It's incredible how many of you hairy-holed degenerates walk around with your head held high just because you took a shower that morning. Took a shower and slapped some deodorant on your stupid armpits. You guys think you're clean? Huh? You think your body is hygienic? No sir! Absolutely not! Not when you don't shave your bung. Understand, the anus is the most disgusting part of the human body. And it's the most disgusting part by a pretty large margin, fellas. What amazes me is that some of you retards have the nerve to walk around and complain about other folks' hygiene. You do this while being furry in the backside yourself. Who gave you that kind of authority? Hygienic-authority? With a hairy anus???? Its so laughable. It really is. Talk about the pot calling the kettle black.

You can't have a hairy anus and still be hygienic. Its not possible. When you wipe, you're smearing dook all around in the hairs. You wipe yourself over and over, but you're never clean. Wet wiping is something everyone should do; I know most of you boys are filthy dry-wipers, but even wet wiping a hairy anus is insufficient. If a bird crapped on the top of your head, a wet wipe wouldn't do, would it? You'd need to rinse, scrub & repeat to get properly cleaned right? That's why you require a shower after every bowel movement when your butthole is hairy. You really do. You need to scrub that filthy place nice and good. And even then, throughout the day, your poots and buttsweat will still get trapped in the hairs. Its inevitable. Small fart particles. You probably should be scrubbing that butt every couple hours at least. Scrubbing with soap, running water and a washcloth.

Listen, just shave your buttholes, boys. That's what I'm getting at here. Its really that simple. Makes life so much easier. With no hair, you can hit that wet wipe and touch nothing but pure hole. Its a nice feeling. It truly is. Instead of stringing out your matted, sh*t-caked butthairs and still getting crusts & dingleberries, how about picking up a razor and doing the right thing for once?

I only shave my butthole when Im dating sloots or banging escorts.

Getting your salad tossed is the best feeling on earth

feelsgoodmane

Post pictures of your butthole to prove it's not hairy right now ****git

This

Dont be a ****get

These.

Pretty sure hair is there to protect

how do u do it srs?
id like to feel that way for once too
as well as the balls

Hair is to protect from homos such as yourself. It’s a built in defence mechanism for alpha cave men

Butthair is intended to keep bugs out of your stinkhole while you sleep. You taking naps out there in the meadows, my friend?.... Exposing that puckered little butthole to Mother Nature?


No...? Then shave that crap off, partner.

Im not spreading my buttcheekz and shaving. No way jose.

I do agree that you need to jump into the shower and wash your bung hole with soap and water after a dook. Toilet paper isn't going to cut it. Wet wipes is better, but still have dook on your angus as a grown adult.

hairy butthole crew

I'm down if there was a convenient way to do it. Like what am I supposed to get a mirror and go at with a razor? you crazy brah?

Maybe when I decommission my clippers I'll try it out but even then, I don't get it.

OP we had this exact discussion like 6 years ago.

And I asked you then, as I ask you now. Have you not seen this copypasta?

Don't Shave That Hair!!! I have recently made a mistake in my life, and I offer my story to you, that you may learn from my error. It all started, as many things do, with me having trouble ****ting.

No, I was not constipated; this was not a regularity problem but a matter of technique. It seems my ass-hair had grown to such a length that tiny grogans were constantly getting tied up in the matted jungle between my asscheeks. It led to much frustration, with me KNOWING that I still had something to drop, but unable to shake the tenacious turd loose from its butthair dwelling. Eventually I would have to do two things: either reach down with some paper and try to pinch off the lingering loaf (which required careful precision to avoid smearing the creature all over my rear, especially since I had no way of seeing what I was doing) or just go for broke, start wiping, and hope that I could remove all the leftover fecal matter before the toilet paper reached its Can't-Be-Flushed threshold.

