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Forum » [SRS] Depression Discussion and Support Thread Part III
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Thread: [SRS] Depression Discussion and Support Thread Part III

post 1610586891 07-14-2020, 02:35 PM
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How am I supposed to just live in spectator mode all of my life?
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post 1610603601 07-14-2020, 05:31 PM
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If you're depressed, stay strong and never give up. Better days are in store.

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass; it's about learning to dance in the rain." - Vivien Greene
post 1610613821 07-14-2020, 07:40 PM
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Originally Posted By eod8989⏩
And another thing is I get anxiety and paranoid when I go places alone. I cant just go places and strike up condos with people or any of that. It sucks but its like what can you do alone? It isn't fun going places alone. Its pointless
Yeah, I don’t get how going places alone is supposed to be fun. That’s why I never go to the beach or to the mall or anything since I have no one to go with. It’s so boring & depressing doing things alone. Before the pandemic all I would do is go to work, to local stores for clothes or movies or to go grab some food. Besides that I was just at home since there’s nowhere to go by myself.
post 1610708201 07-15-2020, 05:41 PM
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Originally Posted By BigTimePlayer⏩
Yeah, I don’t get how going places alone is supposed to be fun. That’s why I never go to the beach or to the mall or anything since I have no one to go with. It’s so boring & depressing doing things alone. Before the pandemic all I would do is go to work, to local stores for clothes or movies or to go grab some food. Besides that I was just at home since there’s nowhere to go by myself.
It's not man it's actually kind of annoying lol. Like i said i can just buy stuff online so no point in going to a poverty store now days. They are always out of stuff anyways. Going to the beach or gym isn't fun alone because there are always groups being social. What sucks is that i will never be anyone's best friend. For some reason everyone i meet always has a best friend but it is never me. Idk what i am doing wrong. It just sucks being quiet.
PC specs

i9 9900k/AMD RX 6800 16 GB/16 GB RAM/LG BX 65'' OLED/Gigabyte GS27QC 27''



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post 1610767561 07-16-2020, 10:22 AM
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Originally Posted By eod8989⏩
What causes your depression brahs? Or triggers it?

For me i'm pretty sure it's sexual frustration and isolation. I don't think it's chemical i think i just get triggered by these things almost daily. I just don't know how to fix it.
For me its the gym closure. The entire day all I could think about was working out, it was the only time I didn’t worry about anything. When I would go to bed I would look forward to the next day. Now i have nothing to look forward to.
-Some people say good things come to those who wait, truth is, good things come to those who work..... who work later.....who work harder...... who are willing to go further than anyone else to get them. If you're waiting for good things to come to you, you'll be waiting for a pretty long time.

-I'd rather live life saying "I failed" than "I could have"
post 1610804411 07-16-2020, 05:06 PM
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Originally Posted By Merc009⏩
For me its the gym closure. The entire day all I could think about was working out, it was the only time I didn’t worry about anything. When I would go to bed I would look forward to the next day. Now i have nothing to look forward to.
Did you socialize with people there? Man it's crazy how some people can't even go the gym or lose their gains over this COVID crap. Thankfully i have a home gym.
PC specs

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If you aren't getting stronger you aren't getting bigger crew
post 1610804781 07-16-2020, 05:10 PM
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I just don't know what people talk about. How does everyone seem to have these connections but me? I don't connect with people and don't know what to talk about with people anymore. People at work just talk about netflix or politics or their family or dog etc. It's like there is no way to even make a change.
PC specs

i9 9900k/AMD RX 6800 16 GB/16 GB RAM/LG BX 65'' OLED/Gigabyte GS27QC 27''



OLED Master Race crew
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If you aren't getting stronger you aren't getting bigger crew
post 1610919321 07-17-2020, 06:38 PM
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Feel like the only one who has depression. I have been quiet all my life and have just stayed to myself except for a couple years when i worked retail i opened up and became social but then i started drinking and smoking and i was really social from 2012-2015 but when i quit smoking and drinking in 2014 and 2015 i became quiet like my old self again. I've never been a social person (basically a hermit) and i don't know what is wrong with me.
PC specs

i9 9900k/AMD RX 6800 16 GB/16 GB RAM/LG BX 65'' OLED/Gigabyte GS27QC 27''



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post 1610977221 07-18-2020, 12:25 PM
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My issue is I just don’t know how to get to where I want to be in life in most areas. Career wise my dream job just feels out of reach due to how unrealistic it feels & my personality. It’s impossible in terms of a social circle at this point if I’m not going to meet anyone at work or at random. That ship has sailed since I didn’t make the right friends in school. My entire social life now is texting with a few people & that’s the extent of it. Life just sucks & is so boring the way it is now. I don’t know how to change anything anymore though.
post 1610980981 07-18-2020, 01:25 PM
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I just don't know what people talk about now days i feel like its harder to relate to people now and I'm too quiet anyways. People just seem to enjoy the little things in life and I don't. I'm just always bored and feel like I have done everything a million times.
PC specs

