I tried contacts once in college and hated them so much that I never tried them until yesterday. They had aclassand the woman was showing me how, but I really felt it was impossible for me to put something in my eye. I could keep trying, but you have to pass the class before they give you the contacts. I don't know if my idea about my nose is irrational. I don't see women gushing over people like me - the closest noses I can think of would be Gandy or Cavill, but theres are better than mine. The rhino is still an attractive option. If you insist I try contacts again, then I'll repeat the class when I get my car.

I do not live with my mom. I rent a 4 bedroom 2 bath home and live by myself. She wants to live with me because she has no money and I have enough to support her. I have paid for her things and continue to do so (such as her phone bill). She lives with her parents (both of whom are still alive). Grandfather is 90; grandmother is in her 80's. I recently got Fidelity on my phone. It isn't all my assets (I've got a checking account and Coinbase), but it shows I'm not broke. I screenshotted this a few minutes ago. The market has been down so it's lower than usual - hoping it goes back up, hah. I don't reveal that I'm carless. For example, the woman with a boyfriend probably thinks I own a Dodge Ram 1500 because that's what I was renting for our 2nd date in which her male friend parked next to me. By the way, IwishI wouldn't have been a complete moron in my 20's with investing (I didn't do it). I was financially illiterate and was making very little money.

Lmao we posting financial statements now and outright rejecting the idea of BY FAR the easiest and most helpful upgrade to your looks? Oh man I didn't think this could get worse.

I posted that just to be clear that I'm not broke. I have that app on my phone in case a woman I like finds out I don't have a car. I can show her that or Coinbase to make her know it's not a financial problem. Did you see the new frames I'm getting? They're much less nerdier and should be in next week. They should fit my face better as well since the lenses are circular.I was not planning to go, but I believe I will go there later today. I need to exercise then shower and head to the mall for several hours. My watch just came in and I can have someone at the mall resize it and set the time for me. I also got new socks that will fit better.

Lol it's so obvious. OP is so far on the spectrum that he's just banging his head against the wall trying to date bottom of the barrel thrash single mums and still getting rejected every single time. The irony is that he looks down on autistic women as being "not normal", while he is super autistic himself.

I'm getting a car soon so it isn't really a big deal. I am trying to show women that I have value. Many women aren't giving me a chance to show them my personality and other things I can provide.I struggle with certain things due to my inexperience, but I'm skeptical about your suggestion that I might have autism. I believe I am making progress. We've already discussed why dating is difficult for me (e.g., no friends to go out with, women have unlimited options, I've been excessively eager with women and it turns them off, etc.).

Wait you're actually doubtful whether you're autistic yourself? Are you serious?

Absolutely.

Lol. Yeah this is hopeless. I'll just be here for the lulz to watch it all go wrong repeatedly.

Whatever you say. I'm optimistic. I'm eating, heading to the gym, showering after, then trying the mall for a few hours. This watch is neat. The face of it is green. For only $110, it's a nice one.

We all agree there's a difference between being socially awkward and autistic, right? I thought autists didn't form strong attachments to people. OP has literally cried over women and in front of them. He desperately wants a LTR / wife and kids. Apparently, I am wrong and this behavior is not at all unusual among the autistic population. It seems I believed stereotypes that aren't necessarily accurate.

It also made sense to me that OP was "just" socially awkward because he didn't have a father, male role model or male friends that would have helped shape him during his main developmental years. That all makes sense. And, if that's all it is, then I think a person can overcome that IF he is willing to push himself, put himself in difficult situations, observe and adjust based on outcome. I think OP has trouble with that last step, reading social cues and adjusting accordingly (especially in the moment).

OP, does anything in this article resonate with you?https://psychcentral.com/autism/auti...-relationships

It seems like everyone has a lot of trouble with understanding diagnoses (in general, not just autism, but BPD etc. too).

