it was for the best OP. thanks for keeping updated.

I hate wedding bs. Imo the bride and groom should pay like 90-100% of everything for the main people at the wedding.

lol at your friend's ostentatious behaviour

I enjoyed a delicious 3 course meal at a friend's wedding last year, it even had lobster tail and then some insanely amazing cheesecake for dessert. I told her it was delicious and her response was "the catering cost $140,000"

I remember when we were playing board games once he told me I was changing the dice (major sore loser) and that I 'lacked honor' I told him I value my honor heavily and he better retract that statement, 'I won't' So I left right then, it was like 3 months where we didn't talk. So he's pulled this before. I gave him the benefit that maybe he grew up, in reality he only got worse.

BTW bros here is the email I wrote him [] are two names removed:

I’m glad your wedding was happy all around. I am going to get straight to the point as I find this email of my ‘itemized expenses’ both shocking and disturbing. It was never even remotely discussed that these suits would be purchases that would fall entirely on our own backs. The only conversation was that there would be suits compared to tuxes and to get measurements. I did and that was the end. With no talk of money up front I was expecting either a typical rental fee of ~100$ ( [other friend] was 80 for reference) or perhaps it might be covered given this was an extravagant wedding. There was certainly absolutely zero discussion if we would be interested in buying a suit or the range of money that such a purchase may cost and what we would be comfortable with; thus the thought never crossed my mind. It should be a surprise to no one that a suit is not something I want or need.


Understand I am glad you asked me to stand up for you, and I accepted - this was at both time and substantial cost getting out there that I did so. I did it because that’s what friends do, and after leaving never thought twice about it other than asking [Doormat] if these suits were gifts from you. (He never responded).


I am trying to be civil here because quite honestly I am angry and find this appalling. I asked some other friends about this situation to make sure it wasn’t my personal bias, across the board was shock and disgust that post-wedding I’d be given a bill, and of this magnitude. I spent a lot to go out to see you and to be hit with a surprise bill itemized out of how I owe over 500$ for your wedding is serious lacking in class and tact.


What address should I send all this back to? I am not paying over 500$ for something I never knew I was on the hook for and will never use again.

Nice one OP, well done for standing up for yourself unlike those pussy ass OPs who ignore the vast majority of advice and never update either. It seems you realise now that this person is not someone who'll really build you and make you a better person in this life, it always leads to uncomfortable situations with people who value money as the most important thing in their lives which this person seems to be. You deserve to have a better friend than that, stick to your guns, he'll secretly have to at least respect you for standing up to his bull**** instead of being a doormat. I guess you can only learn a lesson from the whole situation/past experiences, better to have no friends than someone like that honestly, seems like he only cares about himself and his own desires.

Are you closer friends with the other groomsmen? Just wondering how they took it.

Thanks bro^

No, the 4 groomsmen were me, his brother, the doormat guy and a lawyer friend. He even charged his brother, but got a discount and only owed him like 150$.

I miss some of the laughs we would have, but he was never a true bro. There was no way he was taking one for me, that was for sure. I guess I'll keep the socks for memory/lolz.

His wife kind of looks like a white michelle obama, definitely the pants of the relationship.

It blows my mind that your friend would actually have the balls (or absence of mind) to actually send bills to people at the wedding. I've never heard of any guest at a wedding getting billed for anything or having to pay for anything out of their pocket, other than gifts or possibly drinks.

Im curious to see what his response is. Personally, if i got a bill of this nature, id probably just laugh, toss it out and go NC on his ass.

Good email OP, even though you called the misc 'friends'.

Cheap bastards just value money above all else OP. I've learned to cut them out of my life (even family).

Invest your time in better friendships and you will forget about this guy soon.

Regarding the bachelor party, it's expected going in that the costs will be split among the guests (minus the groom, for whom the party is free). There shouldn't need to be a "Let's all go in on this" conversation, as that's pretty well implied, but the best man should have definitely communicated it anyway - just as a courtesy and to offer the right of refusal to anyone who wasn't comfortable with it. $75 is pretty cheap, though, as far as going in on a bachelor party goes. I wouldn't complain about that at all.

Regarding the suit, whenever I've been a groomsman, we always rented tuxes & paid for the rentals ourselves. Mind, those were $150 rentals, not a $500 purchase, and everyone knew what they were getting into beforehand. This groom just springing a bill on you is classless on his part.

Your reaction & level of honesty should depend on whether or not you want to remain friends with him and/or the other groomsmen in his wedding party. If you don't care, you could very well return the suit and tell him how unimpressed you were by him expecting, after the fact, that you foot the bill for a $500 suit you don't want. If you do care, tell him this was unexpected and that $500 is a significant amount (especially given all the other wedding-related expenses you've already paid for). Maybe try to work out a deal, and if he's not willing to be flexible or reasonable, revert to Option A: return the suit and peace out.

EDIT: Just caught up on the 8-page thread, including the email that was sent. Well done, OP. Handled it pretty much as well as you should have.

I kind of wonder if he will spring some suit of lawsuit on me, but so far pure silence. I can't believe how cheap he was, literally every person I told it to was shocked. I guess that is just the way he became. So concerned about debts like the story of splitting a 30$ bill 4 ways and how me and friend were like 25cents short and needed to put more in to get to the tip he wanted.

As much as I would live to say fcuk your friend, ask yourself this: Do you want this guy to show up to your future wedding? If you do, pay it up or go nc if you don't care to ever see this guy again.

ayyyyyyyy /thread

tempted to neg you op for even being friends with such a person. seriously sounds like the worst person to be around, but this isn't my life so i'll refrain

lol what in the fuk kinda dudes you hanging out with

Well as far as the bachelor party bill, it's assumed that the cost will be split between everyone and it's like a gentleman's agreement that the groom won't ever open his wallet for the party.

For the suit, that's bull****. Absolute bull****. If this seriously was not discussed beforehand, tell him that. Tell him you didn't agree to pay 500 for the suit. See what his reply is. If he pushes back, tell him to give you the receipt and return it. Either way, it's a complete dick move.

So update bros, it's been about a month or so since I dropped the email and it had been NC from him. I got a voice mail this morning from him and it started pleasant and essentially said he wanted to talk about the suit.

Haven't called back yet. The one thing the stuck out is he didnt say anything like 'I was wrong' etc. Knowing him, it will prob be about 'how about you pay me 200 and we've even'.

Yeah thats fair op...

I bought a new laptop last week and im replying to your thread. Soooooo thats gonna be 799 bucks bro.

























How bout you just gimme 400 and we call it even

Which of these last names is his:

Cohen
Robelsteinowitz
Shapiro
Hammermann
Oyveyelstein

Fuk that guy; call him back if you want (I wouldn't personally), but stick to your guns on this.

Are you gonna pay?

could have composed a better email than that in 5 minute, it rambles all over the place..

that said, I have a friend like this, and as it goes I'm seeing less and less of him over time, so is everyone else that knows him. Sh!t gets tedious

If he wants to talk about it call him and talk about returning the suit to him.

lolwat the caterer better have offered a lifetime supply of bj's and pussy fingering to the bride and groom at $140k

Call him back op. You're not doing it for yourself anymore. You have the misc to think about

So dumb.

I don't go to weddings anymore because of things like this.

Weddings/marriage is the most contrived bullchit ever and it seems like every person who has these elaborate weddings can't even afford it.