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Matches have pretty much died ³
Thread: Matches have pretty much died ³
12-08-2022, 03:26 PM
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#6421
- InsanePain11
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Update: restaurant girl replied to my message and seems down to get drinks. Gonna wait a couple days to reply and schedule it.
For tonight’s hinge date I texted her this AM to confirm. Haven’t heard back so we’ll see.
For tonight’s hinge date I texted her this AM to confirm. Haven’t heard back so we’ll see.
12-08-2022, 03:35 PM
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#6422
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Originally Posted By InsanePain11⏩
I get the odd person has a job where they can't check their phone but making/confirming plans is almost the only time i expect prompt responses to texts. Grinds my gears when people make you wait on that.Update: restaurant girl replied to my message and seems down to get drinks. Gonna wait a couple days to reply and schedule it.
For tonight’s hinge date I texted her this AM to confirm. Haven’t heard back so we’ll see.
For tonight’s hinge date I texted her this AM to confirm. Haven’t heard back so we’ll see.
Smalltalk I could care less.
12-08-2022, 04:34 PM
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#6423
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Originally Posted By skinnyfat88⏩
I hear ya bro it’s attractive when a girl is considerate.I get the odd person has a job where they can't check their phone but making/confirming plans is almost the only time i expect prompt responses to texts. Grinds my gears when people make you wait on that.
Smalltalk I could care less.
Smalltalk I could care less.
Anyways she did reply a little while back and it’s on for tonight.
12-08-2022, 05:49 PM
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#6424
- Rebel012
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Originally Posted By InsanePain11⏩
Regarding the restaurant girl, I wouldn't wait a couple days to respond. That's kinda a cringe pua game tactic. I get where you're coming from, but just a day at the latest. I'd respond tomorrow. Just be natural about it. And congrats on both the dates!Update: restaurant girl replied to my message and seems down to get drinks. Gonna wait a couple days to reply and schedule it.
For tonight’s hinge date I texted her this AM to confirm. Haven’t heard back so we’ll see.
For tonight’s hinge date I texted her this AM to confirm. Haven’t heard back so we’ll see.
12-08-2022, 06:54 PM
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#6425
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Originally Posted By Rebel012⏩
Yea bro I understand where you’re coming from. From my view, she took 3 days to reply so if I reply tomorrow that seems fine (will be 2 days for me)Regarding the restaurant girl, I wouldn't wait a couple days to respond. That's kinda a cringe pua game tactic. I get where you're coming from, but just a day at the latest. I'd respond tomorrow. Just be natural about it. And congrats on both the dates!
I agree it’s dumb but in reality responding in one day after she took a while seems off putting. Either way tomorrow feels good to reach out to see if we can line something up this coming week.
Gonna head out with hinge girl now.
12-08-2022, 06:57 PM
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#6426
Originally Posted By InsanePain11⏩
People actually count the days to reply back?Yea bro I understand where you’re coming from. From my view, she took 3 days to reply so if I reply tomorrow that seems fine (will be 2 days for me)
I agree it’s dumb but in reality responding in one day after she took a while seems off putting. Either way tomorrow feels good to reach out to see if we can line something up this coming week.
Gonna head out with hinge girl now.
I agree it’s dumb but in reality responding in one day after she took a while seems off putting. Either way tomorrow feels good to reach out to see if we can line something up this coming week.
Gonna head out with hinge girl now.
I personally think that's overthinking it.
It's just too..."Extra"
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12-08-2022, 07:40 PM
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#6427
- bradlehman
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Originally Posted By skinnyfat88⏩
I'm not getting upset about it or anything, but I've noted that I get a couple likes on Tinder here and there from fairly cute girls, we match, I message them, and then days go by and they haven't even read it, let alone responded to it. Weird.I get the odd person has a job where they can't check their phone but making/confirming plans is almost the only time i expect prompt responses to texts. Grinds my gears when people make you wait on that.
Smalltalk I could care less.
Smalltalk I could care less.
12-08-2022, 09:25 PM
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#6428
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lol do not play texting games with females
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12-08-2022, 09:38 PM
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#6429
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Definitely not playing too many messaging games. Gonna message the restaurant girl tomorrow, seems like a reasonable timeline.
