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Just got an update on my Cancer srs
01-09-2019, 10:35 PM
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#361
Sucks brah. Someone close to my family just got diagnosed with metastatic cancer. Prayers
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01-09-2019, 10:38 PM
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#362
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Originally Posted By Dennis71⏩
I just got off the phone with Miss Cleo. She says she was in contact with Zyzz for you. He says it's not your time yet. He says he'll see you down the road... much, much further down the road. He says don't sweat it, you got this. You're gonna make it, brah!Hey all. Some times i forget about this thread, because im trying to balance working 40+hrs a week, managing my appointments and finances, and still managing to spend time with my gf and the family.
On another note. My biopsy came back positive for lymphoma obviously. Lol. Ive had consultations, and start 20 rounds of radiation on monday 1/14/19. And then restart immunotherapy.
Radiation oncologist said his intent with the treatment is curative.
Im starting to feel a bit naive for constantly being so hopeful, but being anything less isnt worth it to me.
I think back to 3 years ago. Living in kansas city. About to move to florida bc of my job promotion. I remember thinking to myself "im gonna be making so much money, im in the best shape of my life, moving by the beach...How could my life get any better??"
Well. Here i am. I guess i answered that question. It didnt. Maybe i peaked at 25 and the fall was hard. Some of us need to go through difficulties to learn about ourselves.
Sometimes i wonder how my life wouldve turned out if i never moved to florida. I'll probably never say it aloud in earshot of anyone, but its my biggest regret in life, and its not even close.
Anyways, thanks guys. I appreciate how supportive everyone has been. I started getting teary eyed at work reading some of the comments.
Edit: to anyone asking if ive attempted any specific supplements or fads, like fasting, or keto, or ect etc.
Yes. Ive tried everything. There probably isnt a cancer patient out there who hasnt. And thats from me speaking to other patients in lobbies and infusion rooms.
On another note. My biopsy came back positive for lymphoma obviously. Lol. Ive had consultations, and start 20 rounds of radiation on monday 1/14/19. And then restart immunotherapy.
Radiation oncologist said his intent with the treatment is curative.
Im starting to feel a bit naive for constantly being so hopeful, but being anything less isnt worth it to me.
I think back to 3 years ago. Living in kansas city. About to move to florida bc of my job promotion. I remember thinking to myself "im gonna be making so much money, im in the best shape of my life, moving by the beach...How could my life get any better??"
Well. Here i am. I guess i answered that question. It didnt. Maybe i peaked at 25 and the fall was hard. Some of us need to go through difficulties to learn about ourselves.
Sometimes i wonder how my life wouldve turned out if i never moved to florida. I'll probably never say it aloud in earshot of anyone, but its my biggest regret in life, and its not even close.
Anyways, thanks guys. I appreciate how supportive everyone has been. I started getting teary eyed at work reading some of the comments.
Edit: to anyone asking if ive attempted any specific supplements or fads, like fasting, or keto, or ect etc.
Yes. Ive tried everything. There probably isnt a cancer patient out there who hasnt. And thats from me speaking to other patients in lobbies and infusion rooms.
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01-10-2019, 08:07 AM
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#363
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Originally Posted By lukeaye⏩
Im happy with how my life has gone, and feel like ultimately ive impacted enough peoples lives. This is what my life was meant for and i understand that.I don't know you, but reading this thread and other peoples stories like it just get to me so badly.
For some reason I can just relate and feel for you so intimately even though I've never had cancer or met you.
Makes me feel so lucky for absolutely nothing and everything at the same time.
We never know what our life has in store for us, even you at this point.
For some reason I can just relate and feel for you so intimately even though I've never had cancer or met you.
Makes me feel so lucky for absolutely nothing and everything at the same time.
We never know what our life has in store for us, even you at this point.
I do not fear death, nor do i fear any type of future treatment or procedure i have to endure.
My biggest fear is what will happen after me...
How will my gf of 4 years handle it? She has nobody in florida but my family and i.
I have two older brothers. Im 28, one who is 29 and another that is 33. And i know my mom would be absolutely crushed. I remember after my appointment from the OP, she cried in the car and screamed and cursed God asking what she did wrong for this to happen to me.
