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Forum » Wife in labor, I'm outside eating croissants AMA
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Thread: Wife in labor, I'm outside eating croissants AMA

post 1557363571 07-27-2018, 08:50 PM
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Just turned off inducing medicine (sorry, don't know the real terms for all this stuff) as baby wasn't having any of it and her heartbeat was all over the shop.

So back to natural contractions.

Wife is on pain drip which will hopefully help her deal with them.
post 1557364591 07-27-2018, 09:06 PM
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why you there though? its a hospital, they have doctors and nurses. go home you fuk. they will call you when the kid comes.
post 1557364791 07-27-2018, 09:09 PM
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Originally Posted By exxtracool⏩
why you there though? its a hospital, they have doctors and nurses. go home you fuk. they will call you when the kid comes.
I did go home for 2 hours but reckon I should be here to whisper useless chit into her ear when she's having contractions . I saw it in a movie.
post 1557365031 07-27-2018, 09:14 PM
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Originally Posted By SuperMariBro⏩
Just turned off inducing medicine (sorry, don't know the real terms for all this stuff) as baby wasn't having any of it and her heartbeat was all over the shop.

So back to natural contractions.

Wife is on pain drip which will hopefully help her deal with them.
Sounds like they had her on Pitocin. It just basically makes you have harder/stronger contractions. 7cm is great progress. Soon mane. Sooooon. Maybe baby just didn’t like the date to have her birthday lol. Tell your honey to stay strong.
post 1557365181 07-27-2018, 09:17 PM
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Originally Posted By SuperMariBro⏩
I did go home for 2 hours but reckon I should be here to whisper useless chit into her ear when she's having contractions . I saw it in a movie.
id rather pop a kid out of my azzhole then sit there for hours as my wife screams in my face.

fuk all that. go home bro.
post 1557366231 07-27-2018, 09:36 PM
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Originally Posted By exxtracool⏩
id rather pop a kid out of my azzhole then sit there for hours as my wife screams in my face.

fuk all that. go home bro.
I know behind those tough words there's a bit softy lurking brah.

Anyway, you do you
post 1557366261 07-27-2018, 09:37 PM
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Originally Posted By MadNinjaSkills⏩
Sounds like they had her on Pitocin. It just basically makes you have harder/stronger contractions. 7cm is great progress. Soon mane. Sooooon. Maybe baby just didn’t like the date to have her birthday lol. Tell your honey to stay strong.
Will do sir.
post 1557368251 07-27-2018, 10:14 PM
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Originally Posted By SuperMariBro⏩
14 I could do. But 2 days.... jaysus. Hope she comes before then.
Originally Posted By Rabbitjb⏩
Yeah, I’m sure the strain on you is absolutely intolerable

Just tell her to hurry the fuk up, she’s just drawing it out for the attention

Congrats anyway
Forget OP, or even the wife...think about how hard it must be for the rest of us reading this.
Originally Posted By devin45k⏩
OP just gave birth to the croissant he ate.
Ded.



Repped, OP.
post 1557368331 07-27-2018, 10:15 PM
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30 hours? In the movies the baby slides out in under a minute?
post 1557369581 07-27-2018, 10:38 PM
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Originally Posted By AVIK777⏩
30 hours? In the movies the baby slides out in under a minute?
Wish it were that easy
post 1557369741 07-27-2018, 10:41 PM
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Originally Posted By 401Delta⏩
Repped, OP.
Thanks buddy.
post 1557370871 07-27-2018, 11:09 PM
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Originally Posted By Rabbitjb⏩
Still no baby?

Is it possibly just gas?
Now 8 cm dilated

Could it be just gas? I've no idea
post 1557370991 07-27-2018, 11:13 PM
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Originally Posted By Rabbitjb⏩
Not long now then

Croissant shop open?
Lol yeh I already paid them a visit
post 1557371581 07-27-2018, 11:23 PM
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30 hrs is a long time. Wishing you and your family the best.
National Level Competitor (Female BB)
post 1557372171 07-27-2018, 11:32 PM
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Originally Posted By kimm4⏩
30 hrs is a long time. Wishing you and your family the best.
Very kind of you.