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post 1610982091 07-18-2020, 01:41 PM
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I'm just super introverted and don't know how to change it. Like I can feel ok for a while and then just randomly need to isolate. I can never stay in a normal mood. Its not like manic or anything I just either feel meh or get annoyed and need to isolate.
PC specs

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post 1611085261 07-19-2020, 05:48 PM
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Going through some horrible low moods today. At this moment I feel kinda okay but for about 2 hours straight I had the worst low mood out of nowhere. It just knocks the wind out of me & I literally can’t do anything. Why couldn’t my brain MRI show what was wrong with me. This **** just sucks living like this.
post 1611085891 07-19-2020, 05:57 PM
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Originally Posted By BigTimePlayer⏩
Going through some horrible low moods today. At this moment I feel kinda okay but for about 2 hours straight I had the worst low mood out of nowhere. It just knocks the wind out of me & I literally can’t do anything. Why couldn’t my brain MRI show what was wrong with me. This **** just sucks living like this.
Same

I still think this is the bodies response to perpetual loneliness. There are certain needs that need to be met or you fall into deep depression.
PC specs

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If you aren't getting stronger you aren't getting bigger crew
post 1611090151 07-19-2020, 06:52 PM
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Originally Posted By eod8989⏩
Same

I still think this is the bodies response to perpetual loneliness. There are certain needs that need to be met or you fall into deep depression.
I’m just mad tired man. I don’t want to do this much longer. I don’t know how much I’m supposed to take living like this.
post 1611091831 07-19-2020, 07:12 PM
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#7875
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Originally Posted By BigTimePlayer⏩
I’m just mad tired man. I don’t want to do this much longer. I don’t know how much I’m supposed to take living like this.
Same man

What really depresses me is ppl don't seem to care about anything anymore and ppl are just in there own little worlds now days plus all of this political crap makes every conversation heated. Its just stupid at this point
PC specs

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If you aren't getting stronger you aren't getting bigger crew
post 1611092221 07-19-2020, 07:17 PM
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Nobody ever cares about what I say or anything anyways so what is the point. I've been socially rejected so many times my brain has just put up a defense against people. Cuz I know how they are going to react. But I cant meet anyone cool anymore
PC specs

i9 9900k/AMD RX 6800 16 GB/16 GB RAM/LG BX 65'' OLED/Gigabyte GS27QC 27''



OLED Master Race crew
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If you aren't getting stronger you aren't getting bigger crew
post 1611105111 07-19-2020, 10:10 PM
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Originally Posted By eod8989⏩
Same man

What really depresses me is ppl don't seem to care about anything anymore and ppl are just in there own little worlds now days plus all of this political crap makes every conversation heated. Its just stupid at this point
Yeah, it sucks. It just feels impossible to meet people anymore. When covid is over with I really need to try to make some changes. I don’t want to go through my entire life like this.
post 1611112881 07-20-2020, 01:10 AM
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I'm cripplingly depressed, it's like my brain is screaming as loud as it can 24/7, holding it together pretty well on the outside, I seem cheery if anything.

No danger of me doing anything to myself. As far as self harm goes, there's always been enough people willing to fuk me up for me to see that as pointless. And beyond the whole suicide is for cowards thing I'd never put my family through that so there's multiple layers taking that off the table.

Still just wish it would stop. If I have a really good exercise session it's sort of neutral for a few hours, but it's never the other way. Seriously can't remember the last time I was happy. But I have to really push it so I need a couple of rest days after where it all comes back.

All for the honorable death option though. If a war I thought was worth it and had enough of a connection to kicked off tomorrow I'd be straight on the front lines. Or a granny was getting mugged and there was a good chance of me getting shanked jumping in. No fukking luck though.

Anyway, it's good to vent. Kept this to myself for at least a decade.
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post 1611162521 07-20-2020, 02:46 PM
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Does anyone else feel like they have no emotion anymore? Sometimes I feel like I’m a sociopath or something where I just have no emotion or care about anything at all anymore. It’s just really scary how far my life has gone downhill. Nothing ever changes. No matter what I’ve tried it just never fixed anything in any way for me. Even going to the gym & having a 90 minute workout would only temporarily help than I’m back to feeling awful most of the time soon after.
post 1611163601 07-20-2020, 02:56 PM
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#7880
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Originally Posted By BigTimePlayer⏩
Does anyone else feel like they have no emotion anymore? Sometimes I feel like I’m a sociopath or something where I just have no emotion or care about anything at all anymore. It’s just really scary how far my life has gone downhill. Nothing ever changes. No matter what I’ve tried it just never fixed anything in any way for me. Even going to the gym & having a 90 minute workout would only temporarily help than I’m back to feeling awful most of the time soon after.
Same, no emotion whatsoever unless it's something i really like to do. Life is just boring man. I'm surprised more people aren't clinically depressed slaving away at work. But most people are social and seem to make friends easily so it makes life more bearable. Being an introvert and slaving away with no friends is just terrible man.

I crash so many times during the day and feel like crying from the pure boredom of work and not having anyone to talk to.