****s rough
Misc'in since '07
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01-10-2019, 08:12 AM
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#364
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Originally Posted By MattyMiscer⏩
This, if they had no hope they would not treat you op, please keep your hopes high AND fight this thing.Stay strong brah
01-10-2019, 08:18 AM
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#365
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Hang in there, brah. Sending everything positive your way for you and your family.
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01-10-2019, 08:20 AM
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#366
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Originally Posted By cyran22⏩
the evidence is clear that ONCE you have the cancer rampant, there isn't much you can do in terms of chemo/radiation. change in diet/stress/etc isn't going to change (sadly).I'm hoping things get better for you. Your story is very inspiring and I'm really grateful you've shared it with us.
Have you adjusted any of your diet or habits and have they helped? Are you familiar with the new research about how the gut and brain/immune system are much more closely linked than previously thought?
I recently got (mildly) sick where I would feel pain after each meal and have the runs every day for a few months. I ended learning a lot from researching and healed by gut through probiotics and tons of fermented foods. One of the books I read (Brain Maker by Dr. Perlmutter) was citing new research how a ton of diseases like cancer are associated with unhealthy gut flora (not enough good bugs in your stomach).
I'm hoping for the best for you and will be following.
Have you adjusted any of your diet or habits and have they helped? Are you familiar with the new research about how the gut and brain/immune system are much more closely linked than previously thought?
I recently got (mildly) sick where I would feel pain after each meal and have the runs every day for a few months. I ended learning a lot from researching and healed by gut through probiotics and tons of fermented foods. One of the books I read (Brain Maker by Dr. Perlmutter) was citing new research how a ton of diseases like cancer are associated with unhealthy gut flora (not enough good bugs in your stomach).
I'm hoping for the best for you and will be following.
what you can do is reduce risk factors that may lead to cancer developing (diet/exercise/etc). also, cancer is just random mutation going awry as well, so you can only reduce the risk by a certain amount.
its a roll of the dice.
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01-10-2019, 08:48 AM
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#367
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Prayers for you brah, wish you the very best.
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01-10-2019, 09:05 AM
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#368
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Forget my question I saw it reading thru the thread.
Also hoping for the best brah! Kick butt, as others said it ain't over till its over.
Also hoping for the best brah! Kick butt, as others said it ain't over till its over.
Are you not entertained?
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01-10-2019, 09:22 AM
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#369
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Originally Posted By Dennis71⏩
Much love for you brother. You're handling it as best you can, and that is all anyone can do.Im happy with how my life has gone, and feel like ultimately ive impacted enough peoples lives. This is what my life was meant for and i understand that.
I do not fear death, nor do i fear any type of future treatment or procedure i have to endure.
My biggest fear is what will happen after me...
How will my gf of 4 years handle it? She has nobody in florida but my family and i.
I have two older brothers. Im 28, one who is 29 and another that is 33. And i know my mom would be absolutely crushed. I remember after my appointment from the OP, she cried in the car and screamed and cursed God asking what she did wrong for this to happen to me.
****s rough
I do not fear death, nor do i fear any type of future treatment or procedure i have to endure.
My biggest fear is what will happen after me...
How will my gf of 4 years handle it? She has nobody in florida but my family and i.
I have two older brothers. Im 28, one who is 29 and another that is 33. And i know my mom would be absolutely crushed. I remember after my appointment from the OP, she cried in the car and screamed and cursed God asking what she did wrong for this to happen to me.
****s rough
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01-10-2019, 09:26 AM
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#370
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Originally Posted By IronILLinois⏩
^^This. Went through cancer with my wife (she's a survivor, thank God) and now her dad is very sick with cancer. It's a total B but hang in there, man, the positive mindset is so powerful.Praying for you brother.
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01-10-2019, 09:30 AM
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#371
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Originally Posted By Dennis71⏩
<3Im happy with how my life has gone, and feel like ultimately ive impacted enough peoples lives. This is what my life was meant for and i understand that.
I do not fear death, nor do i fear any type of future treatment or procedure i have to endure.
My biggest fear is what will happen after me...
How will my gf of 4 years handle it? She has nobody in florida but my family and i.
