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Forum » Investment bros, advice for noob?
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Thread: Investment bros, advice for noob?

post 1641551683 06-24-2021, 04:00 PM
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  1. kusok
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Investment bros, advice for noob?

I’m a noob investor. I’m looking to start investing maybe starting with 20g that’s currently sitting in one bank account doing nothing for me. I do have plenty of emergency funds and no debt, no mortgage or car payments or student loans or rent, nothing. What would you advice I do? Tesla? Apple? NIO? Amazon? Just get some RobinHood account and start?


Stats:
Investor level: noob
Care if lose a few g: none
Care if make a few g: happy!
Debt level: none
Goal: withdraw a few g every now and then when make money to buy myself cool sheit I want, But leave most of it invested and add to it overtime.
post 1641552093 06-24-2021, 04:06 PM
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  1. kusok
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Originally Posted By topperstyle⏩
Don’t get into options
Tha f*ck is that? (Frantically googling)


Edit:
Even after googling I have NO idea what “options” means in context of investing.
post 1641552213 06-24-2021, 04:09 PM
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weed stocks.

CRLBF, TCNNF
post 1641552253 06-24-2021, 04:09 PM
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  1. hendrixfreak70
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Buy low, sell super high.


Now give me 5% of whatever you make.
post 1641552353 06-24-2021, 04:10 PM
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  1. Destor
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Throwing some money into an ETF or an index can be a good way to learn right off the bat
post 1641552403 06-24-2021, 04:11 PM
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If srs thread:

https://www.bogleheads.org/wiki/Getting_started
Best lifts:
Bench press: 315x5
Squat: 465x1
Strict press: 205x5
Deadlift: 405x13 (conv tap'n'go with straps)
post 1641552423 06-24-2021, 04:11 PM
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dogecoin











































not srs
post 1641552743 06-24-2021, 04:17 PM
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Lately I've been hearing about this new thing called "cryptocurrencies"
post 1641552813 06-24-2021, 04:17 PM
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#9
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buy high sell low
post 1641552903 06-24-2021, 04:19 PM
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Ponzicoins
post 1641553203 06-24-2021, 04:26 PM
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1) If you want to make money - buy some SNP etf and wait. 100% win in a 20 yr rolling period. Max out IRA every year and all that pussy ****.

2) If you want to have fun and be a degenerate and lose money - yolo OTM options.


People with robinhood accounts eventually find their way to option 2.
post 1641553433 06-24-2021, 04:31 PM
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Read
1. Little book of common sense investing
2. Do free stock course from Sven Carlin

That’s enough for the average dude like yourself
post 1641555983 06-24-2021, 05:14 PM
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#13
  1. OT2000
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Long term hold? Plenty of great choices that I won’t recommend to you. Do some research bro and don’t look for the easy money until you know what you’re doing.
I probably banged your mom.

Eat the whole animal like a real man.
post 1641556113 06-24-2021, 05:17 PM
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Learn how to read a chart, it's hard to know when to buy or sell if you cant read a chart.
I: Self, Lord and Master.

"I rub my hands when my palms itch."

"I call you Son not because you Shine but because you Mine."
post 1641556273 06-24-2021, 05:21 PM
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buy vanguard s&p 500 etf and don't touch it

I recommend fidelity.

There is a difference between investing and gambling. This is a safe long term investment that can get you real, decent returns with minimal risk. If you want great returns, then you have to start gambling.
post 1641558673 06-24-2021, 05:57 PM
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Originally Posted By topperstyle⏩
Don’t get into options
How else is he going to make those 1000% gains in a week?

Weeklies and nothing else. Lol

But in reality op, if you are just getting started dump some money into spy, then research a company that you believe in and invest in it.

I just bought 200 shares of celsius energy drink. Every white girl out there drinks that thing pre workout
♂Nice Ass Crew♀

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
I rape back (if you ask me to :P)
post 1641558983 06-24-2021, 06:03 PM
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Buying and holding mega-cap index funds is one of the most effective ways to make money in stocks and by far the easiest.

The option chit is interesting, but it is legit gambling. I keep a fuk-around account open to just to entertain myself during WFH, but I lose every dollar I win if not more.
FA Crew
Always Pick 1 Crew

"Experience is something you get right after you need it."
post 1641559133 06-24-2021, 06:06 PM
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If you're a real noob forget about investing into single stocks and derivatives. Broad indexes all the way. Look for low expense ratios.
post 1641559603 06-24-2021, 06:14 PM
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  1. NealIRC
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Originally Posted By Destor⏩
Throwing some money into an ETF or an index can be a good way to learn right off the bat
Examples?
Originally Posted By EasternHammer⏩
If you're a real noob forget about investing into single stocks and derivatives. Broad indexes all the way. Look for low expense ratios.
Examples?
Never send a Christian lawyer to go after a Jewish judge.

