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» FA's, Incels, Bittercels...Do you believe getting a woman will fix your problems?
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post 1668188323 09-20-2022, 01:41 PM
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FA's, Incels, Bittercels...Do you believe getting a woman will fix your problems?

Title.

I saw a miscer post a self pity thread, and noticed some of the replies automatically making it about not having a woman, or telling the OP how to get one.

That also leads me to believe that a lot of men (here and IRL) are basing an unhealthy amount of their self esteem on having a female in their life.


FA's, Incels, Bittercel...Do you believe getting a woman will fix your problems?
post 1668188383 09-20-2022, 01:42 PM
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My family sure thinks it will...
post 1668189343 09-20-2022, 01:59 PM
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Originally Posted By Fewski
My family sure thinks it will...
Damn, that's gotta be annoying. "When are you getting married Fewski...?"
post 1668189623 09-20-2022, 02:06 PM
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Yes, they don't want to do any self development.

My advice to incels and FA's is to start BJJ immediately and watch all social problems fade away. It is the cure for any social awkwardness as there is so much physical close contact with people you don't know and it helps build confidence.

Any FA's and incels reading this go to your nearest BJJ gym/dojo and stop masturbating
post 1668189703 09-20-2022, 02:07 PM
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Originally Posted By milfmanmilk
Any FA's and incels reading this go to your nearest BJJ gym/dojo and stop masturbating
Masturbating makes rolling more fun
post 1668189793 09-20-2022, 02:08 PM
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If they want to get better they just need to follow the “no” lifestyle to help Ukraine. Help Ukraine and good things will happen to you

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post 1668189923 09-20-2022, 02:11 PM
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Nope, I’m happy with myself. Just get lonely sometimes.
post 1668190043 09-20-2022, 02:15 PM
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I was FA and getting girls didn't do anything. I just felt worse cause I felt the same way. When you don't have a woman you think it's something wrong with you or that it's a reflection of self-development. After getting them you soon realize that the barometer for attracting women couldn't be any lower, especially these days.

Like someone above mentioned they need to just do self-improvement. Nothing really changes unless you challenge yourself by doing a new sport, learning an instrument or language, no fap, or some other kind of challenge. Unfortunately most have to learn this the hard way.
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post 1668190083 09-20-2022, 02:17 PM
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I just wanna hold a cute girl's hand while jacked thugs take her innocence.
post 1668190213 09-20-2022, 02:21 PM
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I've never understood how lonely, mal-adjusted men with nothing to live for think that getting a girl will solve anyone. Because, and here's the #1 question that's bugged men since we first had women, once you get her you have to keep her. If you're so autistic you can't have conversations with people and never leave the house, why would you think a girl's gonna stick around, even she even hooks up with you in the first place?
post 1668190253 09-20-2022, 02:22 PM
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Originally Posted By iamdetermined
I was FA and getting girls didn't do anything. I just felt worse cause I felt the same way. When you don't have a woman you think it's something wrong with you or that it's a reflection of self-development. After getting them you soon realize that the barometer for attracting women couldn't be any lower, especially these days.

Like someone above mentioned they need to just do self-improvement. Nothing really changes unless you challenge yourself by doing a new sport, learning an instrument or language, no fap, or some other kind of challenge. Unfortunately most have to learn this the hard way.
I feel like most of that stuff doesn’t even matter. When I really started putting myself out there and meeting people, I quickly realized and noticed all these dudes breaking the conventional rules and still slaying. I think it just comes down to putting yourself out there.
post 1668190403 09-20-2022, 02:26 PM
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Why should a woman get with a Miscer when it's all about booking flights, charity galas, boxed wine and tacos?
post 1668190943 09-20-2022, 02:37 PM
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It's due to social media and hookup culture. It isn't happening just on here even guys like Kinobody talk about it every day now. Lot of lonely dudes out there nowadays that spend too much time on social media or probably don't have hobbies.
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post 1668191073 09-20-2022, 02:40 PM
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Originally Posted By TheJimmyRustler
I've never understood how lonely, mal-adjusted men with nothing to live for think that getting a girl will solve anyone.
Partly becuase of the unhealthy amount of importance some parts of society puts on relationships. Misc is a good example of this.

What's usually the first thing miscers will insult a man about? "Lol you can't get girls" "Lol you don't have money"

Then you have other mal-adjusted men who do get women, but they only know how toget them oncenot retain them. Guys like Nonsense, and AWSbruh (no hate, srs.)
Originally Posted By TheJimmyRustler
Because, and here's the #1 question that's bugged men since we first had women, once you get her you have to keep her. If you're so autistic you can't have conversations with people and never leave the house, why would you think a girl's gonna stick around, even she even hooks up with you in the first place?
This is a good question.

Getting confidence may fix it for men who already had the potential in the first place, but for the guys who obviously have deep seated emotional issues they'll struggle maintaining the relationship.
Originally Posted By eod8989
It's due to social media and hookup culture. It isn't happening just on here even guys like Kinobody talk about it every day now. Lot of lonely dudes out there nowadays that spend too much time on social media or probably don't have hobbies.
Did you read the question that was asked in the OP?