Thank you.
post 1557372821 07-27-2018, 11:46 PM
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Originally Posted By SuperMariBro⏩
Coming up to 30 hours and big progress as she is now 7 cm dilated. Jumped from 4 to 7 in about 3 hours. Massive leap (for us anyway lol)

Excitement is rising.

Game on!
If the Naked Gun taught me anything, when the time finally comes, you gotta hold your baby up and pretend to spike him/her like a football. The doctor will give you plenty of LULZ. Wife unlikely, but she's had her time in the spot light. Now it's your time to shine!!!!!!!
Just trying hard to not be a fat sack-o-chit.

Real Estate Crew
post 1557375201 07-28-2018, 12:53 AM
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Originally Posted By Baylorballs⏩
If the Naked Gun taught me anything, when the time finally comes, you gotta hold your baby up and pretend to spike him/her like a football. The doctor will give you plenty of LULZ. Wife unlikely, but she's had her time in the spot light. Now it's your time to shine!!!!!!!
Solid advice boyo .

Will consider
post 1557376251 07-28-2018, 01:36 AM
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Originally Posted By SuperMariBro⏩
Solid advice boyo .

Will consider
or do this

Cherish your life. Live to tell your story
post 1557379461 07-28-2018, 04:00 AM
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Originally Posted By Rabbitjb⏩
Well I’ve had toast and coffee,how we doing in here?
[image of Rabbit's head literally poked in there talking to the baby]<----- First thing that popped in my head after reading that ^^.
post 1557379501 07-28-2018, 04:01 AM
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Originally Posted By Rabbitjb⏩
Well I’ve had toast and coffee, how we doing in here?
My daughter

http://imgur.com/gallery/opOZtHj

It doesnt feel real. Im in disbelief
post 1557379591 07-28-2018, 04:04 AM
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Originally Posted By SuperMariBro⏩
My daughter

http://imgur.com/opOZtHj

It doesnt feel real. Im in disbelief
No pics loading, but I'm sure she's spectacular. Congrats, dude.
post 1557379621 07-28-2018, 04:04 AM
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Originally Posted By SuperMariBro⏩
My daughter

http://imgur.com/opOZtHj

It doesnt feel real. Im in disbelief
thank **** it doesn’t look like birdo.


Congrats. In about 12-13 years hell begins
post 1557379681 07-28-2018, 04:06 AM
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Thank you misc for the laughs, the trolling, the negs the greens and the advice.

It got me through 36 hours of utter madness.
post 1557379701 07-28-2018, 04:08 AM
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that must have been really painful damn
Disclaimer: All posts, statements, remarks and threads made by this user are fictional and/or satirical in nature and should not to be taken seriously and are not an accurate representation of this user's personality or beliefs.

Go outside and play.
Open your mind.
post 1557379711 07-28-2018, 04:08 AM
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Originally Posted By 401Delta⏩
No pics loading, but I'm sure she's spectacular. Congrats, dude.
Really????

Damn it. Link is crap?
post 1557379841 07-28-2018, 04:12 AM
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Originally Posted By Rabbitjb⏩
Congratulations on a 7 page thread

























Oh and the baby girl

Hope you’re all doing great.
Thank you!!!!!!
post 1557379911 07-28-2018, 04:14 AM
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Originally Posted By 401Delta⏩
No pics loading, but I'm sure she's spectacular. Congrats, dude.
Thank you lad
post 1557381641 07-28-2018, 05:34 AM
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Yay! Baby was slower than a sloth making her entrance, but I’m sure you and the honey are over the moon to finally hold her in your arms. Snuggle her often and take lots of pics. In the blink of an eye you’ll have a teenage turd on your hands and wonder where the time went lol. Congrats again.

P.s. Go buy your woman a nice push-present. After a labor that long, she deserves it.
post 1557383511 07-28-2018, 06:52 AM
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who is the real father of the child;
post 1557385731 07-28-2018, 07:59 AM
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Originally Posted By HardMofo⏩
who is the real father of the child;
considering op was a red insect

Not him
Samsbolton - 43 years of age:

*
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