I have two older brothers. Im 28, one who is 29 and another that is 33. And i know my mom would be absolutely crushed. I remember after my appointment from the OP, she cried in the car and screamed and cursed God asking what she did wrong for this to happen to me.
****s rough
I do not fear death, nor do i fear any type of future treatment or procedure i have to endure.
My biggest fear is what will happen after me...
How will my gf of 4 years handle it? She has nobody in florida but my family and i.
I have two older brothers. Im 28, one who is 29 and another that is 33. And i know my mom would be absolutely crushed. I remember after my appointment from the OP, she cried in the car and screamed and cursed God asking what she did wrong for this to happen to me.
****s rough
rooting for you hard bruh
you should read this
https://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=179438063
negs for using "of" where it should be "have"
01-10-2019, 09:33 AM
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#372
01-10-2019, 09:40 AM
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#373
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inshaAllah you come out of this healthier than before bro. Part about your mom made my heart hurt. You got this!
01-10-2019, 10:52 AM
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#374
Originally Posted By Dennis71⏩
As a mother this brought all the feels. Fight fight fight and don’t give up or lose your positivity! You are in my thoughts and prayers. <3Im happy with how my life has gone, and feel like ultimately ive impacted enough peoples lives. This is what my life was meant for and i understand that.
I do not fear death, nor do i fear any type of future treatment or procedure i have to endure.
My biggest fear is what will happen after me...
How will my gf of 4 years handle it? She has nobody in florida but my family and i.
I have two older brothers. Im 28, one who is 29 and another that is 33. And i know my mom would be absolutely crushed. I remember after my appointment from the OP, she cried in the car and screamed and cursed God asking what she did wrong for this to happen to me.
****s rough
I do not fear death, nor do i fear any type of future treatment or procedure i have to endure.
My biggest fear is what will happen after me...
How will my gf of 4 years handle it? She has nobody in florida but my family and i.
I have two older brothers. Im 28, one who is 29 and another that is 33. And i know my mom would be absolutely crushed. I remember after my appointment from the OP, she cried in the car and screamed and cursed God asking what she did wrong for this to happen to me.
****s rough
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01-10-2019, 12:00 PM
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#375
I'm battling with myself whether to answer your last post. I haven't faced this as a mother but have in part as a GF and as a sister in law. And I've faced my own mortality
I can tell you that your loved ones, should the worst happen, will grieve badly. It will be life consuming and painful but it is also in some way love and life affirming and the pain, eventually lessens.
We never forget our loved ones. We never stop loving or remembering them but eventually we do so with a calm and somewhat pleasant reflection.
I think we always worry for those we may leave behind. I've been at that brink myself too and I recognise that pain as a mother. It was the hardest to think of abandoning them.
There's a book we used to read to our kids about rabbits called "No Matter What" that ended with 'love like starlight never dies"
don't fear for those you love. that's their battle to face and they will be able to
should they ever have to
I can tell you that your loved ones, should the worst happen, will grieve badly. It will be life consuming and painful but it is also in some way love and life affirming and the pain, eventually lessens.
We never forget our loved ones. We never stop loving or remembering them but eventually we do so with a calm and somewhat pleasant reflection.
I think we always worry for those we may leave behind. I've been at that brink myself too and I recognise that pain as a mother. It was the hardest to think of abandoning them.
There's a book we used to read to our kids about rabbits called "No Matter What" that ended with 'love like starlight never dies"
don't fear for those you love. that's their battle to face and they will be able to
should they ever have to
01-30-2019, 07:22 AM
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#376
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Originally Posted By jreacher⏩
Doing well.^^^ Rabbit always brings wise words. And, damn, I'm gonna check out that book...
Dennis, how are you doing?
Dennis, how are you doing?
On week 3 [of 5] of radiation sessions.
No side effects. Just sucks ass driving to the clinic every morning.
But if that's my biggest complaint, then I'll take it.
Misc'in since '07
2x cancer survivor
01-30-2019, 07:25 AM
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#377
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Originally Posted By Rabbitjb⏩
I've read this post many times. And every single time. I literally cry.I'm battling with myself whether to answer your last post. I haven't faced this as a mother but have in part as a GF and as a sister in law. And I've faced my own mortality
I can tell you that your loved ones, should the worst happen, will grieve badly. It will be life consuming and painful but it is also in some way love and life affirming and the pain, eventually lessens.