Nothing ever happens man. Every day is the same thing for me because i don't have people to talk to and do things with.
PC specs

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OLED Master Race crew
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If you aren't getting stronger you aren't getting bigger crew
post 1611363841 07-22-2020, 01:48 PM
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#7881
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I just dont know what you're supposed to do if you are a quiet guy with no friends already. I dont relate to anyone anymore or this culture. There's just nothing to talk about unless you have a social life or kids when you get older
PC specs

i9 9900k/AMD RX 6800 16 GB/16 GB RAM/LG BX 65'' OLED/Gigabyte GS27QC 27''



OLED Master Race crew
1440p 120+ fps only crew
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German crew
If you aren't getting stronger you aren't getting bigger crew
post 1611392251 07-22-2020, 06:58 PM
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So tired of the mood changes throughout the days. One hour I just want to be dead than next hour I’m somewhat okay. Than rinse repeat the same ****. Some days I just genuinely pray to die at this point. My life is just going by without me even being able to enjoy it.
post 1611432421 07-23-2020, 07:42 AM
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Just broke down at work. Probably about to leave again. There's just no way to cope when this is all there is to life. Its impossible to meet anyone these days and I'm not being friends with people twice my age or degenerates.
PC specs

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post 1611434021 07-23-2020, 08:01 AM
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I'm mentally exhausted almost every day. Sometimes crashing down at random times.At this point it's becoming really hard to do anything
post 1611435421 07-23-2020, 08:18 AM
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Originally Posted By jecer⏩
I'm mentally exhausted almost every day. Sometimes crashing down at random times.At this point it's becoming really hard to do anything
Same man. I only like to do things i'm passionate about which is listen to metal or chase storms or maybe lift some days. It's hard for me to do old things i used to do like play video games, work etc.
PC specs

i9 9900k/AMD RX 6800 16 GB/16 GB RAM/LG BX 65'' OLED/Gigabyte GS27QC 27''



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German crew
If you aren't getting stronger you aren't getting bigger crew
post 1611465391 07-23-2020, 01:24 PM
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Another day where all I can do is wait until the low moods & low energy go away. How is this living a life? Am I supposed to just accept that this is my life the rest of my days? Not sure what to do anymore. My life is just a waste being like this.
post 1611476741 07-23-2020, 03:27 PM
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Originally Posted By BigTimePlayer⏩
Another day where all I can do is wait until the low moods & low energy go away. How is this living a life? Am I supposed to just accept that this is my life the rest of my days? Not sure what to do anymore. My life is just a waste being like this.
Exercise. Doesn't make you happy, but it gets you neutral. Spend a few hours on a bag or something.

My left hook's getting better as my depression gets worse.
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post 1611488361 07-23-2020, 06:08 PM
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Originally Posted By BigTimePlayer⏩
Another day where all I can do is wait until the low moods & low energy go away. How is this living a life? Am I supposed to just accept that this is my life the rest of my days? Not sure what to do anymore. My life is just a waste being like this.
Yeah i went to chase storms and lifted today and i felt so much better but now i am depressed again. If you don't have friends to hang out with or get to constantly socialize it's so depressing. The difference between FA's and normal people is they never fall into these moods because they get to socialize constantly. This life is just so depressing man.
PC specs

i9 9900k/AMD RX 6800 16 GB/16 GB RAM/LG BX 65'' OLED/Gigabyte GS27QC 27''



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If you aren't getting stronger you aren't getting bigger crew
post 1611534281 07-24-2020, 09:03 AM
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Idk brahs

I just feel like there's no hope for a better future. I've been depressed before but I always was able to put in hard work and push myself to become someone better or try new things, which ended the depression. It was hard, but I always had something to look forward to at the end of the tunnel, something in the future that was great that kept me going.

But now I don't have anything. I want to push myself and try new thing but I can't keep going. I don't see a purpose, there's no better future that I look forward to. What's the point anymore?

Why am I like this now? Before I always pushed myself out of tough situations because I worked hard and persevered because there was hope, but there's no hope for a better future, I can't seem to see what's so good about my future. srs brahs
post 1611562281 07-24-2020, 02:40 PM
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Originally Posted By BestLifter⏩
Idk brahs

I just feel like there's no hope for a better future. I've been depressed before but I always was able to put in hard work and push myself to become someone better or try new things, which ended the depression. It was hard, but I always had something to look forward to at the end of the tunnel, something in the future that was great that kept me going.

But now I don't have anything. I want to push myself and try new thing but I can't keep going. I don't see a purpose, there's no better future that I look forward to. What's the point anymore?

Why am I like this now? Before I always pushed myself out of tough situations because I worked hard and persevered because there was hope, but there's no hope for a better future, I can't seem to see what's so good about my future. srs brahs
I think it's important to recognise that that outlook is an incredibly common (almost ubiquitous) symptom of depression rather than being a reasonable appraisal of your situation and future. My depression was very chemical and I would think exactly the same thing, that there's absolutely no hope and no point to trying anymore. Then I found a med that worked (finally) and it just flipped a switch. Suddenly I was hopeful for the future and felt positive about it.

My view of life and existence hasn't changed. I still don't believe in any afterlife and think that when we die that's it. It just doesn't bother me because the med helped with depression.
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