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Forum » Dad might be getting dementia. What would you document now before it's too late?
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Thread: Dad might be getting dementia. What would you document now before it's too late?

post 1636322063 04-15-2021, 10:00 PM
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Dad might be getting dementia. What would you document now before it's too late?

I'd like to create a video interview series with him and my mom. Something to document their life experiences before he's no longer able to recall them.

I think it would make a nice sentimental gift for my brothers. It would also be cool to watch in the future.

For those of you who know longer have their parents with them, what are some things you would ask your parents if you could?

Things like how was your childhood? How did you and my mom meet? How did you know you were The One for each other?
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post 1636322383 04-15-2021, 10:08 PM
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Great idea.

lifes short. cherish every moment with your loved ones. Take some time off and spend it with your pa
post 1636322403 04-15-2021, 10:09 PM
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Family history, ancestry, etc.
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post 1636322783 04-15-2021, 10:17 PM
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Originally Posted By TheFitLord⏩
Family history, ancestry, etc.
This, about their grandparents and siblings growing up
Honest history about their youths

Everytime yall hangout you should record something...not for any social media BS but for his own benefit
May help in the future
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post 1636322973 04-15-2021, 10:21 PM
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My father had various levels for dementia before he passed away. I should have visited way more often. I should have been better. I should have accepted my father was very close to death and he wasn't going to live on and on. Whatever problems you have with family, deal with it. Immediately, don't put it off. They'll always be your family. I was around my dad for 4+ months before he passed. It should have been a lot more.
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post 1636323523 04-15-2021, 10:30 PM
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Feels man. My dad had Parkinson's and it definitely zapped him of a lot of his memories and abilities to articulate toward the end.

I can't speak to your situation, but I can speak to mine. I really really wish I'd asked him more about business and career advice. He was extremely successful and I'm in the middle of opening a business with a ton of questions I'd love to have asked him. I also wish I'd asked him more about his experience as a father when we were young. I feel like I'm going through a lot of the parenting stuff without any point of reference for how he did it.
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post 1636324953 04-15-2021, 11:00 PM
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Originally Posted By aal04⏩
Great idea.

lifes short. cherish every moment with your loved ones. Take some time off and spend it with your pa
That's the intention. I'd just like to have some meaningful footage when he's no longer with us. Same goes for my mom. Even tho she's healthy, they're both in their mid-70s.
Originally Posted By TheFitLord⏩
Family history, ancestry, etc.
Thanks
Originally Posted By AK1615⏩
This, about their grandparents and siblings growing up
Honest history about their youths

Everytime yall hangout you should record something...not for any social media BS but for his own benefit
May help in the future
That's a GREAT idea with the recording more. I appreciate it.
Originally Posted By Casca⏩
My father had various levels for dementia before he passed away. I should have visited way more often. I should have been better. I should have accepted my father was very close to death and he wasn't going to live on and on. Whatever problems you have with family, deal with it. Immediately, don't put it off. They'll always be your family. I was around my dad for 4+ months before he passed. It should have been a lot more.
Sorry to hear that bro. I hope you find peace soon. This is exactly what I'm trying to avoid. I'm just trying to make the best of it.
Originally Posted By LinuxJon⏩
Feels man. My dad has Parkinson's and it definitely zapped him of a lot of his memories and abilities to articulate toward the end.

I can't speak to your situation, but I can speak to mine. I really really wish I'd asked him more about business and career advice. He was extremely successful and I'm in the middle of opening a business with a ton of questions I'd love to have asked him. I also wish I'd asked him more about his experience as a father when we were young. I feel like I'm going through a lot of the parenting stuff without any point of reference for how he did it.
That's why I asked for those who have been through it. Hindsight is 20/20. Thanks for sharing.
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post 1636325063 04-15-2021, 11:01 PM
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Great and thoughtful idea.