I was contemplating this problem, when I had what seemed at the time to be a bright idea. "Hey! This is my butt and my butt-hair, right? So why don't I just eliminate all the hair, and then my grogans will flow out like beer from a keg!" I said to myself. It is a statement that will go down in history with a lot of other regretted statements. "How many Indians could there be?" said by General Custer. "Looks like a good day for a drive!" by JFK. "There! America On-Line now has complete Usenet access!" by some idiot system tech. Such was my anal shaving idea.

I performed the operation that night, with a cheap disposable razor and a towel to sit on. Starting from the bottom, and shaving from the crack to the cheeks, I began the arduous process of ridding my ass of hair. Occassionally, I would have to clean the razor of accumulated hair and miscellaneous slime, which I did by wiping it on the towel. Slowly, my twin mounds and the between-ravine began to resemble the hairless cheeks of a newborn baby. Finally, I wiped the razor one last time, and surveyed my work. The towel was covered with a pile of hair. My ass was smooth as ivory. I smiled, satisfied, thinking my troubles were over.

Little did I know.

I now have a great respect for anal-hair. Like everything in this world God created, it has its mighty purpose in existence. It was only after I had removed it that I started to learn how much I had been taking it for granted. For one, it provides friction. I learned this the next day, when I walked out into the sun heading for class. After climbing two flights of stairs and starting to sweat, I started to notice something unpleasant. The sweat was accumulating in my crack, and was causing the unpleasant sensation of my two asscheeks sliding past each other with every step. I thought about going to the bathroom and wiping it off, but had to get to class. Eventually, I thought, it would dry.

Unfortunately, it did dry, but only after mingling with the microscopic ****- molecules lingering around my brown starfish. When I stood up after class, my cheeks were stuck together with a slimy sticky ****/sweat combination. As I made my way back to my dorm, it started to itch. God-DAMN, did it itch! Felt like a swarm of ants was making its way up and down my crack. Fighting to keep from jamming my hand down there and scratching away, I rushed back to the dorm.

Unfortunately again, this exertion caused me to sweat, and when I finally reached my room, my cheeks were sliding back and forth against each other like a pair of horny cane-toads. I quickly dropped my pants, and attempted to dry my ass off by sticking it in front of a fan and spreading my cheeks. As I pulled the two mounds of flesh apart, a horrible stench burst free and filled the room. Every dog within a 4 block radius started to howl. I had it worst of all, as the ripe aroma of festering ****/sweat went into the fan and blew back into my face. I fought to keep from heaving. And as I sat there, fighting vomit, my ass cheeks spread and dripping, with the concentrated aroma of my body odor mixed with the tangy smell of my own **** blowing right into my face, I had only one thought: "It will be like this until the hair grows back. Weeks."

Later on, trying to deal as best I could, wiping my ass at every opportunity, I discovered another wonderful use for ass-hair - ventilation. I attempted to launch a fart, only to have it get stuck between my asscheeks. Apparently, with no hair, the two pink twins can get vacuum sealed together, and the result was a frustrating fart that slid up and down between my cheeks like a lost gerbil.

As if that wasn't enough, I am now enduring further torture. As anyone who has ever shaved anything knows, when hair is first growing in, it comes in as stubble. Imagine your ass having the texture of a brillo pad. Well, that is what I am dealing with now. It is a hellish torture, and there are many times when I just look out the window and contemplate why I shouldn't just jump out and get it all over with in one fleshy splat, rather than endure this constant agony.

Friends, DON'T SHAVE YOUR ASS-HAIR!

I also told you this:
Bro I thoroughly clean my chithole with water, wipes, AND paper. I am a phucking god among men when it comes to anal hygiene. You are probably one of those disgusting phucks that only dry wipes. It's so gross when people don't use water to clean their asses. Seriously disgusting. I always lol when I see people leave the bathroom after like 2 mins. You know their underwear is smeared with streaks of chit. Phucken disgusting man. Shower after every chit crew. After I thoroughly wet wipe all visible chit off, I then blast my hole with cool water from my handheld shower head. Then I dry wipe after. My ass is phucken spotless. If I were a homo, all the *******s would be thanking me because my butthole is so phucking clean that it could be used as a quarantine facility for the CDC. It's so clean, you could eat off it, and you should, *******. Eat my chithole.

