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Forum » Breaking news: Jonathan the Tortoise has passed away at 193 years old
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Thread: Breaking news: Jonathan the Tortoise has passed away at 193 years old

post 10000108834 04-01-2026, 03:42 PM
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#1
  1. Babayagawick85
  1. Babayagawick85
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Breaking news: Jonathan the Tortoise has passed away at 193 years old

That is incredible how long he lived .

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2026/04/01/jonathan-oldest-tortoise-dies-st-helena/89424376007/

The amount of people that have taken care of him must have been astronomical
post 10000108835 04-01-2026, 03:46 PM
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#2
  1. Jaydubs
  2. Former Misc Jasonw1178
  1. Jaydubs
  2. Former Misc Jasonw1178
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He had a good (slow) run.
post 10000108836 04-01-2026, 03:46 PM
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#3
  1. gwg77
  1. gwg77
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Bet he got laid a lot too. 193 years of laying turtle pipe. Mirin.


post 10000108843 04-01-2026, 03:53 PM
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#4
  1. Orsonswells
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He got tired of living in clown world
post 10000108846 04-01-2026, 03:54 PM
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#5
  1. BolognaNbeans
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Baba this is not the news we want ok
post 10000108855 04-01-2026, 03:59 PM
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#6
  1. Bonobo
  2. Autist Whisperer
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It was for the better. He was a shell of his former self.
El Bonobo
Incel crusher
post 10000108857 04-01-2026, 04:01 PM
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#7
  1. John L
  2. Make that coffee to go
  1. John L
  2. Make that coffee to go
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He was a kid
post 10000108858 04-01-2026, 04:02 PM
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#8
  1. Bonobo
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  1. Bonobo
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Originally Posted By John
He was a kid
It's sad when they go young like that.
El Bonobo
Incel crusher
post 10000108913 04-01-2026, 04:48 PM
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#9
  1. anonkunbrah
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Originally Posted By Bonobo⏩
It's sad when they go young like that.
WHEN THEY GO??? Cmon huh.
post 10000108918 04-01-2026, 04:52 PM
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#10
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Surely this means that WW3 is imminent
post 10000108960 04-01-2026, 05:33 PM
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#11
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They only estimated his age

We just know he was grown in 1882
gay rep trade crew:

lil pete
mulloway69
n0rds
p7nk
gwg77
post 10000108994 04-01-2026, 06:01 PM
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#12
  1. DrugsToGetBig
  2. So it begins
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he's literally still alive..
*Forever Alone Crew*
*Neg FireofAss Crew on SIGHT Crew*
post 10000109006 04-01-2026, 06:08 PM
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#13
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Originally Posted By Babayagawick85⏩
That is incredible how long he lived .

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2026/04/01/jonathan-oldest-tortoise-dies-st-helena/89424376007/

The amount of people that have taken care of him must have been astronomical
“Islam to a man is like rabies to a dog”-Churchill
"I was repelled by the conglomeration of races which the capital showed me, repelled by this whole mixture of Czechs, Poles, Hungarians, Ruthenians, Serbs, and Croats, and everywhere, the eternal mushroom of humanity Jews and more Jews."-Hitler
post 10000109050 04-01-2026, 06:57 PM
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#14
  1. ConTroLFreaKK
  2. Soon...
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Literally the first paragraph in the article

"Corrections & clarifications: A previous version of this story incorrectly reported that Jonathan the tortoise had died.Despite claims of his death spreading on social media, the world's oldest known land animal, a giant tortoise named Jonathan, remained alive and well on Wednesday, April 1, the reptile's caretaker said.An account on the social media platform X, purporting to be Jonathan's veterinarian Joe Hollins, posted an announcement that the animal had died at age 193.But Jonathan has not died and the account is a fake, the real Joe Hollins told USA TODAY."Jonathan the tortoise is very much alive," Hollins said. "I believe on X the person purporting to be me is asking for crypto donations, so it’s not even an April Fool joke. It’s a con."
++ Always take shirt off before taking a chit crew ++
++ Balcony brah supporter crew ++
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++ Positivity crew ++
post 10000109064 04-01-2026, 07:03 PM
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#15
  1. kimm4
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Originally Posted By gwg77⏩
Bet he got laid a lot too. 193 years of laying turtle pipe. Mirin.



Had more action compared to most miscers...nice!

Edit: Just read he's still living cool...but my post still stands. :)
National Level Competitor (Female BB)
post 10000109069 04-01-2026, 07:08 PM
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#16
  1. gwg77
  1. gwg77
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Originally Posted By kimm4⏩
Had more action compared to most miscers...nice!

Edit: Just read he's still living cool...but my post still stands. :)
Guaranteed he's still laying turtle pipe too

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