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post 1636325663 04-15-2021, 11:12 PM
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Lost my mother in early December. She suffered from Dementia among other things. My father is still living, but also suffers from Dementia. It’s a hard thing to go through and you never see it coming until it’s staring you in the face.
post 1636325823 04-15-2021, 11:16 PM
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Favorite stories. Biggest adventures, favorite trips, etc

I live 1500 miles from where I grew up. After I moved, I would only get to see my grandparents once a year when I'd visit. The second to last time I ever saw my grandpa he pulled out his old WW2 memory book and showed it to me. We spent a couple hours going through that book and him telling stories about the photos. I feel blessed I was able to do that with him.
post 1636326313 04-15-2021, 11:26 PM
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Some kind of organization of his life so he can function while impaired.
post 1636327243 04-15-2021, 11:52 PM
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Op “dad i would like to film and interview you”

Dad “ lol, why?”

Op “i think you have dementia and will soon no longer be with us”

Dad “not like this...”

Op “what?”

Dad “not like this...”

Op “what?”

Dad “im quoting Switch from The Matrix movie. You want to do a gay ass interview?”

Op “yes, it would make a nice sentimental gift to my brothers”

Dad “we saving private Ryan now?”

Op “what?”

Dad “ok ill do it, what else do you want me to do? How about you embalm me after i die, so you can keep me around for sentimental reasons?”

Op “what?”

Dad “say what one more time?”

Op “you are quoting pulp fiction arent you?”

Dad “ yes, you idiot and i am not doing this interview, wtf are you going to ask me anyway? Stuff like when did i meet your mom and when was the first time i jacked off to porn? What do you want to hear? That your mother was a right horny slut back in the day always gagging for cock? Id take her on holiday and bang her all the time - hard. I don't know what it is but you'll find girls just seem to let themselves go a bit more on holiday. It's like as soon as they smell the suncream they get wet. Your mother's the same, even now. “

Op “fuc you!”
post 1636390763 04-16-2021, 07:43 PM
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Not to be morbid, but make sure he has everything in place to assist him later in life as well. That can include assisted suicide. It's a hard conversation to have, but if I knew ahead of time I was going to lose all my memories and be a burden on my family, that would be my choice. But you can't make the decision afterwards and it requires a living will.
post 1636390963 04-16-2021, 07:47 PM
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Originally Posted By Torero20⏩
I'd like to create a video interview series with him and my mom. Something to document their life experiences before he's no longer able to recall them.

I think it would make a nice sentimental gift for my brothers. It would also be cool to watch in the future.

For those of you who know longer have their parents with them, what are some things you would ask your parents if you could?

Things like how was your childhood? How did you and my mom meet? How did you know you were The One for each other?
Just talk to them bro, they will talk about what they want to talk about. No need to delve into their happier days if they don't want to talk about it. I'm sorry that's happening.
post 1636391683 04-16-2021, 07:57 PM
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Another point- sort yourself out, at least with a rough backup, before anything happens.

My dad fell apart, and it disrupted what I could do. Stay on top of things yourself.
post 1636391723 04-16-2021, 07:58 PM
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Bank accounts, hidden investments (think Crypto or oversea accounts), etc etc.
post 1636393403 04-16-2021, 08:29 PM
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I'm pretty sure coconut oil has been shown to reverse that, or at least help.

Look into it.
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post 1636393803 04-16-2021, 08:36 PM
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Originally Posted By TheFitLord⏩
Family history, ancestry, etc.
This is actually really important, ask about who had cancer, what kind, who died early, allergies, diseases etc. Sounds kind of ghoulish but old people love talking about this stuff. When you age this genetic history is invaluable to Dr's that are treating you.
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post 1636393853 04-16-2021, 08:38 PM
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Just spend as much time with them now as possible and document the good times. Pretty simple bro not sure why you’re asking the Misc
post 1636393953 04-16-2021, 08:41 PM
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Originally Posted By nickh04⏩
Great and thoughtful idea.

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