I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.

He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?”

I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen crack rocks in his hands without paying.

The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.

When she took one of the rocks and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each rock and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.

Who the fk wrote this? Did you write this?

OP is known to be THE most hung guy on the misk, possibly one of the biggest in the world. his cock has been described as "like an evian bottle", with gargantual thickness that would rival shane diesel and shorty mac. im estimating his size to be at least 8.5" bone pressed, with OVER 7" of girth. he would have absolutely destroyed Michellelane's ().they would have spent hours and hours on foreplay, getting herself wet enough just so she can take it. i can just imagine her begging for it, with OP barely able to force it past the knob, and Michelle moaning and squirming, demanding him to force it in deeper. she would have orgasm'd within seconds of taking the entire length, being filled and stretched right up to her cervix.. the orgasm would have been powerful, with her vaginal muscles clamping down on OP’s throbbing monstrosity, her whole body quivering in euphoria..i bet she still masturbates to the memory of it

Sometimes when I poop, I use the shaping attachment from my old Play Doh fun set. I place it on my anus, and make poops in different shapes. There's nothing strange about that at all. I'm an American, living in America, and if I want to have poops shaped like stars, I have every right to. The founding fathers would have wanted it that way.

This thread fucking delivers

should’ve hit with the “ u aware brah ?”