All right, story time:

-OP gets a party invite from a guy he knows from 3 years ago. OP is his 3rd string party invite for when he doesn't have enough friends for some event. OP doesn't care because that's the only time he gets invites to anything social (maybe once every six months).
-The party is outdoors at 9PM, and a balmy 60 degrees.


-OP shows up in the latest FA fashion: NFL team jacket, cargo shorts, ball cap, and 2 year old sneakers.
-OP's awkward clothes end up becoming a weird conversation starter with like half a dozen people: "how bout dem Cowboys" for all the sports fans, and an "aren't you cold?" from everyone else. Hell no I'm not cold, this is a nice fall day back up North (I srsly was not cold).
-OP makes surface level conversation about classes, jobs, and sports with people. This is my comfort zone, but it's been so long since I've talked to people that I was still pretty awkward.
-It went OK, and didn't crash and burn like I was semi expecting. I'll call that a win. I definitely need to talk to more people though.
-People try to chug yards of beer on a dare and soon half a dozen people are puking in the bushes. **** that. OP remembers why college parties are overrated.


-OP sees one girl at the mostly-dickfest party that stands out from the pack. Tall, dark curly hair, dorky looking. This is like an IRL 4/10 but an FA ******* 7/10 - srs, that's my type.
-OP sees her there talking to some dude, assumes it's a bf or something, doesn't try to start a conversation.
-Girl walks up to him later. "Why are you dressed like that?"
-"Cause it's not cold! Where I'm from this is nothing." "Oh, you're from out of state? Same here."


-OP has mediocre convo with the HBB. She doesn't seem overly engaged, but doesn't shut him down either, and in OP's experience, she would have if she really didn't want to be talking.
-OP thinks about asking her out, then remembers that he has no social life. Unless she wants to suck his cawk while he's at home calculating amplifier impedances, he has nowhere to go and nothing to offer.
-OP remembers that this is the only girl he might meet for a very long time and starts Eminem'ing himself. "If you had one shot, one opportunity..."


-Some guy suddenly yells "****, cops are on the way!"
-Some ******* in the nearby apartments filed a noise complaint, and half the people there were underage and drinking.
-Everyone runs/stumbles for the exits.
-OP gets awkward bye in with HBB as she runs for the door.
-OP starts biking out of there as the red and blue lights come flashing down the road behind him.
-OP is a *******.

^^^^^
Bruh


Why do you dress in a way that draws attention in a negative fashion? Just wear normal clothes?

And you're doing what FA's do, shutting yourself down before you even make a move. Even if you were going to ask her out, the fact that you're already in your head making it seem like you have no shot is going to 100% show on the surface when you awkwardly try to ask for her number.

She has a vagina. That's what makes her different from you. A fcking vagina. Who cares dude? Just talk to her like a normal person.

Heh, my nikka...

You put yourself out there Opie, and I can’t emphasise enough how important that is.

You’re a bit too hard on yourself, but in my experience every single FA type feels similarly until he achieves some initial success.

That first date, first kiss, first lay... those are key building blocks, ya know? Until that point you operate under complete uncertainty. The first kiss is more critical than the next 500, cos it’s hard to go around believing you’re attractive to women when you have absolutely ZERO evidence that you’re attractive.

But yea well played Opie, and keep putting your ass out there.

I go for homely lookin’ bishes too. The last girl I dated looked like a giant mouse crossed with a librarian. You know the story behind the teenage mutant ninja turtles? 4 turtles and a rat crawled around in some radioactive ooze, and the result was Michaelangelo, Donatello, Leonardo, Raphael and Splinter. If you threw a mouse into that mix the result woulda’ been my ex.

Srs.

I didn't know it would draw negative attention. I got the invite via ******** and the address just said "some guy's apartment building". I figured if it's 9PM and they're drinking, it's going to be indoors, so I just stayed dressed for the indoors and wore a jacket for the 10 minute bike ride over. Then I show up and find out it's outside on their commons thing and everyone was dressed like it's Doctor Zhivago. IDK man. It's 60 degrees.

And yeah, I got fukt up with the mental side of things. It's like "best looking girl here (IMO), yep, forget it" and then 10 minutes later you're Johnny on the spot with her. That's when your brain takes something easy and makes it hard. I don't know how you get around that mental block, srs.

Son, I am disappoint! You were supposed to go there all muffed out in fitted clothes, fresh haircut, maybe even a work out in earlier in the day. Da fuk?

