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Forum » Fight with wife--wrecked wardrobe--too far?? (PIC)
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Thread: Fight with wife--wrecked wardrobe--too far?? (PIC)

post 1445954323 06-05-2016, 01:23 AM
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OP I can relate, I used to have an explosive temper as well. I've punched, kicked and thrown so many inanimate objects over the years, walls, doors, turned over tables, thrown a knife at a wall, smashed a chair over a table, punched a computer screen, you name it I've punched, kicked or thrown it.

But now I'm the most chilled guy you'd ever meet, rarely lose my temper and when I do, I don't break anything like I used to. If what you did was an isolated incident that's fine, anyone can be driven to the brink, but if it's a regular occurrence you need to find out why you lose your temper so easily. For me in was control issues once I recognised this and found a way to direct my need for control I became a much nicer more stable person.
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post 1445954393 06-05-2016, 01:24 AM
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Originally Posted By Clickbait⏩
How the fuk do you let yourself do that? Get so mad you punch stuff? Get control of yourself dude and quit acting like a child throwing a tantrum
i agree 100%
post 1445954423 06-05-2016, 01:24 AM
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Just give her the full nelson painal
post 1445954493 06-05-2016, 01:24 AM
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Originally Posted By SuperMariBro⏩
I was working at the computer and SHE was the one screaming in MY ear. some how she flipped the whole thing around and was making me look like the culprit.
And you tried to talk some sense into her, but she refused to accept any rational argument, right? She was unable to admit any fault or accept even a shred of accountability, right?
post 1445954503 06-05-2016, 01:24 AM
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Originally Posted By SuperMariBro⏩
I was working at the computer and SHE was the one screaming in MY ear. some how she flipped the whole thing around and was making me look like the culprit.
hahah to be fair that does sound pretty typical of a woman lol... they're really good at playing the victim aren't they?

I mean I still wouldn't end up punching my walls though
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post 1445954613 06-05-2016, 01:26 AM
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Originally Posted By BrightonBomber⏩
OP I can relate, I used to have an explosive temper as well. I've punched, kicked and thrown so many inanimate objects over the years, walls, doors, turned over tables, thrown a knife at a wall, smashed a chair over a table, punched a computer screen, you name it I've punched, kicked or thrown it.

But now I'm the most chilled guy you'd ever meet, rarely lose my temper and when I do, I don't break anything like I used to. If what you did was an isolated incident that's fine, anyone can be driven to the brink, but if it's a regular occurrence you need to find out why you lose your temper so easily. For me in was control issues once I recognised this and found a way to direct my need for control I became a much nicer more stable person.
i dont know man. easy to type that chit out but applying it must be a different story altogether. im just afraid of where this ends up.
post 1445954813 06-05-2016, 01:28 AM
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lol stayed with her father from friday morning to saturday night

OK
post 1445954863 06-05-2016, 01:29 AM
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Originally Posted By DonaldBastard⏩
And you tried to talk some sense into her, but she refused to accept any rational argument, right? She was unable to admit any fault or accept even a shred of accountability, right?
she claimed i should have been the one contacting her and checking up on things...despite the fact i was at home and she was the one out doing whatever. came home saturday night (last night) and she was slightly boozed up. quiet this morning til she wanted to talk. i was not up for it. commenced screaming then the wardrobe incident.
post 1445954933 06-05-2016, 01:29 AM
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I have several friends who punch/smash things when they're angry. Obviously they aren't happy that they smashed something, after they've done it, but it's an uncontrollable reaction for them - which is understandable I suppose.

Thing is, I remember them at a time when it wasn't uncontrollable. So what happened? They decided at one point that "letting it out" when angry was good for you. I remember them saying it. So initially that meant talking about their feelings when angry - to let it all out - but then it escalated to yelling, then it escalated to tensing their body, to using exercise when angry, to using a punching bag (suggested above), to punching walls, etc. Now, whenever they're angry, they immediately skip all levels and just smash their important possessions uncontrollably.

My point is that "letting it out" is not good. Letting it out just teaches you how to let it out even more effectively, and it escalates.

It sounds like your gf made you angry for valid reasons. You're just dealing with it in the wrong way. Dump someone who affects your life in such a negative manner.
post 1445955053 06-05-2016, 01:30 AM
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Originally Posted By mcdojo⏩
lol stayed with her father from friday morning to saturday night

OK
exactly. if the shoe was on the other foot, oh lawd..the fuking drama that would ensue when i got home.

i have no doubt she stayed with him friday...we spoke. but all day saturday and then evening boozing somewhere was out of the ordinary.
post 1445955163 06-05-2016, 01:32 AM
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Originally Posted By HateyouOP⏩
I have several friends who punch/smash things when they're angry. Obviously they aren't happy that they smashed something, after they've done it, but it's an uncontrollable reaction for them - which is understandable I suppose.