We never forget our loved ones. We never stop loving or remembering them but eventually we do so with a calm and somewhat pleasant reflection.
I think we always worry for those we may leave behind. I've been at that brink myself too and I recognise that pain as a mother. It was the hardest to think of abandoning them.
There's a book we used to read to our kids about rabbits called "No Matter What" that ended with 'love like starlight never dies"
don't fear for those you love. that's their battle to face and they will be able to
should they ever have to
I can tell you that your loved ones, should the worst happen, will grieve badly. It will be life consuming and painful but it is also in some way love and life affirming and the pain, eventually lessens.
We never forget our loved ones. We never stop loving or remembering them but eventually we do so with a calm and somewhat pleasant reflection.
I think we always worry for those we may leave behind. I've been at that brink myself too and I recognise that pain as a mother. It was the hardest to think of abandoning them.
There's a book we used to read to our kids about rabbits called "No Matter What" that ended with 'love like starlight never dies"
don't fear for those you love. that's their battle to face and they will be able to
should they ever have to
Misc'in since '07
2x cancer survivor
01-30-2019, 07:25 AM
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#378
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Originally Posted By Dennis71⏩
God speed bruh. Keep up them spirits!Doing well.
On week 3 [of 5] of radiation sessions.
No side effects. Just sucks ass driving to the clinic every morning.
But if that's my biggest complaint, then I'll take it.
On week 3 [of 5] of radiation sessions.
No side effects. Just sucks ass driving to the clinic every morning.
But if that's my biggest complaint, then I'll take it.
you should read this
https://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=179438063
negs for using "of" where it should be "have"
01-30-2019, 07:36 AM
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#379
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I'm sorry bro
But you hVe to stay positive and fight you can beat this and I've seen it first happen first hand.
But you hVe to stay positive and fight you can beat this and I've seen it first happen first hand.
"it takes a wise man to know when he is in error and a noble man to admit to it"
01-30-2019, 07:37 AM
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#380
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Originally Posted By Dennis71⏩
Hey man, what have your latest test shown?Doing well.
On week 3 [of 5] of radiation sessions.
No side effects. Just sucks ass driving to the clinic every morning.
But if that's my biggest complaint, then I'll take it.
On week 3 [of 5] of radiation sessions.
No side effects. Just sucks ass driving to the clinic every morning.
But if that's my biggest complaint, then I'll take it.
Keep us updated..
"it takes a wise man to know when he is in error and a noble man to admit to it"
01-30-2019, 08:12 AM
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#381
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Originally Posted By Dennis71⏩
Mirin your overall mindset man!Doing well.
On week 3 [of 5] of radiation sessions.
No side effects. Just sucks ass driving to the clinic every morning.
But if that's my biggest complaint, then I'll take it.
On week 3 [of 5] of radiation sessions.
No side effects. Just sucks ass driving to the clinic every morning.
But if that's my biggest complaint, then I'll take it.
I come back to this thread from time to time to humble me.
You don't know me and likely never will but you've influenced my life!
Whenever I'm here I think about what I really want and how some minor arguments with friends and family are totally unnecessary.
Everytime I leave this thread I contact my parents, some friends and try to spread some positivity.
Thank you for that Dennis, I truly wish you're gonna make it through all this.
Looking forward to updates, keep fighting!
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02-28-2019, 07:40 AM
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#382
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So. Its 2/28/19
Had an appointment with my dr Tuesday and he said the ultimate end goal is to attempt to get me into remission in order to do a bone marrow transplant.
I have two older brothers so they are a potential match. Was really shocked at the plan bc hes been against a BMT the last 2 years.
Says it's my only realistic shot rn at a durable remission and life span.
Hate the idea. Bmt has a 40% mortality rate.
To add onto the **** news, my insurance lapsed 1month from when I switched Obamacare to my work insurance and my medical bill from that is over 45k.
Unreal. Add it to the 50k+ plus already going to collections.
I literally had the perfect life before this cancer ****. Now I have "a" life.
Seems like everything is starting to stack against me and it's really hard to stay positive. I've called out a work the last day and have barely got off the couch. Have zero motivation for the gym.
