Log In

Your email is not your username

Register

If you were a member of the old Bodybuilding.com forums and would like to reuse your previous username, you can request it below. We use your email only for registration and do not store it. For more information, please see our Privacy Policy.

Confirm your email

A registration code was sent to your email. Enter it here.

Welcome

You have successfully setup your account.

Sign in

Quick Navigation Bottom Misc
Forum » how to be assertive without being an azzhole
  1. Results 1 to 18 of 18
  2. Page 1 of 1

Thread: how to be assertive without being an azzhole

post 1622681831 11-15-2020, 08:22 AM
-
#1
  1. Rexcalibr
  2. Handsome Rex
  1. Rexcalibr
  2. Handsome Rex
  3. Join Date: Mar 2014
  4. Location: Ontario, Canada
  5. Posts: 12,314
  6. Rep Power: 17506

how to be assertive without being an azzhole

if you don't get treated fairly in a situation by customer service, bill collectors, restaurant staff, etc how do you handle the situation? I lose my cool when I get bad service or bad food sometimes, especially if its consistent at the same location I let them know about it and make it a point to always take my food back and get a refund or have my order fixed and complain. problem is, I have a hard time keeping my cool and not being an ass hole (though some people deserve it) , how can you get what you want and be assertive without being harsh? i don't want to be that guy that complains and is difficult but also hate wasting money on garbage service by lazy employees. problem is, being an azz hole is addicting when it helps you get what you want and then I tend to be like that a lot more often
-best poster of 2017 (haters are jealous as fuk lol ya'll can't see me i stay crispy)
post 1622682091 11-15-2020, 08:26 AM
-
#2
  1. zarathu5tra
  2. Registered User
  1. zarathu5tra
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Jun 2017
  4. Age: 35
  5. Posts: 6,311
  6. Rep Power: 54983
Stay friendly but concisely state irrefutable facts. Majority of communication is done non-verbally so you have to be aware of your body language.
post 1622682641 11-15-2020, 08:34 AM
-
#3
  1. The Prime Nip
  2. Prime Nip PharmD
  1. The Prime Nip
  2. Prime Nip PharmD
  3. Join Date: Aug 2007
  4. Posts: 9,019
  5. Rep Power: 31132
Maybe walk away and don't go to that restaurant again.
*Fulfilling My Destiny Crew*
*Kaizen Crew*
*Audiobook Crew*
*Alexander The Great Crew*
*Patrice O'Neal Crew*
post 1622682711 11-15-2020, 08:35 AM
-
#4
  1. Hutrapper
  2. Registered User
  1. Hutrapper
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Mar 2019
  4. Age: 56
  5. Posts: 19,735
  6. Subscribers: 1
  7. Rep Power: 249297
I never lose my cool, but also try not to let the prospect of being an ******* change how I act..

Its just so turns out though, that coming off as an ******* is seldom the best way to get what you want.
See BrianDaMans sig.

Rep SoapKing on sight crew.
Semi tradie crew
lol@tradies crew
Certified HTC
post 1622682871 11-15-2020, 08:38 AM
-
#5
  1. blazenbb
  2. Registered User
  1. blazenbb
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Nov 2019
  4. Age: 56
  5. Posts: 6,874
  6. Rep Power: 49941
Lmao if you think being a prick is the way to go. They were going to comp your meal either way. Instead, you just earned yourself ass crack hands and food tampering
post 1622683051 11-15-2020, 08:41 AM
-
#6
  1. Smegmalion
  2. Entire NYPD should go on
  1. Smegmalion
  2. Entire NYPD should go on
  3. Join Date: Feb 2011
  4. Location: Phoenix, Arizona, United States
  5. Posts: 5,656
  6. Rep Power: 31310
Originally Posted By The
Maybe walk away and don't go to that restaurant again.
This, just in general. Also this, because maybe they really are ****ing with you and they can’t believe you keep coming back, lmao.
Entire NYPD should go on strike. You'll see then how quickly the mayor changes his tone.