Why do they avoid doing the inner work required to actually grow as a person?
Originally Posted By Jasonw1178
Why should a woman get with a Miscer when it's all about booking flights, charity galas, boxed wine and tacos?
I saw your thread in the relationship section. I know you feel the opposite of what you mean, but I also understand your frustration on some level.

Dealing with BUM females does get exhausting.
post 1668191173 09-20-2022, 02:43 PM
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Yes. Sex and companionship is a human need so at minimum that would mean fulfilled.

If you actually meet the right person it can't literally change your entire life and lead to living with them, marriage, children etc.

We need to stop downplaying the importance of this.
post 1668191293 09-20-2022, 02:45 PM
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Originally Posted By BigBallsMcgee
Yes. Sex and companionship is a human need so at minimum that would mean fulfilled.

If you actually meet the right person it can't literally change your entire life and lead to living with them, marriage, children etc.

We need to stop downplaying the importance of this.
Misc will likely never understand the importance of a good companion. Granted it's hard to find a "good one", but banging dirt slots isn't gonna get you anywhere either.
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post 1668191463 09-20-2022, 02:49 PM
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Originally Posted By BigBallsMcgee
Yes. Sex and companionship is a human need so at minimum that would mean fulfilled.

If you actually meet the right person it can't literally change your entire life and lead to living with them, marriage, children etc.

We need to stop downplaying the importance of this.
Yes? It will fix their problems? Do you know what problems they're all dealing with?

I understand the importance of a good companion (which doesn't always have to be a romantic one), but implying an external factor will be the grand fix for a mans problems is a big claim.

If what you're saying is completely true, we wouldn't have unfit parents out here. Instead we have damaged people raising damaged children who will grow into damaged people...
post 1668191723 09-20-2022, 02:54 PM
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Originally Posted By Voidgaze
FA's, Incels, Bittercel...Do you believe getting a woman will fix your problems?
There are problems in my life it won't solve, but it (struggling with getting anywhere with dating) is a problem on its own that I'd like to solve.

Solving my other most irritating problems (being a cripple - see username - and meh current job) would help with dating, but I also don't think they would solve dating for me.


E: I'd also say that struggling with dating makes me feel worse about my other issues. Feel worse if I need to stay home alone, feel more pressure to succeed career-wise, etc.
post 1668192223 09-20-2022, 03:07 PM
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Originally Posted By BigBallsMcgee
Yes. Sex and companionship is a human need so at minimum that would mean fulfilled.

If you actually meet the right person it can't literally change your entire life and lead to living with them, marriage, children etc.

We need to stop downplaying the importance of this.
Not at all. Think back to when you had that, however fleeting it was. You still found other problems to be miserable over.

Companionship and emotional fulfillment through sex/relationships matters a lot--but it's not the fix you make it out to be.
post 1668192253 09-20-2022, 03:08 PM
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Originally Posted By legbroke
There are problems in my life it won't solve, but it (struggling with getting anywhere with dating) is a problem on its own that I'd like to solve.

Solving my other most irritating problems (being a cripple - see username - and meh current job) would help with dating, but I also don't think they would solve dating for me.


E: I'd also say that struggling with dating makes me feel worse about my other issues. Feel worse if I need to stay home alone, feel more pressure to succeed career-wise, etc.
This was very insightful, srs.

I didn't know about your leg and username, that sucks man sorry.

The lack of companionship making present feelings worse makes a lot of sense.

I do hope thinks take a positive turn for you very soon.
post 1668192473 09-20-2022, 03:13 PM
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OP acting like he isnt in any of those categories
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post 1668192573 09-20-2022, 03:15 PM
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Originally Posted By bfdehewdbyywhn
OP acting like he isnt in any of those categories
Forever Alone: Nope. Can't be FA if you've dated someone before (I've had a gf, and had a date within the past 6 months...)

Incel: I can't get sex on dating apps, but I can definitely have sex IRL. Plus two dates this year off Hinge, neither of which I cared to see for a second date (personality flaws) When's the last time you went on a date or held an extended conversation with a female?

Bittercel: That's an easy one, I'm not you lmao
post 1668192723 09-20-2022, 03:17 PM
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Originally Posted By Rebel012
Not at all. Think back to when you had that, however fleeting it was. You still found other problems to be miserable over.

Companionship and emotional fulfillment through sex/relationships matters a lot--but it's not the fix you make it out to be.
It not a magical fix for everything but if you meet the right one it can make a huge difference and help mske the other things easier to deal with and give motivation to endure those things
post 1668192743 09-20-2022, 03:18 PM
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People that grew up without or chitty father = daddy issues
People that grew up without or chitty mother = mommy issues
People that lived all of their life w/o sex&intimacy of having a gf = supposed to be perfectly fine JFL. "not gonna solve your problems" cope

90% of all things men do are done only for the purpose of digging out hole

it's easy to say that citrus is overrated and not going to solve all of your problems when you are not in the middle of the ocean dying from scurvy
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post 1668192873 09-20-2022, 03:21 PM
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Originally Posted By BigBallsMcgee
Yes. Sex and companionship is a human need so at minimum that would mean fulfilled.

