Pretty spot on

Most men nowadays don't realize girls like good texters, too many guys read red pill/pua and it shows

Lots of dudes get ghosted/stood up date day because the girl isn't sure who tf they are, because they didn't bother texting/communicating with them first

Hey guys,

First time posting in this thread.

Which is better hinge/bumble/tinder and how much time are you supposed to spend on it?

Ideally, how much time should I spend to maximize the amount of matches?

Its a balance. Too many people read into the red pill chit and will text them once a week or not at all. Don't obviously be annoying and over text but its good to get a nice momentum going with texts. If she likes you she is going to want to talk to you and not play cat and mouse games all day and respond 48 hours later to a single text.

Luci still MIA? Bet he is married now.

Its a balance.

The older guys always want to talk on the phone, which is annoying. I only text my girlfriends and dislike when they want to talk on the phone.

The fukk?

Absolutely not.

Why not?

Luci still MIA? Bet he is married now.

Waste of time to me.

I'd rather just physically meet up with a person.

Would be interesting to get a Luci update. He’s been gone for a while.

In on this thread.

Just got out a long-term relationship and had no experience with these sorts of apps before that (not sure most or any even existed then). Also didn't really have much "dating" experience before that. One evening a couple weeks ago I was bored and made a barebones Tinder just to see how the app worked. Seemed like a trash fire. Might check out some of these others like Bumble/Hinge at some point. For the time being I'm working on getting back into my own routine and self-improvement (going hard at the gym to be back in really good shape by springtime). At least I'm pretty confident that my text game is fairly good, so that ought to help, I suppose.

Small note here. Went to a restaurant last night dtown to meet family before we went to a game.

There was this really cute waitress there and she kept looking over at me. I was about to bounce to the game and she came over and hugged me, I realized it was this girl I knew a long time ago. We made out when we were super young like 13-14 and then didn’t talk much in hs.

Anyways I was feeling some flirty vibes. It could have just been friendliness since we know each other, but I think I need to reach out to this girl. I have her on ig so I think thats gonna be the route. i think it’s worth the risk.

I think it's worth reaching out too. I don't know if I'd go up and hug the guy I kissed when I was 13. I'd say hi and chat but I wouldn't just go over and hug him. Sounds like she may be interested.

In on this thread.

Just got out a long-term relationship and had no experience with these sorts of apps before that (not sure most or any even existed then). Also didn't really have much "dating" experience before that. One evening a couple weeks ago I was bored and made a barebones Tinder just to see how the app worked. Seemed like a trash fire. Might check out some of these others like Bumble/Hinge at some point. For the time being I'm working on getting back into my own routine and self-improvement (going hard at the gym to be back in really good shape by springtime). At least I'm pretty confident that my text game is fairly good, so that ought to help, I suppose.

Good job brah just keep working on yourself and meeting new people.
Worst thing to do is take no action and sit back and think on the past. Sounds like you’re in the right track. Keep in mind on the apps there’s lots of trash on there and don’t take it personally when girls are flakes lame or don’t make the time. Time will help you keep moving forward.

Any advice on texting game or social media messaging game? I suck at it lately.

Concentrating on yourself is the way to do it.
If you're going to bother with the apps, I would definitely try to get some decent pictures though.

Here are some random thoughts based on my recent experience with dating and some mistakes I’m learning from. This is just to vent, identify issues, and hopefully help any of the maybe 15 people who still read this thread LOL

1. Don’t act needy. Stop acting like you are in a relationship with a girl after a couple dates. This is a process and you have to manage expectations without putting too much pressure on people. It turns them off and turns them away. In other words relax and play it cool.

2. Don’t stalk social media too much. There are so many things on ig or fb or elsewhere that can be misconstrued and misinterpreted. It creates anxiety and increases the chance you’ll make more bad decisions in your interaction with someone you like. This goes with the next point.

3. Don’t overthink. Be playful, positive and lighthearted when texting and dating in general. Try to be fun when texting, and I don’t mean by being overly sexual early on. Don’t read into a couple texts that she sends. If she shows signs of pulling away than you can do the same instead of freaking out and interrogating her. I’ve been learning this the hard way.

4. Remember to manage expectations and keep your options open. Be comfortable talking to people, joke around and enjoy life. Good things will come.

