Did you overcome them, and how?

If not, do you regret giving up on them?



Career related drive is in the gutter right now, rapes and gratitude for inspiration.

your ambition is like a fire that cannot be diminished.

if your ambition was put out, that means you are a weak male. nature doesn't want you to reproduce.

249 posts in 16 days, glad to see your fire is shining bright.

Never been happier since I stopped worrying about climbing the ladder. Wish I'd done it way sooner tbh.

Wanted to be an astronaut,but I’m afraid of heights . Feels bad bruhs

I 100% agree with you, I'd never climb the corporate ladder. My case isn't really about climbing the ladder though: I had desires to bring about change in my field and now I just want to coast and take my drive to my hobbies. Not sure what's causing this and whether I'll regret it or not if I decide to let go of it.
AVI does not compute with comment??

Yeah I always felt aimless and never knew what I wanted to do. Have had a comfortable job for the last 9 years and while it's more or less a dead end job, it's basically stress free and I have a decent amount of freedom. It's given me a lot of time to think about my next move.

Same here brehdy. I'm kind of already on a path that will improve over time if I just stick around and do the right thing, but it is not necessarily my driving force for existence. More interested in modest travel, physical recreation and my impact on the local community.

Fark,I forgot about that lol

Religion. I had lots of opportunities to nurture my talent in school. Unfortunately extracurricular activities were out of the question for me.

Women
Fear of debt
Self doubt

Never joined the military when I was younger. Always sorta wanted to just to serve and also to gain some perspective. Have had a good life relatively speaking, but it's one thing I cannot do now that I do wish I would have done before. If I could do it all over I'd go into the military earlier in life and then see what happened after.

when i realized mgmt doesn't care about work loads and everyone's lazy. i stopped giving a fuk when they started getting promotions and slacking off. srs.

Not “playing” the office politics game.
I didn’t realize until way later how important playing this game is in some organizations.

Jfl @ the last sentence.. I literally get pissed if someone wants me to do work.

I have a chit attitude and have never felt so unmotivated man.

I was more content working retail in my younger years.

Op, I don’t have any recommendations, sorry bud.

As for the question in the OP. I think for me it was the realization of how much the whole 'moving up' thing is really out of your own ability to control. They like to dangle the carrot of a high paying, high status position in front of everyone to keep you running on the hamster wheel but the reality is that there are very few of those positions available and when you start to understand how those people got into them you realize how little your day to day performance really has to do with it

You're way better off channeling that energy towards thinking about how to make money in other ways than worrying about something that's not likely to materialize no matter what you do imo.

Simpler times, not knowing and being content is probably a blessing in disguise. Is your next move going to bring you more than staying at your current job?

Mirin sig btw, I help my friend collect some every now and then. Biggest piece I've seen was a two pounder on this huge yellow birch.Hehe, I'm looking at a power company position, but govt job is on the list if I choose to go down the coasting path. I agree, though, being lazy and sedentary is depressive for me as well. Most of my free time is spent doing something.

My career is far from boring, personally, it's something that I would more or less do even if I was retired tomorrow.Nice brah, that's what I mean really. I no longer have career oriented drive, or mostly I'm iffy about it, but I want to take 100% of my energy into my hobbies and whatnot. When did you stop being interested in your work?Interesting, yeah consulting and freelancing is something I looked at. Might spark that up again.Nothing gets past the kid

****ing hell I type up a long response and got some error message when I tried to submit. Trying again..

What killed my drive was working most of my career at jobs where I could tell hard work did not bring any real rewards. You would think the guy on the team who works his ass off, getting a lot of work done, cooperating with others and helping them get their work done, making money for the company, being efficient, etc. would bring rewards my way. At the end of the day if you fashion yourself as a workhorse then you will be the workhorse and management has no incentive to really give you the raises, promotions, and special considerations you rightfully deserve; you will get the same as everyone else. Unless of course you are personal friends with management or are a yes man and will do whatever they tell you. As long as you make them look good and feel good, you'll get promoted and compensated. Personally I can't do that ****. It's unscrupulous and the whole climate it brings is demoralizing.

So now I'm in a spot where I am getting a swift kick in the ass to follow what I'm passionate about; what makes me happy. I can't help but think about the hospice care nurse who wrote a book ~10 years ago. Her story was that almost all of her hospice care patients would open up to her when they were on their death bed, revealing their regrets in life. She noticed quickly that all the terminal patients had about the same regrets:
-I wish I spent more time with my family
-I wish I had the courage to follow my dreams
-I wish I didn't put my job/work ahead of the things that really mattered
-I missed the boat on so many things in life because I was too worried about collecting my paycheck and climbing the corporate ladder

We only live once. If you devote yourself to a job full-steam, then contract a terminal illness and die, your employer will begin looking for your replacement before your body is cold. I have seen this happen a couple times. History has shown to favor the bold, so you have to ignore the voice telling you to play it safe. For me, playing it safe is what led to me being miserable.

I wanna move on from making 150k to making 100k on my own but living 6 months in Mexico and 6 months in Thailand. I'll lose out on the corporate ladder and skills but i'll win on sluts and lifestyle and other sunks costs of being married to a 35 year old toxic thing that will put in 10 pounds eery year with a 50% change of divorce.

Sadly the corporate game doesn't provide the rewards it once did. My parents got opporuntities to live and work overseas my dad lived in Russia for years, Poland for years, Asia for years, France for 5 years. Those opporunities through companies rarely exist now. Its those expat opportunities where to built an exciting life like my dad did.

Now you have to do it on your own.