And I literally can't stand the way I look when I look into a mirror. Some days it makes me ****ing cry. I cant stand to look at.my.own avatar on here bc I'll never look that good ever again.
I'm basically demoralized and defeated. So tired of all of this
This is a cancer that 95% of people get cured from, so why is it me in that 5%
I can never let my family or gf find out this is how I really feel.
Had an appointment with my dr Tuesday and he said the ultimate end goal is to attempt to get me into remission in order to do a bone marrow transplant.
I have two older brothers so they are a potential match. Was really shocked at the plan bc hes been against a BMT the last 2 years.
Says it's my only realistic shot rn at a durable remission and life span.
Hate the idea. Bmt has a 40% mortality rate.
To add onto the **** news, my insurance lapsed 1month from when I switched Obamacare to my work insurance and my medical bill from that is over 45k.
Unreal. Add it to the 50k+ plus already going to collections.
I literally had the perfect life before this cancer ****. Now I have "a" life.
Seems like everything is starting to stack against me and it's really hard to stay positive. I've called out a work the last day and have barely got off the couch. Have zero motivation for the gym.
And I literally can't stand the way I look when I look into a mirror. Some days it makes me ****ing cry. I cant stand to look at.my.own avatar on here bc I'll never look that good ever again.
I'm basically demoralized and defeated. So tired of all of this
This is a cancer that 95% of people get cured from, so why is it me in that 5%
I can never let my family or gf find out this is how I really feel.
Misc'in since '07
2x cancer survivor
02-28-2019, 07:47 AM
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#383
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OP do not kick yourself while you are down.
Do not defeat yourself by letting yourself lament your circumstances.
You might have had a perfect life before, and maybe this is less than that... But it's still your fukking life. And if you have to do some things that surprise you to preserve it, do them.
You should also let your loved ones in. Pushing them away and seperating them from you emotionally because you are trying to protect them will hurt them almost just as much. Enjoy their presence in your life. Enjoy your presence in theirs.
You can do this brother.
Don't let yourself give up. Don't let yourself give in. Do everything you can to keep positive. Do everything you can to keep your mind strong.
All you can do is influence how you feel about things. All you have is right now. All you have is this moment.
And if tomorrow brings uncertainty, know that you lived to the fullest today.
If tomorrow may not come, know that you did everything you could today.
If you go, go knowing that you made the most of your time. Everything serves to make you a kinder and more caring person. When you come out of this you will see that. You will be grateful for the terrible times that molded you to be loving, and caring... That made you stronger. That made you a better version of yourself for those you love.
You can do this brother.
Do not defeat yourself by letting yourself lament your circumstances.
You might have had a perfect life before, and maybe this is less than that... But it's still your fukking life. And if you have to do some things that surprise you to preserve it, do them.
You should also let your loved ones in. Pushing them away and seperating them from you emotionally because you are trying to protect them will hurt them almost just as much. Enjoy their presence in your life. Enjoy your presence in theirs.
You can do this brother.
Don't let yourself give up. Don't let yourself give in. Do everything you can to keep positive. Do everything you can to keep your mind strong.
All you can do is influence how you feel about things. All you have is right now. All you have is this moment.
And if tomorrow brings uncertainty, know that you lived to the fullest today.
If tomorrow may not come, know that you did everything you could today.
If you go, go knowing that you made the most of your time. Everything serves to make you a kinder and more caring person. When you come out of this you will see that. You will be grateful for the terrible times that molded you to be loving, and caring... That made you stronger. That made you a better version of yourself for those you love.
You can do this brother.
02-28-2019, 07:53 AM
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#384
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Originally Posted By Dennis71⏩
I'd do the bone marrow test thing if you want. (srs)So. Its 2/28/19
Had an appointment with my dr Tuesday and he said the ultimate end goal is to attempt to get me into remission in order to do a bone marrow transplant.
I have two older brothers so they are a potential match. Was really shocked at the plan bc hes been against a BMT the last 2 years.
Says it's my only realistic shot rn at a durable remission and life span.
Hate the idea. Bmt has a 40% mortality rate.
To add onto the **** news, my insurance lapsed 1month from when I switched Obamacare to my work insurance and my medical bill from that is over 45k.
Unreal. Add it to the 50k+ plus already going to collections.