"Dig with your hands, not with your mouths"

Entire NYPD should go on strike. You'll see then how quickly the mayor changes his tone.
post 1622683071 11-15-2020, 08:41 AM
-
#7
  1. Godfrd824
  1. Godfrd824
  3. Join Date: Oct 2008
  4. Location: DevilMayRage's Head, Rent Free
  5. Posts: 57,256
  6. Subscribers: 2
  7. Rep Power: 383551
If my food is wrong I simply ask them politely to fix it. If I'm not getting what I need from customer support I ask for a manager. I do not under any circumstance have sex with men.
When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the fear of death, so that when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home.
post 1622683311 11-15-2020, 08:45 AM
-
#8
  1. phillipkessel
  2. Banned
  1. phillipkessel
  2. Banned
  3. Join Date: Nov 2020
  4. Age: 56
  5. Posts: 35
  6. Rep Power: 0
I rarely get upset over things that dont really matter. like anything regarding food/drinks/serice in a restaurant is not enough for me to care about.

when it comes to billing, subscriptions, insurance, cellphone/internet bills and stuff like that I can get heated though. honestly if im pissed I just let my anger out and let the chips fall where they may.
post 1622683391 11-15-2020, 08:45 AM
-
#9
  1. Rexcalibr
  2. Handsome Rex
  1. Rexcalibr
  2. Handsome Rex
  3. Join Date: Mar 2014
  4. Location: Ontario, Canada
  5. Posts: 12,314
  6. Rep Power: 17506
Originally Posted By blazenbb⏩
Lmao if you think being a prick is the way to go. They were going to comp your meal either way. Instead, you just earned yourself ass crack hands and food tampering
that is the main fear I have with restaurants, so I never go full azzhole just 75%
-best poster of 2017 (haters are jealous as fuk lol ya'll can't see me i stay crispy)
post 1622684021 11-15-2020, 08:53 AM
-
#10
  1. blazenbb
  2. Registered User
  1. blazenbb
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Nov 2019
  4. Age: 56
  5. Posts: 6,874
  6. Rep Power: 49941
Originally Posted By Rexcalibr⏩
that is the main fear I have with restaurants, so I never go full azzhole just 75%
Why at all though? Mistakes happen and they are aware of that, highly doubt they did it to you intentionally. They are never going to hook the guy being an azzhole up the most. I think they would make it up more to the guy being polite.
post 1622684271 11-15-2020, 08:56 AM
-
#11
  1. Seamanbeast
  2. Registered User
  1. Seamanbeast
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Sep 2020
  4. Age: 56
  5. Posts: 1,441
  6. Rep Power: 1818
Read the book "Winning through intimidation" by Ringer. There is a difference between being assertive and aggressive and just being a prick.
post 1622684601 11-15-2020, 09:00 AM
-
#12
  1. Ironmanlet
  2. Adamantium User
  1. Ironmanlet
  2. Adamantium User
  3. Join Date: Aug 2009
  4. Location: Cajun Country
  5. Age: 40
  6. Height: 5'7"
  7. Weight: 185 lbs
  8. Posts: 52,365
  9. Subscribers: 5
  10. Rep Power: 415557
Being assertive will always bee seen as being an add hole to passive people, and weak to aggressive people.

All because fat patients don’t like it when their doctor calls them fat, doesn’t make him an *******
“The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood. Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.“

