-Chick texts me that I haven't heard from in awhile
-Asks me how I'm doing, etc etc, something seems off
-I cut to the chase and ask her what she wants
-She says she needs help putting a set of shelves together
-I ask her what her roommates are doing and why they don't help
-She says they don't know how to use the tools (a fcking screwdriver and a hammer?) to put it together (what...in...the....fck)
-She says she'll buy me food if I help her
-I tell her I can't help today (working on motorcycle today, grocery shopping, haircut, errands in general)
-She gets upset with me because the shelves are just sitting there and they need to be put together
-I remind her that she hasn't contacted me in a long time and the first thing she does is tell me she needs help putting shelves together
-No answer


Lmao. Just lmao...

I just don't get it. I'm a nice guy but at no point have I ever been a doormat and yet here I am (all through this log) getting treated like one. The entitlement is something else.

Are you sure she wasn't just bull****ting you to give you a reason to come over? I would have just been like "Sure, I'll come watch you put your shelves together" and see where she takes that

Nah, she was legit upset about it because she had nowhere to put her clothes or some crap. She was even telling me her work schedule and seeing if I could fit an hour or two in somewhere in the next couple days in order to do it for her. Lol. What the fck. Some people just don't have any shame.

I think that was me that mentioned your personality and top-notch quality person you are and women being intimidated by you. Sounds like something I'd say. Anyways, to add to that, maybe they see you "too serious" and have your life in order too much that they feel like they can't relate to you or have fun with you. You already know majority of girls starting off dating or just dating around all want to have fun. If the dates are seeming too dull, then you'll have to change that up as well to keep things a little more fun and interesting for the girls.

I'm sorry, I've haven't been up to date with this thread, but from this last couple of posts, then is all I could give. On another note, have you met any girls around your age (or younger/older whatever) that lives your lifestyle? For example, hippies will only hook up with hippies. It's just something they can relate to and share the same beliefs with.

He'll still end up having to do it.

It probably was you that said it.

As far as the dates go, one can only have so much fun on a dinner date if that's where the date ends up happening. The last date I went on with the nurse chick a week and a half ago was in a giant corn maze that had 4 little islands you were supposed to find in the middle of the night. That was a lot of fun. We made out a bunch, had a good time, scared the **** out of a few people (my idea of course but she was game) and laughed until it hurt. She ghosted me the next day.

I try to pick activity dates if the person feels up for it so that's my usual go-to if possible.

Have I met girls my age? Sure. Ones that live my lifestyle? Nope. I'm not sure what I'd think of a woman that did anti-poaching work in Africa, worked in the middle east, hiked around SE Asia, studied French in northern Africa, etc etc. Most of the stuff I have done (and maybe will do again) isn't exactly safe. It's also extremely, EXTREMELY, rare for a woman to do any of it and I can't blame them if they didn't want to do it. It's not conducive towards breathing much of the time. That being said, I've met plenty of women while traveling and had an amazing time with them. But then the traveling ends and they end up in whatever random place they came from and I end up wherever I came from. It's hard to find them in person here because they don't usually online date and some of the ones that do are weird as fck. (srs) Plus, most women my age don't want to do that crap anymore, they want to settle down and have kids. That's also fine but that's where the whole "YOU QUIT A 6 FIGURE JOB, WTF!!!!!!" thing comes in and it's game over.

First of all, that corn maze date sounded fun as hell. Would love to find stuff like that out my way.

Anyways, from my little social experiment chatting and meeting up women from these dating sites and apps, I can 100% confirm that a lot of them are just there to find things to do on a random, lonely, and bored night. Some of them will set up dates a week in advance because they know that this Saturday, they're doing jack shiit. But one of the reasons why some guys experience the ghosting while randomly talking or chatting up a storm with a girl is because the girl met a different guy with more things going on that attracts her more. Some of them are just on there to have a good conversation for the night before they fall asleep and ghost you the next morning. Some just want free food.