Women explained: http://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=153559281

Added 2024: I am the forum incel. Feel free to msg me about my incel life or about Chicago's crime / liberal government.
post 1641560453 06-24-2021, 06:27 PM
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Originally Posted By wincel⏩
buy vanguard s&p 500 etf and don't touch it

I recommend fidelity.

There is a difference between investing and gambling. This is a safe long term investment that can get you real, decent returns with minimal risk. If you want great returns, then you have to start gambling.
Lol.

You are an investor?

I find this hard to fathom.
I: Self, Lord and Master.

"I rub my hands when my palms itch."

"I call you Son not because you Shine but because you Mine."
post 1641560833 06-24-2021, 06:34 PM
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#21
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Originally Posted By NealIRC⏩
Examples?

Examples?
Just buy the tickers SPY and QQQ.
FA Crew
Always Pick 1 Crew

"Experience is something you get right after you need it."
post 1641560973 06-24-2021, 06:36 PM
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#22
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Originally Posted By wincel⏩
buy vanguard s&p 500 etf and don't touch it

I recommend fidelity.

There is a difference between investing and gambling. This is a safe long term investment that can get you real, decent returns with minimal risk. If you want great returns, then you have to start gambling.
This as some others have mentioned too
post 1641561153 06-24-2021, 06:38 PM
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#23
  1. ProteinEnough
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Originally Posted By kusok⏩
I’m a noob investor. I’m looking to start investing maybe starting with 20g that’s currently sitting in one bank account doing nothing for me. I do have plenty of emergency funds and no debt, no mortgage or car payments or student loans or rent, nothing. What would you advice I do? Tesla? Apple? NIO? Amazon? Just get some RobinHood account and start?


Stats:
Investor level: noob
Care if lose a few g: none
Care if make a few g: happy!
Debt level: none
Goal: withdraw a few g every now and then when make money to buy myself cool sheit I want, But leave most of it invested and add to it overtime.
Do you want serious advice?
post 1641563053 06-24-2021, 07:17 PM
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#24
  1. NealIRC
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Originally Posted By ProteinEnough⏩
Do you want serious advice?
Sure.
Never send a Christian lawyer to go after a Jewish judge.

Women explained: http://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=153559281

Added 2024: I am the forum incel. Feel free to msg me about my incel life or about Chicago's crime / liberal government.
post 1641583103 06-25-2021, 05:42 AM
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#25
  1. MLDK
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Want a quick read that covers some of the basics? This is great. Be warned, internet arguments about investing (and everything else) get intense.



https://www.amazon.com/Bogleheads-Gu...dp/1119487331/
post 1641583283 06-25-2021, 05:49 AM
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#26
  1. UknowWho11
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just send me the money, you'll eventually loose it all anyway
"If not me, then who? If not now, then when?"

On the road to CEO 50k/month

1989-2011 Forever mirin'

*HTC crew* *Married crew*
post 1641583403 06-25-2021, 05:53 AM
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#27
  1. SoutheastBeast1
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Take no chances (No chances)
Stop freelancin' (Right now)
Invest in your future
Don't dilute your finances (Uh huh)

401K, make sure it's low risk
Then get some real estate (How much?)
4.2% 30-year mortgage
That's important, that's a great deal
And if you can't afford it
Don't forge it on your last bill

Renting is for suckers right now
A dependable savings
And you'll retire with money in your account
Beast
"One day I won't be able to lift any more. Not I won't want to lift. I mean physically unable. That day could be decades from now or it could be tomorrow. All I know is that's the day I'll wish I could lift more than ever. The day I'd give anything for one more workout, one more set, or one more cardio session. So go hard and enjoy every workout, every set, every rep. Because one day you will wake up and you will never get it back."
-SoutheastBeast1
post 1641583903 06-25-2021, 06:07 AM
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#28
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Timing is everything. Wait for the next crash; be quick. Don't fret about not picking the bottom.
Nocrew crew

SS final perma ban request
https://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=184614323
post 1641583983 06-25-2021, 06:08 AM
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#29
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TLT/thread
the above post is not serious and is for entertainment purposes only.
Thanks for your time.
post 1641584303 06-25-2021, 06:13 AM
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#30
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Always Neg Back Crew.
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