Ded srs

As long as I'm a colorful one that knows swear words, its all good.

Nope, Im a lion, top of the food chain and king of the jungle, chief


Youre a baby gazelle, a retarded one, the weakest of your heard. I would hunt you, eat you from the ass end first and share your flesh with my harem of lionesses

shutup goofball u post too much. take a break

Alright dad

Brah you’ve been miscing too much lately. Take a break from dropping heater threads and go walk or lift or read or something productive

Fuark wizarded^^

Why not both

I used to masturbate onto birds at a local park. Not a thing that I'm particularly proud of but I became quite good at it. I was taking zinc supplements so I was shooting massive loads and it became something of a sport to me. For anyone interested here is your best strategy. first, you need to find an isolated spot so you don't become a sex offender. I found a short kind of channel area where I saw the pigeons would congregate. Next, you arouse yourself. I was usually content with envisioning the occasional jogging lady coming over and taking a **** on my chest and that was enough to fuel the fire but if you're not as sexually charged as me just take some porn on the go. After you're good an horny, you get some bread. My pigeons preferred white bread but healthier birds might have a taste for honey wheat or maybe even multigrain. Fat, unhealthy birds are slower and easier to hit so remember that. Once you are seated on the bench and ready to do the deed, whip your roosevelt out and scatter bread out within a few feet of you. use your judgement based on how far you know you can cum. I was a lonely and depraved soul who could hit targets the size of a thimble at distances up to 4 feet. You wait for the pigeons to begin eating and to get comfortable with your presence. At this point, you want to coo gently and talk sensually to them to gain their trust. Now you're finally ready to cum on your bird. This is a tough part because the rapid motion of masturbation is very frightening to the birds, so you have to be subtle. Once you master a technique, you simply wind it up and let it go, aiming depending on your past cumming experiences. I always came high so I would aim for the neck of the bird and catch it right in the face. It's an extremely satisfying and erotic feeling, seeing those birds reel around covered in cum and maybe even transporting it to other places in the city. Either way I haven't done it in years but every now and then I catch myself gazing wistfully at a flock of birds, cock throbbing and waiting for them to land close to me.

Seems like a good life brah.

Lmao very impressive

dafuq this dude just called me a parrot? You can't just go around calling a man a parrot there's gonna be some consequences

Pull up brah, just be prepared.

Youre all parrots

The fuk you just say to me?

**Takes off earings**

you just reminded me of an old gif from like 5 years ago of miscers trying to get a parrot to land on their shoulder.

Made me lol HARD

was not expecting brad in that

The fuk you just say to me?