My date was good tonight the girl was really chill and fun. Lots of laughs. I’d expect to see her again.
My date was good tonight the girl was really chill and fun. Lots of laughs. I’d expect to see her again.
12-09-2022, 10:42 AM
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#6430
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Originally Posted By bradlehman⏩
So many options on the apps for women. It either got buried beneath 30 other messages or they're focusing on someone else at the moment.I'm not getting upset about it or anything, but I've noted that I get a couple likes on Tinder here and there from fairly cute girls, we match, I message them, and then days go by and they haven't even read it, let alone responded to it. Weird.
Nothing you can do really.
Personally I put a bit of effort into my first message or two in an effort to stand out that way. There are other philosophies re how to navigate the apps but I've found that has worked for me.
12-09-2022, 01:42 PM
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#6431
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Originally Posted By skinnyfat88⏩
Yeah, there was a pretty active Tinder thread on the Misc in years gone by that was pretty funny but also probably would have been pretty helpful if I hadn't been in a LTR at the time.So many options on the apps for women. It either got buried beneath 30 other messages or they're focusing on someone else at the moment.
Nothing you can do really.
Personally I put a bit of effort into my first message or two in an effort to stand out that way. There are other philosophies re how to navigate the apps but I've found that has worked for me.
Nothing you can do really.
Personally I put a bit of effort into my first message or two in an effort to stand out that way. There are other philosophies re how to navigate the apps but I've found that has worked for me.
I thought I remembered reading in that thread at one point that messaging them right after matching was the way to go, but that hasn't made any difference so far. Granted, I messaged two people. Haha.
12-09-2022, 04:59 PM
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#6432
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Most dudes are not blackpilled on dating apps
Girls on dating apps go for top ~1% of guys
If normies saw what a Chad's tinder messages were like they'd rope
Girls on dating apps go for top ~1% of guys
If normies saw what a Chad's tinder messages were like they'd rope
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12-09-2022, 09:22 PM
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#6433
Originally Posted By xbluexhawkx⏩
What does black pilled mean?Most dudes are not blackpilled on dating apps
Girls on dating apps go for top ~1% of guys
If normies saw what a Chad's tinder messages were like they'd rope
Girls on dating apps go for top ~1% of guys
If normies saw what a Chad's tinder messages were like they'd rope
What's up with all these colors that people keep coming up with?
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12-09-2022, 10:58 PM
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#6434
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Originally Posted By iloveus⏩
it's just like the absolute extreme truth you don't want to hearWhat does black pilled mean?
What's up with all these colors that people keep coming up with?
What's up with all these colors that people keep coming up with?
lots of guys on the apps don't realize what they're up against
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12-10-2022, 05:43 PM
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#6435
- bradlehman
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Originally Posted By xbluexhawkx⏩
The apps put hypergamy into overdrive for sure. For the average guy, your odds are better out in the real world.it's just like the absolute extreme truth you don't want to hear
lots of guys on the apps don't realize what they're up against
lots of guys on the apps don't realize what they're up against
12-10-2022, 06:46 PM
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#6436
Originally Posted By xbluexhawkx⏩
What's the absolute extreme truth?it's just like the absolute extreme truth you don't want to hear
lots of guys on the apps don't realize what they're up against
lots of guys on the apps don't realize what they're up against
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12-12-2022, 02:56 PM
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#6437
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Originally Posted By InsanePain11⏩
hahaha.. you don't need a therapist. You just need to relax and don't overthink. Sooner or later you will burn out with thinking too much. Mid thirties is still young. If you are in no rush to start a family then just take your time. Finding someone that is compatible with you is hard and you want to make sure that she is the right person for you.Can I pay you to be my therapist? I feel better now. Haha seriously though, sound advice and I appreciate it.
Agree that age difference is not a big deal as long as we have common interests. I’m mid thirties and recently I noticed a bigger gap in maturity with some late twenties girls. But this girl seems cool and everyone is different. We’re going to try some beer together and it should be fun tomorrow.
Agree that age difference is not a big deal as long as we have common interests. I’m mid thirties and recently I noticed a bigger gap in maturity with some late twenties girls. But this girl seems cool and everyone is different. We’re going to try some beer together and it should be fun tomorrow.