Aside from this, getting underage crunk and running from 5-0 are some of my best teen memorieslmao.

It's more interesting than studying, that's for sure. I'm 22 and was sober, so I'd probably be fine, but I got out of there cause I wasn't going to talk to any cops and deal with that BS.

Kinda reminds me of what happened thelasttime I partied with these guys last year.

Cliffs of cliffs is that a dozen guys (pretty much all of them minors) got white girl wasted at a house party, and no one thought ahead about the DD but me (I watched the guy who drove us all over pound his sixth screwdriver in the first 10 minutes and went straight for the Pepsi). Cut ahead a few hours, some neighbor knocks on the door and tells us to "quiet it down", everyone flips out and wants to GTFO, and it turns out that I'm the only sober guy left.

So I drove half a dozen drunk minors all around town in screwdriver brah's F-150 at 3 AM. And at the time, I hadn't drivenanycar in at least a year. I had no idea where anything was either, and my GPS was a guy who wasn't walking straight in the parking lot five minutes ago, so I'm just trying to squint for road signs and look out for cops. I got everyone home fine: it probably wasn't smart on my end but I got it done.

Very commendable of you, and it's sad that no one will probably show you the appreciation you deserve for taking the time out of your night to do all that. I've been in a similar situation and I just leave the party with no ****s given towards how anyone else gets out (besides people i came with).

What made the conversation mediocre though? Not that it matters since it's already in the past but if thats how you felt as you were talking to her, I'm sure she picked up on it. Not sure how long you guys were talking for but sounds like she was interested.

"You're a great guy, FA!" (flailing backslap). Then NC for six months. I didn't expect anything else, but damn, it really reminds you where you stand with some people.WRT the HBB, I just didn't get the feeling that she was that engaged. IE, I had a conversation with some brahs earlier that just felt kind of checked out. Just the normal "hey, what's your name, what's your major" stuff, and then talking about what we did this summer. Just kind of felt like I was going through the motions, like I wasn't that interested/engaged, and they weren't that interested/engaged. For 5 minutes of talking to someone I'll never see again, IDGAF. As long as I'm not going full FA potato, that's a win.

Talking with the HBB was exactly the same way - felt like it was going through the motions. Not asking any real questions, didn't really laugh at my humor. She did start the conversation, and again, IME, girls whodon'twant to talk to you will shut you down quick with one word answers and stuff, and I didn't get any of that. But again, nothing super engaging.

We talked for probably 10 minutes. I had talked with other brahs for maybe 10-15 mins, and they all just kinda walked off like nothing had happened. I think it's kind of the same thing here.

So...

I thought I had made a new friend. I met this guy at tennis, and we hit it off. He's enthusiastic about tennis, similar socio-economic background, similar level of education, similar interests (i.e. he's a nerdy fuk), etc.

Anyway, it turns out... and i'd be lying if i said I didn't have my suspicions... that he's gay, or rather i'm 99.9% sure he is.

Now, I don't have a problem with homosexuality or anything like that, but what's transpired has thrown into question the authenticity of our "friendship".

The whole situation has given me a slight insight into how girls must feel, meaning my head is stuck in this place where i'm like "does this dude actually like me or is he just attracted to me?"

Resist the urge to ridicule and laugh please.

Lolololololololololol


Anyway that's up to you if you wanna hang out with him or not.

If it was me, I wouldn't want to hang out with someone that had feelings for me but I didn't for them, whether it's a male or female.

Just talk about girls to let him know you ain't bout dat life lol

Don't get his hope up unless you ready for fudge packin bruh

Feels weird man. Don't know how I'd handle that, srs.

How is the book club going?

Yea it's tricky, it really is...

In his defence his behaviour honestly hasn't gone beyond "friendly", but... I have in the back of my mind that it could be like how betas hit on women, or to be more accurate, how they DON'T hit on women and instead act friendly hoping the girl will do all the leg work.

I'm just gonna carry on like I have been and probably do what Nedo's suggested, albeit subtly. A conversation will arise at some point where I can be like, "yea I met a girl a year ago, and she was amazing, bla bla bla bla".

The creative writing class is solid, but it's the final session this week

It's served it's purpose, which is to say i'm writing more, and I've met some cool people who i'm hoping might wanna meet up again but I wouldn't be surprised if things fizzle out.