I literally had the perfect life before this cancer ****. Now I have "a" life.
Seems like everything is starting to stack against me and it's really hard to stay positive. I've called out a work the last day and have barely got off the couch. Have zero motivation for the gym.
And I literally can't stand the way I look when I look into a mirror. Some days it makes me ****ing cry. I cant stand to look at.my.own avatar on here bc I'll never look that good ever again.
I'm basically demoralized and defeated. So tired of all of this
This is a cancer that 95% of people get cured from, so why is it me in that 5%
I can never let my family or gf find out this is how I really feel.
Had an appointment with my dr Tuesday and he said the ultimate end goal is to attempt to get me into remission in order to do a bone marrow transplant.
I have two older brothers so they are a potential match. Was really shocked at the plan bc hes been against a BMT the last 2 years.
Says it's my only realistic shot rn at a durable remission and life span.
Hate the idea. Bmt has a 40% mortality rate.
To add onto the **** news, my insurance lapsed 1month from when I switched Obamacare to my work insurance and my medical bill from that is over 45k.
Unreal. Add it to the 50k+ plus already going to collections.
I literally had the perfect life before this cancer ****. Now I have "a" life.
Seems like everything is starting to stack against me and it's really hard to stay positive. I've called out a work the last day and have barely got off the couch. Have zero motivation for the gym.
And I literally can't stand the way I look when I look into a mirror. Some days it makes me ****ing cry. I cant stand to look at.my.own avatar on here bc I'll never look that good ever again.
I'm basically demoralized and defeated. So tired of all of this
This is a cancer that 95% of people get cured from, so why is it me in that 5%
I can never let my family or gf find out this is how I really feel.
you should read this
https://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=179438063
negs for using "of" where it should be "have"
02-28-2019, 07:58 AM
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#385
- nothingshocking
- Join Date: Jan 2017
- Location: Uranus, Gambia
- Posts: 36,399
- Subscribers: 5
- Rep Power: 952290
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Originally Posted By Dennis71⏩
Can you appeal to the mods and get approval to post a go-fund me? Some guy from my HS was recently diagnosed with brain cancer, and they raised $30K in 12 days. I kicked in $100 and I didn't even know the guy, I'm sure others did the same.To add onto the **** news, my insurance lapsed 1month from when I switched Obamacare to my work insurance and my medical bill from that is over 45k.
Unreal. Add it to the 50k+ plus already going to collections.
Unreal. Add it to the 50k+ plus already going to collections.
02-28-2019, 08:02 AM
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#386
- badbl00d
- Registered User
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- badbl00d
- Registered User
- Join Date: Jul 2015
- Age: 44
- Posts: 42,044
- Rep Power: 363602
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Originally Posted By Dennis71⏩
Why? Because you were the one they always leaned on? You were the shoulder they cried on? We all can't be strong all the time brah. You just can't, and sometimes even the strongest of men need the help of others. This isn't something trivial brah...This is your mortality...This is your life, and the people who love you aren't going to switch up because you need a "shoulder to cry on". You're going through a lot, and it's perfectly normal for you to feel all the feelings that you are feeling. Sometimes getting chit off your chest, is the best temporary medicine.So. Its 2/28/19
Had an appointment with my dr Tuesday and he said the ultimate end goal is to attempt to get me into remission in order to do a bone marrow transplant.
I have two older brothers so they are a potential match. Was really shocked at the plan bc hes been against a BMT the last 2 years.
Says it's my only realistic shot rn at a durable remission and life span.
Hate the idea. Bmt has a 40% mortality rate.
To add onto the **** news, my insurance lapsed 1month from when I switched Obamacare to my work insurance and my medical bill from that is over 45k.
Unreal. Add it to the 50k+ plus already going to collections.
I literally had the perfect life before this cancer ****. Now I have "a" life.
Seems like everything is starting to stack against me and it's really hard to stay positive. I've called out a work the last day and have barely got off the couch. Have zero motivation for the gym.
And I literally can't stand the way I look when I look into a mirror. Some days it makes me ****ing cry. I cant stand to look at.my.own avatar on here bc I'll never look that good ever again.