5. Don’t take it personally when things don’t work out. There are many reasons people can not be compatible and it’s usually not anyone’s fault. You can always learn from it and improve as well.

It ain’t always easy brahs. But I hope I can keep improving and I hope you all find what you’re looking for out there. We’re all gonna make it.

The two times I tried to log in I get internal server error. Wonder what is going on with this site. hmmm..



Sorry that you and the last girl did work out. I agree with all your points above especially point #2 social media. I see social media as more bad than good. For me, I would add that if it is meant to be then it is meant to be. Otherwise, move on.

Crossing my fingers that the waitress would respond to your IG message.

I wonder if Luci has wife and children now. Lol. I am surprised he left this place.

Agreed! Thanks for your positive thoughts. The last girl was wrong for me but I’m glad I at least learned a few things from the experience.

I was hesitant to message the restaurant girl because of the old ties and knowing who she knows, which made it feel more risky. But I did think she made it a point to connect with me the other night. She could have just been saying hi though. She hasn’t replied yet and she hasn’t read the message unless she’s purposely avoiding it. I don’t think she goes on ig a lot. If she never views it I’d actually be tempted to go ask her out in person. I dunno we’ll see. I feel I should have mentioned to her that we should get together on the spot when she came up to me, but I was surprised and it was a short interaction.

I do have one hinge date setup for thurs to get drinks. She’s Cute and seems great although 8 years younger.

Lucifer must have had some life changes for sure, he was so committed to this thread before.

Lastly, yes this site/forum is the worst. There have been times where I can’t post or literally can’t see the thread for like two weeks.

With the restaurant girl, maybe she is busy with work? You already started thinking that she is avoiding you. Lol. Think positive. if she does not answer back, then just move on. You don't seem to have issues getting dates.

As for the hinge date, I think 8 years younger is fine as long as you two get along, have common values/goals and not a gold digger. haha... One of my former co-worker married her professor when she was 26 and he was 54. She was an international student at that time. Well that is what she told me.

Can I pay you to be my therapist? I feel better now. Haha seriously though, sound advice and I appreciate it.

Agree that age difference is not a big deal as long as we have common interests. I’m mid thirties and recently I noticed a bigger gap in maturity with some late twenties girls. But this girl seems cool and everyone is different. We’re going to try some beer together and it should be fun tomorrow.

Good luck, brah. Awaiting your follow-up report.

Went on my first date last night since a breakup in July. Was a tough breakup as it was someone I'd been on and off with for about 4 years (& could totally see myself being for the long haul) who has always struggled with the fact I have a kid. Finally realized I have to move on and treat her hesitancies as a "we aren't for eachother" rather than thinking eventually it would work out.
I'd still dated elsewhere a bit when we were off in those years but never really had an openness to it being longterm because of the feelings I still had for her.

A female friend reached out to me to be setup with her friend a week ago and I said sure.
We just went for a drink. The fact we were being setup by a mutual friend who absolutely wouldn't do this just for the hell of it made me think we'd at least get to a 2nd date.
I wouldn't say I felt a strong connection but two of my best experiences were when the connection didn't come until the 2nd date anyways so I was still going to suggest going out again.
For the first time in my life I got the "sorry I didn't feel a connection" text this morning. I'm okay with it as I think our schedules would've been difficult to work with (she also has a kid) & we lived like 35mins apart.
Made me realize I am ready to date again though which is a positive.
Also, not sure if it's hypocritical/selfish of me but I think I'm going to look for women without kids as their schedule is likely to be a bit more flexible.
As much as I'm trying to be open to longterm possibilities, my priority at the moment is to just enjoy myself with someone who isn't dead set on jumping into anything serious.

It’s a challenge getting back out there after a hard breakup in which you spent significant time on. Good for you bro srs.

Can’t hit it off with everyone. It sucks getting that text even when you weren’t into her that much. Good news is, that’ll save you time. It’s probably not a bad thing to be enjoying yourself and not jumping into anything, from my experience that helps you be less uptight on dates anyway. if It’s meant to be more it can turn into that. GL brah getting back out there

Thanks man, agree with all your points.
I don't find myself getting overly nervous for dates I just sometimes feel my flirting/banter is better than other times.

Definitely saves me time and stress not moving forward with a situation I was already viewing as unideal.