Will try and keep this short and to the point.

How do you guys motivate yourself to track calorie and hit the gym and push yourself hard with progressive overload in the gym every session?

I started working out around 15-16 and when I was 21 I was benching 355lbs/160kg with a bodyweight of around 175lbs (so benching over 2x bodyweight). I loved the gym and it was a good social scene too. Used to literally have strangers come up to me on a night out and ask my workout routine and supplements (guys) and random sloots asking to touch my arms and stuff. (srs).

I carried on working out until I had a bad motorbike crash around 2016. It gave me a really bad tendon issue in my left wrist, so I couldnt even lift a shopping basket up without pain. This last about a year. Got back into the gym and made some good progression and got to the leanest I've ever been, then lockdown 1.0 happened in 2020. Gyms banned and I completely lost motivation. Went off the rails a bit, ate a lot, drank a lot. Gyms opened up again, I started smashing the gym to recoup my gains - then lockdown 2.0 happened in 2021 and I just never really got back into it after that.

Apart from a few little home workouts, I've not worked out properly in about 12 months now, nor have I consistently tracked calories.

In a bit of a weird limbo, because I want to look better (like 165-180lbs, no higher than around 10% bodyfat) - but I clearly dont want it that badly, or I'd do it?

I know exactly HOW to train (because ive done it before) and I know how to track calories, how to set them, how my body responds to certain types of training or certain types of food (what fills me up, what triggers cravings, what bloats me, what doesnt etc..) - I just seem to fuk up every single day?

I don't really understand whats different from when I used to LOVE working out and it didnt seem like a chore? To now, where I just cbf and it seems like a chore.


Maybe I just need to start. Break my goals down into smaller chunks. Like instead of desiring the outcome goal (what the goal physique looks like) just focus on the goal being like "Track and hit calories for 1 week and workout 4 times with weights for at least an hour each session" and then when I start seeing progression in my physique, that will spark the motivation again?

When I used to workout 5x a week, I wouldn't say I was motivated. It was just what I did. Why wouldn't I go to the gym? That's what I do, I lift weights.


edit: #deardiary. I didn't keep it as concise as I was planning.. Is it just because I'm getting old now (31) and married etc. When you're in your teens/20s everyone is working out and theres more competition amongst peers and reasons to look good? I dunno. Surely if anything, theres more motivation when youre in your 30s and everyone has a dad bod and lay down and rots because you look even better than the people around you?


Double edit: Surprisingly, I don't look as bad as I should considering I've eaten and drank whatever the fuk i've wanted the last 2-3 years. I also walk around 15,000-20,000 steps everyday (dog walking) which I think helps. I think my calorie burn is pretty high, I just need to fix what I'm eating and track it again and start working out.

Bro if you've been working out as long as you say you've likely next to maxed out your gains and strength.
Time to move on to different focuses.
Cardio, kettle bells, bodyweight endurance, flexibility, maybe start competing in assault courses to test yourself or start bjj.
Fk macro counting at this point. You should know what to eat by now.
Start meditating and using breath work.
Until you find your new approach still go gym bro for the healthmaxx gains. If you're healthy and in your 30s you still mog 99% of the male population. Providing you're not maxing out and stressing your joints You're also paying into your older age insurance, keeping maintaining test, keeping dopamine high, keeping immunity high, maintaining strength for practicality and self defence, ect - all that good stuff that will be becoming more and more valuable as you get older.

This is easy. Just go out for a drive in a club disctrict, on a Friday or weekend night, and see all the hot sloots dressed scantily. Think of how much better it would be to tearing their clothes off and slaying that vag with your dink, and cooming into their eager slooty mouths, than sitting at home alone gobbling down chicken nuggets.


They want that delicious man-juice, breh. That's why they're out and dressed like that. Give them what they want.

noo haha definitely havent maxxed out. Thats the problem. I'm like 165lbs and probs 15% bodyfat atm. I've lost near all the muscle I had, but for some reason still have 'some' despite not working out in such a long time.

A different style of training or sport (like martial arts) could be fun though and might help motivate the muscle building side of things.

I look incredibly average at the moment. I always used to be known as the guy who goes to the gym, or the guy with big biceps. Now it's not. It's like the identity shifted.

lmao. I'm happily married bro. Have been for 5 years and with her for 12 years.

I still get a fair few girls hitting on me and sliding up in my DMs, but they are denied.

Smashing other poosy isn't a motivating factor when I'm married. I guess it doesn't hurt though to keep the mrs on her toes by drawing more attention to it though lol.

Getting attention from other girls when youre in a relationship or married, is nice for the ego, but it's also annoying.

It's become a cliche, but...