I actually really, really, REALLY want to continue with it, but the next batch of lessons falls on the same night as my tennis lessons, and I feel the tennis lessons are more important at this point in my life. Hopefully I can pick it up again come spring time of next year, but it's annoying because I like to keep the momentum going with new projects.

Thought I would bump this


I am still waiting on the bureaucracy that is MEPs to get into the National Guard. Also decided to turn up the working out and apply for SF selection after I've been in the unit for a bit. Us_Ranger you happy?
Made 5k off litecoin and sold. Made 500 bucks off XRP. Gonna hold on it. Bought in at .25 a coin/share. Its at .50 now. If this crap hits a few bucks or goes into the teens in the next year or two? BOY.
Things are still going decently with the girlfriend. Her friends finally apologized for being sabotaging scum."
Working on a B.S in Software Development (WGU). Gonna apply for jobs in the spring/summer

Get a trade skill or get a STEM/Healthcare related degree. Disregard snowflakes and get paid my guy. Education IS a must.

-Pulled two straight all-nighters prepping for final exams this week, got in a big sleep deficit.

-Got Tyrannosaurus rekt on all my finals anyway, ho lee **** that circuits exam.

-Scheduled to take the GRE for 9AM today. Never prepped for it at all because of dat dere finals.

-Overslept my 6AM alarm and woke up at 8:30 AM. Saw the clock and shat a brick.

-I had passed out in my clothes from the night before, so **** it, I just wore those mf'ers again. Get dat dere ball cap to cover up my messed up hair.

-Floored it to get to the testing center by 9.

Cliffs: I literally rolled out of bed today and put up a 165 quant on the GRE. Feelsgoodman. Hopefully that will be enough to get some fellowships for grad school.

I'm flying out tomorrow to go back home, haven't been back in a year and have been missing home really ****ing bad. We're all gonna make it.

Good **** brah. It seems like the prices on cryptos has kind of stalled the last few days, so this is a good time to sell. Inb4 I wake up tomorrow morning and Bitcoin is at $100K.

Ripple/XRP just hit 0.86 per coin. I bought in at 0.25.https://asia.nikkei.com/Business/Dea...-trials-Friday

What would you say to someone who is interested in starting to look into this, but has no idea where to start? I don’t even know where to go to physically make these investments. Lol

Can't quite say things have been going well as far as the dating realm is concerned. Got curved two times in one day and I really thought I'd be able to pull it off considering the girls aren't really that cute anyways but it is what it is. If I'm being honest I didn't have good intentions with either and I was asking them out just to do it. I'm not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing but I don't even care anymore. Just got a paid internship in credit analysis with a great bank that hires from within etc. so at this point I feel like I'm set for life regardless of whether I'm getting laid or not.
Lol pretty sure I rekt all my finals too...tfw look at notes after final and realize you blew the equation you spent hours studying. The fact that I'm finally starting a paid internship in my field is the only thing stopping me from driving off of a bridge.

Sounds like things are going to work out for you, don't stressGood for you on the whole litecoin thing....one of my brahs was showing me how he trades litecoin etc and although he made his father 25k, he was stressing the hell out when it dropped 2 mins later lol I just can't get into it, I'm already stressed out with my relatively safe invesments. Then again might as well get into it cause my semiconductor investments took a major loss after the MorganStanley sell off and things don't seem to be getting any better so I'm really looking to pull out....the XRP thing sounds interesting, but one thing I haven't seen is a discussion about how net neutrality will affect bitcoin. I haven't done too much research on bitcoin so my understanding of it is probably flawed, but won't the new net neutrality legislation hurt bitcoin in a major way?

It seems pointless to ask out women you're not even attracted to tbh. I did that once and she said that was so sweet but she had a bf. My friend was making fun of me for this but at the time I didn't care. Now looking at it, I will only ask out women that I'm attracted to from now on. You don't want to boost the egos of uggos and fatties anyway. Where do you live where you're having this much trouble? I know it's also because you don't act like a stereotype. How would you rate yourself of a 1/10 scale?

Yeah it is but I'm honestly all out of options at this point, I figured I could at least get laid considering its been 6 or so months. I told myself I'd only ask women I'm attracted to too but desperate times call for desperate measures. I'd say the main issue for the past few months has been location. Things were a bit easier when I lived closer to campus, and I will be moving back considering I have a paid internship in town but for the past few months I've been living in a very small town. I've met a couple of girls who were dtf but they had boyfriends. They still flirted with me anyways but they weren't worth sacrificing my morals. All of the girls at my job are ugly or taken, I see a few cute girls at the gym or when I go to the grocery store but I don't want to do anything out of desperation, I'm very tempted to start though. I'll admit I don't try as hard as I used to...the idea of a relationship means a lot less to me nowadays, so I'm just not as motivated as I used to be and I'm sure that plays a part in it. That said I still take advantage of the opportunities provided to me, I just don't go outmakingopportunities like I used to.