Having kids

Burnt through my twenties wanting to be “the best chef in the world”

Still remember when I was the youngest cook at a 2michelin star restaurant, set up the path to do it. Bought a one way ticket to Paris and walked into every 3 Michelin star restaurant trying to get foot in door. Then every 2 Michelin star until I found one after weeks of searching and started slaving away from 9am - 11pm with maybe a 1-3 hour break during mid day.

Missed my girlfriend of 3 years and ended up moving back to the states after several months. Moved again because I told her we would if I didn’t get promoted to sous chef within a year at the two star restaurant I returned to, they offered me the position when I told them I was leaving but kind of too late at that point.

In Portland we got married, and I finally got my foot in at a world class restaurant there where every other cook had 3 Michelin star experience, food was world class, multiple people had come through moms, mugaritz, el bulli type stuff. Got my wife pregnant and just realized slaving away 80 hour weeks for 27k a year just wasn’t worth it to me and I needed life outside the kitchen. Became disillusioned with ultra high end food. It seemed mastabatory, chefs seem more interested in showing off how amazing they were, how they could find the rarest ingredients, manipulate them in the hardest way possible, present works of art... but lost sight of just making the customers happy with a hot plate of delicious food. No longer cared about being the best.

Moved again back to home town too have kids, was able to open up my own restaurant finally but I just do simple caveman cooking over wood fire. “Fine dining comfort food”. My restaurant is very successfull, but I don’t put everything I have into it anymore. I just want my employees and my customers to be happy while I work as little as possible, I enjoy my time with my boys, take nights off to cook at home regularly, coach little league, bjj is more a priority to me then my food, skiing is more important to me. Time for myself and family.

Couldn’t give two ****s about being “the best chef in the world” anymore. Just want people to enjoy what I do.

Things that killed my ambition was just the constant stress from the job in this toxic company. Been here 1.5 years and already been through 3 big organizations change (with our directors, execs, layoffs). End of this year I’ll be looking for another career at a different company.

Before working here I had pretty solid ambition in terms of learning new technology, coding, etc. now after I finish my 9-5 my brain is fried and I want nothing to do with technology. Also WFH has made me lazier, admittedly.

Job is system engineer for those wondering.

Its inherent in most organizations that they have a hierarchical structure. As you move up there are fewer chairs and people are competing harder for them. Your ability, stress tolerance, and desire to compete gets tested every level.

Ive seen it where peoples career arc take them a level further than they should have and its almost always painful. Some people just need a peek of that next role before stepping back, some people keep swinging for years before they either burn out or get removed. Ego gets in the way.

You get really tired punching above your weight, Im considering a change like this myself some days.

Lack of superior genetics to be a pro athlete. Baseball, football, WWE

yup. i just became director in a top 3 realty firm.

typing from my office with more free time now.


thanks for reminding me.

feels good man

This ^.

People dont realize till they are older that its a pyramid. As you go up there is lots of competition for fewer jobs.

You have to sell yourself out and give up your life to be what they want you to be. Eventually you will realize its all a lie.

Fuark that's brutal. I met a religious guy like that, he didn't seem very happy, even though he talked like he was. Hope you found something you're content with brah.Oh yeah bad women will drag you all the way down if you let 'em. Hope you worked out your other hurdles.I don't really regret not joining the military, but I also would love to go back and try it out. Also a little too old for it now. Oh well, maybe in the next life.This is a recurring theme I have noticed amongst large companies. Honestly I've been lucky so far with my jobs and they actually reward hard work and initiative, so I can't really relate, but I'd be demoralized and looking for a way out, or at the very least slack off, if I was in an environment like that.Yeah I was actually surprised at how prevalent this is in large organizations and the red tape that comes with it. Some people are naturals at it though, do you regret it?All good, it's always nice to hear other's perspective as well. When did you start feeling like that?This is good advice, ladder climbing monkeys take notes.Brutal realization that a lot of career oriented people face is how prevalent nepotism is. I think this applies in all industries if the company is large enough. As I wrote earlier, I've been lucky that so far my bosses have seen my value and gave me the upward mobility I deserve with no ass kissing involved. I guess perks of being a technician/tradie in small-midsized companies.

Also good advice for the ladder climbing monkeys, the part about the regrets is a good addition.If you have that chance to make 100k while living 6 months abroad, I'd take it 10/10. 50k is peanuts in terms of quality of life, as long as you aren't a materialist person.I liked the idea of working overseas on contracts, but with the covid things have gotten complicated and I have no idea what that will look like in the near future.

I like the bit about "Just want people to enjoy what I do". This can translate to my career, thanks for typing all that out. Good to hear this type of story.Yeah stress is a son of a bitch, I hope you find something else quickly. I can relate on the WFH part, I'm a full time student and I think the fact that classes are online is a big contribution of what killed my motivation to continue. Also realizing just how much red tape I'm going to have to deal with if I go through with it. I'm getting tired of the material and this has never happened before, I love my line of work.I've seen it first hand with my dad, he dug himself an early grave because of the constant and prolonged energy he put into his work. If you're considering a change, I think you should do what's best for you.Good for you if srs.Agreed, there seems to be many people with regrets related to this.

In my line of work (finance/accounting) the higher up I go, the more I have to deal with people and their idiotic personalities..... I've decided I don't want to advance any further.

I'm gonna ride this finance thing out a few more years and then transition into an easier line of work.

The bolded is partly why I'm feeling this way as well. I work in forestry/urban forestry, and the higher the position, the more red tape and politics are involved. I was expecting some, but was surprised when I found out just how much of the day-to-day consists of that.

I guess this is common in every field, but it's not really what I signed up for.

Got to do what's best for you brah, may you find a better suited line of work.