It's a spectrum. It isn't "objectively" black and white. If someone visits a professional, they evaluate (base on DSM I believe), a number of different traits and may make a crude diagnosis if enough of those conditions are met.

We are all literally on a spectrum for every possible trait. But traits can cluster, and when those traits are deviations off the norm it's useful to classify in order to address the diagnosis.

That's why I said OP should visit a professional. Some of these traits are negatively interfering with his life. It's painfully obvious that OP has trouble with social cues, interpreting social situations and intent, understanding what's appropriate in social contexts.

So incolloquial language, it's pretty fair to crudely say OP is autistic. That is a decent descriptor based on the behaviors everyone has witnessed. Is it as bad as some "autistic" folks? No. Is it interfering negatively with his life? Yes. Can he solve it simply through more social interactions? No idea. Would he be diagnosed that way by a professional? No idea.

OP has admitted to not being neurotypical in these situations already. So no point in getting hung up on definitions I guess.

This.

Visiting a professional would probably help. What's wild and mind blowing to me is that he just pretends that he's not autistic. Probably a dozen or so posters in this thread have noticed it instantly. Surely this can't be the first time he's heard this, right????

This whole thread is autistic, hell, the first post, and even the title of this thread is autistic.

I recommended OP an e-book for aspergers, written back in the 90's:

https://www-users.york.ac.uk/~ade1/s...l/survival.pdf

idk if he actually read it. it's a quick read. Also, they don't use the term aspergers anymore; autism is just a spectrum and some people land on low or high ends.

Anyways, he could benefit from having more self awareness, as well as professional help, social exposure, critiquing from someone close to him who's not afraid to be honest

Sure, I understand that it's a spectrum and I'm freely admitting my errors / ignorance of the diagnosis as a whole. Maybe it's more what used to be called Asperger's, but I think they eliminated that in a more recent DSM. Anyhow, I appreciate your input -- I think you said you've struggled with some of these issues but maybe less so these days.

I'm not sure OP would agree with your statement "...it's pretty fair to crudely say OP is autistic." He said he doesn't really consider the possibility he might be autistic, so I wanted to see if anything in that article applied to him from his perspective. Maybe he thinks all of it is explained with a lack of experience. I'm not trying to pile on OP.

Thank you everyone for your replies. I will address them this evening when I get back from the mall. I just got back from the gym and am going to shower then go to the mall.

I got to talking a bit with a really cute Latina at the gym who was working out in the squat rack next to me. She didn't seem super interested, but I ended up asking for her number after some small talk about her shoes and her Harley Davidson t-shirt. She said, "I have a boyfriend." That's 3/12 when it comes to getting a woman's number at the gym.

As I was going to the stairs to walk down and exit the gym, I saw the cute Indian woman I first saw a few weeks ago. She's not as attractive as I thought, but she's still attractive. I didn't say anything to her, and I regret it. At least I know she seems fairly consistent about the time she goes to the gym on Saturdays. I hope to see her again.

I saw these two younger white guys (I've seen them multiple times). I talked to them for a few minutes and commented on one of their noses because he has a pretty good nose (it is proportional to his face and has a slight upturn). The other one wanted to know what I thought of his nose. They were nice and fun to talk to. I told them I'm considering rhinoplasty. One of them said my nose isn't THAT bad, but he said if you've got the money and it makes you happy then go for it. RHINO FUEL.

don't do that again lol

Lmfao op cannot be a real person. This has to be a based as fuk troll thread.

I just use the term autistic myself as a general term how regular people would call it. It's literally obvious to any single person in this thread within reading just a few posts. That's how big the difference is between regular people and OP. Whether there's a different technical term for it I don't really care. I find it hard to believe this is the first time he's heard this in his life, there's no way.

As I've said before I'm not even trying to put OP down or call it a negative thing. But it is what it is, and it's very clear. Denying it is just a recipe for disaster.

I'm sure it was a fun conversation and they played along, but I'm curious if you're self aware enough to know that it's a bit unusual to start examining and complimenting someone's nose like that.

