So what are the signs that a person has bpd?

How did the relationship mentally affect you?

ken-o said it pretty well.

initially we hit it off incredibly. there was so much passion, so many strong feelings, it felt so real

Then she pushed me away as a defense mechanism with her bpd. it hurt a lot and i didn't really understand

extremely rough ending, and my mental health was broken as chit. it took me like two months to recover

My older brother was recently diagnosed with this disorder.

I love my brother, but he can be very difficult to be around. He’s very self centered, selfish and any little thing he will grasp onto and blow it out of proportion for attention. Yet, if someone else has a huge problem he brushes it off like it’s nothing. He has a hard time having a meaningful relationship with women.

So what are the signs that a person has bpd?

I always thought I had aspergers, now you're saying I have BPD. Only thing is I'm married.

What are the signs and symptoms of BPD?

If I had to characterize it with one sentence....

Everything in her life was overdone. She had no ability to moderate things.

Truthfully though, the signs and symptoms are very consistent with a lot of other mental health issues so in order to really know, the person needs to be officially diagnosed by a psychologist (which my ex wife was).

I’m super familiar with it. I used to facilitate a process group in the military behavioral health department specifically focused around Dialectic Behavioral Therapy.

I literally bought these two books last week after talking to a miscer about some of the context. I have a vision to start a misc process group, using the DBT workbook as a guide.

I haven’t got all the details hashed out, but here is the opportunity.

Of course while DBT was developed for BPD, anyone can benefit from it.

I may start the introductory thread later this evening, just gauging interest in the thread and outlining details of the program and skills developed through it.

Someone please imbed

https://imgur.com/a/fvNzNpn

Does it work?

I'm having a hard time trying to differentiate BPD from Bipolar disorder

Does it work?

I'm having a hard time trying to differentiate BPD from Bipolar disorder

Something that can be helpful to keep in mind with BPD is its familial association (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3150490/) meaning that it runs in families.

I dated a woman for two years whom I suspect has BPD and has not been diagnosed. Her mother has it and has been in therapy for it and appeared to find it helpful; she certainly was more stable, at times, than my ex-girlfriend. I had hoped that the family history would have served as a bridge, and; that my ex would have been more open to acknowledging her disposition and eventually engaging in strategies to help manage it. I, unfortunately, neglected to consider the fragility of her ego and the extents that she would go to in order to maintain it.

She projected her own toxicity onto others; constantly accusing the people who cared about her of disingenuously trying to take advantage. She made a routine of poisoning her relationships, one transgression at a time, until they reached a threshold of toxicity and she would then disengage. Each of her relationships, whether it be with a coworker, friend, best friend, family member, me as her boyfriend, etc, was somewhere on the cycle of being slowly poisoned or on a cool down. Eventually it got so bad that the only two major relationships that she was focused on was her relationship with me and her relationship with her mother. I continued to urge her to seek professional help, for her own benefit and for the sake of our relationship, however; nothing that I said could ever penetrate.

I often felt like I was speaking a different language and the absolute inability to effectively communicate eventually wore me down. She was convinced that I was the literal embodiment of every wrong she had been done. Her projection of her own toxicity onto others allowed her to then displace onto them the stresses that her ego could not stand to bear. I spent a lot of time pondering the question of how someone whom was presumed to hate me so much would go to lengths to keep me around and it eventually started to really get to me. I began to hate myself for all of the trauma that I caused and, at that point, I had to get out. We lived together at the time and there was no immediate economical exit strategy. We seemed to have come to an agreement to keep things cool until the end of the month and we would both go separate ways.

Cliffs for the story time ahead: didn't happen.

I was awakened to her viciously mounting the bed and striking me in the face. She gave me a black eye. I hopped out of bed, naked, and found myself cornered against the wall as she continued to lunge at me, screaming and holding my phone in one of her hands. She alleged to have caught me cheating on her (I wasn't - the notification she is presumed to have seen was from my roommate who had forgotten his keys and was in an uber home), destroyed my phone, and then threw it at me as I attempted to cover up and get out of the house. She had me backing up through the living room, trying to get my underwear on, when she ducked into the kitchen. I ran out the door. Halfway down the street I heard the door open, turned to look back, and saw her coming with a knife. Ran all through the neighborhood and lay low while she threw all of my things out of the window.

