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» Just Asked My 18 Year Old Son To Leave The House
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post 1537023571 12-09-2017, 03:27 PM
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Just Asked My 18 Year Old Son To Leave The House

Been a rocky year with a senior in high school. Skips class, been suspended, late for school, lousy grades. Completely being self destructive. Smoking , God knows what else. Verbally abusive.

Watched him walk off into the snow. After his mother told him there was no swearing in this house, he told her she was phuking pissin' him off and he hated living here.

Why? Because we told him his girlfriend couldn't come over until after he did some college applications and laundry were done. Kid isn't ready for the future, can't see 30 minutes in front of himself. Tried to have a conversation with him, he started yelling. I asked him to leave and if he didn't I was going to have the police do it.

I regretted it, and wanted to take it back, but he stormed out. Shut his phone service off. Want to be an entitled 18 year old? Ok, be an adult.

Feel terrible, blood pressure skyrocketing, but he's caused all the toxicity in the house. Not willing to fix his chit. Parental guilt. Any sage advice appreciated. Just wanted to get it off my chest.
post 1537023731 12-09-2017, 03:29 PM
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Well after 18 years of not parenting your kid correctly at least you finally asked the misc’s advice.
post 1537023741 12-09-2017, 03:29 PM
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Just let him bang bro

Also strong parenting kicking him out into a snowstorm and shutting off his phone

You're gonna feel dumb when they find his frozen corpse
I don’t want a large farva, I want a goddamn liter of cola

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post 1537023781 12-09-2017, 03:29 PM
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bang him to assert your dominance
post 1537023801 12-09-2017, 03:30 PM
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He'll be back once he gets cold lol
post 1537023851 12-09-2017, 03:30 PM
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Entitlement doesn´t fall out of the sky. It grows over the years. U should have been harsher in ur parenting.
post 1537023931 12-09-2017, 03:31 PM
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I got just the thing OP

post 1537023971 12-09-2017, 03:32 PM
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March him down to the US Marine Corps recruiting center and tell him he has a choice to make... live under your roof by your rules or start fending for himself. A stint in the Marines will knock that chip off his shoulder and help him pay for school when he gets out.
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post 1537024131 12-09-2017, 03:34 PM
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mirin balls of actually kicking kid out during storm lmfao
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post 1537024161 12-09-2017, 03:34 PM
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Originally Posted By AlBHappy
Been a rocky year with a senior in high school. Skips class, been suspended, late for school, lousy grades. Completely being self destructive. Smoking , God knows what else. Verbally abusive.

Watched him walk off into the snow. After his mother told him there was no swearing in this house, he told her she was phuking pissin' him off and he hated living here.

Why? Because we told him his girlfriend couldn't come over until after he did some college applications and laundry were done. Kid isn't ready for the future, can't see 30 minutes in front of himself. Tried to have a conversation with him, he started yelling. I asked him to leave and if he didn't I was going to have the police do it.

I regretted it, and wanted to take it back, but he stormed out. Shut his phone service off. Want to be an entitled 18 year old? Ok, be an adult.

Feel terrible, blood pressure skyrocketing, but he's caused all the toxicity in the house.Not willing to fix his chit.Parental guilt. Any sage advice appreciated. Just wanted to get it off my chest.
Does he know how to fix his sh!t? Does he know how to right his wrongs and get himself out the hole he dug? Does he feel like the situation is to ****ed to even try?
post 1537024181 12-09-2017, 03:34 PM
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Strong lack of parenting .
In Hoots We Trust.
post 1537024221 12-09-2017, 03:35 PM
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post 1537024331 12-09-2017, 03:36 PM
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He's 18 without money or place to stay, what could possibly go wrong?
post 1537024441 12-09-2017, 03:38 PM
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post 1537024491 12-09-2017, 03:39 PM
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My parents kicked me out when I was 17, I got a room in a house with some kids from the college in town I knew through partying, they said if I could pay the rent the room was mine. I partied like a rock star for like a year and a half before completely burning out. I made up with my parents when I was 19, got into a top 20 college, and eventually went to a top 5 mba school.

I'm sure things will work out the same for your son.

Or maybe he will end up sucking cawk under some bridge for $20.

it can go either way, good luck.
post 1537024621 12-09-2017, 03:40 PM
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Originally Posted By ScuffedLifter
Entitlement doesn´t fall out of the sky. It grows over the years. U should have been harsher in ur parenting.
I know a guy at work, and his kids are extremely well behave. 11 year old female and 13 year old male.

I talked to him about it, and he explained it in the exact opposite way of what you are suggesting. Parents always enter this power struggle with their kids.

"You should have been harsher"

What if instead, we empowered our kids more. Instead of responding to "Mom, I am hungry" with "you will just have to wait for dinner", you replace it with "you know where the fridge is, and you know how to cook and eat appropriately because I taught you"?