You seem like a good guy, with a lot of things going on, however you do have a different lifestyle than most. Your next travels to help better the world and/or just back packing or what ever it is you do, make sure you get that girls contact number should you meet someone out there enjoying that same lifestyle as you. Keep in contact, chat often, and build a relationship. Continue living that lifestyle that you guys enjoy. (Is it weird that I'm associating your life with Leonardo DiCaprio's in my mind right now?) I think women out here are hearing/seeing that side of you and automatically assume it won't work out for them because they can't relate to the lifestyle.

if you were good looking and a chad you would not be in the situation you are in.

not saying your ugly, but your probably average. Also being muscular doesn't mean anything for women(aside from maybe a small niche). Muscles impress other men. good athletic natural frame, and not being fat is what matters with physique..

unfortunately being average looking for a man in 2016 is basically the same as being ugly when women are seeing beutiful people constantly through media, and even have these chads messaging them constantly inflating their ego.

most women arn't going to care about your skills, and vast knowledge of who knows what. not that it isn't important, but they simply do not care. they would be more impressed with some good looking trust fund kid that doesn't know how to do **** except take trips, adventures, and have fun, who can just pay everyone to do anything.

you have a condescending persona which i believe also drives them away.

You're right except that fostering a relationship with people when I travel means long distance. Looooooong distance. That **** never seems to work. As far as women ghosting, I agree with your reasoning. I think a lot of them see attractiveness + difficulty and then find attractiveness + easy with someone else and always, ALWAYS, pick the latter. A lot of these women tell me I'm great, amazing, good looking, really nice, a gentleman, etc and then it's the same thing every time so either they're full of **** (possibility) or they found the same thing in someone else who's going to be home at 5 pm every day.

I remember an ex said this to me when we were discussing future randomness:

"I want to come home to my boring life.....with some adventure"

She said it with some zeal too, I think that's what she really wanted. A standard/boring life (work in an office, come home and watch whatever television show) and then once a month or so, some adventure to Lake Tahoe or somewhere with the dogs. I guess I didn't fit in with that.Lol.

Yep, I'll tell that to the model I dated earlier this year. I'm not a Chad, she must have loved me for my condescending persona.

Next time just stick to your original account instead of the troll one.

"sometimes the sun shines on a dogs arse".

typical delusion of an Incel thinking model HBBs is "his league" because he got lucky once. lol

since you say dated earlier, that means you arn't anymore. looks like that wonderful personality of yours failed to retain her. i wonder if these womens opinions of you would go up or down, if they knew that you had a "dating log" that you share with strangers on a bodybuilding forum. lol. but yes keep thinking the women are the problem when the one constant is you.

the only difference between you and the typical average looking miscer that struggles with women is that you actually believe your on par with the Chads.

lol

True, some could be long distance af, but if you guys are feeling each other in person and then moved onto to text/email or whatever, then it could still get real. If you think about it, you have these travels sometimes right? They probably will be doing the same. What's to say you two don't happen to plan a trip together and go on more adventures? One thing leads to the next, things get serious, and then boom, yall are living together. Then that's when the happily ever after happens.

I think with how quickly the dating scene works, and how many random guys a girl can meet up or match with through these apps, they are definitely going for the attractiveness + easy every time. Whenever they hear your story, it's the + difficulty that's turning them off. Unfortunately for us men, they can afford to ghost people because chances are, they have 300 more messages waiting for them.

Dude quit being a diick. This thread, just like many others are here to help people. Not everyone wants to live in their mom's basement sitting being a troll account bashing on other people's misfortunes.

wat

I really hate generalization/painting people with the same brush but I'm human and entitled to my ignorance just like everyone else. LOL. With that said, it has been my experience and the experience of the men that I know, a lot of women seem to be insecure as fuk, have big time self-esteem issues and/or egos as fragile as egg shells.

It's really not entirely false. I've had things like that happen as well, and so have friends of mine. I remember when I was younger and mainly doing personal training that I would hear girls I worked with at the university's rec center say things like, "I could never date a personal trainer, I don't want a guy who looks good and makes me feel bad about myself" or "I can't date a guy who looks better than me," etc.