I'm very unphotogenic imo but based on on the way girls react to me I think I'm a 7-7.5...8 with a lean face. Back when I was a shycel (up until I was 20/21) I had opportunities with hot girls that I didn't capitalize on, even in high school.At my old job quite a few hoodrats gave me IOIs and were actually pretty receptive despite the cultural differences...my roommates gf confirmed that most girls on my team had a crush on me. GFs always say they didn't think I would talk to them, one even said that she only kept talking me cause of my looks (very awkward first date). I can always get numbers when I go to the club, I just don't go as much anymore.

I've never felt like my looks were the problem..it's moreso that for some reason girls don't expect me to be such a nerd. My ex said that I reminded her of a thug...not sure why she said that and she was a little crazy, but it seems like the combination of being black+bigger than average leads them to believe I'm something that I'm not. Lately I've been making an effort to dress a lot more professionally/jcpenney ad so hopefully that will help. I might even to back to dressing like a skater just to prove my point lol

If you're as good looking as you say you are, have you tried Tinder/Bumble/other dating apps/sites? You might have better luck.

Plus what happened to that woman that you got the number of in one of your classes?

First and foremost kudos on the internship and school my guy. Secondly if that was a legit suicidal comment message me or any other decent poster on here. Life is too short to end it over something like women. Especially western. The entire idea of cryptocurrency was so people could move money around without the government, banks or etc being involved. IE: I send you 100 bucks in bitcoin, and then you convert that bitcoin back into 100 bucks. No government stole any via taxes, and no private entity took any via fees. Its the greatest idea ever. The issue right now is people are treating it as a commodity instead of a means of transfer. I do see some severe market correction / crashing in years to come but right now we outchea riding that wave.
Although I 100% believe crypto currency to be the future the massive boom right now is speculation. I think the best chance right to name some money is to purchase XRP. You'll need a Bitstamp account for that. And never spend more than you are afraid to lose.


To IamDetermined Im getting that "I can't figure you out stuff from my girlfriend at least a few times a week. Idk what it is but man women seem amazed that you can be a culmination of different things instead of some rigid ass stereotype

Your time will come boyo.

In addition to your own well being, the first above quoted is #1 and anything else has its time and place so keep ya head up and be positive.

When majority women on this team you speak of had a crush, that tells me you are attractive and correlate to the looks rank you gave yourself. You sure you ain't coming off weird or saying stupid chit? It can only be personality at this point based on what you describe.

IOI and you approach, every time.

Yeah I agree with the bolded, if they're giving signs of interest, your chances of getting that number increases. If they're not giving you IOIs, it's about 50/50. Might as well get a better shot unless he's one of those guys that's too nervous to approach, which I don't think he is. God it makes me think of all those times years ago of all the women that were giving me signs of interest but due to various circumstances, I was too nervous and overthinking to approach lol.

So I have a job, girlfriend and just got back from a cool vacation, working on programming which will increase my income ceiling once I get some experience, and I should be joining the National Guard to actually do something I want.


Why the hell do I feel so detached and just meh? Its a bit ironic because I've always thought most depression claims from people in first world countries was b.s

Should I harden the fuk up brahs?

You have everything you want and are still unhappy? Then the problem lies within. Try viewing your emotions in their proper context, chemical reactions in the brain. You don’t have to respond to them. Acknowledge your feeling, get curious about the nature of this feeling (I.E. what does depression FEEL like? Is it dark? Red? Black? Sad? Bleak?Only you can know this, it’s different for everyone). Finally understand impermanence. Follow your feeling until it eventually goes away, but be savvy. Know that it will come again. Treat it as an old friend until it leaves you once more. Your only mistake would be in trying to make it go away, this will cause you suffering.
Look into stoicism man, I think it would help you out (if not that look into mindfulness at the very least, if you aren’t already).

Im not really "unhappy". I've noticed when I'm not constantly doing things or surrounded by bros I feel "meh". Humans are social creatures so I wondering if my lack of interaction is causing this. Will look into stoicism.