I am not a parent and never will be, but one thing that I would do, is avoid this power struggle. They will end up resisting just for the sake of resisting like we saw in OP's example.

He literally responded with the fact that his mom did not appreciate swearing, with swearing.

Swear. What is inherently wrong with it? Literally nothing. It shows a lack of intelligence if applied emotionally, like he did. But then you have that conversation with him instead of the "do what I say" conversation.

Show, don't tell.
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post 1537024681 12-09-2017, 03:41 PM
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Godly parenting skills, hope things work out for him.
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post 1537024731 12-09-2017, 03:41 PM
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Turn his phone back on

Go find him

You are his dad

You don't get to be the ******* when he's a difficult teen
post 1537024771 12-09-2017, 03:42 PM
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Originally Posted By MiscInformed
March him down to the US Marine Corps recruiting center and tell him he has a choice to make... live under your roof by your rules or start fending for himself. A stint in the Marines will knock that chip off his shoulder and help him pay for school when he gets out.
This is the best advice ITT and probably the only one that you'll get that's good.

His entitlement came from you and his mother spoiling the chit out of him.

Now deal wth it.
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post 1537024881 12-09-2017, 03:44 PM
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A father can in no way 'force' a kid to enlist. That is an insane approach. Mostly, because he legally cannot do that. Other reasons as well, but that is really all I need to justify my perspective.
“The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood. Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.“

PS: Don't eat poop, just don't let the idea of it stop you from living life to its fullest.
post 1537025011 12-09-2017, 03:45 PM
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Originally Posted By TheRougarou646
Does he know how to fix his sh!t? Does he know how to right his wrongs and get himself out the hole he dug? Does he feel like the situation is to ****ed to even try?
There lies the rub. He likes playing the victim. He goes to therapy, he sees the school psychologist to help with his "disbilities" that just arose the last year. It's always everyone else's fault.

The problem is he never got the chit kicked out of him. Walked off his job, and then was furious when I wouldn't give him money or let him drive the car because he wouldn't pay for gas. He just wants to procrastinate and avoid any part of his future.

I've mentioned him seeing a military recruiter, because he's going to be in college one semester and fail. Waste of money
post 1537025021 12-09-2017, 03:45 PM
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ITT a lot of **** advice.
post 1537025071 12-09-2017, 03:46 PM
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Go talk to him.........

if he doesnt want to talk, find a way. Youre a dad bro whether you like it or not. Not caring is the worst way to show you care....
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post 1537025171 12-09-2017, 03:47 PM
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send him to the army srs

they'll whoop him into shape and teach him discipline
TEXAS REPS
post 1537025281 12-09-2017, 03:48 PM
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Originally Posted By deft0nes
send him to the army srs

they'll whoop him into shape and teach him discipline
So I guess people actually think parents can force their kids into the military? This is really a thing? okay. That is interesting.
“The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood. Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.“

PS: Don't eat poop, just don't let the idea of it stop you from living life to its fullest.
post 1537025311 12-09-2017, 03:48 PM
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post 1537025371 12-09-2017, 03:49 PM
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College is useless anyways. Talk to him and figure out what he wants to do. If he wants to rot and screw around, let him and he'll realize the consequences soon enough.
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post 1537025421 12-09-2017, 03:50 PM
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Originally Posted By Ironmanlet
A father can in no way 'force' a kid to enlist. That is an insane approach. Mostly, because he legally cannot do that. Other reasons as well, but that is really all I need to justify my perspective.
This isn't really true. Judges have been giving wayward teens the option of joining the army or going to jail for years. At least they used to. It happened to my father and it straightened him out after he stole a car. The GI Bill put him through college when he got out. Sure, technically you can't enlist them without consent, but you can explain to them that 3-5 years of duty in the Marines will make a man out of him and give him the skills and confidence to tackle whatever problems life throws at him, not to mention learning some skills and getting access to the GI Bill when he gets out. The point is that the kid is a legal adult and has a choice to make... shape up or ship out.
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post 1537025431 12-09-2017, 03:50 PM
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Originally Posted By Rabbitjb
Turn his phone back on

Go find him

You are his dad

You don't get to be the ******* when he's a difficult teen
He didn't have his phone. Left it at his girlfriend's house. Asked him to stay, told him he was welcome to stay, and we'll talk through it over a beer, chose to leave.

He's always been an entitled kid. Thinks the world owes him something

In regard to dinners, we tell him, dinner's at 7, if you aren't going to be here, you're on your own. We make him do his own laundry, fold his own clothes. We made him invest 1/2 his paycheck when he was working for college. He's just a know it all pain in the neck
post 1537025441 12-09-2017, 03:50 PM
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RIP AlBHappy Jr.
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