Another friend of mine who played professional basketball in Turkey used to tell me all the time about things like that that happened with women he would date. And he dated some really gorgeous women and had mad women crushing on him. Women are far more insecure about things that are actually good than you would think.

When I was broke, struggling and ass out earlier this year I had basically three girlfriends back to back and I literally was going through mild bouts of depression, ate cheap ass food and had to have some of them pay for dates. One of the most women laden periods of my life in terms of dating and hooking up. But fast forward to now, when the struggle paid off and big checks have been coming since late July to early August, ALL of those women dropped off AND I talked to higher quality, more successful, and better looking women and for whatever reason I couldn't get them. I said it before in another thread; haven't had sex in two or so months and haven't been on a date in more than double that time. But you know how it goes... **** bitches, get money.

Anywho, as far as the topic at hand... It is funny how it goes. You can get rejected for any number of reasons and absolutely none of them make sense. I literally had a girl who goes to the same university that I do, who never missed a beat when it came to making comments that basically stated she was sexually interested in me and attracted to me... Tell me that she wasn't attracted to me in that way. Like I would literally have this girl text me or just tell me how sexy I'd look whenever I put up a new training video on Instagram or ******** or somewhere and she'd like all my ****, tell me all this sexual stuff and then she says that. I wasn't even the one who started a lot of those comments off, either. She would constantly flake or treat me like a second option and then I called her on her bull**** and that's what came out. I just cut her off...and stayed focused on getting money, building my brand and working toward the PhD. Still talking to other women on the side and remaining focused on the task at hand.

^^^^^

I couldn't agree more.

This summer, I was out hiking with a group of people and being typical ranger mode I was making sure everyone got to where they needed to go safely. The hiking area was a bit dangerous. There was a girl in the group who said MAYBE 4 words the entire time. Super quiet, attractive, seemed like a dud though, just not much going on. Whatever. We do our hike, jump off some small cliffs, swim and then head home. That night the entire group goes out to the bars. I'm driving since I don't drink. After 3 or so hours out at the bar, she comes alive and tells me she's super into me and all this crap and how she was nervous to say anything, etc. Then she starts trying to make out with me and I shut it down because she's fcking hammered and I'm completely sober.

I tried talking to her a couple times since then......nothing. Maybe she's embarrassed about it, maybe she's not actually all about me, maybe she's just insecure. I don't know but I never get an answer. This is a repeating pattern all through my life too. I know for a fact that women are into me. (friends tell me, I hear them talking, alcohol makes them less scared as the story above shows, etc) and then when it comes down to nomal adult actions and communication, NOOOOOOOOPE.

It's interesting that some of the same things have happened to you. Maybe they really get themselves off at the thought of turning down someone they're attracted to? Maybe they're so goddamn insecure that they're literally that stupid. I don't know man. **** gets old though....

Haven't head from shelf building girl today. Lol. Maybe her useless roommates figured out how to use a screwdriver and put them together?

Stripped chick randomly texted me again and told me she made another solid 1,000 dollars some weekend night. Life on easy mode.

Heading to this party tonight, going to approach a few girls and see how it goes. One of them is dumb as a brick so there's that.

Hit up a girl I used to talk to from Seattle. She's fun and normal. Seems like any of the decent ones I talk to are never remotely near me. (Phoenix, Seattle, Vegas)

You guys keep talking about women being intimidated by men being in shape and having some level of success? I've literally never seen this in real life once. Never have known an facially attractive, inshape,good job career holding bro to do terrible with women or get constantly ghosted/flaked. I find it funny that several of you like to say "otaku have you ever thought thatyou'rethe problem? Apparently you guys suffer from the same thing but now its just magically women being intimidated lol. That sounds like the ultimate cope.

Well ranger. I hope you win. Got no girls into me except 2 obese women, and a single mom that hit hard times. Feels.

