I've been hanging out with a childhood friend a little, girl A, knew her in middle and high school. I had a crush on her back then, but she was actually very fit. Now a days she's a whale and has zero career success/goals, also turned into a total stoner, in the sense of making it a huge percentage of her personality. She seemed depressed, deleting social media accounts all the time. Spent a couple days with her, funded some things, caught up about life, including mutual friends and our families, good conversations it was a good time.

I'm single, happily but I wouldn't mind a FWB I'm actually attracted to. This girl is NOT it. She doesn't stop complimenting me, calling me hot/handsome, sometimes sending heart emojis and chit. I just say thanks or ignore lol. But now I'm worried because I'm just being friendly, she's ABSOLUTELY taking it the wrong way.

Another girl, girl B is someone that has a cute face but is too thicc for me, friended her on Bumble and we've had some great conversations. If she lost like 30 pounds I'd maybe be interested in FWB with her, but I'm just happy she's a cool personality to get to know. I'd never date/relationship her though because she only has a high school education with no career goals it seems.

I'm beginning to think it's evil just to be friendly to girls that you find fairly repulsive and are just being nice or enjoying their personality. Breaking hearts when there was never any intention for anything anyways.

Can't stop thinking about how I'm relating to "Billie Jean" from Michael Jackson on this subject.

"People always told me be careful of what you do
And don't go around breaking young girls' hearts
And mother always told me be careful of who you love
And be careful of what you do 'cause the lie becomes the truth"



Misc what do? Feeling bad for even opening doors just to be social with no motives for something more.

Might have been a decent thread if you posted pics of girl A and B..... ****get

Yeah it's a crappy situation especially when the girl comes on so strongly. It's just fukin awkward which is why girls and guys alike avoid it.

I've never kept a female friend like that, usually because they were too direct and obnoxious. Most the female friends I've had, there was mutually no sexual attraction, or there may have been a little bit but it wasn't stated and permanently left alone (most of the time).

If she has friends you're interested in and you actually like her personality then keep her around. And just throw her a tiny bit of attention here and there.

yeah, it's basically akin to genocide

Not gonna chit all over her like that, plus y'all wanna see ATTRACTIVE women.

A man having a female friend? I would assume that he's gay

just cause shes sending those heart emojis. doesnt mean she wants you in her guts. those are typical girl emojis. if she actually liked you like that. those are the last ones she would be sending. cause she sends those to her close male cousins too.

I'm talking like, hearts in eyes. Says good night handsome. Blow kiss heart emoji. I mean I'd love to agree with you SRS, but I'm having such a hard time with that lol. Also she constantly brings up how we are for sure going to hang out more and "go there" or "do that." I'd kinda rather just be online distant friends LOL.

You kinda lost me here, brah. Guys don't "fund some things" for guy friends, nomsayin. Like you say you don't want to smash, but that's some simpin behavior.

Feels like you're at a 20% on the smash-o-meter with these girls and they're at like a 90%, but you're not at a 0% so I wouldn't try and play it off as platonic.

She's broke/poor and low income so I knew it'd be super cool to her. Plus I wanted an excuse to do a staycation kinda thing. I regret it, but I made the decision to do it while I was drunk, and decided to commit since I knew her when I was a kid. I MOSTLY don't regret doing it, but I wish the boundaries were clear AF. Hoped they'd be clear from my lack of flirting back.

Bump.

Clear boundaries is probably the way to go, even if it's a little brutal.

have you communicated how you feel to those girls. Maybe reset their expectations - put them in the friend zone. Nothing wrong with having women as friends. I've been a musician most of my life and have many female friends that I would never bang but I love playing music with and sometimes hanging out with.