If you actually meet the right person it can't literally change your entire life and lead to living with them, marriage, children etc.

We need to stop downplaying the importance of this.
You have to factor in your own bias.

When you “want” something, you will start out with a normal healthy level of desire for it. But the more the object of desire continues to evade your grasp, the more and more you will want it, and the greater and greater it’s value grows in your mind. This is just the way of things.

So, in your case, what I’m saying is that it’s quite likely you OVERVALUE this stuff, for the simple fact you have struggled so desperately to get it.

I really do think that if we could grant you your wish, that of a nice relationship with a pretty little girlfriend, I honestly believe that once the novelty had worn off, you would realise it is not the holy grail of salvation you perceive it to be.

Having said that I do think relationships are a very important factor in human happiness, but relationships are not limited to the romantic.
post 1668193383 09-20-2022, 03:31 PM
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Originally Posted By alltrapbrah
You have to factor in your own bias.

When you “want” something, you will start out with a normal healthy level of desire for it. But the more the object of desire continues to evade your grasp, the more and more you will want it, and the greater and greater it’s value grows in your mind. This is just the way of things.

So, in your case, what I’m saying is that it’s quite likely you OVERVALUE this stuff, for the simple fact you have struggled so desperately to get it.

I really do think that if we could grant you your wish, that of a nice relationship with a pretty little girlfriend, I honestly believe that once the novelty had worn off, you would realise it is not the holy grail of salvation you perceive it to be.

Having said that I do think relationships are a very important factor in human happiness, but relationships are not limited to the romantic.
I really think it depends on the quality of the relationship. Been to 3 wedding this year and those guys are happy as fuk and their lady is their best friend and just changes everything for them

If we switched places, and they had to be alone for years on end instead of this loving situation, it would absolutely suck for them probably worse than it does even for me cause they aren't used to it
post 1668193633 09-20-2022, 03:35 PM
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Originally Posted By Better
People that grew up without or chitty father = daddy issues
People that grew up without or chitty mother = mommy issues
People that lived all of their life w/o sex&intimacy of having a gf = supposed to be perfectly fine JFL. "not gonna solve your problems" cope

90% of all things men do are done only for the purpose of digging out hole

it's easy to say that citrus is overrated and not going to solve all of your problems when you are not in the middle of the ocean dying from scurvy
this.

I feel like people know this but society can't admit it without causing mass suicide and violence
post 1668193663 09-20-2022, 03:35 PM
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I mean, I don't think anyone who has ever advocated for a happy, healthy relationship thinks it "solves your problems" - aside from the lack of a loving romantic relationship one.

Is theonlyproblem plaguing FAs, Incels and Bittercels simply the lack of a loving, romantic relationship?

Posts on this forum don't make me think so, anyway.
post 1668193693 09-20-2022, 03:36 PM
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Spoiler alert: It only makes it worse. srs

Get a dog and hire an escort every once in a while.
post 1668194623 09-20-2022, 03:56 PM
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#30
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Originally Posted By Jasonw1178
Why should a woman get with a Miscer when it's all about booking flights, charity galas, boxed wine and tacos?
Originally Posted By Jasonw1178
Spoiler alert: It only makes it worse. srs

Get a dog and hire an escort every once in a while.
Okay we get it. I know you're only speaking this way because your previous experience with women.

I partially agree because a lot of young ladies are lacking in self awareness and don't even know how to care for anyone's emotions besides their own, or the problem is that they can't even handle their own emotions. I. Get. It. Unfortunately men have this problem too.
Originally Posted By LogicalLifts
I mean, I don't think anyone who has ever advocated for a happy, healthy relationship thinks it "solves your problems" - aside from the lack of a loving romantic relationship one.

Is theonlyproblem plaguing FAs, Incels and Bittercels simply the lack of a loving, romantic relationship?

Posts on this forum don't make me think so, anyway.
Exactly my point lmao. This guy gets it.
Originally Posted By Better
People that grew up without or chitty father = daddy issues
People that grew up without or chitty mother = mommy issues
People that lived all of their life w/o sex&intimacy of having a gf = supposed to be perfectly fine JFL. "not gonna solve your problems" cope

90% of all things men do are done only for the purpose of digging out hole

it's easy to say that citrus is overrated and not going to solve all of your problems when you are not in the middle of the ocean dying from scurvy
I think you and BBMG are missing the point entirely, but that's partially my fault for not clarifying. I'm NOT saying sex/intimacy/relationships are overrated.

What I am saying is that they're focusing a lot on that while being blind to the mental aspect of it. BBMG got a GF and still has a piss poor mindset about a lot of things.

So while one need is fulfilled he's still a miserable fuk because he has unresolved personal problems + issues from internalizing rejection.
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