Get in the shower and squat

You don't need a mirror, good sir. Its easy to feel your way around. The hair isn't on the actual hole, it surrounds it like a halo. Do it in the shower. Lather up, squat if you need to, start the razor at the hole and pull outwards. Don't drag it sideways and you'll be fine. No different than shaving your face. Won't take you more than a couple minutes at the most.


Wincel, I've been shaving my bung since 2005. That copy pasta means absolutely nothing to me. The guy was trying to be funny. You're acting like it's the holy gospel.

just fuking lol @ u not washing your hands with soap

don't think I forgot, you uncouth savage

I drop a boris multiple times a day and hardly ever wash my hands. Occasionally I'll get a little brown on a digit and wash them, but if my hands aren't messy, I see no need to. My fingers don't stink at all though. Never do. Maybe because I don't use single ply tissue like yourself.

And your butthole's hairy, why would anyone care what you think? You have no authority to criticize anyone else's hygienic practices. You're so proud of yourself for spritzing a little water your anus after a poop. Like it's your greatest accomplishment.

You know, von cuck, I'd have thought by now, after all these years, you'd have learned. BUT YOU REMAIN THE SAME DISGUSTING SUBHUMAN FILTH U ALWAYS WERE.


Bro I thoroughly clean my chithole with water, wipes, AND paper. I am a phucking god among men when it comes to anal hygiene. You are probably one of those disgusting phucks that only dry wipes. It's so gross when people don't use water to clean their asses. Seriously disgusting. I always lol when I see people leave the bathroom after like 2 mins. You know their underwear is smeared with streaks of chit. Phucken disgusting man. Shower after every chit crew. After I thoroughly wet wipe all visible chit off, I then blast my hole with cool water from my handheld shower head. Then I dry wipe after. My ass is phucken spotless. If I were a homo, all the *******s would be thanking me because my butthole is so phucking clean that it could be used as a quarantine facility for the CDC. It's so clean, you could eat off it, and you should, *******. Eat my chithole.

Yeah, I've heard your little anal-proclamation before. You don't seem to understand that it's completely irrelevant when your bung is hairy. You can scrub your disgusting hole for ten hours straight, but once you go out and take a stroll in the park, your butthole will begin to perspire, you'll release flatulent gas, and your anal hairs will grab onto all of that like a magnet. Your anus will stink within a couple hours of scrubbing it. I guarantee it. It'll smell just as foul as your rotten, hell-bound soul. And you'll have to scrub it all over again. To properly maintain a hairy bung, you'd have to spend most of your day scrubbing it clean. And even then, your deep-rooted feelings of shame will still remain.

With a smooth butthole, that stuff sticks to the undies, not the hairs. A simple change of underwear and the swipe of a wet nap will kill any odors that accumulate throughout the day.

OP I'm hairy and don't even wipe. Do you see animals doing either? Did Cavemen? No, so why should we??? I squat and then just stand up when done. (ded srs)

Chicks have licked my hairy bung before. I'll never understand why they want to do that. Fuking grosssssssssssss

Might just get it waxed. Thanks for the reminder

gross dude u walk around with brown underwear

Best way to do it. I get mine done every time I go get a pedicure. (about every 3 weeks)
Those little Vietnamese broads really seem to enjoy doing it.

No sir. The sweat & fumes that emanate from an anus throughout the day are inevitable. How we handle them is completely within our control. Because I shave my butthole, I'm able to actually clean myself properly throughout the day.

shaved ass crew srs

Waxing would make more sense tbh.

Still, only ****uettes do that stuff

Nice, pink butthole crew.