I'm basically demoralized and defeated. So tired of all of this
This is a cancer that 95% of people get cured from, so why is it me in that 5%
I can never let my family or gf find out this is how I really feel.
Had an appointment with my dr Tuesday and he said the ultimate end goal is to attempt to get me into remission in order to do a bone marrow transplant.
I have two older brothers so they are a potential match. Was really shocked at the plan bc hes been against a BMT the last 2 years.
Says it's my only realistic shot rn at a durable remission and life span.
Hate the idea. Bmt has a 40% mortality rate.
To add onto the **** news, my insurance lapsed 1month from when I switched Obamacare to my work insurance and my medical bill from that is over 45k.
Unreal. Add it to the 50k+ plus already going to collections.
I literally had the perfect life before this cancer ****. Now I have "a" life.
Seems like everything is starting to stack against me and it's really hard to stay positive. I've called out a work the last day and have barely got off the couch. Have zero motivation for the gym.
And I literally can't stand the way I look when I look into a mirror. Some days it makes me ****ing cry. I cant stand to look at.my.own avatar on here bc I'll never look that good ever again.
I'm basically demoralized and defeated. So tired of all of this
This is a cancer that 95% of people get cured from, so why is it me in that 5%
I can never let my family or gf find out this is how I really feel.
No man is your friend
No man is your enemy
Every man is your teacher
Black Crew
Lol @ Tradies Srs
AP4 crew
02-28-2019, 08:04 AM
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#387
- HomerJThompson
- Registered User
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- HomerJThompson
- Registered User
- Join Date: Jan 2012
- Age: 50
- Posts: 13,602
- Rep Power: 21472
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Originally Posted By Dennis71⏩
You need the support from your family and loved ones, you need to tell them. Keep on fighting pleaseSo. Its 2/28/19
Had an appointment with my dr Tuesday and he said the ultimate end goal is to attempt to get me into remission in order to do a bone marrow transplant.
I have two older brothers so they are a potential match. Was really shocked at the plan bc hes been against a BMT the last 2 years.
Says it's my only realistic shot rn at a durable remission and life span.
Hate the idea. Bmt has a 40% mortality rate.
To add onto the **** news, my insurance lapsed 1month from when I switched Obamacare to my work insurance and my medical bill from that is over 45k.
Unreal. Add it to the 50k+ plus already going to collections.
I literally had the perfect life before this cancer ****. Now I have "a" life.
Seems like everything is starting to stack against me and it's really hard to stay positive. I've called out a work the last day and have barely got off the couch. Have zero motivation for the gym.
And I literally can't stand the way I look when I look into a mirror. Some days it makes me ****ing cry. I cant stand to look at.my.own avatar on here bc I'll never look that good ever again.
I'm basically demoralized and defeated. So tired of all of this
This is a cancer that 95% of people get cured from, so why is it me in that 5%
I can never let my family or gf find out this is how I really feel.
Had an appointment with my dr Tuesday and he said the ultimate end goal is to attempt to get me into remission in order to do a bone marrow transplant.
I have two older brothers so they are a potential match. Was really shocked at the plan bc hes been against a BMT the last 2 years.
Says it's my only realistic shot rn at a durable remission and life span.
Hate the idea. Bmt has a 40% mortality rate.
To add onto the **** news, my insurance lapsed 1month from when I switched Obamacare to my work insurance and my medical bill from that is over 45k.
Unreal. Add it to the 50k+ plus already going to collections.
I literally had the perfect life before this cancer ****. Now I have "a" life.
Seems like everything is starting to stack against me and it's really hard to stay positive. I've called out a work the last day and have barely got off the couch. Have zero motivation for the gym.
And I literally can't stand the way I look when I look into a mirror. Some days it makes me ****ing cry. I cant stand to look at.my.own avatar on here bc I'll never look that good ever again.
I'm basically demoralized and defeated. So tired of all of this
This is a cancer that 95% of people get cured from, so why is it me in that 5%
I can never let my family or gf find out this is how I really feel.
02-28-2019, 08:07 AM
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#388
- ANumber1
- Duke of New York
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- ANumber1
- Duke of New York
- Join Date: Jul 2013
- Location: New York, United States
- Posts: 18,570
- Rep Power: 128694
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OP,
You are a tough SOB, and the inspiration for the Navy SEAL copypasta.
