I hate to be insulting if I am wrong, but looking at your avi, aren't you a woman?Both sides are surely selfish, of course dependent on the individual, but not sure why there is a debate on one being selfish and the other not.

Well a little background then to go with your opinion then if you don't mind. Are you a SAHM or aspire to be one? Aren't earning enough that the income would easily outpace childcare costs? I think there is probably something besides being female that goes into that opinion.

It seems some people are jumping ITT thinking I am anti SAHM, which I am not per say, it's just not a lifestyle for me. I am just shocked Lucifer would not even date a woman not interested in being SAHM. For me, and most guys I know, a woman who has SAHM desires wouldn't even be considered. I don't care if my neighbor's household has a SAHM, I'll be great friends with them, as I am sure Lucifer would be great friends with me and my girl if we were neighbors, it's not about some despise of the lifestyle. It's the opposite unacceptable traits in dating that have my mind blown, since I have never heard a guy with an outlook like he has.

Educated women scare most miscers, SAHM is the only choice. Hard enough to find one that you can relate to, now we're talking one that can outdo you? Fuk that noise, right babe?

Stay
At
Home
Miscin'

Ya, the place was crazy expensive, we stayed at the Ritz - was around 1k/night. I’m super into diving though, so I was in heaven.

In terms of this thread, exceptions exist, but for most fields if you to take a 5-7year break to raise kids, you really can’t just step back in, certainly would be an issue for teachers and nurses. But, again, it’s decision for every couple to make. I love kids, cooking, and even cleaning/organizing, if my wife was making like 400k I would have gladly stayed home.

breh my kid can write his full name with pretty decent lettering at age 4.25, i couldn't do the chit til first grade srs (country)

he's learned this not from me, but from daycare. they got some sense in there they teach em some stuff. he did sing drake one day though, so i had to play some nas for him.

I don't think you are wrong in many senses. I think insecurity drives desire of SAHM from the side of the guy. I don't take Lucifer as that type of guy though, I'd be overconfident if I had his body.There are severe consequences for this in most high end jobs. I guess people are quitting Burger King and then picking up at McDonalds, where I guess it wouldn't matter.

Not sheriff deleted post above me.

Not all jobs are 9-5 either, some people work from home, some have rotating schedules. Lot of dynamics here related to women raising kids at home, but I spend an almost equal amount of time with my kids as my wife. They also spendsometime at pre-school or with an overqualified caregiver (from the same previous pre-school).

I think one of the primary differentiators here may be what I believe is best for the child during the critical formative early years. I don't take a utilitarian what-costs-less view on the development of a human being. There is controversy on daycare benefits and risks, but I'd rather stay on the conservative side when dealing with the psychological health and well-being of my child.

Remember, your young child's brain is like a sponge - their personality will develop out of the environment in which they're exposed to. If there are levels of toxicity in the daycare center that you don't know about, it can be influencing your child. You may say I'm paranoid, but I've seen enough evidence that issues in adulthood almost always stem from childhood environments.

It is my responsibility as a parent to create the best possible environment, and guarantee it to the best of my extent. That was one of the reasons I didn't commit to my ex, I wasn't confident that she would present the best environment consistently.

Socialization, conflict etc. is an important part of development too though, and I'd be happy to utilize either childcare benefits, have friendships with other parents etc. to expose them to that.

And that isn't even touching the added simplicity of life as per my previous posts, with regards stress levels and clear complementary roles and responsiblities.I also understand this concern, you have to differentiate one from the other. If a woman has the same mindset as myself, as per her SAHM reasoning, that's great. SAHM is not synonymous with lazy and unambitious, although it is an indicator to drill into.

It all comes with time, neither doesn't have to be the end all be all 24/7. Right now my wife is SAHM while we are building our family. Once the kiddos go off to school (elementary), we've talked and she wants to go back into the workforce. She doesn't want to go back into the medical industry though so we are looking at what she might do. Maybe a loan officer or something along those lines.

She did go to school and get a degree but did not really like the "grunt" work being a Phlebotomist. Or working on kids/responsibility of someone's life or working on people with HIV/etc. Afterthought though and I am sure if she knew this ahead of time she would have gone in a different field, but when you're 18, what do you expect?

So that being said, if she switches up and works, great. If she doesn't she doesn't HAVE to work but it is definitely up to her and she probably will. She still works a bit as she is really good seamstress and makes clothes and when she has time she makes a couple hundred here or there.