Hahahahahaha! I've had things like that happen too. Hearing through the grapevine that girls are interested only for them to be in a prime position to communicate with you like an adult and they bail. I had something happen yesterday with a few girls at the mall. Two weren't anyone that I would write home about, but one looked good. I think they may have been a touch young, but the immaturity came out when they said "Hey" to me. They did this numerous times as I was walking from store to store, and I was surprised that they never said anything. I was wearing my Strength Camp camo tank and I had finished training not too long before so I was looking clean. I walked by three times, and the third time I actually stopped and pulled one of my earbuds out. I said "Hey, what's up?" and they were like "Nothing." Followed by an awkward pause and an awkward smile. I asked, "Did you guys need something?" And they were like, "Nope. Just saying hey." So I just walked away.

By the gazes in their eyes I could tell they wanted to say something, but I just didn't want to waste my time and there were plenty of other things I wanted to get done yesterday anyway. Actually, it was a great day. Those childish women didn't ruin it, but I did think that was funny.

I've had this happen to me a few times. I have a lot of things going for me right now and whenever basic conversation happens, that stuff usually comes out. 75% of the girls would be intrigued and think I'm loaded, and then try to go shopping or do something like skydive for a first date. Lol @ skydiving for a first date. The other 25% of the women usually ghost. I literally had 2 girls hit me up randomly over this weekend in which I stopped talking to (or had little conversation with) and asked me if they did anything wrong lol. One of them I said, "well you didn't seem too interested" to and she was like "I'm sorry, you sound really busy and I'm just a boring girl." Anyways, I have a date with that one soon. So yeah, a lot of times some of these girls can be intimidated by you, your lifestyle, and achievements. They'll rather talk to dudes that's on the same page or level in life as them so they don't feel less of a person. Insecurities lol.

Have fun man! Have you ever had a wingman/woman?

Already told you to move brah. Why are you wasting time? Also, thought you were taking a break?The mall.
Three girls.

Bro.......were they 18-20 years old?

Hnnnnngggghhhhhh

But seriously, sounds like they were probably fresh out of high school and just stupid. Also, do you normally walk around with your headphones in? I never understood that.Never had a GOOD wingman or wingwoman. A lot of dudes seem to turn autistic when it comes to winging so it's whatever. I've had a couple of women pretend they were going to wing but it turns out they were interested (not attractive at all) so it ended up being a ****show of them drinking too much and then acting like a complete mess while crying non-stop.

And I've said 100,000 times I'm not throwing my career field away in the hope that I come across some girl. With my job I cant just "move". I have to set up a transfer essentially. IE: I should know in a few months. That government life. I am ? Haven't talked to a girl since the creation of this thread.

Haha usually whenever I wing for someone and we approach two women, I always end up getting further than my friend(s) lol. But, I know what you mean, some of them derp up hard. Especially when it's 2 guys approaching a single girl. Omg those are the worst times another person could wing for you because if they don't know how to play it, they'll derp it up hard.

Dude if you just want a meet up and bang her go on tinder. There are really easy girls there that just like to meet up. I use it when i just want easy meet up and now have a few fwb to call and meet up when I need to bust. If you are looking for gf material it will not be for you.

I usually don't walk around with my headphones in, but I was in a good mood and wanted some music in the backdrop. It also does help to ward away people with silly comments to make about my physique, which has been happening a lot lately.

But yeah, I think they were just generally really immature. No worries here. About to catch up with a client and friend who just got back from Brazil.

To be fair, you are giving time of day to a bunch of girls that the more experienced/terminally jaded amongst us wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole


One of my friends has been doing something similar all year - good-looking, fun guy but for some reason he's started treating girls that scream crazy/worthless with the same respect that's usually reserved only for higher quality people


Unless your exact response was 'phuck off, I'm not a handyman', you're being far too polite. And I say that as a fairly well-mannered Englishman




Edit: whole post assumes 'shelves' weren't just a flimsy pretense to get you in her room...

It's called honesty. i imagine people that come onto the INTERNET instead of inperson where people sugarcoat everything to avoid confrontation/hurting feelings, value truth above all.

but if all your interested in is a feel good circle jerk to reinforce whatever delusion you have, than alright continue. allow me to recommend some of GJLukes youtube channel videos while your at it.it is coping.

I get that you are interesting and have a lot of skills and passions, but how "fun" and "exciting" would you say you are and how good are you at connecting with women on an emotional level? How good are you and building emotional trust?

