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» Do you get depressed if no women? [sexless] [serious tag] [dating] [advice]
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post 1635919473 04-10-2021, 10:26 PM
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Do you get depressed if no women? [sexless] [serious tag] [dating] [advice]

Over the last 2 years I've only slept with 5 girls. Prior to that I was in a relationship with a good women.

I've been on dating applications however most women I match with are bad. I don't have high standards but most are ugly, overweight, or transvestites.

Sometimes I feel lonely but other times I feel ok. I miss having sex with an attractive girl and/or having a relationship.

Is there a better way to cope?

I'm average/ugly so don't have many options.
post 1635919833 04-10-2021, 10:34 PM
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bump
post 1635920123 04-10-2021, 10:42 PM
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The dating scene where I currently live is an absolute nightmare. But I don't get depressed because of no women, it's more that the general vibe is off. However it would be nice to get some guaranteed(or have pick up bars) where you knew with certainty it could happen any night. But I just travel to places that have it when I really am in a slump.
post 1635920303 04-10-2021, 10:45 PM
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Originally Posted By OliverHeldens
The dating scene where I currently live is an absolute nightmare. But I don't get depressed because of no women, it's more that the general vibe is off. However it would be nice to get some guaranteed(or have pick up bars) where you knew with certainty it could happen any night. But I just travel to places that have it when I really am in a slump.
I feel the same way,

But it's been such a long time since I had anything good with a women.
post 1635920423 04-10-2021, 10:47 PM
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post 1635920473 04-10-2021, 10:48 PM
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Beta simp minds worry about pulling women, to make it worse, they know this and avoid beta simps.
post 1635920563 04-10-2021, 10:50 PM
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Originally Posted By AlwaysFocus
Beta simp minds worry about pulling women, to make it worse, they know this and avoid beta simps.
well said. Nobody wants someone who is needy.
post 1635921113 04-10-2021, 11:04 PM
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Originally Posted By Silencespeaks
Yes alt brah I get depressed if no man.

Other people always tell me you have to be happy with yourself first and you can be happy being alone and you are complete by yourself etc but I disagree.

Imo male companionship and sex is a fundamental need and I won’t ever feel genuinely complete or content without a man.
Originally Posted By AlwaysFocus
Beta simp minds worry about pulling women, to make it worse, they know this and avoid beta simps.
This isn't about being a simp. I don't care about pulling women.

It's about what Silencespeaks said. I understand you should be happy on your own, but companionship and sex is a good feeling.
post 1635921503 04-10-2021, 11:15 PM
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I can’t remember the last time I’ve felt lonely.

I’ve been in three long term relationships and was mostly indifferent towards them other than sex. Could take them or leave them. Not too proud of that.

I’m built for the solitary lifestyle although people think I’m an extrovert when in social settings, lol. I have legit ADD and hardly ever get bored with the circus in my head going nonstop 24/7.
post 1635921613 04-10-2021, 11:18 PM
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Originally Posted By Silencespeaks
Yes alt brah I get depressed if no man.

Other people always tell me you have to be happy with yourself first and you can be happy being alone and you are complete by yourself etc but I disagree.

Imo male companionship and sex is a fundamental need and I won’t ever feel genuinely complete or content without a man.
Yup. In real tea, a relationship actually IS fundamental to self-realization & fulfillment at certain times in our lives. It still comes back to you when you’re actually in the relationship & life’s all about your relationship with yourself at the end of the day, but there are certain fundamental needs for people to flourish & fully understand themselves.
post 1635921653 04-10-2021, 11:19 PM
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Originally Posted By andrew28
I can’t remember the last time I’ve felt lonely.

I’ve been in three long term relationships and was mostly indifferent towards them other than sex. Could take them or leave them. Not too proud of that.

I’m built for the solitary lifestyle although people think I’m an extrovert when in social settings, lol. I have legit ADD and hardly ever get bored with the circus in my head going nonstop 24/7.
really? You never feel the need to be with a female, sex ,companionship or any of that?
post 1635922233 04-10-2021, 11:36 PM
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Originally Posted By Strawng
Yup. In real tea, a relationship actually IS fundamental to self-realization & fulfillment at certain times in our lives. It still comes back to you when you’re actually in the relationship & life’s all about your relationship with yourself at the end of the day, but there are certain fundamental needs for people to flourish & fully understand themselves.
How does one cope without companionship or sex?
post 1635922493 04-10-2021, 11:45 PM
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I get depressed from rejection
post 1635922633 04-10-2021, 11:47 PM
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Originally Posted By LargeCondom
really? You never feel the need to be with a female, sex ,companionship or any of that?
I’m on TRT so yea I would be totally down to bang if a girl hit me up. my last fwb lasted 6 months and that was great but she’s moved on and I’m too lazy to put myself out there for another.

As far as companionship, no. i feel no need for it whatsoever. at least not to seek it out. I live in my own head nearly 24/7. I can’t let loose or enjoy vacations. If someone offered me a 2 week free vacation to anywhere on earth, I’d turn it down.
post 1635926373 04-11-2021, 01:53 AM
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Nah.

I got out of a relationship a little over a year ago. All last year I was just smashing 3-4 bishes a month for a week to two weeks at a time. Now I haven't hadn't been with a woman in about 2 months. Really just enjoying my time alone tbh. I'll fap and after the fap I tell myself, yeah good thing I didn't tell a bish to come over. Once that urge of wanting to smash stays after post nut clarity is when I'll go have sex.