The thing is you don't hate yourself enough to wanna change lol. Two years ago my test levels were literally 30 and my physique looked terrible, that was the impetus for me to make a change. I've put on a ton of size since, and I wasn't even lifting the entire time because I was focusing on other things for several months at a time, got covid twice and had a horrible cough each time afterwards that lasted months and made it really hard to eat, still dealing with sleep apnea (which is why I'm up right now). If I didn't have to deal with all that dumb **** my gains would have been way better, but I still put in the work anyway because it's what I wanted to do. I sent a recent pic to someone I know and they were convinced it wasn't me lol. Also, clear your private messages.

i will read all this and get back to you soon op

who is
your rolemodel?

"Jocko, my child has a terminal illness" - "GOOD!" lol..

I can kinda see where hes coming from. I guess if I apply it to this situation, it's good that I havent been going to the gym in 12months and my diet sucks because it means that my newbie gains will be quicker and when youre doing lots of things wrong, then its easier and quicker to see progression.

E.g. to beat your 1RM if your bench is 400lbs, its going to be HARD as hell to add another 20-50lbs. But if its like 120lbs, it going to be easy to double it.Have you looked into one of those oxygen/sleeping masks? My dad had sleep apnea and swears it changed his life. Apparently its quite common for people to die in their sleep with sleep apnea, but also go through the day feeling tired AF because you arent getting full REM sleep and enough oxygen.

I definitely didn't "hate" myself when I was in really good shape before though. I was fueled/motivated by the ego and compliments I guess.

I kinda get what you mean though. It's like work/earning money. Once you've got a good networth, or good income - it's hard to still have that drive to change gear and get even more. I think it's part of human nature right? Once you are in a safe/comfy spot, you want to stick there. If its AWFUL, then you've got such a ****ing drive and ambition to change it.

I think my lack of desire for working out is because I haven't got a strong enough WHY (reason to get in sick shape). I don't know why on one hand I want it, but on the other hand my actions don't reflect it.Awesome. Looking forward to reading your response.I had role models for different reasons in my life. As I've gotten older and more successful though, I've realised that the people who I looked up to before weren't heroes and it just looked that way. It's a bit disappointing.

I think you just need to make yourself do it consistently for a month or so then you'll be back in the groove. Gotta make it a habit again.

It's been hard to find the right mask and it sucks, I am so ****ing tired right now. My sleep has been really bad my entire life, and I also gained 80 lbs in three years so I'm not sure if I had it before or if it's a new thing. But yeah, it's all about desire, just like pretty much anything in life.

The guys video (top one) makes sense. Watching the second one now.

This is some pics of me over the years. Lots of fluctuations in weight

17 years old. (terrible quality and strong downlighting use)


At my heaviest, around 185lbs or so (with a pump)


Probably leanest here


Probably my most preferred level



Now, roughly 12months or so no gym and eating and drinking too much. So not as bad as I could look considering, but meh..




Ill start tracking cals again, get in a deficit for 3 months or so.

Aims: Get down to 10% or so bodyfat, then do a lean bulk. Weight lift 4-5x a week from now and continue at it.

Will post pics back in this thread in 3 month or so as an update.

Yo OPie, typing this as a brah who like you also entered 30's and noticed similar shift in mindset.

Ignore it. Tone down the volume and train smarter and preserve your fitness. Go twice or trice a week max and focus on other things in life and don't tear yourself down in the gym. It ain't worth it, also it ain't sustainable if ur natty.

You already put in the work before and kinda maXxed out your natty gains, so all you needs to do is not eat and drink like a lunatic and just give proper stimuli to your body to hold on to the muscle.

P.S. you still look really good, apart form your midsection, you really need to start doing direct ab work, but other then that you're literally 1-2 months away from being @ natty maXx if you go on a regime of training & diet, dead fukin srs, trust me, I train high end clientele.

gl bra

OP dont listen to this ph0ggot. He chits on walls.



Anyhow motivation is for pussies. Its here one moment and gone the next. Sorry but you must become fully disciplined. Ask yourself do you want to be a weak bitch who only goes off motivation, or do you want to the best physical and mental version of yourself?


Kill your inner bitch OP.

Bro I'm a UK blah also in his 30s and you look way above average, especially for age. Don't worry about getting to your previous heaviest as genuinely that looks maxed out for a healthy natty (if you are natty).
Just get back in the gym as duty and yeah consider a new approach. Personally I've gone back to Hitt sprinting, doing more kettle bells and calisthenics. Only do about 3 sets to failure with the heaviest being a 7 rep max reps on Dumbbells. Way easier to recover. Muscle memory is very real and you'll wake those pathways up once back in without having to go as intense as you did to initially build muscle in the first place.

Get the whole foods, minerals, vitamins, and antioxidants in. You'll be more than happy in three months if you get back to it.
Will await the update.

Here’s some OG god-tier motivation for you OP. Courtesy of the late, great, Greg Piltt (RIP). This guy contributed to my mindset to get into the gym in the early days. Thought I’d dig up this nugget of wisdom for you.