How good are you at making them feel like they need you in in their lives because you have something they have been missing?

Basically it's.... "how good of a bullchitter are you?" And it's a fair point. I've met quite a few guys over the years who have no problem picking up women and they have less going for them than most FA miscers. They're not rich... they're not jacked/shredded.... they don't have bomb-azz jobs.... they're not famous in any way.... but what they ARE is very good at selling themselves and entertaining people with bullchit stories about nothing. They regale women with stories of what they're THINKING about doing... rather than what they've actually done. And as I said, a lot of the time it works (sadly).

There are women out there who are smart enough to see through the charade and recognize a good guy when they see one, but they're rare. Esp. in this age of social media where everyone looks like they're living the high life 24/7. Just have to be patient.

This is definitely true. I've attracted some HORRIBLE women over the years and even very recently. I have a hard time being an ******* to someone unless they really deserve it and I think a lot of horrible people see that as a valid reason to try and walk all over me. It never happens but I'll be damned if they don't try.

I think growing up with a mom who lacked any real empathy for anyone made me terrified of becoming just like her so I overdo it the other way even to the point where it's not healthy sometimes. It's not even empathy at that point, it's non-confrontation for the sake of non-confrontation. At the same time, when it comes to douchebag guys, I can go from zero to KO status in .3 seconds so it's weird. Or if someone turns into a raging, drunk, bitchy woman, I also give zero fcks. I just give too much benefit of the doubt to sober, **** women.How good am I at playing games? Not very.

I don't tell them stories about my life, how I grew up in foreign countries, how I've lived all over. I don't tell them about my perspective on things that comes from the fact I've been hospitalized dozens of times before and on the verge of death so many times. I only tell these things over time. This is why, usually, after 4-5 dates, women generally really like me and we get along well. Up until that point, it's ghost central. And even after that point, a lot of women seem to resent me for reasons I still don't understand.

I'm a generally nice guy. I don't say things in order to get laid. I try to actually find a common connection with everyone. I know a lot of women have their guard up and that's fine. I just don't get the ones who tell me how amazing I am and how they want to get to know me and then I never hear from them again. Why lie about that crap?I completely agree with this statement.

UPDATE 11/6/16


So a horrible night last night. Jesus......

I won't go into details just because of detectives and other crap on the misc and I honesty feel sick to my stomach even though I didn't really do anything wrong other than breathing.

-Go to work party
-Plan on hitting up 2 girls I work with
-1 wasn't there, 1 left 10 minutes after everyone showed up because she had another party to go to.....great
-Another girl there is married
-She drinks too much
-Tells me she's falling in love with me
-3 REALLY good looking women show up but I'm in the middle of drama fest 2016
-I get zero chance to talk to the women
-I get a text from husband of woman who drank too much, he's raging mad
-**** storm ensues, I now have another person at the party blaming me for not shutting married chick down (in other words, not saying GET AWAY FROM ME or something of that matter)
-Now I have numerous people upset with me
-I'm completely sober just sitting there wondering what the fck just happened
-All the hot girls are there having a good time, one keeps smiling at me
-Drama hits 9000
-I leave
-99.9% sure I just ruined a marriage and I feel like **** about it even though I'm not sure what else I could have done other than not put myself in the position in the first place to even talk to the girl?

Fck man......

Not only did I not get to approach anyone, I got involved in complete drama with a bunch of co-workers and I have no idea what's going to happen with it. OF COURSE I get told from someone who's married that she's all about me. It can't be some cool single woman, it has to be some married woman who realizes I'm a nice guy who treats her better than her husband. Fck my life.

This is exactly me.That is actually a horrible turn of events, man. I think it feels worse than it will be now. Just stand your ground and let whoever asks know that you never made any advances and were simply existing in the same space. Things will die down a little and get back to normal. At the end of the day, it was some chick that couldn't hold her alcohol getting way too truthful with you, and nothing you did was your fault. I feel like something is missing here, though - why does her husband have your phone number? Have you ever done anything suspect with this woman?