made us "closer" it actually made us further apart

Yo same bro. I was always the life of the party but my sense of humor fading & losing that narcissist mindset of worshiping myself. I used to think im the chit, for real.
I think its because i moved away from my social circle i had built for my whole life. Had to start over many times, be a nobody again.

Pretty much exact same scenario as me OP

I’m miserable as fukk to be around but used to be light hearted and fun

I think its a cycle

When you’re younger you have less responsibilities and just need to navigate social interactions

When you’re a young adult you have your whole life ahead of you not too weighed down with responsibilities l

When you hit late 20s to mid 30s the world starts weighing you down some past experiences you harp on and get more jaded

Not sure what happens when you hit 40-50s

But I see the older generation 60+ start to not give a fuk and the majority seem happy af

But its all generational…if you put somebody that is 60+ back to their 30s in today’s climate would they be happy and vice verse….put a 30 year old to when the 60 year old was 30…would they be happy?

You don't use it, you lose it.

Simple as that.

When I was younger and shy, I decided to make a change, I listened to talk radio/podcast all the time, I wrote down jokes, I approached people all the time, I was a presence to be around. I felt great. Got laid with hottest women I've ever been with. That was enough for me. I don't need to chase it anymore. I achieved what I wanted. To become someone who people wanted to be around. But if you don't use it, you lose it.

Like the swaying/doubt of the identity caused by comparison is whats causing this.
Happiest times i had was when i had a CLEAR plan i was going to execute, and i was happy with the plan & the outcome. After turning 20 or so it started swaying all over the place, what i want to be and chit. I felt dissatisfied with my plans, because of said comparison.

This. You gotta work on being positive, its constant effort. Its easy to become bitter and jaded from what life throws at you, but it takes some effort to rise above it

i started lurking misc in 2007. ive been pretty dark on everything ever since tbh

Age has done it to me.

came in to say this