Someone evidently called the police and they took statements from the both of us. She said that it was just a disagreement that never got physical; I provided my battered face, shattered phone, and sidewalk full of belongings as proof of battery and destruction of property. The cops concluded that, since they weren't witness to the battery, the destruction of my phone, or the depositing of my belongings on the sidewalk, and because our stories were in disagreement, that nothing warranted their actual involvement. They did, however; order me to surrender my key to the house. I complied and left to find a parking lot to sleep in before returning the next day, with police, to recover the rest of my things. She had conveniently tossed everything, including my refrigerator and two car seats, into a neat pile in the backyard, on top of my scooter. Police didn't seem to find any issue with that, nor would they allow me into the house to retrieve any of the specific items that I had not found in the pile. Cut my losses and took off.

At the time I was working at a local high school and she knew that the coming Monday was the first day back from spring break. She and her brother drove onto the school grounds, broke into my truck, and she smeared her literal feces all over the inside of my vehicle and then posted about it on instagram. The school resource officer was mandated to report the crime as it occurred on school grounds, during school hours, and involved a school employee (me). At that point I felt it necessary to get a restraining order. The judge granted an immediate order of protection on my word alone, and the next judge saw fit to extend the order for the year after hearing both hers and my accounts. The last I saw of her was at that hearing. I never wish to see her or hear from her or her family ever again. Both her and her brother are on court ordered pretrial probation as a result of two felony counts, each, for the incident with the truck.

Stay safe.

In a nutshell what you're dealing with is a broken person with deep seated issues.

BPD makes it difficult for an individual to intrinsically regulate their emotion so they are reliant on outside sources, which is why a lot of people with BPD ooze sex appeal, it's their way of getting narcissistic supply (BPDs are also narcissistic), in addition to taking drugs and other intoxicants; anything to take away the 'emptiness'.

Then there's splitting, which is categorising a person as either good or bad, nothing in between, and it is the component that causes the mental instability.

One moment you're her Prince Charming and then next moment,as soon as you do something 'wrong' she will forget all the nice things about you and focus only on the negatives, so there will be no empathy, even though BPD individuals are capable of feeling it even more so than neurotypicals.

To sum it up, don't get sucked in by outside appearance, although it hard not to, since these are usually the super fkn hot girls that dudes will do and say anything to get to f*ck

Wears you down. They always come back. It takes a miracle to break free. And it takes a lot of therapy to recover and be able to move your life forward. They're crazy. I don't know if they're in control of their actions and want to make your life miserable to appease their own pain, or if they genuinely are possessed with this uncontrollable insanity. Screaming, crying, blaming, anger, cheating, attention-whoring, manic episodes make up so many interactions. But on the other hand, the good interactions which become fewer and fewer until they want to win you over again, are so incredible. so sweet, so loving, incredible sex. and she was so beautiful. they convince you that you are their savior and their everything. but nothing you do can help them.

hadn't heard from my bipolar+bpd ex in months, was productive and finally happy, and she began bombarding me constantly through text, email, Venmo, calls begging for me to respond. "Coincidentally" when I decided to move to a new city. I broke after a week of this and ended up responding because she truly seemed to be manic and in pain and was sending money and nudes and hysterical. First I messaged to say stop, it's gonna be okay, then I began feeling bad for her and was nice to her. Of course she was relentlessly loving and sweet and it brought back all these feelings. Then I realized what I did and blocked her on her new channels of communicating with me. now I'm depressed as fuk again. it's crazy because it feels like you're torturing them by not taking them back, and it feels like you're torturing them when they have you again and decide to become cold and apathetic and lash out at you constantly. I regret dating her so much. but life goes on.

Wife is diagnosed BPD & Bipolar.

Takes work.

Yes a few months ago. I only dated this girl for TWO ****ing weeks and a half and she made my life a living hell. She became a stalker after I broke up with with her, harassed my family, etc. If you know a sloot with BPD .. RUN AWAY