I don't have anything useful to say, but reading your thread, somebody needs to tell you that you handle all this chit like a warrior and that it's worthy of praise.
You're frustrated and demoralized, and that's understandable, but you're a good person who cares for those around you and we're all behind you, pulling for the best. Keep your head up, srs.
You are a tough SOB, and the inspiration for the Navy SEAL copypasta.
I don't have anything useful to say, but reading your thread, somebody needs to tell you that you handle all this chit like a warrior and that it's worthy of praise.
You're frustrated and demoralized, and that's understandable, but you're a good person who cares for those around you and we're all behind you, pulling for the best. Keep your head up, srs.
Nah, fukk that. I’m not doing that.
02-28-2019, 08:09 AM
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#389
- ChristmasFnatic
- Resident Rocker
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- ChristmasFnatic
- Resident Rocker
- Join Date: Jun 2008
- Age: 46
- Posts: 48,058
- Rep Power: 353855
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Brah. Talk to your gf and family. It helps esp if you are close to them. Im sure they will gladly give support.
And yes, dont give up yet. Keep the Faith!
And yes, dont give up yet. Keep the Faith!
02-28-2019, 08:16 AM
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#390
- lsiberian
- Banned
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- lsiberian
- Banned
- Join Date: Sep 2008
- Location: Fort Worth, Texas, United States
- Age: 43
- Posts: 18,408
- Rep Power: 0
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Originally Posted By Dennis71⏩
I know the feeling. The BMT sucks, but you'll get through it. I had a tandem autologous bmt for my recurrent testicular cancer. I'm 42 days away from being done with the 100 days. Now we wait to see if I'm in the 60 percent cure group or the 40 percent you'll probably die group. Yesterday I was holding my wife thinking she might not get to experience me holding her too much longer.So. Its 2/28/19
Had an appointment with my dr Tuesday and he said the ultimate end goal is to attempt to get me into remission in order to do a bone marrow transplant.
I have two older brothers so they are a potential match. Was really shocked at the plan bc hes been against a BMT the last 2 years.
Says it's my only realistic shot rn at a durable remission and life span.
Hate the idea. Bmt has a 40% mortality rate.
To add onto the **** news, my insurance lapsed 1month from when I switched Obamacare to my work insurance and my medical bill from that is over 45k.
Unreal. Add it to the 50k+ plus already going to collections.
I literally had the perfect life before this cancer ****. Now I have "a" life.
Seems like everything is starting to stack against me and it's really hard to stay positive. I've called out a work the last day and have barely got off the couch. Have zero motivation for the gym.
And I literally can't stand the way I look when I look into a mirror. Some days it makes me ****ing cry. I cant stand to look at.my.own avatar on here bc I'll never look that good ever again.
I'm basically demoralized and defeated. So tired of all of this
This is a cancer that 95% of people get cured from, so why is it me in that 5%
I can never let my family or gf find out this is how I really feel.
Had an appointment with my dr Tuesday and he said the ultimate end goal is to attempt to get me into remission in order to do a bone marrow transplant.
I have two older brothers so they are a potential match. Was really shocked at the plan bc hes been against a BMT the last 2 years.
Says it's my only realistic shot rn at a durable remission and life span.
Hate the idea. Bmt has a 40% mortality rate.
To add onto the **** news, my insurance lapsed 1month from when I switched Obamacare to my work insurance and my medical bill from that is over 45k.
Unreal. Add it to the 50k+ plus already going to collections.
I literally had the perfect life before this cancer ****. Now I have "a" life.
Seems like everything is starting to stack against me and it's really hard to stay positive. I've called out a work the last day and have barely got off the couch. Have zero motivation for the gym.
And I literally can't stand the way I look when I look into a mirror. Some days it makes me ****ing cry. I cant stand to look at.my.own avatar on here bc I'll never look that good ever again.
I'm basically demoralized and defeated. So tired of all of this
This is a cancer that 95% of people get cured from, so why is it me in that 5%
I can never let my family or gf find out this is how I really feel.
It sucks to go from super fit and healthy to beaten down. I hope we make it brah. I've started getting visions of heaven and it's truly amazing, but I really don't want to leave my wife behind. Cancer sucks.
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