I think I'm more immature with relationships than I amautistic. Nothing really resonated with me from the article. I think everyone wants someone who's honest, reliable, and loyal. Also, some of the things it said autistic people struggle with (such as when to know it's time to kiss) are not things I struggle with, in my opinion.

Lol @ this wording in the article:



I will look into an appointment to see a psychiatrist or psychologist. I also need to schedule a dermatology appointment. I'll look into those on Monday.Never heard someone say in real life that I may be or am autistic.I'll read it tonight or tomorrow. More experience is what I desire. It's hard to get that once you're out of university and work a remote job. If you've read this thread, you know I've had some good outings with females, but not too many. I wish the woman with the boyfriend still wanted to talk to me, but I'm not too hung up on it.You're right. I don't think it's that easy to say, but I suppose I'll find out soon when I see the psychiatrist or psychologist.They're pretty cool and were talking about random chill stuff before so it wasn't like a huge shock or something. I think they'll probably sayhito me when they see me again.I'm real. Also, I thought you're out of this thread? HAHA.We're going to find out.Yes, I know it's a bit unusual but it's not a huge deal. I'm not taking a neg to my social reputation. If anything, they may just be acquaintances at the gym now.It's real. No troll.

I went to the mall. I talked to an acquaintance from high school at the mall; he helps his dad out at one of the kiosks. He said I look handsome.. It's too bad the women I approached today didn't feel the same. I got my watch set to the right time and fitted to my wrist. Had to come back, especially since I was getting tired as hell and I need calories (will be cooking right after I post this). I spoke to 7 women, and only asked 4 of them for their numbers. 2 of them said, "I have a boyfriend," and the other 2 were walking together and didn't want to give me their number so I asked for IG and they said yes. The 2 who gave me their IG had their asses hanging out. I talked to them for a minute while walking with them. I lead with, "What's that Arabic tattoo say?" She had it on her upper hamstring. She smiled and told me, "Love yourself." Anyway, I sent her a DM. Probably going to get ignored or blocked, but whatever. Gotta try, right?

I don't think Chris Hemsworth could say that and get away with it

mega cringe

tf r u doing?

Lol I thought it was straightforward and ties in to what she and I were talking about. I don't think she's interested in me because she didn't follow back. I just threw it out there.

Also, strong profile pic. I wonder where you got that from.

The good thing about being autistic is that you don't have shame because you lack that extra self awareness

Friend of mine just plays the numbers game most people think he's weird but he'll talk to every girl at the bar and one will eventually say yes to him

It's a good strategy if you lack the shame OP keep at it at some point somebody will bite, I admire that you're at least out there trying

Thanks. I need a new outlet, as the mall is something I'm only interested in trying once a week at most (on a Saturday or Sunday). The gym is legit, but so many of them have boyfriends (or so they claim). Once I get a car, I'm going to try bars and other stuff more routinely, perhaps even speed dating (as cringe as that may be). I don't think I "lack shame." How else am I supposed to find someone? From a dating app? I've got a ways to go, if ever, before I can become a top 15% profile in my area. I'm not on the apps at the moment.

This hottie who follows one of the women I met at the mall a few weeks ago justlikedtwo of my photos on IG. She's verified. Is this real life? She didn't follow me, but...should I say something?

Edit: I believe she looked at wholikedthe mutual friend's recent photo and scrolled through profiles and is trying to get people to follow her bylikingphotos. That's my pragmatic mind at work. I need to work on my IG. Getting lean as heck will help.

Are you not worried about becoming the gym creep who asks for every attractive girls number right off the bat?

Not at all. I've spaced out my 12 approaches. I have a few women in mind that I want to approach in the coming week(s). To me, the fact that they've seen me at least once helps me because it makes it seem less desperate. Some of the women have seen me multiple times (e.g., 3-5+) before I approach them. Only a few of the women I've approached are ones I had never previously seen.