If you seriously get depressed because you haven't had sex, look into an escort. Honestly, the feeling of having sex, whether it's paid or not, after a very long dry spell is very energizing.
post 1635926573 04-11-2021, 01:59 AM
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Originally Posted By Schweric
Nah.

I got out of a relationship a little over a year ago. All last year I was just smashing 3-4 bishes a month for a week to two weeks at a time. Now I haven't hadn't been with a woman in about 2 months. Really just enjoying my time alone tbh. I'll fap and after the fap I tell myself, yeah good thing I didn't tell a bish to come over. Once that urge of wanting to smash stays after post nut clarity is when I'll go have sex.

If you seriously get depressed because you haven't had sex, look into an escort. Honestly, the feeling of having sex, whether it's paid or not, after a very long dry spell is very energizing.
I really miss having good sex. I have seen prostitutes before but it's not quite the same feeling of having sex with a girl (raw) that is actully into you and it's more natural
post 1635926863 04-11-2021, 02:11 AM
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Been legit single my entire life; never dated, kissed or lost virginity. Turning 40 next summer.

Vast majority of the time it doesn't bother me. It's just how it is and I have other things to worry about, focus on etc. At this stage I don't really stand much of a chance with regards to dating (especially given how the market is), so I tend not to invest negativity into this factor of my life.
Cook the man some eggs!
post 1635927253 04-11-2021, 02:27 AM
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Originally Posted By maori-rap
Been legit single my entire life; never dated, kissed or lost virginity. Turning 40 next summer.

Vast majority of the time it doesn't bother me. It's just how it is and I have other things to worry about, focus on etc. At this stage I don't really stand much of a chance with regards to dating (especially given how the market is), so I tend not to invest negativity into this factor of my life.
Are you considering just going monk mode and just try to stay monk til you die?
post 1635927303 04-11-2021, 02:29 AM
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Originally Posted By Celsus
Are you considering just going monk mode and just try to stay monk til you die?
It seems to be the only option now, no consideration involved.
Cook the man some eggs!
post 1635927393 04-11-2021, 02:35 AM
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Originally Posted By maori-rap
It seems to be the only option now, no consideration involved.
I asked because you could have obviously by now hired an escort or a whore, or whatever service available, but since you have not done that, it seems like it's not really the biggest deal in your life for you to lose it
post 1635928003 04-11-2021, 02:56 AM
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Broke up with GF 2 years ago. Haven't smashed since. Talked to a few girls. Honestly don't mind being single. Actually enjoying it. I don't think I want kids either. Plus I feel like dating pool sucks. Nothing but single mothers. Only thing on my mind is retiring already and chilling. Working is for suckers.
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post 1635928243 04-11-2021, 03:04 AM
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As someone who usually goes 2 years without boning between relationships I can say that:
- You will eventually get used to everything if you are generally in the right mind state
- Having friends > having poosay to fight depression
- Soulless indiscriminate feking is far worse for your self worth than not having a bone for a long time and focusing on yourself and getting goals completed
- In most cases, women are a distraction from your goals.
- Im not saying be a focused celibate loner and focus on money, Im saying when you happen to find yourself in a position when you are alone, actively use that time wisely to achieve goals. Girls and poosay will come to you if you have even a half way decent social life with friends.
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I guess its time to start training again.
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post 1635928653 04-11-2021, 03:17 AM
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Had 1 girlfriend and broke up with my fiance not long ago.. Lets just say it only brought my life more downwards.. Invest in yourself then the right time will come.
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post 1635929633 04-11-2021, 03:59 AM
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Don't know, it's nice having female company but more important is the relationship with yourself. Even if you are in a great relationship it is still your own brain/mind experiencing it, you can never become fully intertwined with the other person and become like a merged entity.

I've been reading up on cultivating the island of the self, a Buddhist philosophy. Basically focussing on the breath, the present moment, and your internal state to make you a more stable and solid person who is not looking outside themselves for scraps of pleasure and happiness.

Once you are comfortable in that state then sure, look for other relationships - but see it as more like the cherry on top of an already stable and fulfilled life.
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post 1635929813 04-11-2021, 04:08 AM
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Some days yes but I use it as fuel for the fire. I suggest U do the same
post 1635930703 04-11-2021, 04:57 AM
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Sometimes i get frustrated because i have horrible timing and am not very good with women.

Last summer i was working out outside in the park and there would always be groups of girls around watching.

If i saw a bunch that were being especially blatant i would go over and say hi but i could never seem to get past the high.

So yea, i guess there was a small bit of depression there from not really knowing what i was doing wrong

Other times women would approach me, take me home and we would ****. thats a fun time.

If youre ugly work on that and just practice practice practice. i am very aggressive and that probably scares women off, plus i kinda make my intentions known right from the start which isnt ideal. how are you ugly anyway? is your face deformed?
post 1635930813 04-11-2021, 05:01 AM
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Originally Posted By WiseOldApe
Who says you're doing anything wrong? a convo should be natural and not forced.
well there ya go. if i dont know you its gonna be awkward and forced.

just gotta do it until you get comfortable

one of the best ways i can think of is to imagine shes just a woman. call her bro and man and dude a lot. it bugs them a bit and they start trying to qualify themselves to you
post 1635934093 04-11-2021, 07:10 AM
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i actually do brah. You'll get used to no women very fast and if you have friends it's not really that big of a deal. But lots of sex helps with coping. Had a really good tinder streak for the last 3 months and it really did a lot for me coping and self esteem wise. But being needy is still beta af. When I enter e couple of weeks without a new girl, I feel empty again.
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