PS there are introverted women out there too.
Originally Posted By InsanePain11⏩
Glad you had fun! When is the next date?My date was good tonight the girl was really chill and fun. Lots of laughs. I’d expect to see her again.
Originally Posted By skinnyfat88⏩
You are not selfish. Wanting a woman without kids is your preference. Everyone has preferences. Have fun!Also, not sure if it's hypocritical/selfish of me but I think I'm going to look for women without kids as their schedule is likely to be a bit more flexible.
As much as I'm trying to be open to longterm possibilities, my priority at the moment is to just enjoy myself with someone who isn't dead set on jumping into anything serious.
As much as I'm trying to be open to longterm possibilities, my priority at the moment is to just enjoy myself with someone who isn't dead set on jumping into anything serious.
12-12-2022, 09:49 PM
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#6438
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Originally Posted By SwimLiftRunGrl⏩
I agree I need to relax. totally agree I have some time. It’s not helpful to rush things or panic, and to lament over not being at a certain stage at this part of my life (sometimes I find myself falling in that mental trap). We all have our own journey. I do like introverts I just usually tend to attract the outgoing girls. Open to either type as long as we have enough in common.hahaha.. you don't need a therapist. You just need to relax and don't overthink. Sooner or later you will burn out with thinking too much. Mid thirties is still young. If you are in no rush to start a family then just take your time. Finding someone that is compatible with you is hard and you want to make sure that she is the right person for you.
PS there are introverted women out there too.
Glad you had fun! When is the next date?
PS there are introverted women out there too.
Glad you had fun! When is the next date?
So I thought the hinge date younger girl date went well..then I thought she was ghosting me. I texted her Sat afternoon and she didn’t reply until today. I was going to write her off but she says she’s down to meet again and seems enthusiastic. I know she’s a self proclaimed “bad texter” but I’m not a fan of that. Still I would like to see her as overall she seems like a cool person and we had a fun time. But not texting back for two days is not great. Haven’t replied back yet.
Restaurant girl replied to my dm at first. I wrote back to suggest a meetup day and she hasn’t looked for a few days so I’m not really thinking she’s down. Or maybe she’s just too busy. Not too worried about it tbh.
12-13-2022, 06:48 AM
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#6439
Originally Posted By InsanePain11⏩
Not to be callous but move on from this girl. No girl that's highly interested is going to take 2 hours let alone 2 days(!!) to respond to a text. A self proclaimed "bad texter" is a red flag. Just my opinion.So I thought the hinge date younger girl date went well..then I thought she was ghosting me. I texted her Sat afternoon and she didn’t reply until today. I was going to write her off but she says she’s down to meet again and seems enthusiastic. I know she’s a self proclaimed “bad texter” but I’m not a fan of that. Still I would like to see her as overall she seems like a cool person and we had a fun time. But not texting back for two days is not great. Haven’t replied back yet.
12-13-2022, 09:24 AM
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#6440
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To be honest. Girls gets so many requests and texts on socials that it can get crowded or she just don't notice. I myself don't put notifications on for any app that I use. I find it annoying. She could have legitimately just didn't even know you messaged her.
Matching the energy in the circumstance could be a mistake. Text her back and confirm the plans.
Matching the energy in the circumstance could be a mistake. Text her back and confirm the plans.
12-13-2022, 10:33 AM
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#6441
- InsanePain11
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Originally Posted By antman12⏩
Appreciate the honesty brah. After thinking about it more rationally I agree. That’s not the kind of consideration I want and it’s a bad sign right off the bat. My time will very likely be better served elsewhere so I don’t plan to schedule another date with her at this point.Not to be callous but move on from this girl. No girl that's highly interested is going to take 2 hours let alone 2 days(!!) to respond to a text. A self proclaimed "bad texter" is a red flag. Just my opinion.
12-13-2022, 01:48 PM
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#6442
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Originally Posted By InsanePain11⏩
Or you can put very minimal effort into it. Use the text to set up the date, confirm, that's it. Let her prove herself by putting in most of the effort. And of course keep focusing on other options as well til you find someone you really like and it's reciprocatedAppreciate the honesty brah. After thinking about it more rationally I agree. That’s not the kind of consideration I want and it’s a bad sign right off the bat. My time will very likely be better served elsewhere so I don’t plan to schedule another date with her at this point.