Thing is, I remember them at a time when it wasn't uncontrollable. So what happened? They decided at one point that "letting it out" when angry was good for you. I remember them saying it. So initially that meant talking about their feelings when angry - to let it all out - but then it escalated to yelling, then it escalated to tensing their body, to using exercise when angry, to using a punching bag (suggested above), to punching walls, etc. Now, whenever they're angry, they immediately skip all levels and just smash their important possessions uncontrollably.

My point is that "letting it out" is not good. Letting it out just teaches you how to let it out even more effectively, and it escalates.

It sounds like your gf made you angry for valid reasons. You're just dealing with it in the wrong way. Dump someone who affects your life in such a negative manner.
thanks...but she isnt my gf. she is my wife.

if i dont let it out, prob worse to bottle it all up.
post 1445955433 06-05-2016, 01:35 AM
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OP..it is a bit too far.

I had anger like that before and after a few times of replacing my chit...I understood that the only one paying for this was me...and my money.

The anger shows you still care to a point.

I'm fighting with my Ball Buster right now...tonight as she is in our hair salon...

I have no anger because I'm caring about what shes bitching about less and less so its a true sign that our relationship is about over.

Stop feeling like a dick and stop destroying your own property by giving that woman in your life that much power.
post 1445955933 06-05-2016, 01:40 AM
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Originally Posted By exbuffstuff⏩
OP..it is a bit too far.

I had anger like that before and after a few times of replacing my chit...I understood that the only one paying for this was me...and my money.

The anger shows you still care to a point.

I'm fighting with my Ball Buster right now...tonight as she is in our hair salon...

I have no anger because I'm caring about what shes bitching about less and less so its a true sign that our relationship is about over.

Stop feeling like a dick and stop destroying your own property by giving that woman in your life that much power.
thanks man.
post 1445956053 06-05-2016, 01:41 AM
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Originally Posted By SuperMariBro⏩
thanks...but she isnt my gf. she is my wife.

if i dont let it out, prob worse to bottle it all up.
You're literally making me repeat my advice again. It is not worse to bottle it up, it is better to learn how to remain calm. When you let it out, you just get better at letting it out, which escalates to people going hulk mode at things that other people could stay calm over.

You don't have to believe my experience though, researchers have proven that letting it out just makes you more angry and does not work.

Here's an article about it:https://youarenotsosmart.com/2010/08/11/catharsis/(Summary: Venting increases aggressive behavior over time.)

Basically stop smashing stuff, and if your wife is making you angry for valid reasons, then work on the underlying problem instead of wallowing in anger.
post 1445956223 06-05-2016, 01:43 AM
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She deserves so much better than you. Please pm me her contact information so I can assure her as much.
post 1445956243 06-05-2016, 01:44 AM
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I did that with my ex gf in our old apartment but on a door.

She was going psycho as well but fortunately she broke her own things instead of mine or the apartment. She threw her iphone 5 at the wall a couple of times and smashed it all over the tiles.
post 1445956253 06-05-2016, 01:44 AM
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Originally Posted By SuperMariBro⏩
exactly.if the shoe was on the other foot, oh lawd..the fuking drama that would ensue when i got home.

i have no doubt she stayed with him friday...we spoke. but all day saturday and then evening boozing somewhere was out of the ordinary.
Do you understand that she wears the pants in the relationship? She knows this. You don't seem to be aware of it though. There's nothing you can do about her behavior. This will happen again. I guarantee it. At some point you'll become one of those men who apathetically mumble"Gotta pick your battles"like a little estro bitchboy. With time, you'll become a submissive, passive husband simply going through the motions of life. Your wife will trash you behind your back, flirt with other men, and constantly belittle you to your face. This is marriage. This is what you agreed to, fella.
post 1445956353 06-05-2016, 01:45 AM
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Originally Posted By HateyouOP⏩
You're literally making me repeat my advice again. It is not worse to bottle it up, it is better to learn how to remain calm. When you let it out, you just get better at letting it out, which escalates to people going hulk mode at things that other people could stay calm over.

You don't have to believe my experience though, researchers have proven that letting it out just makes you more angry and does not work.

Here's an article about it:https://youarenotsosmart.com/2010/08/11/catharsis/(Summary: Venting increases aggressive behavior over time.)