PS: Don't eat poop, just don't let the idea of it stop you from living life to its fullest.
post 1622684711 11-15-2020, 09:02 AM
-
#13
  1. Rexcalibr
  2. Handsome Rex
  1. Rexcalibr
  2. Handsome Rex
  3. Join Date: Mar 2014
  4. Location: Ontario, Canada
  5. Posts: 12,314
  6. Rep Power: 17506
Originally Posted By SuperHercules⏩
First you need some self respect and confidence so you don't have to look for secret techniques on how not to be a spasctic Timmy when something doesn't go your way
thats the problem, being that spastic timmy usually gets me what I want and makes me more confident in doing it again because it works. will try to be more conscious of it tho and not in every dispute
Originally Posted By phillipkessel⏩
honestly if im pissed I just let my anger out and let the chips fall where they may.
pretty much same
-best poster of 2017 (haters are jealous as fuk lol ya'll can't see me i stay crispy)
post 1622684731 11-15-2020, 09:02 AM
-
#14
  1. Misc420Doctor
  2. Registered User
  1. Misc420Doctor
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: May 2020
  4. Age: 56
  5. Posts: 3,662
  6. Rep Power: 9286
Why are you afraid of being seen as an *******?
Cash Rules Everything Around Me
post 1622684961 11-15-2020, 09:05 AM
-
#15
  1. ralphlaurenbrah
  2. Registered User
  1. ralphlaurenbrah
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Oct 2013
  4. Age: 36
  5. Posts: 10,357
  6. Rep Power: 31773
The first problem is you’re worried about what people think of you at all. Stop caring and just speak. You people overthink everything lmao
post 1622685061 11-15-2020, 09:06 AM
-
#16
  1. darscogre
  2. Registered User
  1. darscogre
  2. Registered User
  3. Join Date: Feb 2009
  4. Age: 54
  5. Posts: 1,085
  6. Rep Power: 2259
Originally Posted By Rexcalibr⏩
if you don't get treated fairly in a situation by customer service, bill collectors, restaurant staff, etc how do you handle the situation? I lose my cool when I get bad service or bad food sometimes, especially if its consistent at the same location I let them know about it and make it a point to always take my food back and get a refund or have my order fixed and complain. problem is, I have a hard time keeping my cool and not being an ass hole (though some people deserve it) , how can you get what you want and be assertive without being harsh? i don't want to be that guy that complains and is difficult but also hate wasting money on garbage service by lazy employees. problem is, being an azz hole is addicting when it helps you get what you want and then I tend to be like that a lot more often
.I think a solution to this is to not take it personally when someone is these circumstances messes up. Its not a reflection of you when a customer service person doesnt treat you right. Becuase they don't know you. Its a reflection of them. So the fact that you focus so hard on these peoples reactions is kind of wierd. I think more importantly when it comes to being assertive is how we can do better at it with the people that are actually in our lives, like friends and family. Because those people know you and will unfortunatley take advantage of any perceived weakness sometimes. So learning to be more assertive in those situations is way more important and applicable then in a situation with a dumb worker who is poorly trained or having a bad day. I think you need to grow up a bit. Because if you are constantly finding yourself in these situations as an adult, then its probably you.
post 1622685211 11-15-2020, 09:09 AM
-
#17
  1. Rexcalibr
  2. Handsome Rex
  1. Rexcalibr
  2. Handsome Rex
  3. Join Date: Mar 2014
  4. Location: Ontario, Canada
  5. Posts: 12,314
  6. Rep Power: 17506
Originally Posted By Misc420Doctor⏩
Why are you afraid of being seen as an *******?
sometimes im too harsh with people and i realize I was more angry then I needed to be. example, I yelled at my food delivery driver for being late, bad communication and difficult drop off but then after getting to think about it, I realized I really scared the kid (he was some young Indian or middle eastern guy). so I made sure to give him a good rating and good tip

it only feels good to be an azzhole when u really know it was justified in the situation
-best poster of 2017 (haters are jealous as fuk lol ya'll can't see me i stay crispy)
post 1622686111 11-15-2020, 09:21 AM
-
#18
  1. memcop
  2. Crassiest Modulator Alive
  1. memcop
  2. Crassiest Modulator Alive
  3. Join Date: Aug 2010
  4. Posts: 41,881
  5. Rep Power: 2018771
Well, start with realizing that facts don't change no matter how you feel. You only gain to lose if it is made personal.

Then navigate accordingly. I haven't read it but "The subtle art of not giving a Faurk" may be a good start.

You either have my business or you dont.
Homerotic Modulator, Envious of Idiocy
Quick Navigation Top Misc
Bookmarks
Digg.com
Digg
del.icio.us
del.icio.us
Stumbleupon.com
StumbleUpon
Google.com
Google
Facebook.com
Facebook
Posting Permissions
  1. You may not post new threads
  2. You may not post replies
  3. You may not post attachments
  4. You may not edit your posts