Learn a new fighting skill, boxing, bjj, muay thai, mma ect
Get good at cardio something you enjoy
Contiune to lift weights but do it because you want to not because you want to go to gainsville
Dont count calories or macros (try to eat better without tracking fk all)
Focus on getting better at things you enjoy

Motivation can only carry you so far. As you've gotten older you've come to realize that being a shredded kunt isn't the life changing goal that you expected it to be when it comes to feeling happiness and fulfillment in life. So much stuff happens that it's no longer a priority.

Read atomic habits and turn lifting and diet into a habit which means you will stay consistent and that's the secret. Consistency. You don't have to turn fitness into a lifestyle that dominates or defines your life. Btw you're still more aesthetic than 90% of people i see outside daily.

i constantly tell myself what i have is not good enough. work harder, get better, eat more egg whites, is my routine fully on point? what muscle groups need more attention?

anything less than pure perfection isnt fukn good enough

Motivation is a trap. Discipline is the way to go.

Greg O Gallagher said something similar. Saying setting a target (if youre natty and not an athlete) of 3x a week for weights is better because youre more likely to stick at it for a longer time consistently than 5x a week over the long run and the recovery is better.

Thanks, appreciate it! Not doing direct abs work before was definitely a bad thing. So many people on here and online would say "you dont need to do direct abs work because they will be getting hit from squats,deads and general moving around" - but so would say your biceps, but nobody would say you dont need to train biceps and just to get lean.lol what? chits on walls?

That's true. I need to change the mindset to something that needs to get done. Like paying bills, or brushing teeth.Thank you! Appreciate it. The previous maxed out bloat lord was with deca (I think) and some test, maybe something else. I did a few cycles when I was younger, but havent done anything for a few years (maybe 5?). Don't have any plan on going back to the darkside. I think i'd rather stay natty and have it more sustainable and a healthy lifestyle. It's easy to get big or get ripped when juicing, but when you come off its hard to maintain if you aren't follow a healthy lifestyle/strict training.Ah I love greg plitts videos. I used to watch them so many times and they'd fire me up. Shame he's not around anymore.This is solid advice actually. I used to be big on my cycling. I think I'll get back into that and maybe pickup a new sport like martial arts. I'm moving in the next couple of months kinda far away where I won't know many people, so I need to pick up a few new hobbies to make some new friends haha!

I think the disconnect I had was that I would think I want to get in shape because it would benefit my work/clients - not because I genuinely wanted to or was unhappy with how i looked. So I should change that mindset, as the existing one clearly wasnt working.Atomic habits is an amazing book. One of my favourites. Definitely overdue re-reading it, so thanks for the reminder. Reading Think Rich Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill atm.

I think consistency is the key to success in every area tbh, especially work. You don't have to do something perfect, but if you can do it good enough and regularly enough consistently then you will reap rewards.

I find that as you get older, its hard to maintain balance on a lot of things. It's like I'm constantly spinning plates on sticks. Focusing on socialising with friends and maintaining relationships, working out, eating healthy, looking after the house and garden etc, life admin, keeping in touch and being around for family members etc, building and growing a business, looking after pets etc.I know a lot of people say that positive loops are more productive and healthy (E.g. If I go to the gym for an hour, then I will play playstation for an hour or eat a small magnum ice cream - or something) but I've also heard a lot of people respond to negative better and most entrepreneurs and high end businessman do that. Makes sense more so I guess if you say "If I haven't hit 15,000 steps by Midday, then I have to go for a 6 mile run") - because the idea of doing a 6mile run is horrible - so I'd make sure I definitely got my steps in and if i didnt, then I get "punished" with something thats positive for me.

one has to find what works best for them, and the truth is that for me its not all negative. in fact the negative is in the minority, but using negative thoughts to light that metaphorical fire under your ass to strive to improve is effective.

Exactly, that **** fuels a lot of super successful people.



It sounds cliched, but it really is all about consistency. If you skip one meal and workout in a month, it won't have much of an effect, but if you're doing that multiple times per week, it damn will.

exactly dude, dedicate yourself and stay true to it forever. things will not happen over night.

the sheer difficulty of reaching extreme goals makes the results much more valuable.


and being able to walk up to a pretty girl who is a complete stranger to you, looking her directly in the eyes and hearing her let out a sexual moan right in front of her boyfriend is a good feeling

Well since you made a post like this it means you still somewhat care

Since you still somewhat care, that means you just have to do it

The gym improves my mental state, physical health and outward appearance. Why wouldn't i shape my whole life around it? Sounds drastic, but is it really? 60-120 minutes 4-6x per week. What else would you do with that time? Misc? There's almost nothing that you could do with that time that'd be better spent. Plus when you have kids this whole lifestyle being adopted by them at an early age sets them up to mog their fggt classmates. Discipline, focus, self motivation, blah blah blah all learned through pushing yourself further week after week in the gym.

You don't inspire your kids being skinny fat though. You've gotta be in shape. Stay shredded king