Basically stop smashing stuff, and if your wife is making you angry for valid reasons, then work on the underlying problem instead of wallowing in anger.
i know you are more than likely to be correct. but putting words into practice wont be easy.

anyway, im away out for a walk.

thanks misc.
post 1445956693 06-05-2016, 01:49 AM
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Hmm I punched a whole in the wall in my apartment after an angry outburst. So this is normal I'd say.
post 1445956743 06-05-2016, 01:49 AM
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Originally Posted By HateyouOP⏩
Basically stop smashing stuff, and if your wife is making you angry for valid reasons
In my experience it's extremely rare that a girl ever makes you angry for a valid reason. If I'm smashing chit it's out of frustration at the lack of valid reason and the retardation of the argument.
post 1445956863 06-05-2016, 01:51 AM
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its too far mane.

i can relate to your anger, but shes ur wife. i know it sounds ****gy, but your wife should feel secure around you and not be afraid.

i know this also sounds ****gy, but esp when dealing with ur wife/gf words are stronger than fists. relationships are made of honest talking about ur feelings. again i can really relate to your anger, but maybe its the time to see someone who knows how to deal with your anger (therapist, even priests can help)
post 1445956943 06-05-2016, 01:52 AM
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Not judging you since women are *******s and can overstep their boundaries fuking easily, but hopefully you don't live in a state where this is considered 'Violence against women', and hopefully you learn how to control your emotions with her. She won by pissing you off to that point, which is what she was trying to do, so next time she fuks you off just remind yourself that she's doing it intentionally and that giving in to her games is doing nowt for you and everything for her.
post 1445957143 06-05-2016, 01:55 AM
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Originally Posted By vordulmega⏩
In my experience it's extremely rare that a girl ever makes you angry for a valid reason. If I'm smashing chit it's out of frustration at the lack of valid reason and the retardation of the argument.
What I mean is that if you feel your anger is justified (e.g. that the argument is retarded) then deal with the thing which is causing the anger, i.e. the girl, rather than making yourself a more angry person. If she consistently makes you feel like chit then get rid of her. Practicing your jab-cross combos all day in Ikea will not help in the long term, even if it feels good in the short term.
post 1445957183 06-05-2016, 01:56 AM
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Pretty sure you're a ****ing adult, stop acting like a child. A man controls his emotions. Furthermore why would you damage your own property? Cro-Magnon
post 1445957253 06-05-2016, 01:57 AM
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Originally Posted By mc-girk⏩
Pretty sure you're a ****ing adult, stop acting like a child. A man controls his emotions. Furthermore why would you damage your own property? Cro-Magnon
Pretty sure you're a fuking man, stop acting like a woman scorning the OP and adding absolutely nothing to the conversation. Furthermore, negged.

edit: on r/c.
post 1445957343 06-05-2016, 01:59 AM
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Originally Posted By SuperMariBro⏩
I was working at the computer and SHE was the one screaming in MY ear. some how she flipped the whole thing around and was making me look like the culprit.
women are like children... if a child starts screaming at you what do you do?
post 1445957413 06-05-2016, 02:00 AM
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Originally Posted By FAH_Q⏩
As long as its the wall and not her then you're fine. Pretty normal as long as its a rare occurrence.Even if it is though you do need to have a little more self control
Bullchit, it's not normal to get violently angry at things like that. You need to take a look at what's making you react like that and seek help if you need it OP, this sort of thing is always the first step to you beating the chit out of her.
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post 1445957433 06-05-2016, 02:00 AM
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Originally Posted By SuperMariBro⏩
I was working at the computer and SHE was the one screaming in MY ear. some how she flipped the whole thing around and was making me look like the culprit.
Women have a nasty habit of doing that. Something isn't right here though you right to be mad srs
post 1445957493 06-05-2016, 02:01 AM
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4 hits and ONLY that much damage? Fuking lol, what was the argument about, you hitting like a little bitch? If you're hitting her pleasure hole just as gently, no wonder she is cranky all the time
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post 1445957583 06-05-2016, 02:01 AM
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Originally Posted By DonaldBastard⏩
Do you understand that she wears the pants in the relationship? She knows this. You don't seem to be aware of it though. There's nothing you can do about her behavior. This will happen again. I guarantee it. At some point you'll become one of those men who apathetically mumble"Gotta pick your battles"like a little estro bitchboy. With time, you'll become a submissive, passive husband simply going through the motions of life. Your wife will trash you behind your back, flirt with other men, and constantly belittle you to your face. This is marriage. This is what you agreed to, fella.
Reading this was brutal. So much truth. Fuk man, never getting married.
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