12-13-2022, 04:09 PM
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#6443
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Originally Posted By Rebel012⏩
This. I wouldn't necessarily give up completely based on this one time, but if it becomes a pattern in the near term, then bail. I definitely know girls who have hundreds of unread texts at any given time, not because they're juggling tons of guys but because they're texting a dozen friends and have a bunch of group chats going, etc. Things are bound to slip through the cracks (I know they do for me and I don't have anywhere near that number of texts at a time). If she's truly interested after another date, she'll make sure things don't fall through the cracks.Or you can put very minimal effort into it. Use the text to set up the date, confirm, that's it. Let her prove herself by putting in most of the effort. And of course keep focusing on other options as well til you find someone you really like and it's reciprocated
12-14-2022, 10:55 AM
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#6444
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Originally Posted By bradlehman⏩
My thoughts too.This. I wouldn't necessarily give up completely based on this one time, but if it becomes a pattern in the near term, then bail. I definitely know girls who have hundreds of unread texts at any given time, not because they're juggling tons of guys but because they're texting a dozen friends and have a bunch of group chats going, etc. Things are bound to slip through the cracks (I know they do for me and I don't have anywhere near that number of texts at a time). If she's truly interested after another date, she'll make sure things don't fall through the cracks.
If they're committing to meeting again that should be enough.
Everyone has different texting patterns but until you're basically in a relationship I don't think the ongoing texting is necessary.
12-14-2022, 01:06 PM
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#6445
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I reassessed things and decided to text her back the day after she replied. I mentioned a plan and a couple options of times for this weekend. We’ll see what she comes back with (texted her last night)
She seems like a cool person. At the least she’s someone I can have some drinks with and get to know. I’m willing to see where it goes.
She seems like a cool person. At the least she’s someone I can have some drinks with and get to know. I’m willing to see where it goes.
12-26-2022, 10:13 PM
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#6446
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gonna ask out my crush again. She rejected me a year ago but I'm going for the kill. She's my only friend. It's either her or nothing. Dating apps don't work. Girls have too many options on those things. Even ugly ones.
12-27-2022, 07:37 AM
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#6447
Originally Posted By imbored21⏩
You got to have an abundance mentality.gonna ask out my crush again. She rejected me a year ago but I'm going for the kill. She's my only friend. It's either her or nothing. Dating apps don't work. Girls have too many options on those things. Even ugly ones.
There are girls everywhere. You have too many options. If you don't then you need to work on yourself.
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12-29-2022, 02:44 PM
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#6448
InsanePain11, you're a big overthinker. So am I.
It's a trait that helps in certain aspects of life, but it's detrimental in others -- notably relationships.
You have to recognize it and consciously let go to a large extent.
I tend to overthink decisions, but seems like you overanalyze intent more.
It's a trait that helps in certain aspects of life, but it's detrimental in others -- notably relationships.
You have to recognize it and consciously let go to a large extent.
I tend to overthink decisions, but seems like you overanalyze intent more.
𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖘𝖊 𝖆 𝖈𝖍𝖊𝖈𝕶, 𝖓𝖊𝖛𝖊𝖗 𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖘𝖊 𝖆 𝖇𝖎𝖙𝖈𝖍
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12-29-2022, 04:11 PM
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#6449
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Originally Posted By Luc1fer⏩
!huge ******* alert!InsanePain11, you're a big overthinker. So am I.
It's a trait that helps in certain aspects of life, but it's detrimental in others -- notably relationships.
You have to recognize it and consciously let go to a large extent.
I tend to overthink decisions, but seems like you overanalyze intent more.
It's a trait that helps in certain aspects of life, but it's detrimental in others -- notably relationships.
You have to recognize it and consciously let go to a large extent.
I tend to overthink decisions, but seems like you overanalyze intent more.
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12-29-2022, 09:20 PM
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#6450
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Originally Posted By imbored21⏩
How did it go?gonna ask out my crush again. She rejected me a year ago but I'm going for the kill. She's my only friend. It's either her or nothing. Dating apps don't work. Girls have too many options on those things. Even ugly ones.
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